Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

S asha sat in her office, rubbing the back of her neck. She was exhausted. One drunken night had led to the biggest mistake of her life and now she couldn’t get Maxwell Kane out of her hair. He was a pompous jackass in high school and he hadn’t grown out of it as an adult.

She hoped she would be able to leave and go home without Maxwell being there or showing up, but he showed up at her place of business instead. They had sex a whole year ago and somehow he thought that meant he owned her like he did everything else in this town. He was behind the revitalization of Easton Heaven. His money had brought in fancy new buildings with expensive taste. He wanted to swoop in and save her from some imaginary problem like he believed he’d done the night they slept together.

Sasha had hit an all-time low with the grief of losing her brother and what that loss had done to a relationship she would have bet her life on. It was the anniversary of Danny’s death and everything she thought she dealt with came to a head. She couldn’t remember what broke the well-built wall on her emotions but she ended up at Sour patch, the local bar on the other side of town, drowning herself in whiskey sours and Maxwell Kane.

“One more patient and you get to go home,” she whispered.

There was a knock on her door. “Come in.” She knew it was Tiny, but she braced herself in case it was Maxwell coming back to talk some more.

“You look like shit.” Tiny walked in with a file in her hand. “You sure you’re up for this last patient? I could always do the initial checkup and have them come back.”

Sasha smiled at the suggestion. “I must be really tired if you’re willing to take a look at a patient.” She flipped open the file and her lungs seized in her chest as she read the name at the top.

Derek Johnson.

Time seemed to stand still as memories of what once was and what should have been filled her mind until she felt the pain of the last time she saw him.

“I’m sorry, Sasha. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Derek had been her first and only love, and when her eyes caught the name of the pet he was bringing in the tears she thought she was done crying threatened to come back.

“Is this a joke?” The words were torn from her throat. She hadn’t seen Derek in a year, maybe. But she’d been painfully aware of his presence. She couldn’t avoid it in this town, but she hadn’t actually seen him or heard the deep timber of his voice that used to send goosebumps across her skin.

Sasha was up and out of her chair before she had time to process anything. Each step took her closer to a past she never had any closure on. The anger she felt toward him made her pulse race and she held onto it like a shield. She wasn’t sure what was going to happen when she finally laid eyes on the man who she had every intention of spending the rest of her life with and she wanted as much protection against him as she could muster up.

Sasha pressed her hands on the door to examine room one. She held her breath and pushed the door open. Derek stood in a burgundy shirt and gray sweatpants with his arms crossed over his chest, leaning up against the wall. His eyes had been glued to the door and her traitorous heart had her imagining the fire that danced behind his gaze was meant solely for her.

She took a tentative step into the room and the door closed behind her with a soft click. The air was sucked out of the room and he seemed to fill up the space they were in, leaving her little room to do anything other than breathe him in. He looked menacing in the way a wounded animal was being cornered. He’d lost weight but still managed to fill out his shirt and she could see the bags under his eyes, knowing he probably hadn’t had a good night's sleep since before he enlisted.

Derek liked to keep his demons close but they never went unnoticed. He wore them like an accessory he never went anywhere without. Everything in Sasha screamed at her to go to him and offer the comfort he desperately needed and that made her angrier. He was in her past. He shoved her out of his life and still, her first instinct was to comfort a man who no longer knew how to accept anything that would help him heal.

Sasha cleared her throat, trying to shift through what she was feeling on the inside. “Mr. John?—”

“Sasha,” he cut her off and dropped his hands to his side. He stood up straighter as he whispered her name with so much sorrow she thought her own heart was breaking. It was the same way he said her name after he used those same hands that had brought her so much pleasure brought her pain.

She shook her head. “Don’t, Mr. Johnson.” The time for apologizing and getting lost in what should have been had long since passed. They were different people now, at least she believed they were. She didn’t need to hear what was going on in his life, it wouldn’t change anything.

Sasha looked at the Pitbull that laid at Derek’s feet, the reason he was in her office in the first place. The dog was quiet and watchful. She could see the intelligence behind those otherwise sad brown eyes as its gaze bounced between her and Derek. She wondered what made him get a dog in the first place, remembering how resistant he had been to the idea when they were together.

No longer your problem. She mentally cursed herself for not even trying to pretend she wasn’t curious or still invested in him. The truth was she had forgiven him long before he had come home without her brother.

Sasha tried to be there for Derek when he came home, tried to help him through his nightmares but she hadn’t been able to overpower them. Her love for him hadn’t been enough to pull him out of his darkness and when the drinking and cheating became too much they fought. The arguments escalated until he pushed her into their full-length mirror that hung from the wall that was littered with so many pictures of their life together. Those pictures broke like the rest of their relationship.

She still had the faint scars on her neck and face from it. She remembered the look of utter shock and horror on Derek’s face when he saw her lying there. Maybe that’s why she didn’t blame him.

Inside where it mattered, she knew who Derek was and what he was capable of. He hurt her, but she knew deep down he beat himself up every day after that incident.

Derek snapped his fingers at Kai and the dog stood up and walked over to Sasha before sitting down in front of her.

She squatted in front of the dog with her hand out for the puppy to sniff her and make sure it was okay to pet her. “Is she friendly?” The dog barked and scooted closer to her, putting its head against hers.

Sasha closed her eyes, briefly letting her emotions wash through her. Her eyes stung from fighting back tears she had no business shedding over a man who no longer belonged in her heart. She took a deep breath, needing to center herself. In that moment, it felt like it was just her and the puppy.

Kai lending comfort to her.

Animals were amazing in the way people tended to fall short. It was why she wanted to be a vet in the first place. She wanted to give back a fraction of what she had seen animals give their humans. The way they unconditionally loved and held you together in the worst and the best of times. The one constant in your life when the world around kept changing and sometimes for the worst.

People may adopt animals and rescue them from shitty situations but more often than not, they rescued their humans.

Kai pulled back just far enough to drag her wet tongue from Sasha’s chin to her forehead causing Sasha to fall back on her ass with a laugh. The dog barked, wagging her tail before Derek snapped his fingers again, making her sit.

“You’re something else, huh?” Sasha laughed, wiping her face. She looked at the dog again and she could have sworn she saw the puppy smile and it weirdly reminded her of Danny. He had a knack for putting a smile on her face even when she didn’t want to smile.

God, she missed him.

“Alright, it’s nice to meet you too,” Sasha chuckled as she made her way to her feet. She absently petted the puppy’s head as she faced off to deal with Derek. Thanks to Kai friendliness she didn’t feel as off kilter as she’d been when she first walked into the room. This was going to be a breeze as long as she kept her focus on the dog and did her job.

Good luck with that.

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