Single Dad Seeking Love

18. The Perfect Cup of Tea

The teabag slowly tints the water. The milk swirls and mixes. The steam rises. I’ve read that mindfulness is a good technique to keep your head clear, and right now, I’m giving my cup of tea all the mind I have.

The apartment is quiet, the TV off, the only sound is the traffic from the road. The occasional car lights flash against the ceiling. I left Adam at his mother’s with the promise to take him swimming tomorrow. I knew I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to look after him tonight.

God, I’m lonely.

If I’m honest, I’ve always been lonely, even back when I didn’t know I was. I filled the gap in my life with girlfriends that I doted over. How can I move on from Trevor? I see the image of his sad eyes every time I close mine.

I startle. There’s a knock on the door.

I don’t want to see anyone right now, but I plaster a smile on my face as I walk up to the door and open it.

My heart stops beating.

It’s not a neighbour asking for sugar.

Sparkling blue eyes hold me captive. “Hi.”

Only a stuttered breath leaves my mouth in reply. I curl my fingers into fists to stop myself from reaching out.

“Can… can I come in?”

I rush to the side, pulling the door fully open, desperate to have him in my apartment, as if he would disappear out in the hallway. His wide frame brushes against mine in the narrow space as he walks past.

Trevor stops in the living room, and my cheeks heat in embarrassment of the small soulless space. It seems even smaller with Trevor’s massive presence.

“Do you want a cup of tea? I just boiled the kettle.” My voice is finally working.

“Sure.”

I don’t know how he takes his tea. How come he consumes my whole being, but I don’t know this trivial fact about him?

“Milk? Sugar?”

“Just a splash of milk, please.”

Splash of milk.

I walk over to the kettle, but his words stop me.

“Do you know how many roundabouts I had to drive through to get here?” His fists are at his waist and feet planted wide apart. Stunned, I watch him wave his hand dramatically in front of him. “Do you realise there are crazy junctions with eight – ten lanes to weave through? Where it’s impossible to know what traffic light was the one I was to follow? You just had to live on the far side of Belfast, didn’t you?”

Laughter bubbles up my throat. I can’t help it, can’t stop it. Trevor’s face breaks out in that cheeky grin that I love.

He steps closer. “I’ve missed the sound of you, city boy.”

Warmth spread in my core at the sound of the nickname. “What are you doing here, Trevor?”

“Julie has a boyfriend.”

“Really?” The change of topic confuses me, but I’m happy for her.

“Uh-huh,” Trevor nods. “Steve from Colerain. She had to go to Belfast to find herself a bloke from down the road.”

“And… how is he?”

“Didn’t have time to interrogate him, I was too busy avoiding Julie’s kicking boot.” I want to ask what he means, but it doesn’t seem important when he steps even closer. Those eyes that have haunted me every minute of the day these last months take me in, searing my body as he swipes his gaze up and down my frame. That familiar tilt to his mouth makes me salivate for the sarcastic tone that I know will lace his words. “She was yelling at me, telling me that I can’t hide in the barn forever. She says it’s worse than hiding in a closet. She literally plotted your address into my satnav, put my keys in the ignition, started the car and forced me into it.”

“You didn’t want to come down here?”

“Only because of the traffic.”

“What are you saying, Trevor?” This must be what it feels like to jump off a plane. A pounding heart, fear and elation.

“I’m saying…” His head drops. Then he glances up at me through his lashes, uncertainty flashing in the blues. “Will you give me another chance?”

I can’t even try to play hard to get, I just nod. A whoosh of air leaves Trevor, and he grabs my face with both hands.

“Yeah?” he asks, his eyes flicking between mine, searching for doubt. He’ll not find any.

I nod harder. “Yes, Trevor.”

His gaze turns dark and needy. My breath is forced out of my lunges as he pushes me roughly against the wall. His lips are firm, brutal, frantic, and I answer with total eager submission. Fireworks go off inside my skull and I grab his shoulders, digging my fingers into his firm muscles. He’s real, not a figment of my imagination. I moan in sheer relief and open my mouth to his probing tongue. He invades me, literally and metaphorically. My hands glide higher, over the beard I’ve been itching to touch all day long.

He leaves paths of fire up my body as he reacquaints himself with every inch of my torso. He breaks the kiss. “You’ve lost weight,” he says, his brows furrowed.

“I haven’t been hungry.”

“You need me to look after you?” His teeth scrape down the column of my throat.

“God, yes…”

The rubber band drops to the floor, and I thread my fingers through his hair.

“I’ve missed you,” he admits. “We had so little time together, yet it feels like I’ve known you forever. I’ve been lost without you.”

I whisper his name and my heart swells and keeps swelling as more words spill from his mouth. “What have you done to me? That one week, you gave me hope and light.”

“One week, and you made me face my life lies,” I counter.

I struggle to keep my breath as his lips are back on my throat, burning a path. I grind against him, groaning as he hardens. I pull at his sweater. “I need to feel your skin, need to know you’re real.”

There’s a frantic edge to our movements as we strip out of our clothes. Fingers explore every inch of uncovered flesh. Excitement is boiling in my veins as we’re both sprawled out on my two-seater sofa, feet hanging over the edge. Skin on skin. Trevor caging me in on top, blocking out the harsh world, keeping me safe in this reality that is still so new to me.

He lines his hard cock against mine then grabs them both in his large fist. I gasp at the unfamiliar sensation. Yeah, it turns out my low sex drive had all to do with not being with the right person.

“Help me, let’s do this together,” Trevor whispers, his lips caressing mine.

I bring my hand down and together we move up and down our lengths.

“I’m not going to last,” I whimper.

“You never did.”

I burst out a laugh and he chuckles above me.

“You’re such a dick,” I mumble. The laughter is soon replaced by deep moans and urgent kisses. My hips jerk up into our joined hands. He grabs my ass, digging his fingers into my glutes and guides my movement. I gasp and pull at his hair, my chest rubbing against his.

“Trevor, God, I… please, I… please.” Words of need and desperation fill the room. Trevor’s harsh breaths tell me he’s close too.

“Together, Jamie. Together,” he pants, eyes locked on mine.

What he sees has the corner of his mouth tilt, and that is my undoing. My groin bursts in heat, a tremor runs through my body before I tense up, my fist clamping around our lengths. Trevor’s cock glides along mine in jerked movements as my release shoots up my shaft.

“Trevor…”

He grunts, and on a choked roar, he joins me, our hot cum mixed on my stomach.

Trevor collapses on top of me. He’s heavy, but I don’t ask him to move, even after my breath is back to somewhat normal.

His lips tickle my throat. “I finally understand why the French call it a small death. You’ve slayed me, city boy. Slayed me with your pale eyes that can’t hide what you feel.”

He manuevers me then, turns me around so I’m sprawled on top of him, both of us ignoring the sticky mess between us.

I’ve never heard a sweeter sound than that of his heart beating under my head. Delicious thrills spread on my naked skin where his fingertips caress me.

“You never got that cup of tea.”

“I hope there will be a lifetime of chances for you to make me tea.” He hums. “If it wasn’t for the noise of the traffic, I’d say I was one hundred per cent content right now.”

“You’re such a country boy.” I grin while my heart threatens to burst through my ribcage.

“Let’s get out of this dirty city.” Yet there’s no urgency in neither his voice nor the languid stroke of his fingers up my back.

“Where should we go?”

“I know this place, a campsite. They’ve just added a shepherd’s hut to their offerings.”

“You’ve finished doing up Glenda?

“Uhuh. It needs testing. To see if it’s sturdy enough.”

“A fucktest?”

His chuckle rumbles through his chest. I sense myself blush at my own crude words. “I may have to spank you for that dirty mouth of yours.”

“I’m older than you,” I mumble.

“You could be fifty, and you’d still be my boy.”