The Heartbreak Hotel (Sandy Springs #1)

Chapter Twenty-Three

Ella

Under the deep indigo sky, Riley wrapped her strong, warm arms around Ella. The clear night had a slight bite to it, but the comfort seeping from Riley’s body chased it away as they lay together in the hammock. They swayed gently from side to side, Ella’s head against Riley’s chest, Riley’s legs snug around Ella’s torso, wrapped tight in their own cocoon.

The moonlight reflected off Ziggy’s collar as he curled into a ball on Ella’s legs. He’d tucked his head under himself, making him appear headless. His gentle snores said otherwise. Endless stars pierced the sky, white lights twinkling, glowing brighter with every glance. Ella’s gaze passed over the million dots, more appearing with every breath. She’d never seen so many.

She sunk further into the heat of Riley’s body and let out a sigh.

“I told you,” Riley whispered, her breath tickling Ella’s cheek. “There’s nothing quite like the stars out here.”

Ella yawned, catching the movement with the back of her hand. “If I’m a walking zombie at the fire ceremony later, though, I’m blaming you.”

Riley’s chuckle vibrated through her, and Ella smiled, wiggling so she could lay her ear against Riley’s chest and listen to the soft thrum of her heartbeat. Ziggy flopped over, so Ella scooped him with her arm to stop him from falling out of the hammock.

“Are you nervous?” Riley asked, her voice a low rumble.

“Yeah.” Ella chased the muscle of Riley’s shoulder with her free hand, her fingertips grazing down to where Riley’s own hand rested across her waist. She was anxious about the fire ceremony, the end of all of this…receiving her totem. But she was most nervous about her next steps with Riley. What if Senhor Arenoso ma de her change her mind? Winnie’s surprise arrival had put her conversation with Riley on the back burner, but now it pushed to the front, demanding attention.

“Wanna talk about it?” Riley’s breath danced away into the night, and Ella turned back to the sky, noting the faint orange light peering over the horizon. The light bled upwards, hiding the stars beneath the blur of colour. Ella’s focus was caught somewhere above them, and Riley leaned forward to nuzzle her lips into her neck, rocking the hammock. “Talk to me.”

Ella squirmed under her touch and let out a giggle that was loud in the quiet night. She sucked in a breath and exhaled, steadying herself. “What if you change your mind?”

“Ella.” Her voice was stern, possessive, strong enough to lift the hairs over Ella’s arms. “I want you. I’d follow you anywhere. Unless you didn’t want me to.” There was a heavy silence. “Do you want me to?”

“Of course I do.” She threaded her fingers through Riley’s. “It’s just a little hard to believe sometimes.”

“Do you need me to show you just how badly I want you, right here in this hammock?” Her warm lips found Ella’s neck, and she squealed. “We might scar Ziggy for life, but I’ll do it. Try me.”

Ella laughed and bit her lip, unable to stop the grin spreading across her face. “But what are we going to do? What about the big baby?” She looked down at Ziggy, sleeping peacefully in the crook of her arm.

“He’s my son. He comes with me. ”

She traced over Riley’s knuckles. “And where will you both go?”

“I’m sure there are hotels in England while I find my feet. I’ve got my savings.” She squeezed her arms around her tighter, planting a kiss on her temple. “We’ve got time to figure it out. There’s no rush.”

Ella pressed back into her, feeling her skin, grounding herself. Then she spoke the words she’d been afraid to air. “What if it all changes?”

“It will change.”

Oh.

“Nothing can stay the same forever, Ells. It’s not how the world works. We’re always changing, evolving, growing, regenerating. The earth never stops turning. The sun always rises. No matter what.” Her smooth hand found Ella’s cheek, and she turned it towards her. “Time is a funny thing. I’ve felt more myself these few weeks with you than I have in three years. If we didn’t embrace change, we’d just be stuck. We’d never see the starry skies or the beautiful sunrises.” She grinned, dimples forming in her cheeks, and lifted Ella’s chin. “We’d never fall for the fiery redhead.”

Ella’s heart squeezed. “You’ve fallen for me?”

“Of course I have, you eejit.” She kissed her, soft and slow, pulling a moan from deep in Ella’s throat. When they parted, both breathless and panting, she cupped her face. “I think I fell for you when I pulled you out of that bramble bush the first time I saw you. You stepped onto the island, and my whole world shifted. Bam. ”

Ella kissed her again, struggling to find the words to explain how she was feeling. The hammock rocked with their movement, and Ziggy meowed, swatting Ella’s cheek with his paw.

They laughed, and Riley tightened her grip around Ella, keeping them warm and safe in their own little world. The sun burned bright ahead of them, deep orange and pink hues painting the sky with the promise of new possibilities. The promise of change.

Ella blew out a breath, finding a new sense of determination as she witnessed the stars fade into the awakening dawn. She could do this. She was ready.

* * *

Nerves coiled in Ella’s belly as she took in her reflection. The same brown eyes observed her, but so much about her felt changed. Her long red hair, which she’d dressed half up, half down, in a way that elongated her neck and showed off her cheekbones, shone under the bright lights of her cabin. The marks from Riley were barely visible underneath the makeup, but she traced them with her fingertips anyway. She smiled, watching the lines form in her sun-kissed skin.

She swivelled, making sure there was no toilet paper or any ugly big knickers attached somewhere they shouldn’t be, and then there was a knock at the door.

“Come in,” she called, openly admiring the long forest-green dress that, to quote Winnie, fit her like a motherfucking glove. Winnie had trashed her original choice of outfits, deeming none of them worthy of her graduation, and so they’d visited the market, finding this long-sleeved dress that caressed her curves and exposed just enough of her chest. The material was embroidered with red, orange, and yellow flowers, reminding her of the wildflowers on the island, and she beamed as it glided across her thighs and hips.

She couldn’t wait for Riley to see it.

“Wowsers!” Pauline gasped, standing in the doorway in a red-and-white strappy dress and a red fascinator. “If only I were a few years younger, I’d be over you like a rash.”

Ella snorted, laughter bubbling in her chest. “A few years? More like a few decades.” She turned to Pauline with a wink, noting her soft but not-quite-matching eyeshadow and lipstick. She let out a whistle. “You on the prowl tonight?”

Pauline giggled. “Who knows what might happen if Marco Marcos is willing?”

The image of the hairiest man in existence and her favourite divorcee in a compromising position on his office chair flashed before Ella’s eyelids. She blinked it away. “Whatever tickles your pickle, bestie. You ready?”

Pauline nodded, holding out her arm, and Ella linked it, pulling the door shut behind them.

They walked to the courtyard as the sun sank. The sky was pulled into a deep purple hue, and streaks of white cast heavenly glows around the clouds. Ella squeezed Pauline’s arm tighter as they descended the path, anticipation building with every step. A weight pressed on her, all the expectations and fears and promises making her drag her feet.

Acoustic music carried its way up the hillside, the strings and clapping matching the rhythm of Ella’s heartbeat. Then she saw the courtyard, and her face lit up.

Huge garlands with pink, orange, and blue flowers decorated the entryway, covering the buildings and dangling from the wooden beams. Torches brightened the stone floor, casting warm light and shadows over the people gathered, who were clapping their hands to the lively beat.

A large stone firepit took centre stage, its two rocks curling around the firewood like a pair of grey snakes. The seating was formed from beautifully carved logs ringed around the fire, each one with a basket stacked on either side, filled with bundles of plants, herbs, and flowers.

Strangers congratulated Ella and Pauline as they passed, encouraging them to go stand at the front by the fountain, where the other people on their course waited. Ella scanned the crowd for Riley or Winnie, but the faces were hard to make out in the sparse light of the flickering flames.

Senhor Arenoso stood with his arms wide, the moonlight bright behind him. A large, red-and-black beaded headpiece sat atop his head, white and grey feathers covering the front, with two tufts on either side that Ella realised were the ears of an owl.

He slowly brought his palms together, and the music and clapping fell into a silence that echoed in the space. Pauline and Ella were the last to arrive. It was time to begin.

“Welcome,” he boomed, his gaze falling across the group. He gave them a wide, gleaming smile. “And thank you for joining us as we celebrate the crossing of our latest group on the Sandy Springs course and award them with their spirit totems.

“Life is a powerful, precious gift. It can be easy to forget this as we’re swept up in the everyday, but we must reconnect with our roots, with nature—smell the fresh air, listen to the earth, feel the textures, taste the rain. We need to give thanks for what has been, let go of what no longer serves us, and ask for blessing for what is to come.” His grin grew wider, flames flickering in his dark brown eyes. “So join me as we light the ceremonial fire.”

He led the way through the parted crowd, and they followed, circling around the firepit. Ella’s heart raced, searching for Riley in a gap in the crowd, but she couldn’t see her among all the commotion.

Senhor Arenoso bowed as he was handed a flaming torch from one of the teenage boys.

“Fire is cleansing,” he announced, his voice carrying over the courtyard. “It clears the old and makes way for the new.” He commanded each of them with his gaze, his words echoing in Ella’s chest. “When the fire is alight, I invite each of you to give a gift to the flames. A symbol of your new regeneration as you take the next steps on your path. Some people make a wish. Others state what they’d like to leave behind. Ultimately, you can take and create your own meanings, forge your own purpose, and embrace the night for all that it is. Celebrate your journey with family and friends.” He raised the torch high above his head and let out a joyful laugh. “Celebrate life!”

He lowered the torch to the base of the fire, and bright flames burst skywards, drawing a collective gasp from the crowd. Enthusiastic applause followed, cheers and whoops rising above the sound of the growing fire.

Ella’s eye was drawn to one particularly loud voice, and she smiled when she recognised Winnie. She’d cupped her mouth, tilting her head back to shout a high-pitched “woo” that turned more heads. Ella’s heart swelled with love for her. Even though her decision to come out here probably had a little to do with the lovely weather and the promise of sea, sand, and sex, Ella was so grateful to have a best friend like her. Without her, none of this would’ve happened.

Her group lined up to give their offerings to the flames, each admission bringing another round of applause as they each took their seat by the fire. As they shuffled closer, the orange and yellow light coating every wall and making the shadows dance around them, Ella’s brain short-circuited. What should she wish for? What should she leave behind?

There were too many things. They were piled on top of one another, fighting for space and overcrowding her thoughts like demanding toddlers. She could wish for Maeve’s sleek suit collection to catch fire or Annabelle’s hair to fall out, but she no longer felt the tangle of sadness in her stomach at the thought of them. In stark contrast, she actually— maybe— wanted them to be happy. What was the point in all the suffering otherwise?

Hmm. Maybe Winnie’s right, and they are spiking the water here.

It’d taken her a little bit of time, but she’d done as Senhor Arenoso asked and surrendered to the course. It had meant hearing things she didn’t want to listen to. Not only facing them but digging deeper into why she held these beliefs so close. It had been difficult to learn that the biggest obstacle standing in Ella’s way was, in fact, herself—and not her mother—and that her fears were overpowering her desires. But she wasn’t staying stuck in her loop anymore.

She lifted her gaze, searching for that particular person who embodied all of her fears and desires in one. When she landed on Riley, already seated by the fire, a surge of love passed through the connection between them, coating all of her body with the intensity of the dancing flames in front of her.

Riley’s eyes captured hers, buoying her heart with a soul-defying ache in the best way possible, lifting her and carrying her above the crowd, higher than the pillowing smoke, cradling her in a softness that made her feel she could do anything and be anyone.

As the two of them watched each other, lost in the haze of their energies, saying a thousand things without words, Ella’s mouth curved into a smile.

Being with Riley, she’d learnt a whole new meaning of the word surrender.

She might not have found her purpose yet or her “soul key” or whatever, but she’d found her happiness again. As Pauline threw her bundle of sage into the fire and Ella moved to the front, the realisation struck her like a flash of lightning.

Of course. Her purpose was so simple. She’d expected it to be rooted deep within her, to spring forth and fill her with a life-changing epiphany that would sweep her off her feet, perhaps render her unconscious at its weight. But as she stared into the flames, the heat warming her face, another ripple of joy crested in her chest, and she knew she’d found it.

Ella’s purpose was to be happy.

She wasn’t intent on winning every award, like Devin and Clarice, or on building a hefty nest egg, like her parents. Ella’s focus was on the simple things: sharing the sunrise with someone who appreciated it just as much as she did; picking fresh oranges and kissing under the trees; painting badly because it was better than not painting anything at all. Even trying to surf, because you might surprise yourself and actually be good at it.

She couldn’t stop a bubble of laughter from leaving her throat as she stepped forward and took a bundle of something green to offer to the fire. The bark was rough under her fingertips. Sucking in a lungful of burning wood, she cast the bundle into the flames, squeezing her eyes shut and sending her thought to whoever was listening.

I just want to be me.

Applause rippled around her, and another whoop from Winnie brought her eyelids fluttering open to take in the scene. The happy faces, the smoke, the all-consuming feeling that Ella’s life was about to change for the better.

After exchanging thumbs-ups and waves with her best friend, and then a lingering smile at Riley, Ella took her seat beside her new bestie, Pauline, joining in the celebrations as the last of their group gave their offerings.

Some time passed while the fire grew and climbed with ferocity, spitting and sparking, specks of ash drifting around them like snowflakes. The crowd lost themselves in the hypnotic burning as they waited until it stopped pluming smoke to continue their celebration. A calmness possessed Ella as she watched the dancing flames, feeling the stone under her feet and the collective quiet as the fire sparked and popped. Smoke curled and spiralled upwards, and she breathed in the scent, embracing the moment as everything passed through her. The past. The present. The future.

She wondered if everyone else was feeling this, too.

She peered at Pauline from the corner of her eye, hoping she felt as much love as Ella did in this moment. Just to be sure, she took the woman’s warm hand in hers and gave it a squeeze, before returning her gaze to the flames .

When the burning steadied, Senhor Arenoso retook his place at the front, ready to award the spirit totems.

“Our spirit guides are not new to us. They may live in the shadows for some time, shut out from our hearts when we close ourselves off. But being here, reconnecting with nature, is the perfect opportunity to build on your relationship with your guide. When you nurture that relationship and tune into the energy, life flows easier. When you take a moment and listen, you’ll be amazed at all the things you’ve been missing that were right there all along.” He flashed his practised smile and called the first person to the front.

Ella expected to feel nervous at this point of the night. For weeks, the spirit guides had been a constant topic of conversation between the guests and the staff alike. She thought about the dolphin marked between Riley’s shoulder blades. How the dolphin represented a beautiful balance between playfulness and protection, and how that fit Riley so well.

Ella loved all the variations of Riley; she was excited to see what other sides of herself she could unlock with her spirit guide’s influence.

When Senhor Arenoso called her name, she wiped the stickiness from Pauline’s clammy hand on her dress and blew out a breath. The heat of the fire warmed her as she circled it, and then she waited opposite Senhor Arenoso, her palm facing upward.

His knowing gaze combed over her, and she swallowed, intimidated by the owl headpiece that was also staring into her soul. “Passionate, fiery, fierce, loyal. Your energies lie on the strong tip of the scale. A key focus for you, Ella, is to remember the spiritual connection with the earth and how this feeds and restores balance to yourself. This connection is just as important. Don’t lose that. Balance is key.” He touched her palm, closed his eyes, and a deep rumble came from his throat. “Ella, your guide has come to me, in all their light and mightiness.” He dipped his head, producing a wooden totem wrapped tightly in his hand. He hung the string over her head, and Ella held her breath, waiting for the next words to leave his lips. “The turkey.”

A…turkey?

Raucous applause engulfed her, and he spun her to face the cheering crowd. She caught Winnie’s hooting laughter, not even trying to hide it as she echoed Senhor’s announcement to the people seated next to her.

Ella thumbed the totem in her hand, feeling the smooth edges and the carved feathers. A turkey. A turkey ? Then, a giant grin broke across her face. Sure, why the hell not?

“Woo!” she cheered, lifting the totem high and earning another surge of appreciation from the crowd. Happiness coated her head-to-toe, and when her gaze fell on Riley once again, it multiplied tenfold. Ella was exactly where she needed to be.

* * *

Once the last of the totems had been handed out, the real party began. Riley and the other staff moved the log seating to the side, making room around the burning fire. The band sprang to life, encouraging people to dance to the lively beat in the new space on the stone paving. The locals took to it immediately, the guests needing a bit more encouragement—apart from Winnie, who had first made sure to congratulate Ella on her graduation and also to give her best impression of a turkey, gobble gobble, before spying a handsome man in her peripheral vision and quickly making her move.

Ella smiled as she watched the people twirl around, stepping this way and that, while the well-rehearsed ones clicked fingers and stomped their feet to the tune of the piano accordion and drum. Winnie tried her best to keep up with the tree trunk of a man wheeling her around, but the sight made Ella’s sides ache from laughing. Pauline, newly equipped with the cougar totem hanging around her neck— who knew?— threw her head back in a fit of giggles too, as she spun her sister in clumsy circles. The two were like twins, separated only by a different colour fascinator. Ella hoped Pauline would get to have a shot at dancing with Marco Marcos later in the evening.

Her cougar guide could surely only benefit her.

“I did have the feeling you’d be a bird.” A warm, silky voice sounded in Ella’s ear as Riley nestled in the space beside her.

Ella let out another laugh—she’d been doing that a lot tonight—and squeezed her new totem between her fingers. “Does this mean I can’t eat them anymore?”

“Probably not. Cannibalism is frowned upon in most countries.”

Ella snorted, shifting her body so that she pressed her shoulder to Riley’s. Heat burned through the touch, and Riley leaned into it. As much as the dynamic between the two of them was fun, Ella couldn’t wait to be in the open with her. To be able to touch her, and hold her, and kiss her without consequence.

Just one more day.

She exhaled, catching the whiff of food being served at the other end of the courtyard.

“Anyway, what’re you doing over here?” Riley asked, a teasing lilt to her voice. “Tonight’s about celebrating.” She took a step forward and held out her hand.

Ella hesitated. What about all the watchful eyes?

“A dance isn’t going to get us thrown into jail, Ells. Come on.”

Ella took her hand, and Riley pulled her right into the centre of the dancing bodies. She shrieked, unable to help it, as Riley guided her side to side, dropping her hands to clap to the beat and picking them up again as they glided across the floor. How was this woman so good at everything?

“I thought you weren’t supposed to have favourite guests,” Ella said, as Riley tugged her into a spin.

“Well, I do.” She ducked in close to whisper in her ear. “And this dress is also a new favourite of mine. You look incredible.”

New heat prickled the back of Ella’s neck and chest, and she bit her lip, suddenly hyperaware of Riley’s strong hands commanding her body.

A small woman playing the cavaquinho , which Ella understood to be a small Portuguese guitar, stood from her stool and dived into an enthusiastic solo. The crowd roared, hungry for more, and the other band members brought their hands above their heads to encourage the clapping.

But Ella wasn’t focused on the music anymore—just the fire that Riley ignited in the places the other couldn’t touch. Adrenaline fired through her veins, and she slid her arm around Riley’s waist. “Just how much do you love this dress?”

Riley took in Ella’s cleavage and her exposed neck with hungry eyes. “So much.”

Ella wet her lips, and Riley caught the movement. A throbbing need grew between her legs, stirring up an intoxicating ache. “Show me.”

The rhythmic clapping continued around them, building, echoing, beating along with Ella’s heart as she watched the realisation wash over Riley’s gorgeous face. Her lips parted slightly, mouth pulling into a sexy grin that brought out those dimples. Then Ella was being pulled away, out of the crowd and the heat of the fire, away from the upbeat music.

They giggled like teenagers, hand in hand, running deeper into the night, the moonlight guiding them along the darkened paths. Ella had no idea where they were going, but with her fingers threaded through Riley’s, she didn’t care.

Riley lifted Ella over a gate just off the main path, and she squealed, legs kicking the air. Riley’s mouth covered Ella’s as she landed, her strong hands steadying her as their kisses quickly became frenzied. She guided Ella into a wooden shack in the field, kicking open the door and pushing her inside. A lone window cast moonlight into the space, and the earthy scent of straw filled her senses.

“Is this…a barn?” Ella asked, glancing around but not seeing much.

“Sort of. It’s only used for the goats in winter. More just for storage now.”

Goats. Of course. Ella laughed, and Riley pulled her back, keeping her hands firmly planted on Ella’s hips, gripping the creases of her dress.

“Is that a problem?” she asked, tightening hold of the fabric. Her voice lowered, reaching new, deep, sexy levels. “Because I really do love this dress.”

Ella shook her head, her heart stuttering at the dreamy look swirling in Riley’s irises, which were deep midnight pools in the lack of light. Her stomach pulled, heat spreading between her thighs with an all-consuming longing. “Only a problem if you don’t make me come, ’cos I fucking need you right now.”

Wasting no time, Riley lifted her dress, bunching it behind her back while sliding her other hand into her damp underwear.

Ella let out a groan as their hands and mouths came together desperately, their cries of pleasure lost to the crowd of guests as they partied in the courtyard.

When they came apart, gasping, sweaty, and satisfied—even with a little bit of straw-burn on Ella’s thighs—they ran back to the party, finding it still in full swing.

They rejoined the festivities, laughing and dancing under the moonlight until the very last ember in the fire burnt out.

Their new journey had begun.