9. Pearl
9
PEARL
W hen Pearl got home that evening, the lamps in the lounge and the hallway created a golden glow in the windows that she hadn’t come home to for quite some time. The cottage was warm with the presence of another human being and she could hear music playing somewhere inside. She wandered through the hallway, hung her coat on the hook and went through to the lounge. There was no sign of Ellie, but the fire was lit and the room felt like somebody else had been in there recently. Pearl enjoyed living alone and was not afraid of it, but knowing one of her loved ones was in the cottage was lovely.
She left the lounge and went through to the kitchen, enjoying the smells of coffee and toast that greeted her. Ellie wasn’t in there either and the back door was closed, so her granddaughter must be upstairs. Not wanting to startle Ellie, she called out a few times to let her know she was there, but there was no response, so she got out her phone and sent Ellie a text. Ellie replied immediately to say she was taking a bath.
Pearl made herself a cup of tea then sat in the lounge. At seventy-five, she was fit and healthy, but after a full day’s work she sometimes felt an ache deep in her bones and a tiredness she hadn’t experienced when she was younger. She tried to stay fit by doing yoga, some free weights and walking every day, but regardless of that, she was sometimes conscious of the fact that she wasn’t getting any younger. She sank onto the sofa and let herself relax; her mug of tea cradled between both hands.
She tilted her head as she tried to work out what Ellie was listening to. And then it became clear. She could hear the beautiful voice of Karen Carpenter as she sang mournfully about rainy days and Mondays. Pearl had always liked the Carpenters and played them regularly while Ellie was growing up, and it seemed that her granddaughter still liked to listen to the band. That was the thing with music — it didn’t matter how old you were, what decade you were born in, or what you had been through in your life, it could be timeless. Music brought people together, it comforted them when they were low, and it could lift them higher when they were feeling good. Pearl had always enjoyed music and over the years she’d listened through a variety of mediums. Back in the 1960s and ’70s she’d had her record player and listened to her favourites on vinyl. In the ’80s she had used vinyl and also cassette tapes then this progressed to audio CDs in the ‘90s when she was able to afford a CD player. As technology had advanced, she had moved to using apps on her phone that she listened to through portable speakers. When she reflected on it, the rapid changes were astonishing, and she was certain her husband would be astounded by modern technology such as smartphones, iPads, contactless payments, online shopping, and the convenience of purchasing items nowadays. He would have been very impressed, she knew, and she wished with all her heart that she could share these things with him. But then she could also imagine hearing his voice if he caught her browsing Etsy or another online retailer and spending money. Her husband had not liked to spend money, but she was the complete opposite. Pearl loved to shop, she loved to find bargains and beautiful things that she could bring into her home. She liked to avoid new things though, and preferred vintage, recycled and up-cycled, because it was better for the planet. The furniture in the café was up-cycled, as were the paintings that adorned the walls, the shelves that held the books, and even the floorboards were all reclaimed or up-cycled. It was, Pearl thought, one of the things that made the café such a pleasant place to be, such a cosy and homely environment. She also liked to buy second-hand books when she visited charity shops, although not wanting to take away sales from authors, she then bought a copy of the books for her e-reader so she was supporting the authors who needed to make a living too. Pearl believed that up-cycled, recycled and vintage goods were more interesting than brand new items because they had a history. Before they had come into her possession, they had been somewhere else, with someone else, serving a different purpose perhaps than they were now. And she liked to think that after her time, someone else would then take these things on and give them a whole new life. There was comfort in this just as in the passing of the seasons, because it meant that life went on, people went on, items went on, and there was continuity. Human beings were but a speck on the earth, a minuscule part of the universe, and while they were important to their loved ones, they were just a part of something far bigger. She was a part of something far more significant than one brief human life. Pearl would live on, through the energy she left behind and through her daughter and her granddaughter. Granted, she saw little of her daughter these days, so she wasn’t sure how much of a legacy she would leave there, but she was close to Ellie and knew that Ellie would remember her.
Hearing a noise, she looked towards the doorway and smiled when her granddaughter appeared, as if her thoughts about Ellie had conjured her.
‘Ellie darling,’ she said. ‘How are you now?’
‘Much better for some sleep and a bubble bath,’ Ellie replied as she towelled off her hair. ‘I really needed to catch up on some rest. I haven’t been sleeping great lately, and it was so nice to come home and to snuggle up in my old bed.’
‘You found the sheets easily enough, then?’ The bed hadn’t been made-up in the spare room, or rather Ellie’s room, because Ellie hadn’t been home in some time. Pearl hadn’t seen the point in leaving the sheets on the bed just to get dusty so she’d left the bed stripped and the sheets tidied away.
‘Yes, of course. Everything was in the airing cupboard... washed, ironed, smelling of sunny days and of lavender. I see you’ve still got the dried lavender bunches in there. Also, when I got the sheets out of the airing cupboard to make up the bed, they were warm, so I couldn’t wait to slip between them. I wasn’t particularly dirty because I showered this morning but I was feeling a bit stale from the journey. It’s funny how travelling and tiredness can make you feel that way.’
Pearl smiled at her granddaughter, enjoying listening to her while gazing at her in person. It was one thing being able to video call, but it was a whole other treat to see her granddaughter in the flesh and to have her staying under her roof once more.
‘Did you eat?’ she asked.
Ellie nodded. ‘I had the sandwich you made for me, which was delicious by the way, and I had the tea but I was still a bit peckish, so I had a look in the cupboards and found some chocolate biscuits.’ Ellie grinned mischievously. ‘Then some coffee and toast. I hope that was OK.’
‘Of course, it’s OK, darling! What’s mine is yours. It’s always been that way. Surely you know that?’
‘I do. Thank you, Gran... It’s so good to be home.’
‘It’s good to have you home. I have missed you, but I don’t like to put pressure on you by telling you that when you’re in London. I know you have a whole life there to live and the last thing I want is for you to be worrying about me missing you.’ Pearl’s vision blurred slightly, and she blinked hard. ‘It’s important that you feel happy and confident enough to head off into the world and to live your life without worrying about me or this place or anything else at all.’ She looked at her granddaughter and concern washed over her because Ellie had gone quite pale. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’
Ellie wrapped the towel around her neck, sucked in a shaky breath, and rubbed her cheeks. ‘My so-called successful life in London is actually not that at all. In fact, it’s very far from successful.’
‘Whatever has happened, darling?’ Pearl asked softly.
‘Gran, I’ll tell you, but I’m so worried you’ll be disappointed in me. I mean, I know I’ve told you over the years that things are going well and-and sometimes they have been going well... but-but more recently, everything seems to have gone wrong.’ Ellie’s bottom lip wobbled, making her look like a little girl and she rubbed her cheeks again.
‘Look darling, why don’t I make us a drink,’ Pearl said, placing her mug on the coffee table, ‘and then you can tell me all about it?’
‘That would be great, Gran.’ Ellie looked down at herself as if realising she was wearing her dressing gown and a towel. ‘I’ll just go and put my pyjamas on.’
‘You do that and I’m going to make us a gin and tonic. I think we both need it.’ Pearl stood up, picked up her mug and crossed the room, pausing to watch as Ellie climbed the stairs. ‘Whatever it is, Ellie, we can fix it. I promise you that. Nothing is too difficult to fix.’
Ellie sniffed and nodded. ‘Thanks, Gran. I don’t know what I’d do without you.’
As Pearl went to the kitchen, she said softly to herself, ‘I don’t know what I’d do without you, either, my darling girl.’