41. Kennedy
41
KENNEDY
SAME DAY IN THE EVENING, HOURS LATER
W e meet in the living room. Dad gives the cushion a lazy pat, acting like it’s no big deal that it’s almost evening and totally ignoring the “Weren’t we supposed to meet after lunch? Where have you been all day?” line of inquiry, and motions for me to sit.
“Ever since I found out you were working for Cade Gladwell,” he starts, “I haven’t slept a wink.”
I can relate. Neither of us has been catching much shut-eye lately.
I walk over and sink into the couch, waiting for his next words.
“Let me tell you about what happened that night.” My dad takes a deep breath and tells me what he saw that night. A young man he thought was one of Herron’s followers, and how it made him blind and deaf with worry. My dad’s words hit me, and a sickening sensation grips my stomach. I know which night he’s referring to, but hearing him actually say it out loud confirms my worst fears.
“He was no good for you. I was afraid that his being out there in the streets, getting mixed up in all sorts of illegal stuff, would make it only a matter of time before he broke your heart.” He lets out a deep, resonant sigh, and his big belly rounds even more before he exhales. “Or worse, that you’d become too entangled to break free from him, that you’d be ensnared in a terrible life.”
I struggle to hold back the bile rising in my throat.
A deep resentment at what I regard as my father’s betrayal wells up inside me.
“I was already too entangled!” I blurt out. I’m unable to articulate the storm of emotions raging within me. I’m relieved—even glad—that he finally told me the truth, yes, but goddamn it, it’s not the truth I was hoping for. “You didn’t give Cade a chance!”
He nods.
I shake my head.
I can’t stay in that cramped room a second longer. I shove the patio doors open and step outside into the cool evening air. It feels good against my burning soul. I stand there, unmoving,my eyes fixed on the garden that’s fading into the deepening twilight.
Then I hear Dad’s footsteps behind me and turn to him.
“I need some time, Dad,” I tell him. “Please, let me be alone.”
I walk away from the patio, and I start running. My breath comes in sharp, short bursts. Memories of being with Cade flood my mind and overflow my heart. I reach the small stone bench beneath an old oak tree at the end of the garden. I used to love sitting here, imagining my future! Today, I ignore the bench and pound my fists against the tree until my hands are all scraped up and I’ve cried my eyes out entirely.
Dad is waiting for me on the patio. I’m a little calmer now, and when he looks at me with those sad eyes, I know I have to forgive him. It might take a few more hours (at the very least!), but damn it, he’s my dad.
He made a mistake, and he admitted it. That’s a good start.
“You didn’t know Cade like I did,” are my first words to him. “I knew he wasn’t a criminal. I trusted him. He was protecting his younger brother, and they were both innocent. I would have believed him. You really crossed a line when you forced him to break up with me, Dad. Threatening him like that… making decisions for me…” I can’t go on.
“Sweetie, I made things right with him.”
My eyes grow wide. “What?”
“I made things right with him.”
“What do you mean? When?”
“This afternoon.”