Protecting the Boundary (LA Wolves #8)

Chapter 16

SIXTEEN

It takes two more away games—with Kaylee having an epic meltdown for one and a complete shutdown for the other—before the plan I discussed with Romel falls into place.

The flight was mostly uneventful. Kaylee was a little nervous about flying, but like most things, she was quiet and reserved about it. She watched out the window seat with wide eyes filled with wonder. Getting to the hotel was another eventful experience since she’d never been to a hotel before. She bounced on the bed and giggled which was probably the first time I took a breath since we’d left the house.

Now she’s coloring in a coloring book I bought for her and nibbling on her favorite snack while we wait for the game to continue. I forgot how much down time there is in football games when you’re watching them in person, and I guess it wasn’t as noticeable when we went to Romel’s home game.

She’s doing great until about the fourth quarter when she starts to get cranky, which is my first red flag that something is up because Kay is the happiest, go-with-the-flow kid I’ve ever met. Leaning down, I make sure she’s looking me in the eyes. “Are you ready to go? ”

She looks out on the field and then back at me, her eyes filled with exhaustion, but it’s clear she’s torn. She likes when I point out her dad playing even if she doesn’t really understand the game at this age and is busy coloring more often than not.

“Your dad will understand.”

She’s still torn, her eyes darting between me and the field.

I lean closer and whisper. “Can I tell you a secret?”

“What?” she whispers back, mirroring me.

“I’m bored,” I tell her, like I just committed the worst offense known to man.

She giggles and puts her hands over her mouth, her eyes shining. “Me too,” she whispers.

I sag dramatically. “Oh, thank God. Okay, here’s the deal. Let’s go and we’ll get in our comfy pj’s and watch some TV at the hotel, and then your daddy can come and say good night when he gets back. How’s that sound?”

“Yes,” she says, nodding her head.

I pack up our stuff and then take her hand in mine and we head out to the rental car Romel got for me, and once she’s buckled in her car seat, we head back to the hotel.

She only makes it through one episode of a cartoon before she’s passed out on the bed. I text Romel to let him know, but don’t get any response back. Instead of changing the channel, I keep watching her show while I snack on the popcorn I bought down in the hotel snack bar.

A knock on my door startles me an hour later, and I check on Kay to make sure she’s still asleep before I head to the door and check through the peephole to find Romel standing on the other side. The first thing that hits me when I open it is how good he smells. He’s freshly showered from his game and wearing his long-sleeved black button-down that hugs his pecs. Whatever cologne or soap he uses is wreaking havoc on my lady bits. He smells like the woods and man. My stomach tightens in a way it never has as I step back and let him pass me so he can come in and see Kaylee.

He walks over, his strides long and confident, and my chest squeezes at the expression of pure love on his face. He brushes his hand over her hair and then bends down to drop a kiss to her forehead.

“How was she?” he whispers as he walks back over to me.

Keeping my voice low, I tell him, “She was great. Got a little cranky at the start of the fourth, so we came back here and she passed out pretty quickly. I can’t get over how well behaved she is.”

He smiles, and for the first time I notice he’s got a small dimple on one side of his cheek when he smiles. My stomach swoops as I wonder how the hell I missed that. “Yeah, she’s always been that way. I don’t know if she’s just always known I was barely hanging on and needed her to not be a terror child, or if I just got really lucky.”

He leans against the wall and looks over at her. I catch myself still staring at his strong jaw and force my gaze to look at the sweet toddler sleeping soundly only a few feet away.

“Do you think this helped?” he asks.

“I think so. She seemed a little overwhelmed with the travel, which I expected, but she seemed less stressed than she is at home when you leave.”

He chews on his lip while he thinks. “Think we’ll need to keep doing this?”

His expression is open and earnest like my opinion matters to him, and I have to remind myself to breathe.

“Maybe one more time, but we’ll see how she does your next away game to know for sure.”

“I’ll follow your lead. I don’t want her to start to expect that she always gets to travel to these games because I don’t know if that’s sustainable either. ”

“I agree. I think we stay home your next away game and then maybe travel for one more game.”

He nods, still staring at me, and my breath grows shallow in my chest as my heart rate starts to gallop. I don’t know what it is about him that makes me feel like this, but I can’t stop responding to him, even if I know I shouldn’t. It’s stupid and won’t ever lead anywhere, but I can’t stop myself either.

It doesn’t help that he’s starting to treat me like we’re a team when it comes to taking care of Kaylee, and that makes me feel as if I mean more to him than I probably do.

“Thank you,” he says. He keeps thanking me as if I’m doing him a favor instead of doing my job—although I’d probably do this even if it wasn’t my job because I care about Kaylee so much now.

“You don’t have to thank me, Romel.”

“I do. I wasn’t sure about a nanny. It was Larissa’s prodding that made me give in.” His smile grows a little wider. “And like always, she was right. You are exactly what we needed. Kaylee’s been more outgoing just in the short time you’ve been around. So, I do need to thank you. Thank you for bringing some light into our life that we didn’t know we needed.”

My stomach tightens as emotion clogs my throat. This man has no idea what he does to me, what he makes me feel, or the power his words have to ensnare me further—even if it’s clear he’ll never be mine. He’s still too in love with his wife to let me in that way. To let anyone in really.

“I’m glad you don’t regret hiring me,” I say, trying to remind myself that I work for him, that this is a job, and that someday neither of them will need me in their life.

A pit forms in my stomach thinking about when that time will come, how devastated I’ll be to leave both of them, but it’s too early to think about that.

He pats me on the arm like I’m one of the guys, and my heart shrivels up inside my chest at the platonic gesture.

“Well, I should let you get some sleep too. Flight is early tomorrow,” he whispers, already reaching for the door handle.

“Good night,” I say, holding the door open for him to walk through. I close it behind him and flip the extra lock before leaning back against the door.

I wanted to feel again, and now I feel all the things I shouldn’t for the one man who I can’t have.

I’m so fucking screwed.