Royally Rebellious: An arranged royal romance (Resplendent Royals Book 1)

Chapter 31

“Darling, I know you are upset. I understand why. He doesn’t deserve you. However, you’re getting married, and we have a million plans. You cannot simply lie in here all day and ignore everyone. The entire house is getting nervous the longer this goes on. They will suspect something.”

Astrid sat on the edge of my bed. It was the week before my wedding. Rick’s family were about to arrive any moment now and we still barely spoke. Tonight, we had to open the opera together. I dreaded it.

“It doesn’t matter. Everything will work. It must. He has everything to lose,” I said.

“She is set to hand the documentation to end the regency off to the PM,” Astrid informed me.

“How do you know?”

“I overheard Lord William running his mouth to someone in the hall.”

“You were snooping.”

“What do you care?”

I didn’t. Or, rather, I shouldn’t.

“We must try on your dress anyhow.”

I shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. It’s all a joke.”

“Let’s have lunch, then go to the fitting. It will be nice. At least enjoy looking beautiful if you don’t enjoy anything else.”

I grumbled. It was hard to think about my wedding dress when I was so broken. I had spent three weeks licking my wounds. Rick and I were seen together just enough. I hadn’t kissed him since greeting him the night of our banquet. I couldn’t even look at the engagement picture he gave me. That day, he brought it to me along with the tiara his parents bestowed. It was lovely. I couldn’t wait to wear the new diadem with my reception dress but now the idea disgusted me.

“You will get to wear Mamma’s tiara,” Astrid said. “It will look lovely. The little girls don’t understand any of this. They want to see the two of you live out the fairytale. And they are desperate to see you in your dress.”

I sighed. “I guess I can do it for them.”

“Exactly. That’s the spirit! Now, come on.”

She pulled me out of bed, forcing me to put on actual clothing in preparation for our luncheon. Celeste had us come down more often these days. I loathed any day spent with her, but she was more withdrawn than usual. I attributed it to her taking the win. She seemed pleased that Rick and I were in a bad way. She preferred me miserable.

“She wants it to be like this,” I said to Astrid on our way to luncheon.

“Like what?”

“Me and Rick hating one another. She wants me to be so broken?—”

“I know,” my sister said. “I know.”

“So you don’t want me to give her the satisfaction?”

“No, I do not.”

We arrived at the dining room to find Rick seated, having an awkward conversation with our great-uncle Hubert. God, this was going to be the longest week of my life! There was no doubt about that. I tried not to look at him, but it was nearly impossible. I had to sit across from him. I had to look at his strong jaw and his big brown eyes. I must put up with the smile and those goddamn dimples. The situation forced me to endure the look of him this afternoon—his stubble perfectly imperfect. It made him look rugged and put together. I hated him for it.

“Good afternoon, Alexandra. You’ve been very busy today,” Rick said. “I’ve barely seen you girls.”

“Well, you know how it is,” I said. “Uncle Hubert. How are you?”

“Quite well, thank you. I have been talking to the groom about planning.”

“Ah,” I said.

I was confused about what planning they discussed. The only planning Rick had was a very basic understanding of how the ceremony would go and the parade route. Tomorrow, I would have to play act through the whole thing with him several times. I hope he read the information that Jacques provided.

“You are trying on your dress today?” Rick asked.

“Yes,” I said, confused.

“I read the schedule, Alexandra.”

“Ah.”

He was trying so hard, but no bother. Nothing he said or did mattered.

“Is Celeste coming to join?” I asked my uncle.

“No, darling girl. She has caught a cold and has taken ill. She met with the Prime Minister this morning and went to bed. Shouted at me to leave her alone when I attempted to bring her tea.”

“She met with the PM?” Astrid asked.

“And Prince Rikard, yes,” Hubert said.

I glared across the table at Rick. How was he invited?

“Oh, was there a changing of the guard to sign my life away into your hands?”

Hubert chuckled. I wasn’t joking, though.

“No. I was there to ensure matters were closed. I insisted she invite you as well, but… she didn’t.” Rick’s voice quieted and he looked down. “The bill was handed off. Parliament will sign off this afternoon, Lex.”

Astrid was bursting. “Really?”

Rick nodded. “It has been done. You could watch Parliament working. I am sure there is a channel here to do so. We have that in Lundhavn.”

“It is not so common here,” my uncle explained. “We are not as open.”

“Well, it will be done. It was a good conversation.”

Rick smiled.

I did not return it, nodding. “Good.”

“You are not so exuberant today as you were upon your engagement banquet,” Hubert said. “Are you feeling well?”

“Just nervous,” I lied. “Wedding jitters. I must try on my dress. I am worried.”

Lunch continued. Astrid and Hubert yammered on. I would occasionally catch Rick looking at me. It killed me. He was still hopeful. Why? He never mentioned trying to save the thing with the press. He never pleaded with me to stay. He always just told me he wished me well. Yet, I could not get over how much he hurt me.

It was the first time I had loved anyone and the first time anyone had ever hurt me quite as intimately. I’d never thought about being with anyone before Rick. He’d made me think such dreadful things all the time. And then, he’d shattered it. He made me feel stupid. He betrayed me.

It was one more desertion. My mother and father left me so young. I wanted the person I married to stick around for good—to be honestly invested. At the start, I told myself I was hardened against loss. Now, I knew better. I yearned to trust my husband. With Rick, there was no trust. I had nothing with him. I wished he would have been honest, but could he even be honest? I wasn’t sure.

We navigated down to the salon where my dress was waiting. My sisters crowded me, excitedly. I had long awaited my duchesse satin beauty with its long, gorgeous train and its sweetheart neckline. I wanted so badly for it to be perfect. If there was one thing I could have, it would be to look beautiful on my wedding day in front of millions. The dressers took me behind the screen to do the unveiling.

Sadly, something was wrong.

My ivory gown was replaced by a sad white disaster. The sweetheart neckline was now closer to a square that came up to just below my collarbone. It looked matronly. I began to cry. The dress was all wrong.

“What happened to it?” I asked.

“There were changes made at your request,” the designer said.

I cried, standing in front of the mirror now. All three of my sisters gathered around me. Astrid held me up as I broke down.

“It still looks beautiful,” Odette said.

“I look like a bloody nun,” I cried. “It’s ruined! She ruined it.”

“Did these changes come from our grandmother?” Astrid asked.

“They came from the palace,” the designer said. “We were told to raise and alter the neckline and use the white satin instead of the ivory originally ordered.”

I shook in anger. She’d kept me in the dark this whole time. Normal royal brides would have had three or four fittings. She swore this was fine, but as I compared notes with Marie, I knew it wasn’t. I suspected something was up then, but this was next level. I was beside myself.

“I’ll be back in a minute,” Astrid said.

Before I could tell her not to go, she ducked out. I worriedif she tangled with Celeste, it would blow up in our faces. At the same time, I knew it couldn’t get worse than this. Standing in a dress fit for a sixty-year-old religious virgin, I felt hideous and ridiculous. Anymore I didn’t care. If I emerged in this number, I’d be the laughingstock of Europe. If Neandia was already known as conservative and weird, it was about to get much worse.