Stealing a Kilted Heart (Temptation in Tartan #8)

Chapter 18

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

K nox stood in the middle of the dance floor alone, staring at the space Fia had only just occupied. The people around him stared at her retreating back as well and then threw some furtive glances at him, and he knew they were all thinking the same thing—how could anyone leave the laird of the clan like this alone on the dancefloor, especially a girl of such low status?

But that wasn’t what Knox was thinking. He didn’t care if Fia was a peasant girl. He didn’t care if everyone else thought she didn’t fit in the castle or in his life. Why should any of the girls with whom he had been presented in the past be any better in his eyes just because they were noble born? Fia had the kind of strength of character that was rare among people, and it was that which mattered to him; not her pedigree, not her lack of wealth or formal education, not even her resistance to this new way of life. All this time, he had been concerned about what other people would say if he pursued her, but that had only driven her away from him.

He was not going to make the same mistake again.

Rushing after her, Knox spilled out into the courtyard. It was dark there, the sky above an inky black, the stars covered by the thick clouds that had gathered over the castle. The only source of illumination were the torches that lined the castle walls, but they were not enough to bathe the entire courtyard in light, and so it took Knox a few moments for his eyes to adjust and see that Fia was quickly walking towards the gardens, her stride long and fast.

He should have known she would be heading there. Running to catch up to her, Knox felt his shoes sink into the soft, damp ground. The night smelled of petrichor from the rain that had fallen that afternoon, and he knew there was a storm approaching, the air chilling his cheeks as he ran.

He only came to a halt when he saw Fia sitting on a bench by the gardens. There, the air was more fragrant, saturated with the scent of flowers and herbs, and she took a deep breath, her chest rising and falling slowly as Knox watched her.

She hadn’t seen him. For a moment, he was reluctant to approach her, to intrude in her moment of calm, but then he couldn’t stop himself. He had to talk to her. He had to make her understand that no matter what anyone else said, she was the most precious thing to him.

When he joined her on the bench, Fia didn’t give him any sign of acknowledgement, which made him wonder if perhaps she had, in fact, noticed him but had refrained from showing it in the hopes that he would leave her alone. Now that he was there, he wasn’t sure what to say to her.

What did one say in such a situation? With how she had been treating him, he didn’t even know if she wanted to listen to what he had to say not. Sometimes, Knox thought she had to be feeling the same for him as he did for her, but other times he couldn’t help but wonder if he had imagined it all, if he had fallen for her so suddenly and so completely that he had overlooked all the signs and had taken her kindness and politeness as something more than it was.

But no, he couldn’t be this mistaken. He knew Fia wanted him just as much as he wanted her. He knew it in his bones and no matter how much she denied it, he knew it to be true.

In the end, he didn’t have to be the one to speak. Fia spoke first, her voice wavering with uncertainty.

“Forgive me fer bein’ so blunt, me laird, but what is it that ye seek from me?” she asked, her gaze glued to the far wall. No matter how Knox angled himself, she refused to meet his gaze. “I’m naethin’ but a healer. I’m a peasant lass an’ that is what I will always be. I’m far beneath yer station an’ askin’ me tae dance in front o’ all those people… ye can only imagine what they will be sayin’ about me now.”

It was true that people talked, as much as Knox hated to admit it. Even now that he was gone from the room, whispers were bound to surface, his guests wondering why he had run after her and why she had fled in the first place. He had the luxury to not care about any of those whispers or whatever rumors would end up spreading around the castle. But Fia didn’t. Knox could and would protect her from it all. He would take the blame for everything; he could request that his people and his staff stop talking about her behind her back. He would do anything to have her, sparing no one who got in his way.

“It daesnae matter tae me,” he told her, reaching for her hand and grabbing it tightly between his. It was then that Fia finally turned to look at him, her eyes wide at the sudden burst of passion he had shown. He was more reserved than this usually; he had been trained to keep his composure at all times, after all, but with Fia around him, he found that he could hardly control himself and his emotions. They all poured out of him as though a dam had burst inside him, leaving every thought, every feeling to rush out of him unbridled and unprotected. “It daesnae and it never did. Why should I care what anyone else thinks? All I care about is ye.”

He had hardly finished his sentence before he surged forward and kissed Fia, pulling her close, his lips pressing firmly against hers. At first, she froze and Knox feared she would push him away and reject him, insisting that they couldn’t be together, but then she let out a soft sigh, sagging in his arms.

And he knew he finally had her.

The last thing Fia had expected was that kiss, which shook her to her core. She had an entire speech prepared for the laird, to try and explain to him why he should care about what others said and to point out that they could never truly be together. Not only had she lost all faith in her plan after meeting the laird’s council, as she couldn’t bring herself to believe that they would ever allow a marriage between the two of them, but she had also abandoned the entire thought, knowing such a marriage would be based on lies and deception and revenge. It wasn’t what Fia wanted for him. Despite everything, she had begun to fall for him and she knew that Laird Stuart didn’t deserve such treatment.

And she didn’t deserve a man as kind and trusting as him.

When he kissed her, though, her attempt to convince herself to pull back from him was feeble at best. The way he kissed her, the way he held her through it all was intoxicating, the brush of his lips making the entire world spin around her. Never before had she felt desire like this; not for Callum nor for anyone else. When Callum had kissed her the first time, she had been filled with joy at being chosen by someone like him, but now that feeling paled in comparison to the sheer passion and need of the kiss she shared with Knox.

It was as though his lips were the flint to the fire that was ignited within her, liquid fire rushing through her veins with every touch. Knox devoured her mouth like a starving man, giving her no chance to breathe or to think about what she was doing.

It was only when she felt the hard press of his length against her thigh as he moved closer that Fia finally convinced herself to pull back from him, pushing a hand into his chest when he tried to follow. For a moment, she was taken by the sight of him like that —his dark hair mussed by her hands, his eyes wild, shining with arousal, his lips slick and reddened. It was easy, tempting, to imagine him in the throes of passion, taking Fia as he so clearly wished, but she had put a stop to it.

No man had ever touched her and no one would until she was married. She wasn’t going to change her mind, not even for the laird.

“I… I cannae,” she said. “I’ve never?—”

Knox tilted his head to the side for a moment, as if confused. It took him a short while to realize what it was Fia was trying to tell him, and the surprise at the realization was written plainly on his handsome features, much to Fia’s chagrin.

“Did ye think I would be… experienced?” she asked. Was that why he wanted her so much? Was she nothing more than another body to him, someone he could use to pleasure himself?

“I didnae—” Knox said, but then seemed to be at a loss for words. Fia stared at him in shock, her mouth hanging slightly open, but he was quick to continue even as he stammered in his attempt to find the right words. “I didnae mean tae offend ye! Or tae assume! I only thought…”

“Ye only thought that because girls who are nae noble often dae it, I would too,” she mumbled. She supposed he had a point; Callum had told her plenty of times that every girl in the village had relations with men and she was the only one who was keeping herself pure as if she was a noble-born. But Fia had long since made up her mind to save herself for her husband.

“It is only natural,” said Laird Stuart, leaning a little closer even as he pulled his hips away from her so that his manhood wasn’t pressing into her thigh. It was a gesture that didn’t pass unnoticed, and Fia was grateful for it. “But I understand, and if it isnae somethin’ ye want, then I willnae even consider it.”

Relief washed over Fia then. There was no mockery in the laird’s voice nor did she detect any sign of him lying. He was the perfect gentleman—much more so than Callum had ever been. And even though she wouldn’t consider laying with him, she was more than willing to kiss him.

With a hand on the back of his neck, Fia pulled him close once more, this time initiating the kiss. At the first contact between their lips, Knox moaned softly, sending another wave of heat through Fia’s body. It was difficult to remember why she was saving herself when someone like the laird was so willing to share the night with her. She could imagine all of his moans, his sighs, the way he would look at her as he would sink deep inside her. She could imagine the way he would her kiss all over her body, touching her where she had only dared to touch herself once or twice in her life.

She didn’t realize that as they kissed and as she imagined all those things, she was moving restlessly against the laird, trying to get some sort of relief, quiet moans tumbling from her lips. It wasn’t until the laird chuckled against her lips and pulled back just enough to look at her that she noticed what she was doing, embarrassment flooding through her and turning her cheeks a bright red.

“Ye ken… there are other ways fer me tae bring ye pleasure without ruinin’ ye?” he asked, his hand coming up to cradle her cheek. Fia leaned into the touch, her breath hitching as she met his heated gaze. “Dae ye want that? Dae ye want me tae touch ye?”

Fia had heard of such ways but had never given them much thought. Now, though, she couldn’t get them out of her mind. Not only was she curious to see what it would feel like to be touched by a man, but her need for him threatened to overwhelm her and she couldn’t resist the idea of him bringing her this pleasure.

Quietly, she nodded and Knox groaned as he leaned in for another kiss, the hand that cradled her cheek now travelling slowly down her body—first to brush against her neck, then to grab onto her breast, his fingers closing around the small swell of it, and then even lower, down her stomach and finally under her dress. The laird’s fingers skimmed over her calf, her thigh, and then, just as he pulled her legs apart with his free hand, brushed against her folds.

Fia gasped, her entire body twitching at that first touch. It was barely there, nothing more than a teasing slide of his fingers over her sensitive skin, but it was enough to stoke the flames of her desire and make her want more.

“Me laird?—”

“Say me name,” he said as he grabbed her and hauled her onto his lap, the movement so sudden she had to suppress a shriek. With her back against his chest and his arm wrapped tightly around her waist as his hand worked between her legs, there was nowhere for Fia to go. “Say it.”

“Knox,” Fia gasped, letting her head fall back against his shoulder. Knox kissed her, swallowing up her moans as he gathered the wetness from her core and spread it around her folds, fingers teasing the sensitive spot over her opening. It was unlike anything she had experienced before. It was nothing like the hesitant, faltering touch of her own hand when curiosity had gotten the better of her. Knox worked her expertly, his touch gentle yet firm, his fingers exploring every inch of her.

“Dae ye ken how long I’ve been thinkin’ about ye?” he asked, whispering in her ear. “Spreadin’ ye on me bed, kissin’ ye, tastin’ ye… I bet ye taste like heaven itself.”

Fia groaned, half in arousal and half in embarrassment. She didn’t know how Knox could appear so composed while telling her such things; though perhaps, if she judged by his shallow breaths, he wasn’t composed at all.

“I wish I could see ye,” he said, just as he pushed the tip of a finger inside her, her hand flying up to stifle a cry of pleasure. “I wish I could see all o’ ye. Ye’re so bonnie, Fia… ye have nae idea.”

Those words, combined with the relentless attention from his hand, were enough to push Fia past her peak, her orgasm slamming into her like a wave. She could hardly suppress the shout of his name as she convulsed in his lap, her core throbbing with a pleasure that spread all over her body, to the tips of her fingers. It was a relief the likes of which Fia had never known and her body sagged immediately in Knox’s grip as he pleasured her through her zenith, until his touch was too much for her to bear on her oversensitive flesh.

Panting against him, Fia stared at the dark sky above her with glassy eyes, hardly registering anything other than the jolts of pleasure that still hummed through her body and the rushed, synchronized rhythm of their breaths. She could have never predicted that a man’s touch could feel so good. She could have never thought that by finally giving in to her desire, she would ensnare herself.

How could she ever live without this now? How could she go on with her life, knowing she could be this close to Knox and not allowing herself to give him anything more than a polite, formal greeting?

It had been a mistake to allow this. Now that she knew his touch, she would always crave it.

Knox, oblivious to her inner conflict, pressed kiss after kiss to her neck and shoulder and Fia didn’t have the heart to push him away. The more they stayed like that, though, the shallower her breath became, panic gripping her.

It was all her fault. She was the one who had put herself in this situation, but now she didn’t know how to get herself out of it.

Just as she was about to pull herself away from Knox, though, her panic threatening to bubble over, three bells in quick succession rang throughout the castle grounds. Knox stood abruptly, trying to steady her even as he jostled her off him, and stared at the gates, his chest heaving with every breath he took.

It wasn’t a bell she had heard before, but judging by the way Knox had paled, his face turning a sickly shade of white as though all the blood had drained from it, it couldn’t be good. And when he turned around to look at her, all her worst fears were confirmed.

“There’s an attack,” he said. “Ye must hide.”