Chapter 40
40
HANNAH
I put on my power suit. I had two, but this one was my favorite. It fit right and it made me feel confident. Today, I needed to be confident. I needed to look like I was ready to kick ass.
I walked into the living room where Nikko was sitting on the couch flipping through channels.
He whistled low, looking me up and down. “Wow, you look like you’re about to go to war.”
I smoothed down my blazer. “I am. Sort of.”
We had been going over this, and with Nikko’s encouragement, I was finally ready to do it.
We were going to take the next step in our relationship.
I was terrified.
And excited. It was a strange feeling.
He stood up and came over, adjusting my collar slightly. “You’ve got this. Whatever happens, I’m here.”
I took a deep breath. “I know. That’s why I feel brave enough to do this.”
My heels clicked confidently against the floor as I grabbed my bag. This wasn’t just about confronting Clarke. This was about reclaiming my power, my narrative. And no matter what happened, I was going to walk out of that office with my head held high.
“Are you ready?” he asked.
“No.”
He laughed. “Yes, you are.”
I groaned. “I feel sick. I can’t believe I’m going to do this. I’m so scared.”
“What’s the worst that can happen?”
I took a deep breath. “I know. It’s just, I can’t believe I’m going to quit the job I’ve been busting my ass for.”
“You’re not quitting, you’re moving on. You’re moving forward. That’s what you do. You move forward. You stay in a job that isn’t going to give you the satisfaction you need and you’re going to get stale. You’re going to get bored. And you’ll end up hating it.”
“I know, I know,” I said. “I know you’re right. I’m ready.”
“I’ll drive you to work,” he said. “If you want, I’ll hang out in the lobby. You can call me if you need moral support.”
I smiled. “Thank you. I can handle it. I have to. I’m trying to be a boss bitch. I have to be able to quit on my own.”
We headed downstairs and he got behind the wheel.
“Give me some tips. How do I start the conversation?”
“Suck an egg, dipshit,” he said.
I couldn’t hold back my laugh. “I’m thinking I might want to be a little more professional than that.”
“How about kiss my ass, sir ,” he said.
“Very funny. I’ll thank him for the opportunity and then quit.”
“I suppose you could do it like that,” he said.
“I know it’s not quite as cool as telling him to fuck off, but I don’t want to completely blow up my professional reputation. I would like to get a job again one day.”
He pulled up outside the building. He reached over and grabbed my hand. “You’ve got this. You’re going to kill it. You tell him thanks for everything, but it’s time to move on. And I’ll be right here.”
“Thank you. I love you.”
“I love you,” he said. “Good luck.”
I felt giddy as I stepped into the elevator. The ride felt like an eternity. My heart raced, palms sweaty, but my spine was straight and my resolve firm. I knew exactly what I was going to say. No wavering. No apologizing.
I walked directly to Clarke’s office, nodding at the receptionist who looked surprised to see me so early. I heard shouting. The receptionist shook her head. “You don’t want to go in there,” she said.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
The receptionist picked up the phone and demanded building security rush to Clarke’s office. That was when I got a glimpse of the chaos. Stephen was shouting. He had a chair in his hand and looked like he was going to attack Clarke with it like they were in a wrestling ring.
I froze, watching the scene unfold. Stephen, the guy who had been handed my project, was completely unhinged. His face was red, veins bulging in his neck as he screamed at Clarke.
“You set me up!” Stephen yelled, brandishing the chair like a weapon. “You knew I couldn’t handle the New York client!”
Clarke stood behind his desk, hands raised in a placating gesture. “Stephen, calm down. We can discuss this?—”
But Stephen wasn’t listening. Two security guards rushed in, trying to wrestle the chair from his grip. I could hear the distant wail of sirens approaching.
I stood paralyzed, watching the meltdown. This was not how I had imagined my dramatic resignation would go. Security managed to get the chair out of Stephen’s hands and restrained him. I stepped out of the way just as Stephen laid eyes on me.
He glared at me, his face contorted with rage. “You!” Stephen spat, pointing at me. “This is all your fault!”
I took an instinctive step back, my heart racing. The security guards were still wrestling with Stephen, but his eyes were locked on me with an intensity that made my skin crawl.
“Suck an egg, dipshit,” I told him, glad I had that locked and loaded. The guy was scaring me but I wasn’t about to show it. Of course, looking brave was easier when armed guards were holding him back.
Clarke, who had been silent until now, finally spoke. “Call the police and get him the hell out of here,” he told the guards. “Hannah, I need to see you. Now.”
Stephen was struggling against the guards, but they dragged him away like he weighed nothing. His voice carried from down the hall. “You set me up, you pig fucker!”
I wondered if he meant me or my boss.
“Hannah!” Clarke said again with more urgency.
I stepped into his office and got a better glimpse of the chaos and destruction. Papers were strewn about like confetti. A potted plant looked like it had been thrown against the wall, shattering and getting dark potting soil everywhere. Clarke looked frazzled.
“Productive meeting?” I asked.
“He’s fired,” Clarke replied humorlessly. “Walk with me. I need a new cup of coffee. Stephen spit in this one.”
I followed him out of the office and down the hall. “What was his problem?” I asked.
Clarke shook his head. “I never should have given him the New York job. He couldn’t hack it. The clients were pissed at how he spoke to them. I swear, the man has the finesse of a monkey with a machine gun. And when I called him out on his crap, he lied and blamed the clients for being too sensitive. I fired him and he had the audacity to tell me I couldn’t.” He stopped in the breakroom and looked at me. “I need you there.”
I narrowed my eyes. “What? Where?”
“I need you in New York. You’re the right candidate. You have been right from the jump.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. He thought I was the right candidate? Pride washed over me. I was finally getting my chance. This was my moment. I can’t believe I’m going to get my shot!
“Can I count on you, Hannah?” Clarke asked.
I was already nodding. “Yes, absolutely you can, I just?—”
Nikko .
I was supposed to be up here quitting my job and moving to Miami to be with him. We had a dinner booked for this weekend to tell my friends. It would be a hard conversation, we agreed, but Miami isn’t that far, and I would still see them as much as possible. But this? Nikko wouldn’t want to go to New York. There was just no way.
But he’ll want me to take my shot, right?
“Hannah, I need an answer. We’re on the clock. Are you going to take the job?”
How could I turn it down? I was going to quit because I didn’t get the job and now I had it.
“Yes,” I heard myself say.
“Good. You’ll need to be in New York by the start of next week.”
My mouth dropped open. “Five days?”
“Stephen screwed this up,” he hissed. “I don’t have time for cold feet or second thoughts. Are you going to make it work or not?”
“I’ll make it work,” I said. “But, uh, I need to go. I can’t be in the office. I have things to take care of.”
“Of course,” he said. “Go.”
Five days from now. I was panicking. Five days? Okay. I can make that work. I have to make it work! This is the job I’ve been working for.
I hoped he would be happy for me. This was important. I wanted him but I also wanted this step in my career. I wanted my cake, and I was going to eat it too.
As soon as I slid into the passenger seat, Nikko cranked the radio, blasting Another One Bites the Dust . He grinned at me, drumming the steering wheel like we’d just won the lottery.
“Congratu-fucking-lations, baby!” he shouted over the music. “I’m so proud of you. Those ass wipes can shove it?—”
I turned the volume down, giving him a tight smile. “We need to talk.”
His drumming slowed, and he raised an eyebrow. “No Queen ? That bad, huh?”
“No, not bad,” I said quickly, though my voice wavered. “It’s just… complicated. ”
The realization hit him before I even said the words. His jaw tightened and he looked away. I could see him biting back his anger. “You didn’t quit, did you?”
I shook my head, avoiding his eyes. “Clarke offered me the New York job.”
The silence stretched out, the only sound the faint thrum of the radio in the background. Finally, he exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “Of course he did.”
“Nikko—”
“No, I mean, it makes sense. You’re the best person for the job.” His tone was calm, but his clenched jaw gave him away.
“I didn’t know what to do,” I admitted. “This is my dream, but then there’s us, and Miami, and?—”
“And you took it,” he finished for me, his voice quieter now.
“I said yes,” I confessed. “But I didn’t realize how fast everything would move. They need me there in five days.”
“Five days?” He laughed, but there was no humor in it. “That’s not much time to uproot your entire life.”
“I know.” I reached for his hand, but he didn’t take it. “I didn’t plan this, Nikko. I wasn’t expecting it.”
“And yet, here we are,” he said flatly.
I felt a lump rising in my throat, but I pushed through. “You always told me to chase my dreams. This is it. It’s everything I’ve worked for.”
“And what about us?” he asked, his eyes finally meeting mine.
“We’ll figure it out,” I said, my voice soft. “It’s not permanent. People do long distance all the time.”
He let out a bitter chuckle. “Long distance? Between Boise and Miami? Sure, that’s one thing. But Miami and New York? That’s an entirely different beast, Hannah. You’re going to have a new job with big responsibilities.”
“New York is closer than Boise,” I said.
“New York may as well be on the other side of the world.”
I swallowed hard. “Are you saying you don’t think we can handle it? ”
“I’m saying it’s going to be hard as hell, and I don’t know if you’ve thought it through.”
“I have thought it through!” I snapped, more defensively than I intended. “Do you think this was easy for me? Do you think I don’t feel like I’m ripping my life apart right now?”
He ran his hand through his hair again, his frustration evident. “I didn’t say it was easy. But damn, Hannah, you made this decision without even talking to me.”
“I didn’t have time!” I shot back. “It was chaos in there, and Clarke needed an answer on the spot.”
“And now I’m just supposed to what? Pack up and follow you to New York?”
“I’m not asking you to follow me,” I said firmly. “I’m asking you to support me.”
“And I do,” he said, his voice softer now. “I just wish I’d been part of the decision, that’s all.”
I reached for his hand again, and this time, he let me take it. “I get that. And I’m sorry. I panicked. I didn’t know how to say no.”
He sighed, squeezing my hand. “I don’t want to hold you back, Hannah. I want you to have everything you’ve worked for. I just don’t want to lose us in the process.”
“You won’t,” I said, my voice shaking. “We’ll figure it out. We always do.”
“Yeah,” he said softly. “We’ll figure it out.”
But the uncertainty in his eyes told me he wasn’t so sure. And, if I was honest with myself, neither was I.