16. Holden
Chapter 16
Holden
Day 455 without you: I heard you on the radio for the first time today, and I wish I could tell you how proud I am of you.
“ D ude, are we doing this or what?” Archer bumps his shoulder into mine while Olivia starts another song. “Well, fuck me. Never mind.”
I chuckle because I know exactly what he means. Getting enough of Olivia’s singing in this intimate setting is impossible. With Evie accompanying her on the piano, her raw voice cascades through the large room with effortless beauty. She’s magnetic, her voice perfectly portraying the emotions and vibes of each song, going from light and breathy to full and vibrant in the blink of an eye. Her range is imposing, and her robust and velvety voice wraps around everyone in the audience.
And to think I’ve missed out on this before because I avoided the Fox Hideout every time I knew the two women would be here. I thought it would make things easier for all of us.
The music picks up momentum, and I belatedly realize what she’s singing. Her first single. My song . With her eyes closed and one hand loosely placed on the black piano, she presses her other one against her chest as if she’s trying to keep it from breaking open.
She builds up to the chorus, and I swallow, knowing exactly what comes next. Her voice rings out loud and strong as she sings, “No matter how much I hate you, I’d hate it more if I’d never met you.”
Her eyes open, her glassy gaze immediately finding mine, repeating the last line. This time, it’s almost a whisper, her voice breaking, so full of sorrow and despair my chest clenches, crushed in a vise. My throat tightens painfully, not letting up until she averts her gaze.
The suffocating pressure in my chest doesn’t ease, and I absentmindedly rub at it with my fist. Olivia’s songwriting and performance are some of the rare times she allows her emotions to surface. To actually feel. Afterward, she shuts down again. She was the same when we first met. An impenetrable vault. Like someone had crushed her spirit and forbidden her from being herself.
With every passing week, she opened up to me a bit more. She became a little louder, a little more opinionated. Unrestrained. Happy. Every meal we shared, every conversation we had, and every movie marathon we did broke down the walls between us some more. Now, I’m afraid I don’t even have access to the building where the vault is.
Archer blows out a breath beside me. “Are you sure you don’t want to tell her?”
My rib cage expands on a deep inhale. Shit. I’ve thought about it so many times. What if she won’t react badly to what happened? I doubt she’d be happy with what I did, but maybe she wouldn’t respond as horribly as I’ve always imagined she would?
Are you willing to take the risk of her shunning you altogether?
It takes every ounce of my willpower to tear my gaze away from her and focus on Archer. “Let’s check out what you found.”
He pinches his lips together and leads me into the office Phoenix and I share. Archer’s computer is waiting for us on the conference table.
He logs in and pulls up several pictures on his screen. “So I double-checked the messages O’Neal sent, and I don’t blame the guy for thinking he was talking to Olivia. Whoever catfished him said she opened a second account since her team had access to her main one. He questioned her at first, but then she sent him selfies and other candids from her life that weren’t anywhere online, and he believed it was truly her. I verified his account, but the Olivia account was a dead end. Untraceable.”
“You couldn’t trace it at all?”
He types away on his computer and points at some code. “There, dead end. My guess is a burner phone and public Wi-Fi, which can sometimes be traced back, but then the location is so widely used, it makes it hard to pinpoint where or who was using it. It’s the same method used for the flower delivery and the envelope from the courier.”
“Shit.” I tilt my head back and clasp my hands behind my head. “Why does all of this feel like some fucked-up déjà vu?”
“I know what you mean, but we’ll find the asshole. There are only so many ways to stay hidden and untraceable, so hopefully, he’ll make a mistake soon, and we can catch him.”
A headache slowly blooms behind my temples, and I curse the bad luck that seems to follow us around. Maybe it’s karma for what I’ve done in the past, collecting its price.
The chair squeaks when Archer leans back, flipping a pen back and forth between his fingers. “You’re sure we have no leads whatsoever?”
I shake my head. “Nothing.”
“Have you talked to Olivia about this? Maybe she has an idea who could be behind it?”
The look I give him is answer enough.
He only shrugs. “I can talk to her if you don’t want to.”
“It’s not that.”
“Well, what is it then?”
“If I ask her questions, she’ll want to ask some in return. A truth for a truth. A dare for a dare.”
The corner of his mouth lifts. “I forgot we used to play that all the time back then. I’m guessing you guys did too?”
“Yup. It kind of became our thing.”
He expels a harsh breath. “Well, sorry, bro, but it’s either you or me. We need some answers before this asshole makes his next move and something terrible happens.”
“Luke.”
He raises his eyebrows. “We can’t know for sure the guy is behind that, so let’s catch this fucker. We don’t want things to escalate to the next stage, especially with Olivia being the main target.” After a pause, he adds, “We know things always escalate.”
He’s right. Of course he is. We’ve seen it over and over with our security business, and although Archer was working his computer skills on the down-low when everything happened with Phoenix and Evie, we both had first-row seats to that shitshow fucking us over big time.
“What if . . .” The thought of something similar repeating itself, but this time with Olivia as the main focus, has panic swelling up inside me. My lungs cinch tightly, not letting enough air in.
Archer appears in front of me, taking my face in his hands. “Listen to me, H. Nothing will happen to her. We’ll make sure of it. You’ll stay glued to her side while I do my best behind the scenes. The entire team is there to help, and we’ll keep her appearances to a minimum. If she has to go somewhere, we’ll up the security. She’s one of us, and we’ll take care of each other. Tell me you hear me.”
My lungs expand with a deep intake of air, and I nod.
“Have you talked to her about moving?”
I nod. “I’ve mentioned it.”
“Good. Maybe ask her again.” He tightens his grip on me, but I welcome the slight discomfort to pull me all the way out of this darkness I just fell into.
His stare is intense. “And see if she might have a clue about what’s going on. But remember, this is not a game, Hold. If you want her, work for it. Tell her what happened and beg for her forgiveness if necessary. But don’t play with her.”
At that, I slap his hands away. “I’m not playing with her.”
He chuckles. “I know you’re not doing it on purpose. Even a blind man would know you have the hots for your wife.”
This time, I roll my eyes. “I thought you said it’s not a game.”
His grin is almost evil. “Not for you and your songbird. You and I will never be done with the games.”
I walk to the mini fridge and grab some water. “I cannot wait until you find someone to kick the smug right out of you. Trust me, I will enjoy every second of it.”
He mumbles something that sounds like, “I wish,” but when I ask him what he said, he only shrugs and says, “We’ll see.”
The words are filled with his usual cockiness, but his smile is looking a bit sadder.
Loud cheers filter through the closed office door, and my feet move of their own accord.
Archer does the same, pressing a hand against the door before I can open it. “Please talk to her, okay? Maybe she’ll surprise you by not running for the hills the way you think she will. You won’t know until you give her a chance.”
My only response is a grunt. This is why I will never drink tequila again with Archer. Apparently, I spill my deepest secrets.
But as usual, he enjoys pushing me and continues, “I’ll go over her team’s background again. There’s no sure sign this is an inside job, but we can’t rule it out. Maybe something Olivia knows will help shed some light on the situation.”
My patience is dwindling quickly, and I grind my teeth. Archer must hear it because he backs off and opens the door for us.
Together, we head back to the large common room where most of the teens are lounging on oversized bean bags, the awe over having Olivia in their midst clear on their mesmerized faces.
Olivia still stands next to the piano, and when she spots us, it’s impossible to miss how the corners of her mouth lift. Is the smile intentional or just muscle memory?
Her gaze shifts away, and she finishes the upbeat song. Evie takes her hands off the piano keys to clap with a massive smile. At first, I think she just claps for Olivia, but everyone else also continues clapping and cheering, and I realize it’s because Monica is joining the women.
The three of them speak quietly together until Evie returns to the piano, her fingers nimbly flying over the keys, with first Olivia singing and then Monica chiming in too. Their voices harmonize beautifully, like they were meant to sing together and have done so for a while.
“Hot damn, I’ve got goosebumps.” Archer holds out his arm as proof.
We listen to the trio perform a few songs, and it doesn’t escape my notice that Olivia lets Monica sing more and more on her own with each song.
The eighteen-year-old is entirely in her element, and no one dares to make a sound. She sings her heart out with her eyes closed and one hand on the side of the piano.
I still remember the day she walked into the lobby last year, her face and half of her body bloody and bruised after her father had one of his many drunken anger spells. The doctor we use said Monica was lucky to get out when she did. The broken ribs and other injuries she suffered weren’t the first ones, nor would they have probably been the last had she not found us.
Some parents deserve a second chance. Some don’t. And I want to save as many of those teenagers who need help to survive. Thankfully, we have the funds to keep building more and more Fox Hideouts.
We stay for a few more hours, having dinner with the twenty-three teens we currently house here. Although we get regular reports from the staff, we try to check in with as many of them as possible to know what’s going on and what’s needed. Since it’s easy for things to fall through the cracks, the more people who keep an eye on them, the better.
Phoenix joins us halfway through dinner, ready to take Evie back home.
Olivia looks tired but happy on our drive back to the penthouse. Once we’re in the elevator, she faces me. “I want to jump in the shower first, but afterward, can we talk?”
“Sure.”
Her calm demeanor should assure me, right?
Instead, my head is spinning, and my thoughts are turning my stomach into a knot of panic and guilt, all while my heart is racing with nerves and fear.
What am I going to tell her if she asks why I left? Am I really going to tell her the truth?