Restrictions (Sterling Family #2)

46. Asher

46

ASHER

I t’s been almost a month since I found out Viv was going out on an actual fucking date with Sawyer. And since then, I've been doing my best to stay the fuck away from them both.

I’m angry. No, fuck that, I'm fucking livid.

I thought for sure he would get into her pants once and then be done, but now, a month later and during a game of hide and seek with Baz I walk past Viv’s room and see her all dressed up, staring into the mirror and applying lipstick.

For. Him.

I stop dead in my tracks, staring like a fucking creeper at her as she stares at her reflection in the mirror.

“Uncle Asher!” I look down at Baz as he flies out of the linen closet, gaining Viv’s attention as well as mine. She stays put, probably annoyed that I'm invading her space. Baz puts a hand on his hip. “You took too long. I’m bored.”

“Sorry, buddy.” I ruffle his hair, and he runs off to his room, giggling. I stand in place, my eyes glued to Viv.

Her hair is pulled up with her bangs swept to the side, and the dress she’s wearing makes me physically ache to be near her. It’s a short red dress with thin straps crossing in the back and dipping low, showing off her perfect cleavage.

I want to fucking scream.

“Asher, what are you doing?”

I walk into her room, and she turns away from me back toward the mirror, putting in a pair of diamond earrings as I stand directly behind her and watch her in the reflection. “What are you doing?”

I feel her tense. “I’m getting ready for a date with Sawyer.”

I roll my eyes and make damn sure she sees it. “A date? Sawyer doesn’t date.”

Her small shoulder lifts as she moves to put a diamond stud in the other delicate lobe. “I guess he does now.”

I lean in closer, but I don’t touch her. “You’re a game for him. Has he fucked you yet?”

She swallows, her eyes closing briefly, and then her eyes meet mine in the mirror. “I told you. That’s none of your business.”

My mouth nears her ear, my voice a husky growl. “And how did he feel about me being inside you the first night he took you out?”

“You’re a real asshole.” She spins around, her arms folded under her chest. “I can’t believe you told him that.”

I smirk, still glad I did. I wanted him to know. “It must not have bugged him too much. I mean, you’re going out again.”

Her lips curl in a devious smile, and I know I'm not going to like what she says next. “I guess he’s not afraid of a little competition.”

“Little, hell. We both know there’s nothing little about me.”

Her breath hitches, and I’m momentarily satisfied. “Trust me. He can hold his own.”

I stop the growl bubbling up in my throat, wanting to beat the shit out of him for touching her. That is, if she’s not bluffing. I study her, trying to decide if she’s just trying to hurt me. That’s not usually her style. “You sure about that? Sawyer’s always been all about him.”

She doesn’t falter. “Not with me.”

Fuck! Part of me wants to die. I don’t think she’s fucking with me. I think his hands have been all over her.

“What does it say about a guy who doesn’t mind you fucking his best friend? Huh, Viv? You think he actually cares about you?” I edge closer, picking up on her minty breath. “You’re a thrill.”

“What exactly is thrilling about me, Asher?” She drops her hands and leans in, accepting my challenge .

Every fucking thing . “You’re a single mom. You turned him down. You aren’t normally into guys like him. You were fucking me. Every single thing about you screams challenge, Viv. Don’t be so fucking blind.”

I hate the angry tears in her eyes. “He’s not like that.”

“Bullshit. I’ve known him a hell of a lot longer than you. He wants a thrill. You’re just another conquest for him.”

“You’re wrong. When you and I...” She’s flustered and can’t even say it as she uses her hand to sweep that thought away. “He had no claim to me, and I had no claim to him. We’re taking things slow, and he’s not a possessive asshole.”

“So, you’re just going to fuck us both then?”

Her eyes are cold. “You were a mistake.”

“One you would gladly make over and over again. You couldn’t spread your legs for me fast enough.”

Her hands ball into fists at her sides, and I think she just might hit me. Her voice is shaky. “Why do you care?” Her finger presses against my chest, leaving an achy, hot feeling in the spot she touches me, right over my heart. “You’re not in love with me. You don’t want a real relationship, so why the hell do you care who I'm with? Why does it matter, Asher?”

“I don’t want to see you hurt.”

Her eyes are watery with rage and frustration as she talks through clenched teeth. “No. You just don’t want to see me with him, or maybe anyone else. But you had your chance. We could have at least tried, but you’re a coward.”

“I’m not a fucking coward.” My body crowds hers as her ass presses against her dresser. I'm so angry I can’t even appreciate just how fucking good she looks in that dress.

“Yes, you are, Asher. You’re afraid to try. To fail.”

I scoff, and it’s cold and hateful. “I think you have me confused with you. Little Ms. Perfect, holding back, trying to be perfect and please everyone else until you explode and fuck up in huge ways that mess up everyone else’s lives.”

I swear I hear the smack of her hand against my face before I feel the sting it brings. She’s panting with fury, a tear streaking her cheek. “Don’t you ever call Baz a mistake. ”

I need to shut up. Back down. I’m in the wrong, and I know it, but I keep going. “I love that kid more than anything, but the way he came crashing into this world...” My face aches with the slap from her hand, and I'm sure her hand is in pain after the hard hit. But I refuse to show the pain, and so does she. I glare at her. “It started a destructive path that none of us will ever come back from.”

“That’s all I am to you. Your brother’s mistake.” I swallow the disgusting feeling, and I want to scream that it’s not true, but I don’t. I stand there, unmoving as she fights back tears. “That’s why you moved in with me, isn’t it?”

“What?”

She looks numb as another tear falls. “Colt died and left behind a huge mess. At first, you did everything you could to be there for your mother, and then when she was happy, you moved on to me.”

“No.”

I try to take her hand, but she jerks it away. “It’s true, isn’t it? Baz and me? We’re just his mess. He’s gone, so you took on his responsibility.”

“Vivienne . . .”

I reach for her again, but she moves further away. “I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone.”

A surge of anger kicks up, and I laugh at her. “Right. That’s why you went right to fucking Sawyer.”

She moves back toward me, her chin lifted high through her tears. “Sawyer is twice the man you are. He has the balls you lack, and at least he’s trying.”

“He’s trying to get into your pants.”

“He’s already been there.” I feel the tension soar through my body, and I feel a strange mixture of wanting to murder him and wanting to puke. Now it’s her turn to be cold as she leans in, her tongue flicking with fury. “Over and over. And he keeps coming back for more.”

I swallow hard. “You know I was Colt’s replacement all these fucking years...” I lean in, my jaw tight with fury. “But Sawyer is mine.”

My lips press against hers in a rageful kiss that she briefly accepts. Her mouth presses against mine and opens for a tongue lashing, but it’s over in a moment as she shoves me away from her, wiping her mouth with her hand. “No.”

I stare at her, fury in my soul and a dull ache in my chest. “No?”

She’s never turned me down before. “No.” She’s firm in her answer. “I’m done with this. I won’t do this.” She shakes her head and grabs her purse, going out of her room, and I hear her telling Baz it’s time to go to his grandma’s.

I take a seat on her bed, hating how I can still smell her perfume and her shampoo.

Hating that I truly am the definition of a fucking coward.