Pardon My Frenchie

18

Holding on to the end of the heavy tarp opposite Delonte Johnson, Thad helped him crab walk the load of plaster to the Dumpster that had been delivered earlier today. He’d figured they would need at least two loads hauled away during the course of the demo, but based on the rot they were finding as they sledgehammered the walls, he wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t fill it up twice that many times.

“Didn’t take long to reach the halfway point of this Dumpster,” Delonte commented.

“It means we got some good work done today,” Thad said. And that the inspector had missed a shit load of issues during his tour of the house. The structure was solid, but they had encountered several snags that could endanger their plans for opening by Veterans Day. Thad wasn’t willing to call this place a money pit yet, but it was getting close.

“You and Micah didn’t come to play around,” Thad continued. “I appreciate the hard work.”

Delonte and Micah’s approach to demo had been the unexpected highlight of his day. The two young soldiers required very little direction, and because they had been doing this kind of work longer than both Von and Thad, they’d offered advice that had saved them time and materials.

“Von mentioned you’ve been cutting hair on the side,” Thad said. “That true?”

“Nah, I’ve been doing construction work on the side,” Delonte said. “I’ve got a hundred apprenticeship hours to go before I can take the state licensing exam to be a barber. And you better believe The PX will be the first place I put in an application.”

“You’ll have a job waiting for you,” Thad said. He gestured toward the house. “Tell Micah that the two of you can head home. Von and I can handle the rest for the night.”

“You sure?” Delonte asked.

Thad nodded.

“At least let me help with the tarp.”

“I’ve got this,” Thad said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

As he watched the kid jog toward the house, Thad couldn’t help thinking about how that could have been him if he’d decided to leave the Army after putting in his four years. Yet, the more he thought about it, the more he realized that wouldn’t have been him, because he would not have had the option of going back to school to learn a trade. It was either the Army or joining his grandfather’s dry cleaning business.

Nothing illustrated just how much he’d hated the thought of becoming part of the Sutherland Dry Cleaning empire more than the fact that, when given the choice, he went with the option that could get him taken out by enemy fire. Thad had loved his grandfather more than just about any human being on the planet, and appreciated all he’d sacrificed, but he’d known the dry cleaning biz wasn’t for him from the first Saturday he’d spent behind the counter his junior year of high school.

Thankfully, Gramps had been more than okay with his career choice. Thad could still remember the pride on his grandfather’s face when he told him that he wanted to join the Army.

Thad had just finished folding up the tarp when Ashanti’s SUV pulled up in front of the house. He tucked the heavy plastic under his arm and braced himself for the impact of seeing her.

Denying that she affected him was pointless. Was it inconvenient? Fuck yes! But that’s where things stood. No use pretending her face didn’t pop up in his head a hundred times a day.

The worst game ever was the one he now played religiously, where he debated if things would be different between them if he’d never driven past this house. He’d earned the first mark against him by being a brash, ornery asshole the first time he’d met her, but Thad had gotten a sense that they were moving past that the day of the dog pageant. Buying this house had put the proverbial nail in the coffin of anything possibly happening between them.

Even so, she’d started to soften toward him over the past week, enough for him to believe that they could at least be friends. Maybe they could partner together for some type of function for military kids, like Grams had suggested.

The problem was he didn’t want to be just a friend to her.

Thad frowned as he watched her through the driver’s side window. She gripped the steering wheel tightly with both hands. It looked as though she was having an animated conversation, most likely with herself.

He usually found quirky shit like that to be annoying as hell. Why was it so fucking attractive on her?

She had been vague on the phone, only sharing that she needed to speak to him as soon as possible and that it would be better if she did so in person. He’d immediately checked in with his grandmother. Even though he was listed as her emergency contact, he wouldn’t have put it past her to reach out to her dog sitter before she called him. She and Ashanti shared a closer relationship than he first assumed.

But all was well with Grams. Well, other than the fact that she chewed him out for not bringing Puddin’ to see her on Sunday, and demanded he bring him tomorrow.

Ashanti finally got out of her SUV and, just as he had anticipated, Thad’s pulse started hammering on his carotid like Phil Collins pounding out the “In the Air Tonight” drum solo. But, as she approached, he noticed her smile was more apprehensive than friendly. It put him on edge.

“Hi,” she said.

“Evening,” Thad said. He tilted his head to the side. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong. I just—” She looked past him, and her smile grew a bit warmer.

Thad looked over his shoulder to see Von sidling up the stone walkway. He shot him a menacing look, which his business partner promptly ignored.

“Well, hey there, friend,” Von greeted.

Thad shoved the tarp at him before he could even think of reaching for Ashanti’s hand.

“Take care of this for me,” he said. “Ashanti and I have private business to discuss.”

“No, no, he can stay,” Ashanti said. “This affects him too. Well, in a way.”

“Really?” Von asked. “You looking to partner up with us, aren’t you?” He winked. “I’ve been thinking about ways we can work together. I told you I used to train dogs in the military, right?”

“Yes, you told her that,” Thad said. He turned his shoulders so that he was partially blocking Von. “Why did you need to see me so urgently?”

She took a deep breath, as if steadying herself. Thad braced for whatever she was about to throw his way.

“I received an interesting email today with a very interesting request. Do either of you watch morning news shows?”

“No.” Thad frowned.

“I’m usually running in the morning,” Von said. “I’ve had to add two miles to my daily run to combat all the great food I’ve been eating since moving to New Orleans.” He patted his flat stomach. “Gotta keep up this physique.”

“Why do you ask?” Thad directed at Ashanti.

“A producer from Up Early with Leah and Luke! contacted me this afternoon.”

“Whaaa?” Von said. “My mom loves Leah and Luke.”

“Everyone loves Leah and Luke. They have the highest-rated morning show in the country. They saw Puddin’ and Duchess’s viral video and want them on their show.”

“No shit!” Von said. “Those little dogs are making a name for themselves, huh? That’s crazy.”

“It’s absolutely bananas. The phones at Barkingham Palace have not stopped ringing since that video went viral. Someone even tagged our Instagram page with a Duchess and Puddin’ tattoo. We later found out it was only a temporary tattoo, but still, bananas right?”

Just then, Thad felt a couple of raindrops. He looked up at the dark sky. “Looks like that rain that’s been threatening to fall all day is finally here. Let’s take this inside.”

He wanted to send Von straight to his car, but Ashanti said this affected him too. Although Thad still wasn’t sure how.

They piled into the parlor. It was now just a hollowed-out space with several wall studs that would need to be replaced.

“Wow,” Ashanti said. “You all are making quick work of gutting my—this house,” she said.

“It turns out walls are easy to take down when they’re mostly rotted.” Thad grabbed several bottles of water from the ice chest they kept on the site. He offered her one, but she shook her head.

“No, thank you.”

“I’ll take one,” Von said.

He credited years of strict discipline drilled into him by the United States Army with stopping him from launching the bottle at Von’s head with the force of an FGM-148 Javelin missile.

Puddin’ started barking from the back room; he must have smelled Ashanti in the house. Their moldy, dusty surroundings couldn’t mask that slightly floral, slightly peachy scent that wreaked the most delicious havoc on Thad’s senses.

“Where’s Puddin’?” Ashanti asked, heading in the direction of the barking.

“He’s fine,” Thad said. “We keep him locked up to keep him safe.”

She opened the door to the downstairs bathroom that was just off to the right of the parlor. Puddin’ charged at her.

“Hey there, boy,” Ashanti said, rubbing the top of the dog’s poofy head. “I missed you today.” She looked up at Thad and Von, her expression both irritated and mournful. “I was at home making doggy treats all day. I didn’t get a chance to visit the daycare.”

She patted Puddin’ on the head, then ordered him back to the mound of blankets Thad had fashioned into a makeshift dog bed. Her choosing to leave Puddin’ in the bathroom was a clear indication of how important she deemed this conversation.

“Looks like the rain has stopped already,” she said, tipping her head toward the opened front door as she returned to the parlor. She clasped her hands in front of her. “So, about Up Early with Leah and Luke!”

“What time do you need me to bring the dog to the daycare?” Thad asked.

She shook her head. “They want Duchess and Puddin’ in their studio. In New York.”

He choked on the water he’d just sipped. “You want to bring my grandmother’s dog to New York?”

“Noooo.” Ashanti dragged out the word. “I want you to bring your grandmother’s dog to New York.”

Thad just stared at her. She had to be kidding.

Von was the one who spoke up. “When?”

“We would leave tomorrow.”

“Damn, you don’t play around do you?” Von said.

“Please,” Ashanti said. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but the Luke and Leah show is an amazing opportunity. This would benefit both of our businesses. The story is about Duchess and Puddin’, but this would also be a way for you to introduce your new bar to potential customers. On a national stage.”

“We won’t open for another month and a half. If we’re lucky,” Thad tacked on. “The country will have moved on to the next stupid pet video by then. You think people will remember me mentioning The PX in a five-minute spot on some morning show two months from now?”

“Yes, the country will very likely have moved on, which is why we need to capitalize on this now.” She grimaced. “Goodness, I sound like Ridley. But now I see that she’s right.”

“Who’s Ridley?” Von asked.

Thad turned to him. “I’m handling this, Von. You can pack up for today.”

“No, I can’t, because this affects me too. Partner,” Von added, his voice void of his usual affability.

Thad held his hands up, conceding the point. Maybe it was because The PX had been his initial idea and he’d brought Von in on it, but Thad recognized that he needed to respect Von as a full partner and deserved to be called out when he didn’t.

“I’m sorry,” Thad said. He motioned to Ashanti. “You were saying?”

She looked between the two of them. It was obvious she thought Von would be the easier sell, but concluded that Thad was the one she needed to convince.

“This could be your jump-off point,” she said. “While Duchess and Puddin’ are being their delightful selves on the show, you can talk about your new business and encourage viewers to follow your social media.” She held her hands up. “Hold on a minute. Have you ever thought about documenting the renovations via social media?”

“I’m not big on social media,” Von said. “I have the personality for it, of course, but it just seems like too much work.”

“I get it,” Ashanti said. “But you don’t have a choice these days, especially if you’re trying to attract people to your business. Having a social media presence now, in these early stages, is genius. People can follow along with the transformation of this gorgeous house into a bar.”

“The bar will be gorgeous too,” Von said. “But I get what you’re saying.” He turned to Thad. “I like the sound of this. It would get people invested in The PX before we ever open the doors.”

“And, best of all, it’s free advertising,” Ashanti said.

“It isn’t free. It’s costing me time away from the reno, the cost of flying up to New York—”

“The show is paying for our flights and two nights of lodging,” Ashanti said. “We’re flying up a day early because my friend Ridley is setting up a number of media spots while we’re there. She’s talking with a public relations specialist right now.”

“Wait, they contacted you this afternoon and you already have a PR person on this? I see why that little daycare you got there is doing so well,” Von said. “You ever think of doing PR for a sports bar-slash-barbershop-slash-cigar bar-slash-hangout spot?”

“I am not your person when it comes to PR,” she said with a laugh. “Believe it or not, my sixteen-year-old sister handles most of the social media and marketing for Barkingham Palace.”

“You sound pretty good at it to me,” Von said.

Thad was done with this one and his flirting.

“Give me tonight to think it over. I’ll get in touch with you in the morning,” Thad said.

“I need to know now. We need to book the flights as soon as possible and the PR rep needs to set up the additional media interviews.”

“He’ll do it,” Von said.

Thad whipped around. “You can’t make this decision for me.”

“You heard her, man. This is genius marketing. And it’s better to hop on the social media train with Puddin’s star power while the dog still has it. We drag our feet too long and we’ll both be out here doing TikTok dances to entice people to come to The PX.”

“Honestly, you may still have to do a few TikTok dances,” Ashanti said with an infectious grin. It made her freckles sparkle like rubies.

The ache that settled in Thad’s chest was as delicious as it was painful. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this attracted to someone.

“I think I have the solution to our problem,” Von said with a wink in Ashanti’s direction. “Thad, why don’t we call your grandmother and ask her what she thinks?”

“You’re such an asshole,” Thad said. “But you just reminded me of another reason why I can’t fly to New York tomorrow. I have to bring Puddin’ over to Grams’.”

“You’re going to see Mrs. Frances? Can I join you?” Ashanti asked. “I’ve been wanting to visit her, but things have been so busy at work. This is the perfect opportunity. We can go together, and then head to the airport.”

“It is perfect,” Von said. “There’s something about the way your brain works that’s just… I don’t know… thrilling.”

There was no way in hell Thad would make it to the grand opening of The PX without causing his partner bodily harm. He should just get it out of the way and kick Von’s ass right now.

He brought his hand up to the base of his neck and rubbed at the spot rock hard with tension. He honestly could not think of a single thing he loathed more than the thought of being on some morning talk show, sitting across from a couple of perky hosts with alliterative names. But Ashanti had made excellent point after excellent point, especially about documenting the renovations. It was a great way to start creating early buzz.

And what could be bigger than introducing The PX to the world via a national morning broadcast?

“Fine, I’ll do it,” Thad said.

“You will?” Her eyes grew wide before the brightest smile he’d ever seen lit up her face. His reaction to it was instant and intense. For a brief moment, if she’d asked, he would have gladly handed over his every possession to see that unrestrained smile again.

He was so fucked.

Thad cleared his throat. “I’ll text you the info you need to book the airline ticket,” he said.

“What time were you planning to visit Mrs. Frances? I can meet you there.”

He shrugged. “I guess I’ll go as early as possible if we have to catch a flight to New York.”

“I swear, this will be worth it,” Ashanti promised. “And painless. It will be worth it and painless.”

“And fun,” Von said. “You forgot fun.”

“That too,” she said with a laugh. She blew out a relieved breath and hunched her shoulders. “Okay, I guess I’ll see you in the morning.”

Thad and Von both started to walk her out at the same time, but she held up her hand. “I can see my way out. Get back to doing the work you were doing so you can get Puddin’ home.”

“See you tomorrow,” Thad called, leaning against the stud opposite the one Von leaned against. He glanced over at him and frowned.

“Hey, stop looking at her ass,” Thad warned the moment Ashanti was out of earshot.

“You’re looking at her ass.”

“I—” Thad swallowed the words he was about to say, along with water from the bottle he still held.

Von walked over to him and crossed his arms over his chest. Thad’s skin felt hot under his partner’s assessing gaze.

“Now, is it that you don’t want me to look at her ass because you want to be the only one looking at her ass? Because, if that’s the case, I can find another ass to look at.”

Thad took another drink, then mumbled, “Just don’t look at her ass.”

“Why not?”

If he could get away with knocking that shit-eating grin off Von’s face he would do it in a heartbeat.

“Because I want to be the only one looking at her ass, okay?” Thad confessed. “Shut up,” he said before Von could respond.

Von held up both hands. “That’s all you had to say, man. I do have one question for you, though.”

“What?”

“Did you consider what it’s going to be like to be up there in New York with her when all you want to do is look at her ass?”

Thad ran a hand down his face. Of course he had considered it. He just hadn’t taken the time to fully process it. This was why he hated making important decisions on the fly. He needed time to consider all angles, weigh the cost and benefit, and ponder the consequences.

He already saw one consequence he would be forced to wrestle with in New York: a persistent case of blue balls. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have to deal with that in New Orleans, but at least he wasn’t constantly around Ashanti when he was here. That wouldn’t be the case in New York.

“This had better be worth it,” Thad muttered.