Space for Growth (Spire Station #3)

Chapter 22

22

F ifty thousand credits. That’s how much it’s going to cost to get the data decrypted. And that’s with the discount I charmed my way into.

Vash-ka. I’ve tried so hard to only take safe gigs. I didn’t want to risk anything happening to Paul. But we’d have to work for a standard year in order to make enough to cover the fee doing those sorts of jobs. By then, whoever set me up will be long gone.

With a heavy sigh, I finish sending a comm to Narem, the vuloi I ran into back on Gryxyx. We met doing a job together, and he’s my best chance at finding work that will pay what we need that won’t be a scam or a suicide mission.

The flirty tone of my message and the insinuation that my gratitude might result in another night together doesn’t sit well with me, but I need to make this work. Protecting Paul as much as possible and getting him back to Spire safely is more important than any guilt I feel about hitting on someone else right after kissing him.

Stars, that kiss.

I thought I was dreaming when he pulled my mouth to his. Everything around us stood still and the rest of the universe ceased to exist outside of where we were joined.

I knew I was attracted to him. That I found him arousing, and I enjoyed spending time with him. That still didn’t prepare me for the wave of emotions that crashed over me when our lips met.

It’s more than a little terrifying, the feeling of truly wanting someone. I haven’t let myself experience it in a very long time. Not since the sting of rejection and heartache from trying started outweighing any of the pleasure of searching for romance.

I don’t want it to destroy me when he leaves. My years of experience have taught me that this is only temporary, and I know I should put a stop to it before it goes any further. Tell him I like him, but this isn’t a good idea for either of us.

I need to talk to someone about these feelings before they make me do something stupid, like ask Paul to be mine. But I’m not sure I can deal with Rema’s smug satisfaction that she was right about me being interested in Paul.

I swipe open a comm chat with Frea’set, figuring I should update him on our current situation. If it comes up, maybe he can give me some advice for how to handle things with Paul.

Hadrell: Hey, just wanted to let you know how things are going.

A few minutes pass before I get a reply, and my mind replays kissing Paul on a loop while I wait.

Frea’set: Hey!

Frea’set: I’m afraid to ask—is it a good update or a bad one?

Hadrell: A bit of both.

Frea’set: Isn’t that always the way?

I can picture Frea’set’s lopsided, toothy smile as I read the words. I miss seeing it in person. He was a part of my crew for many years before he decided to branch off into brokering jobs rather than taking them.

Hadrell: In my experience, yeah. I have someone who says they can decrypt the source of the job request comm, but it’s going to cost a ton of credits.

Frea’set: Well, it was a long shot anyway. Chances are whoever is claiming they can do the job will take the credits and run.

I’d thought of that possibility myself, though I’ve never had any issues with my contact. They’re expensive because they have a good reputation. If they weren’t asking for a lot of credits, then I’d be more skeptical.

Hadrell: I know that’s a risk, but what else am I supposed to do?

Frea’set: You’re not going to want to hear my answer.

I snort as I read his message. He’s probably right.

Hadrell: That doesn’t mean I don’t want you to give it.

Frea’set: Lay low for a while. Take some odd jobs and wait for the Consortium to lose interest. I know spending a few years out in the middle of nowhere isn’t ideal, but it’s the safest option.

I frown at my comm. Maybe if we didn’t have Paul with us, that’d be a viable option. But I can’t keep him away from his life that long. What I’ve already done to him is bad enough.

Hadrell: I can’t do that.

Frea’set: Why not?

Hadrell: I may have accidentally abducted somewhen when we fled Spire.

Frea’set: Okay. Not great, but I don’t see the issue. Send them home on a transport.

Hadrell: I can’t

Hadrell: He’s a human.

There’s a long pause and I regret telling him about the extra layer of complication for my situation.

Frea’set: Vash-ka, that’s bad. Really bad.

I thought talking to Frea’set would help me feel better, but it’s only making me more agitated.

Hadrell: I know that! So that’s why I need to get the credits and figure this out. I can’t keep a human hostage for years. Then I’ll really end up in a Consortium prison colony.

Frea’set: We can figure this out. I’m sure I know someone who can smuggle him back to Spire without it being linked to you.

Frea’set: We’ll also have to find a way to convince him to not report you.

Hadrell: I’m not worried about that. He understands it’s a mistake.

Hadrell: He’s decent company.

Frea’set: Hah, considering who you have on your crew, that’s not saying much.

Frea’set: Speaking of which, how’s Rema?

His message makes me chuckle. Every conversation we have always comes back to his ex. Rema still wants nothing to do with him since they broke up, so I try to stay neutral, but it’s hard because I care about both of them.

Hadrell: She’s as good as can be expected, given our present circumstances.

Frea’set: You’re taking care of her?

Hadrell: Hah, you know she doesn’t need me to do that. She can take care of herself.

Frea’set: I know, but I still worry.

I used to not fully understand, but now that I have Paul in my life, that worry makes a lot more sense.

Hadrell: I get it. I have someone I’ve been worrying about a lot lately, too.

Frea’set: Oh?

Hadrell: Yeah.

Hadrell: I’m not sure what to make of it. My emotions are really tangled up, and it’s hard to know what to do.

I start typing a message to explain what’s going on with Paul, telling Frea’set how I’m falling for my human captive and I’m terrified of those feelings.

Frea’set: Sorry, I have to meet with a client. It’s a high security job, so I’ll be comms silent for a few cycles.

Frea’set: But I know you’ll figure it out. You always do.

Frea’set is busy and has other things to worry about than my romantic life, so I try not to take offense at him abruptly ending the conversation. Still, I really would’ve liked to get his advice on this.

I delete the long message I was working on with a sigh.

Hadrell: No worries. I’ll be in touch when I have more news.

Leilit makes a sleepy chuff on the bed next to me, and I close my comm. Her eyes blink open, and she stretches out her stubby legs with a huge yawn. I scoop her up and cradle the small puffball against my chest, wishing her soft rumbling purr would stop the hopeful ache in my chest as I think about who I got her for.

It’s not long before the human in question appears in the doorway, shirtless and flushed, carrying a crate of things for Leilit and smelling intoxicating . My worries fade into the background as I take in the sight and scent of him.

I put the flesstra down and move to Paul’s side, taking the crate from his hands and setting it aside, then pulling him against me and pressing my mouth to his in a needy kiss.

He makes a muffled sound of surprise against my lips, his hands balling into the front of my shirt like he’s worried he’s going to fall over otherwise.

I never imagined how much I’d enjoy his facial hair brushing against my skin, but the unusual sensation is a potent reminder of who I’m kissing. I love it.

When I release him so we can both catch our breath, I slide my nose against his bearded cheek and move my mouth to the shell of his small, curved ear. The dainty human feature is another reminder that I’m with Paul, not a faceless person in a sea of conquests. As much as I want to strip him bare and fuck him for cycles on end, I can’t toss him aside after.

I care about him. Much more than I realized. Esh’et , this is bad.

Paul shivers as my breath fans across his cheek. “What was that for?” he asks breathlessly.

I take a deep breath, trying to drag more of his scent into my lungs. “You walked in here shirtless and smelling like sex.” I trace along the dip of his spine, savoring the feel of his bare skin under my hand. “What other kind of welcome would you expect?”

He chuckles weakly. “That makes sense. Though I wasn’t trying to seduce you. I spilled something on my shirt.”

I pull back and look at his beautiful face, desire thrumming inside me, but I take a step back and try to shake it off mentally. “You don’t need to try to seduce me, Paul.”

“Th-thanks. Neither do you. But you already know how hot you are.” He laughs softly and looks away, rubbing the back of his neck.

I go over to the crate he’s returned with to distract myself, carding through the contents. It’s odd—the scent I thought was coming from Paul is actually coming from something inside here. I pick up his shirt to see what he could’ve found that would make me so intoxicated, and his eyes go wide.

“Wait! I can handle that.” Paul grabs the shirt from my hand and tosses it in the hamper. “Didn’t want you to get anything on yourself.” His skin is turning a deep red like it does when he’s especially flustered.

I cock a brow at him. “What exactly did you spill?”

“Oh, nothing dangerous.” He clears his throat and looks away. “Leilit, my sweet girl, I found some stuff for you!”

The flesstra perks up when she sees him, and makes a pleased snuffle when Paul picks her up and holds her against his chest.

I don’t blame her. I’d also like to be plastered against him like that.

“Wasn’t sure what supplies we needed for her, so I grabbed a bunch of things I hope will work until we can get stuff made specifically for flesstras.” There’s no judgment in Paul’s tone about the fact I dumped a flesstra on him with no means to take care of her. Stars, he’s sweet.

“I have food, a bed, a waste receptacle, and enrichment items being delivered to the ship before we disembark. But anything else you can think of that she might need, I’ll make sure she gets it.”

He smiles at me, a warm broad one that flashes his flat, pearly teeth. “You’re incredible. Thank you.” Paul strokes Leilit’s head and closes his eyes for a moment, clearly blissful with his new pet. It’s so adorable, it makes me want to give him more gifts. Knowing I’ve made him this happy is the best feeling in the galaxy.

When Paul’s eyes open, a small furrow forms between his brow. “Hold on. I thought you were low on credits. All of that together sounds expensive.”

I snort, thinking back on how easy it was to convince the vendor to give me the small critter and supplies for less than cost by telling them about my poor, sick human whose only wish was to have a flesstra to comfort him. I’d feel bad about conning them, but I doubt they got the animals through scrupulous means. “Don’t worry about it. It was negligible compared to what we need.”

My stomach clenches at the reminder of the large sum of credits we need to procure, and how now I have not one vulnerable being, but two, that I need to protect during whatever job we take to make that money.

The line between Paul’s thick brows deepens. “It’s that bad, huh?”

I give him a smile that is far more confident than I feel right now. “It’s more than I’d hoped, but I’ll figure it out. I have a contact that should be able to get us a higher paying job.”

He nods. “Good. I’m sure whatever the job is, you’ll be able to handle it.”

Paul’s confidence drapes over me like a warm, comforting blanket. However, for the first time in ages, there’s a flicker of worry that his trust might be misplaced.