33. Leah
33
LEAH
“ S urprise! ”
I nearly toppled backward into Logan’s chest as the cacophony of voices from inside the DeRossis’ house scared the bejeezus out of me.
Logan just chuckled under his breath as he bracketed my hips with his hands and kept me upright.
The blue and green baby shower decorations hanging in the basement lounge weren’t what I was expecting for Monday’s poker night. Pizza was nowhere to be seen. In its place was a spread fit for royalty.
The crowd in the house was bouncing with excitement as I wobbled inside.
“What happened to poker night?” I said as I weaved through the crowd to hug the collusive women who looked far too proud of themselves.
Kristin and Kylie were the first to offer me quick hugs before stepping back so Hannah Jane Lawson and Maddie DeRossi could swoop in.
“Y’all didn’t have to throw me a baby shower!” I said as I squeezed them tight.
Maddie scoffed. “Of course we did. Do you really think we’d pass up a chance to have cake?”
Hannah Jane laughed. “You’re family. You help us raise our kids. You do so much for us. Frankly, I have no idea how you’re still working. I was dead on my feet by thirty-six weeks.”
“Because you’re only letting me chauffeur the kids around and won’t let me lift anything or be on my feet.”
Hannah Jane winked at Logan as he mouthed, “Thank you.”
“Miss Leah!” Gio said as he bolted down the stairs. He bobbed and weaved around bodies before nearly tackling me in a hug. Ellie was hot on his heels.
I gave them both tight hugs. “Hey, you two.”
“Did you like the surprise?” Gio blurted out. “Me and my dad made all the food.”
I eyed the spread. “It looks amazing. I can’t wait to eat it all. What should I start with first?”
“I’ll make you a plate!” he said before darting off.
Ellie hugged me a little longer than usual. She wasn’t the affectionate type, which made every little show of it all the more special. “Are you going to come back and be our nanny after the baby’s born or are you leaving for good?”
Hannah Jane pressed her hand to her mouth.
“Oh, honey. I’m not going anywhere,” I said with a laugh. “I’ll just be gone for a few weeks. Maybe I’ll even come over and hang out with you guys one afternoon, or you can come to my house.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “Promise?”
I held my pinky finger out. “Pinky promise.”
That brought a smile to her face and she gave me another hug. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Logan’s hand was warm as he gently rubbed soothing circles across my lower back.
Everything hurt these days. As scared as I was to have a C-section, I was ready for it to be over. The bliss of pregnancy had been replaced with sleepless nights full of anxiety and all the “what ifs.” I was ready for the next phase of life where two became three. I was ready to know what our son was like. I was ready to hold him.
“Have you guys finally decided on a name?” Erica asked as she navigated the crowd and slipped a mocktail into my hand.
“Not yet,” I said with a sigh. “I’m starting to panic. We can’t agree on anything.”
“What about Kyle?” Zoey said. “You know, like Kylie but a boy.”
“Absolutely not,” Bridget, Kristin’s friend, shouted from across the room. “You’ll curse the child.”
Logan shook his head.
“There’s not really a masculine version of my name, so I’ll just have to wait for y’all to give me a niece,” Zoey said.
“Hunter’s a good name,” Hunter called out.
I looked at Maddie and Hannah Jane. “So, the family is no help.”
“Oh yeah,” Maddie said. “Kristin had some terrible suggestions when I was pregnant with Gio.”
Hannah Jane nodded. “I think Kylie was even worse at coming up with names when I was pregnant with Eloise.”
“We’ll figure it out,” Logan said as he pressed a kiss to my temple.
The ladies forced me to park myself in the middle of the tufted crescent couch and kept my plate full and my drink topped off. Everyone settled in after surrounding me with gift bags and boxes and baskets piled high with everything imaginable.
By the time I had made it through half of the presents, Logan and I were buried in onesies, diapers, and wipes. Will and Hunter packed up the first half of the gifts so that we had room to open the second half.
“You okay?” Logan asked as he swapped the unwrapped baby clothes in my lap for a new bag.
“A little winded,” I said quietly. “A little overwhelmed.”
He nodded understandingly. “I used to feel that way on Christmas morning. Kristin’s friends”—he cut his eyes to the Monday night poker club—“used to do this for us. Christmas...Birthdays...They spoiled us because they knew Kristin couldn’t afford it.”
He paused and helped unpack the gift bag while everyone oohed and ahhed over the fancy baby monitor set.
His voice went quiet again. “On one hand, I loved it. But it was always a tough pill to swallow. It made me feel undeserving because I hadn’t done anything to earn it.” He put it back in the bag, moved it over to the side, and then plopped a neatly wrapped box in my lap. “But as I’ve gotten older and can look back on it a little more objectively, I’ve come to realize that’s the whole point. Let people love you just because they do.”
I leaned into him and rested my head on his shoulder, soaking in what family felt like.
It was something we both craved for vastly different reasons. Even though I was grateful for the community that had brought us in as their own, it was still overwhelming.
We managed to tackle the tidal wave of presents, and said profuse thank yous. When the pile was reduced to a sea of tissue paper and wrapping paper, I slipped out of the room with the excuse that I needed to use the bathroom.
A hand clasped around my arm as I rounded the corner to slip up the stairs.
“Oh my god,” I gasped as I pressed my hand to my chest. “You nearly made me pee myself.”
“Why are you escaping?” Kylie asked as she crossed her arms. “Because if it’s something my brother did, we can fit his body in the trunk of our getaway car and ride off into the sunset like Thelma and Louise.”
I laughed. “Why do you always threaten to kill him?”
She threw her arms around me. “Because I loved you first, and I’ll always hold that over his head.”
“You’re the closest thing I ever had to a sister,” I confessed. “Fights and all. My baby is lucky that he gets you for an aunt.”
Kylie’s eyes softened as she peered around the corner and watched as Logan sat on the couch, laughing and talking with the group. “You brought him back to us.”
“I think the baby did that,” I said as I leaned against the wall.
“No,” Kylie said. “I saw him that night. I was dancing with Bryan, but I saw Logan watching you.” She peered around the corner again. “It was the same way he would look at you when we’d see him in passing in high school.”
She tugged on my hand and made me crane around the corner until I caught sight of Logan looking back at me.
“It’s the way he still looks at you now,” she said quietly enough for it to stay just between us. A smile worked up the corner of her mouth. “He keeps that stern shield up because he’s fiercely protective of the people he loves. But I think he’s loved you longer than even he wants to admit.” She squeezed my hand. “I’m just glad that I had you first.”
We stood there for a moment, crammed in the hallway, soaking in the last of what life was like before everything changed.
“Are you ready for your C-section?” she asked.
“No,” I admitted. “It freaks me out. I always thought I’d have this magical, primal labor. But I think it’s the best option. My OB agrees. It’s just...Not what I planned.”
“Life rarely is. But I think the best things in life happen when the plan goes out the window and we live in the margin between what is expected and what’s anticipated.”
The last year of my life had been anything but planned, but it had been the best surprise. It had given me more than I could have asked for. It healed wounds I was certain would never close.
“You’d better believe I’m going to camp out in the hospital parking lot with a sleeping bag and the biggest cup of coffee I can hold, waiting for Logan to call and tell me everything went just fine. And I’ll be at your beck and call for whatever you need when you get home. Bryan’s already been warned that he’ll be sleeping alone unless he comes and helps. Laundry, cooking, holding the baby so you can shower and take care of yourself—whatever you need.”
“Thanks, Ky,” I croaked. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“I’m not worried because I know Lo won’t let anything happen to you or that sweet baby. He’d walk through hell and back for you.”
Logan slipped out of his seat and made his way over to us with concern marring his face. “What’s the matter? I thought you were going to the bathroom? Is everything okay?”
“Told you,” Kylie said as she squeezed past him and rejoined the party.
“I’m fine,” I said as I pressed my palms to his chest. “I just needed a minute to catch my breath.”
“What were you and Ky talking about?” he asked.
I smirked. “Just how she’ll castrate you and store your balls in a jar if you ever piss me off.”