Chapter 53
A loud ringtone burst into life and reluctantly we broke apart. I retrieved my phone from my rear pocket, looked at the name, rolled my eyes and pressed accept, mouthing that I had to take the call. Seamus nodded and took a seat. I knew that whatever we had could wait and that we had our whole lives ahead of us. In that moment, my heart felt totally and utterly full.
‘Jo, it’s Michael.’
‘Yes, I know it’s you, Michael. Your name comes up on the phone. Remember?’
‘Ah yes, I forgot that. I wanted to talk to you about contesting the will. The solicitor said…’
‘I’m going to stop you there, Michael.’ I looked up at Seamus and he winked at me. My tummy flipped and I realised how very much in love with him I was and had been for a while. I smiled at the thought. ‘I’ve got a story to tell you,’ I said to Michael, ‘but not right now. I have a carnival to go to. With Seamus.’
Seamus and I spent a wonderful afternoon at the carnival, where we proudly held hands all afternoon and were very much at ease with our public displays of affection. We bumped into Bill outside the lifeboat station who said that it was about time we got together. And that he’d known that very first day he’d met me that his son and I would be perfect for each other.
While the carnival was still in full swing, and the locals were enjoying the late-afternoon sun, we snuck away and came back to my cottage and proved exactly how much we meant to each other. Despite me being totally petrified at being naked in front of someone new, making love with Seamus was mind-blowing. We gelled together as we did in every other way and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. Afterwards, we dressed and sat on the terrace wrapped up in blankets, watching the stars shimmering in the inky-blue crystal-clear night sky.
‘Look!’ Seamus pointed up. ‘A shooting star. It must be our lucky night.’
‘It might be yours again later, sunshine, if you’re up to the task.’ I wasn’t quite sure where this brazen, husky voice had come from but it made me smile.
‘Try me!’
Just as he kissed me once more and I melted against him, Emma and Michelle came round the corner arm in arm, giggling, slightly tipsy. As Seamus nipped inside and brought out a bottle of brandy and four glasses, I thought back on my life over the last six months and how much things had changed since I’d moved to Sandpiper Shore. The future was bright.
Emma was glowing, full of passion for her new friendship group project. Michelle was excitable for the possibilities with the hot doctor. Who knew whether things would work out or not for any of us but I knew now that it was about the journey along the way. That was the exciting part. If the past hadn’t happened then none of us would be where we were today. Life was not about looking back on what was in the past but full of the here and now, and what the future might hold.
As I looked up at Tessa’s house on the hill, I realised how much I was looking forward to spending time getting to know the woman who gave birth to me as well as learning more about my father. And in the final chapter of her life, I would be someone that she could rely on and learn to love too. As the myriad-coloured fireworks exploded over the sea, my bursting heart had never felt more grateful.
As I looked across at the man by my side and reached for his hand, I realised this was my present, and that my future would have this wonderful man and I had to be thankful for all that would be.
‘A toast,’ I declared. ‘To us!’
The four of us clinked glasses and sipped at our drinks, each in our own private thoughts.
Maybe we were all lonely in some way and looking for something to make us feel whole. However, loneliness isn’t about how many friends you have or don’t have or how many people are in the room or not. It’s about learning to be alone and still be content. It’s about making peace with yourself and not relying on another person to complete you. When you dig deep, there is only one person who can stop the loneliness and that’s you. It’s about taking back your power and saving yourself.
And if in the end you do find someone extra special whom you get to go on adventures with, or someone who will just do nothing with you, someone who will support you in anything you choose to do, who will kiss you when you are least expecting it, hold your hand for no reason, make you laugh like never before, and make your heart skip a beat from time to time, then that’s just a big, beautiful bonus.
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