Chapter Eight
Pierce
I thought about kissing her hand then. Without a helmet on, it would have been the easiest thing in the world to raise her hand from my chest to my lips, and to kiss her palm, or her fingers… or both. I want to kiss her lips, and her neck, and so many other parts of her, but to have kissed her hand would have been enough. It would have been a start.
It would have been a false start, though, given the way she reacted to me holding her hand over my heart. Doing that was an instinct, but it’s clearly not one that Harley shared, and I’ll admit, I’m really disappointed. I’d hoped for better than that, but I guess I was hoping for too much… and too soon.
The thing was, she’d tightened her thighs around me. I’d felt her do it, right after I’d rubbed my hand down the outside of her leg. All I’d wanted to do was check she was okay, and because we’ve got no comms, I couldn’t be sure. The tightening of her thighs felt like a positive response. But now I can’t help wondering if maybe I misunderstood that. Maybe she was tense, rather than anything else… and that’s not a good sign at all. It reminds me of the way she reacted to Kaiden, and I hate the idea she could think of me in the same way as him.
That’s why I’ve speeded up just a little. I can’t go too fast… not when neither of us is properly dressed for this, but I want to get back to her place, so we can talk.
If she’ll let us…
She’s got her hands on the tank now, rather than around me, and while that’s not a bad idea, and is certainly more comfortable when I’m braking, I don’t like it. I want her hands on me… all the time.
I’m relieved to see the turning into her parents’ driveway, and slow down to take it, parking beside Harley’s car, which is in front of the garage. Without waiting for me to turn off the engine, she leans up on my shoulders, climbing down from the bike, and as silence descends, I pull off my gloves and, with my feet firmly on the ground, I turn to face her. I don’t bother with the kickstand, though. Somehow, I doubt I’ll be invited in for coffee.
She’s struggling with the strap on my helmet. It’s different to hers, which is why she found it so hard to do up, and I lean over and grab her around the waist, pulling her close so I can help. I can hear her gasp, even from here, and try not to smile as I unfasten the strap, waiting for her to pull the helmet off, freeing her long hair, which tumbles over her shoulders. I’m tempted to run my fingers through it, but I resist, taking the helmet from her instead, and balancing it on the tank in front of me. Without a word, she unzips my jacket, shrugging it off to reveal the thin sweater she’s wearing underneath, and straightening her purse strap before she passes my jacket over to me, with a whispered, “Thank you.” I nod my head, half expecting her to turn away and go into the house. She doesn’t, though. Instead, she tips her head to one side and says, “I’m sure my parents and my brother will be grateful.”
I lean a little closer to her. “You honestly think what happened tonight had anything to do with Ben or your parents?”
She frowns. “Of course. You said…”
“I know what I said, and I only said it so you’d stop arguing with me.”
Her frown deepens slightly, like she’s having to give that some thought, and while she does, I pull on my jacket, although I don’t do it up, a fresh floral scent rising to greet me.
“This smells of you,” I say, pulling up the collar to my nose and inhaling deeply.
“Sorry,” she murmurs, and I let go of my jacket and gaze at her, straight into her sparkling blue eyes.
“Don’t apologize, Harley. I like it.” She tips her head again, which I guess means I’ve confused her, and I’ll admit, I kinda like that, too. Before she can dismiss me, and because I need to know, I ask her, “What happened with Kaiden?”
“Nothing,” she says, lowering her head.
“It didn’t look like nothing. You were scared. I noticed that the moment I walked in, and Dawson had clearly spotted it too. Besides, you said just now that he wasn’t your boyfriend… or you were trying to get him to understand that he wasn’t your boyfriend, even though he was acting like he was. What did that mean? What did he do?”
“That’s a lot of questions, Pierce.”
“I know. Why don’t you try answering them?”
“Because it’s none of your damn business.”
I feel the blade of her words cutting through me, just like it did on Tuesday morning when she last said that to me. Only this time, I refuse to listen.
“Yes, it is. It is my business, Harley… and you know it.”
She stares into my eyes for what feels like a minute, although it’s probably just a few seconds, and then she lets out a sigh, like she’s relenting, her shoulders dropping to prove the point. “Okay… it is.”
“Fine… then tell me what he did.”
“What do you think he did?”
“I don’t know. What I can tell you is, I know Kaiden, and I’ve got a pretty vivid imagination, so could you put me out of my misery here?”
“Your misery?”
“Yes.”
She frowns. “I don’t see why any of this would make you miserable,” she says, dropping her head slightly. When she raises it again, I notice there are tears in her eyes, and for the second time tonight, I reach out and put my arm around her waist, pulling her close. This time, though, I don’t let go, and I dip my head, looking up into her eyes.
“Tell me,” I whisper.
“H—He was so full-on,” she says, my muscles tensing, although I do my best not to let her feel it.
“Did he hurt you? Did he touch you in a way you didn’t want?”
“No… well, yes, I guess he did.”
My instinct is to pull on my helmet, ride back to town, find Kaiden, and live up to my bad boy image by beating the living shit out of him. But that’s not what Harley needs right now, and I hold her just a little tighter as she sucks in a stuttered breath.
“Can you explain?” I ask, realizing this may not be as easy for her as I thought.
“When he kissed me on Monday…” she says, her voice trailing to a whisper as she pulls a face. It’s one that tells me the memory of that kiss isn’t what it ought to be.
“You mean when you were crossing the street?”
“Yes.” She looks up, her puddled eyes making contact with mine and the sight of them breaking my heart. “You saw?”
“It was kinda hard to miss, but I wasn’t sure if he’d kissed you again… after that.”
“He did. When he walked me back to my car.”
“Okay, but are you saying that when he kissed you as you were crossing the street, you didn’t want him to?”
She nods her head. “We’d barely said hello. I wasn’t even thinking about kissing at that stage of the evening, but he didn’t give me any choice. He just grabbed me. I didn’t get the chance to say ‘no’, and even though I was trying to push him away, he just carried on. Then afterwards, he had the arrogance to suggest that his kiss was better than anything I’d have been used to.”
“He said that?”
“Yes.”
“Asshole,” I mutter, although I know Harley heard me. Her smile gives it away. “What about the second time he kissed you?” I ask. “You said he did it again when he walked you back to your car?”
“Yeah.”
“Was that the same?”
“No. It was worse. His hands were… they were everywhere.” She shudders, clearly remembering what that felt like. I glance down and realize I’m still holding her. She hasn’t pulled away, and maybe she even welcomes the contact from someone she knows. I can’t be sure. The one thing I’m certain of is I wanna do more than that. I can’t, obviously… not while she’s reliving that memory. But that doesn’t mean I don’t wanna hold her close and tell her it’ll all be okay. “I told him to stop,” she says, like she’s going through the event in her mind.
“And did he?” I ask, fear rushing through me.
“Yes.”
I sigh out my relief, nodding my head. “Did he apologize?”
“No. He said he’d wait… but the next time I saw him, he was all over me again. Like that was his idea of waiting.”
“Did you try talking to him?”
“How?” She says, leaning away from me. “He never let me speak.”
“If he was like that, why did you keep seeing him?”
“Because he kept catching me off guard. And besides, like I said to you earlier, he wasn’t listening. I tried to say I didn’t wanna see him, but he wouldn’t let me finish a sentence. He’d just talk over me, or shut me down.” She shakes her head. “I don’t think he’s capable of listening.”
“I’m not surprised. Knowing his reputation…”
She folds her arms across her chest between us, which interrupts me, right before she says, “If you’re gonna say I told you so, or remind me you warned me off, I’ll…”
“I wasn’t gonna say anything like that.”
“Good,” she says, giving me a glare, which softens as she unfolds her arms again, letting them fall to her sides, one of her hands resting on my arm, which is still around her waist. That feels nice… like there’s a connection between us, like it’s a two-way street, and she lets out a long sigh. “You’d be right, though.”
“Would I?”
“Yes. I should have listened.”
I nod my head, smiling at her, and she narrows her eyes, although her lips are twitching upward. I’d love to lean in and kiss her, just to seal the moment, but before I can, her smile fades and she gets a kind of desolate, lost look in her eyes… one that makes my heart ache.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“He made me feel so pressured.”
My blood freezes. “In what way?”
“In every way. It was like that kiss. He just took it for granted I’d be okay with it. He didn’t ask, he just did it. I suppose I should have realized what he’d be like when he picked me up from work.”
“I’m sorry?”
She shakes her head. “On Monday, we’d arranged to meet at MD’s, but he was waiting for me outside the office. He scared me half to death, jumping out at me like he did. That wasn’t just for our first date, but our second one as well… and then tonight…”
“What about tonight?” I ask.
“He’d decided we’d have drinks together and then go on somewhere else. I assumed that meant to a restaurant, or something. I tried to get out of it, but he kinda trapped me into agreeing. Then, when I said I’d meet him, thinking that would be the perfect way out, and that I just wouldn’t show up, he refused. He said he’d pick me up from here,” she says, looking around before she lets her eyes settle on mine again. I like that. It feels good that her gaze returns to me, and I nod my head. “I know that doesn’t have to mean anything, but there was something about the way he said it… about the way he was so insistent. It was like he wanted to be in control… like he wanted to be sure I’d have no way of getting home without him.”
I pull her close so she’s leaning against my leg, her grip tightening on my arm. Man, that feels good, and I swallow down the joy in my voice, just so I can speak normally. “You’ve always got a way of getting home, Harley. All you have to do is call. I’ll be there.”
She nods her head. “I know. Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.”
“Because that’s what friends are for?” she says, a smile touching at her perfect lips.
“Something like that.”
“Are we friends again?” she asks, sounding slightly scared, and I hold her just a little tighter.
“Something like that.” I smile while I’m repeating myself, nodding my head at the same time, because I don’t want her to think we’re not friends. We are… even though I know I want so much more.
I half expect her to pull away, or say she needs to go inside, but she doesn’t. She leans against me, moving her hand up to my shoulder and then resting her head on it.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers.
“What for?”
“For being so horrible to you the other morning.”
“You weren’t horrible.”
“Yes, I was, and I’m sorry.”
“You’re forgiven,” I say, and she leans away again. I want to tell her not to, but I don’t think we’re there yet. At least, she isn’t. She has no idea how I feel, or how much this means to me, or the panic that rises inside me when she shudders, pulling back and letting her hand fall to her side. “Hey… what’s wrong?”
“I—I was just thinking.”
“What about?”
“Kaiden.”
I don’t like that idea, and I sit back slightly. “What about him?”
“He had plans for tonight.”
“I know. You said. He’d intended for you to have drinks and then go on to a restaurant.”
She shakes her head. “Not a restaurant. I’d assumed that was what he meant, but when we got to MD’s, he told me we were going back to his place.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. He explained his mom was out for the night, and I think it was pretty clear what he had in mind.”
She shudders again, and I twist on the bike, using both hands to pull her back to me. “The guy’s an idiot, Harley.”
She frowns, pulling so far away, I have to release her. “For wanting me? Of course he is.”
I shake my head, although I’m not ready to explain myself yet, and I look up at the house. “Are you gonna be okay here by yourself?”
“Sure,” she says in a quiet whisper. “I’ll lock the doors and set the alarm. It’s what I’ve been doing every other night.”
“I can stay, if you want me to.”
The temptations might prove difficult, but I’ll do it if she needs me to. I’ll sleep on the couch, or in a guest room. She gives the idea a moment’s thought and then shakes her head. “No, thanks.”
I feel a little rejected, but I guess she’s still mad at me over what I just said about Kaiden, so I bury it and reach out to take her hand. She’s stiff, reluctant to be held, although I don’t let go.
“Do you want me to do anything about Kaiden?” I ask.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know… I can speak to him, or speak to Brady about him. Or I could just accidentally kick the shit out of him, if you want.”
She giggles, raising her free hand to cover her mouth, and then shakes her head. “Thanks for the offer, Pierce, but I’d rather just forget about him.”
“Okay. As long as you’re sure.”
“I am.”
Despite the slight thaw between us, I release her hand and pick up my helmet, holding on to it as I gaze into her eyes.
“You misunderstood me just then,” I say, flipping my helmet around, ready to put it on.
“I did?”
“Yes.”
“When?”
“When I said Kaiden was an idiot. I mean, he is… obviously, but you misunderstood what I meant. I didn’t say that because he so clearly wanted you. Wanting you is the sanest thing Kaiden has ever done.” She opens her mouth to say something, but I don’t let her. “The reason he’s an idiot, Harley, is because he didn’t realize you’re worth the wait… no matter how long it is.”
Her mouth drops open, and I smile, giving her a wink as I pull on my crash helmet, fastening it, and starting the engine before I slowly drive off.