Quasim II: King Inferno (Season Four: Inferno Gods #2)

23. Blair

Blair

Recommendation: Never Gonna Let You Go by Faith Evans

“Why are you packing only my bags, Anjo? Are you making me leave? What did I do?” Elijah hysterically cried as I packed his bags for Barbados.

I started looking into therapists to help him with what he was going through, but I had trust issues. I couldn’t trust that someone would keep all he had gone through private without reporting it. They couldn’t report it because then that would get the authorities involved, and the authorities meant they would take him.

Especially because Lucia wanted him more than her will to breathe.

Dr. Killian Hill was the therapist to people like us. People that were involved in the streets or belonged to crime families, and she held everything down with a lock and key. Skyler told me about a therapist that Menace used. She also told me that he married her cousin. Apparently, it was a long story, and she would sit down and tell about it over wine.

“Come here, baby,” I called him to me.

He was so worked up; his face was red and he trembled because he truly believed he was disposable. I remember feeling just like he had felt, even into adulthood. Anytime Tyshawn told me that he was going to leave me, I would beg him not to leave me. My face full of tears, working myself up, just like Elijah was.

Only difference was that he was a child and still learning to regulate his emotions while trying to learn that we were his family now. I was a full adult, still suffering from childhood trauma, begging a man that meant me no good to stay with me because I didn’t want someone discarding me away like so many in the past had.

Elijah got down on the floor with me, and I pulled him between my legs as I wrapped my arms around him as he tried to steady his breathing. That little hiccup motion that children did when trying to calm down always made me sadder.

“I want you to take a few deep breaths for me, okay?”

He nodded his head as I directed him on taking the deep breaths to further relax him. I squeezed him and kissed his head as he did them, feeling him melt back into my arms.

“I’m…I’m sorry.”

“Never apologize for having feelings, baby. You are going to Barbados because me and Simmy are getting married. We want to send you first with the rest of the family before we come. We are never going to leave you. I want you to understand that… you are ours.”

“I am?”

I nodded my head while choking back my own tears. “Yes. We love you so much, Elijah. I promise that we will keep you safe and love you.” I squeezed him.

“I’m always going to come for you, Eli.” We both looked at the door to see Sim standing there. He must have just come in because he still had his sneakers on.

We watched as he took them off and came into the room, getting onto the floor with us. “I get scared sometimes. I don’t want to leave you. I make sure I don’t make mistakes, so you don’t get rid of me.”

He kissed his forehead. “Being a kid means making mistakes, son-son. You have to make mistakes to be a great man, right?”

Elijah nodded his head. “You do?”

“Yeah. I made a lot of mistakes in my life… I almost made the biggest one,” He looked at me and kissed my hands. “Men get scared, too, and I was scared of this woman right here.”

Elijah turned to look at me, as if he was trying to figure out why Quasim would be scared of me. “Why, Sim?”

“Adult stuff that you don’t need to worry about. All you need to know is that I get scared, and I make mistakes. I hurt Anjo’s feelings a lot of times, and I don’t like to hurt her.” He stared into my eyes. “I’m sorry for hurting you, my love. Promise to never let you go or hurt you again. G’s fuck up, too, Elijah.”

I didn’t bother to wipe my tears because I was a mess as I stared into his eyes. “I love you.”

“Love you more, my love.”

He hugged Quasim hard, and he rubbed his back. “I love you, Sim.”

“Love you too, son-son.”

“Elijah, can we tell you something?”

He released Sim and sat between the both of us. “A secret?”

“Not a secret.”

“Anjo is having a baby,” Quasim told him.

He looked between both of us, unsure on how he should feel. “Okay.”

“Tell me how you feel, E?” Simmy asked him.

He looked at his hands and then back at Quasim. “Will you still have time for me, too?” Elijah paused and looked at me, too. “Both of you?”

“Of course, we will have time for you. Babies take up a lot of time, but I can promise that I’m always going to make time for you. I should be asking if you’re going to have time for us?”

He stared at me. “What do you mean?”

“When the baby comes, I think you might be obsessed with it and never want to spend time with us… then you’ll be busy with CJ and Ryder and too cool for us.”

I watched a smile appear on his face. “Not true, Anjo.”

He fell back as I tickled him. “Uh huh… you’ll be too cool for me and Sim. We’ll have to make an appointment just to see you.”

I laughed as he rolled around laughing while I tickled him. “I’m gonna pee…. I’m gonna pee,” he hopped up in a fit of giggles and ran into his bathroom.

Quasim watched us and pulled me into his arms. “You a damn good mama, my love.”

I smiled and looked at him. “Gonna be… this baby ain’t here yet.”

He kissed my head. “Anjo, you’re a mama. I know you don’t say it because it’s painful, but you are a mother, and it doesn’t matter that your son isn’t here.”

I looked up into his eyes as the tears slid down my face and kissed his lips. “Thank you, baby. We have to protect him.”

“I have to protect y’all.” He kissed my head and placed his hand on my stomach, as I leaned my head back onto him.

“Well, I do have another situation, and he said he’ll protect me, too.” I joked to lighten the mood.

As I stared up at him, he looked down at me. “You ever been to a Luther Vandross concert?”

I looked at him confused. “Baby, he’s dead…Luther been dead for years….”

“Stop playing with me, Anjo.” He winked.