The Heir's Bargain (Of Fire and Lies)

Chapter 33

Between my fightwith Fynn and the day the boat set sail, training and meetings filled my schedule. At first, I was thankful for the distractions. It meant I was too occupied during the day to think about the heartache that was trying to swallow me whole. Yet no matter how much my muscles ached or my eyes burned from exhaustion, when the night greeted me, so too did thoughts of Fynn.

Every night when I laid down to go to sleep, I replayed our fight in my head, despite knowing I shouldn”t. It was my nature to review past events and study them for better alternatives. I tried to see if there was a way our argument could have ended differently, a way I couldn’t have prevented the argument. But no matter how I looked at it, I knew nothing would have changed the outcome.

I understood Fynn”s concerns. I understood why he was worried. Yet understanding his fears did not mean we could have avoided the inevitable.

And that fight? It was inevitable, no matter how we twisted it.

Fynn wanted to protect those he loved; I wanted to fight for them.

The morning before Moris, Sylvia, Quint, and I set sail, I stood on the dock with our closest friends and family—saying goodbye without uttering the actual word to those who came.

My parents stood with my brothers and their wives. After giving me a quick hug, Sawyer hurried after Ronan. My nephew ran up and down the dock, chasing after the fish swimming in the sea. When I was Ronan”s age, I had attended several send-offs for my father. Back then, I didn”t understand the dangers my father and the other soldiers often faced when they departed. It was strange being on the other side now, seeing the watery eyes of loved ones and the smiles of ignorant children as they played on the dock.

As I kissed my niece”s forehead, I knew in my heart that the leaders were wrong. Everyone standing on the dock—my family and friends—was another reason I fought for my kingdom.

They were my why.

I should have never let the leaders’ concerns with my love life get in the way of seeing that. I should have never let my father make me think otherwise. I had plenty of people to fight for.

My sister-in-law, Ambrosia, smiled at me as Lia reached for me. Chuckling, I gave her my finger, and her tiny fingers wrapped around mine.

”Come home safe, all right? You”re the only sane one among your brothers,” Ambrosia said.

My brothers’ wives and I weren’t close. Both were quiet women, focused on building their homes and families. But I liked them well enough. They made Sawyer and Xavier happy—and I especially liked how they kept my brothers out of my hair for once.

I laughed. ”If only that were true.”

Lia released my hand and reached for her mother”s hair, tugging it. Ambrosia chuckled. After a swift embrace, my sister-in-law turned away and headed for Sawyer and Ronan.

Terin stepped forward, pulling me into a hug and squeezing me tight. All the words no one said were embedded into his embrace. But it was what he chose to say aloud that had me stumbling back a half step.

”I did ask him to come.”

I struggled to swallow the rising lump in my throat. ”I—I wasn”t looking.”

”If you say so, Dani.” Terin”s brown eyes met mine, and I dropped his gaze, offering him a terse smile, unwilling to admit the sourness in my stomach.

I shouldn”t have been surprised. In truth, I hadn”t expected even Terin or Graeson to show up. None of us liked goodbyes. But deep down, I had hoped Fynn would have shown up.

Captain Squires, one of the most experienced sailors, whistled. After one final look at my friends and family, I boarded the ship with the rest of my squad. Then, we were off.

And I forced myself not to look back.

In the firstcouple of hours, everyone was lively, and the excitement of the voyage was fresh in the air. Leaving Pontia, the Red Sea was calm, as if the god Pontanius were blessing us on our journey south. But the trip from Pontia was always easy; it was the journey back that would prove to be treacherous, according to Captain Squires.

As we sailed, Quint tried to make small talk about the weather or his family, and I tried my best to listen. But when the nodding and smiling became too much, I gave up, my smile fading in the salt-filled air.

At some point, Sylvia and Moris tried to pull me into a game of cards, but I couldn”t recall the rules of a game I had known since I was a child. Diamonds looked like hearts, and queens melted into kings.

As the sun beamed down on the dock, the loneliness crept in.

I tried to think about my niece”s small, bright face, her tiny fingers wrapping around mine. I tried to think about Ronan chasing fish, his unfiltered laughter echoing across the sea. They were the future of our kingdom, my reasons for fighting.

Yet my thoughts kept wandering to the future king. To the man who would one day lead Pontia to a brighter tomorrow.

The leaders were foolish to have thought that giving my heart to someone to hold would encourage me to be a better leader. Fynn had held a piece of my heart since we were children, and it had done me no good all those years. But now that he held my heart in its entirety with more than a sea between us? It was soul-splitting.

When we landed near the mouth of the Lucien River and traveled along the stream on foot the next day, the voyage south remained quiet and unexciting. We should have been grateful for the silence, yet it only made my thoughts louder and my regrets more bitter.

I couldn”t help but wonder how Fynn managed to exist with anyone else”s thoughts inside his head. Mine alone were already too loud.

After ten days of traveling,we finally arrived outside the rendezvous point.

Our mission was simple: meet with our contact and retrieve the intel that was too important to pass along by our spies” standard coded messages.

When we were chosen for this mission, I wondered why we needed four people to go. It would have been much easier and quicker to travel alone. But when I asked, my father had shaken his head.

”We”re sending a full squad, nothing less,” he had said.

Beneath his words, though, lay the real reason: a squad ensured that the mission, no matter what, would be completed. That if the gods were not on our side and one soldier was lost, someone would survive.

Our contact would not arrive until morning, so all that was left to do was wait.

The cave I had chosen for us was tucked away along the mountainside. Rocky cliffs nestled on one side of the entrance and a forest of trees to the right. The four of us hugged our cloaks tight to our bodies as we sat side-by-side around the dwindling fire. Although several weeks remained before the autumn chill crept onto Pontian shores, one would have never guessed that in the mountains separating the kingdoms of Borgania and Kadia. In the northeastern kingdoms, winters were long and hard. If the frigid night air were any indication, this coming season would be no different across Vaneria.

Moris handed me a flask. The time spent traveling had left Moris” usually clean-shaven face burly. His light brown skin beneath his eyes also showed more purple tones than usual.

With a nod, I grabbed the flask and twisted the cap off. However, when I brought it to my lips, the smell of oak and leather wafted to my nose. I put the cap back on and returned it to him, mumbling, ”No, thanks.”

”Come on, Ferrios,” Moris said, nudging me. ”We”ve been traveling nonstop for the last thirteen days. Enjoy the quiet while you can.”

I shook my head, tugging my knees closer to my chest. ”Someone needs to stay sharp.”

With a shake of his head, Moris said, his mouth already to the flask, ”More for us then.”

He passed it to Sylvia, who drank from it quickly, sighing. They passed the flask to Quint and wrapped their cloak tightly around their body.

As they continued to pass the flask back and forth, I scanned the area outside the entrance. Moris might have been right about the long hike, but I knew better than to let the quiet of the woods fool me. The moment the air stilled and the noise of the wandering rabbits and squirrels dwindled, that was when one should be concerned.

Silence, after all, was not always a gift.

There were messages in the silence. Small, nearly imperceptible cracks of twigs, the rustling of leaves, the prickling of the back of the neck. The minute disturbances that the average person might have ignored were the things that I couldn”t help but hear and latch onto. It was why my comrades called me the huntress, and it was one of the reasons I was here.

Apparently, another being that I was the only one wise enough to keep a sharp mind.

”Why is it so fucking cold?” Moris asked, his teeth clattering together. ”Isn”t liquor supposed to keep you warm?”

”Which idiotic question do you want me to answer first?” I retorted.

”Idiotic? They”re not idiotic! They”re practical,” Moris argued, scooting closer to the fire as he shivered harder. ”But the first one.”

Quint snorted beside me, pulling the hood of his cloak lower.

I rolled my eyes. ”Because we”re on top of a mountain, dingus.”

”And?”

I rubbed my temples, trying to soothe the headache that was quickly forming. ”And do I look like a scientist?”

”No, but you usually know everything. You tracked down the rabbits on the way here. You knew which paths to avoid because you had sensed someone else”s presence.”

I scoffed. ”I do not sense things, Moris. I listen to what my surroundings are telling me.”

Rubbing his hands together near the flames, Moris shrugged. ”Sounds like you sense it to me.”

Out past the cave”s entrance, leaves rustled as the wind swept through the woods. Goosebumps spread across my arms. I squinted at the shadows slithering between the trees as night fell. A breeze flew in, howling. The air ruffled our clothes and stirred the fire. The sun had begun its descent, and soon, we would need to blow the fire out. But until then, we needed to soak in its heat before the crisp breeze coated our uncovered skin as night fell.

Sylvia cleared their throat, bringing my attention back to the group. ”It”s cold up here because the atmospheric pressure is lower in the mountains, so?—”

”All right, all right,” Moris said, cutting Sylvia off. ”I get it, Sylv.”

”What? You asked.”

”Yeah, but listening to you is just making it colder.”

”That”s not possible,” Sylvia said with a sigh. ”In fact, the more talking there is, the warmer?—”

”Sylv,” Moris whined.

Sylvia raised their hands. ”Sorry for trying to educate you. I”ll just shut up.”

”Thank the gods,” Moris sighed. ”Pontanius himself could fall asleep to your educating.”

Laughter filled our small circle. Even I couldn”t help but crack a smile. But then Sylvia had to ruin it.

”Are you ever going to talk about it?” Sylvia asked, their attention turning to me.

”About what?” I asked, my smile fading.

Sylvia arched a brow.

I buried my chin into the crook between my knees and chest. ”Do we need to discuss this right now?”

Sylvia looked around the cave. ”What? Is there another way you would rather spend our time while we wait for dawn to rise?” Sylvia took a swig from the flask and passed it to Moris.

”Enough of this,” I said, snatching the flask from Moris” hand. ”We need to stay sharp. Don”t we, Major Torian?” I asked Quint, hoping he would provide some resemblance of order—as a leader should.

Moris shrugged.

I shook the flask, but nothing echoed inside the container. Turning it upside down, a singly measly drop slipped out.

Empty.

I narrowed my eyes at Moris, whose eyes were already glass.

”Is that what this is about?” Quint asked after a moment.

”Is that what what is about?” I asked, tossing the flask onto the ground.

”This,” Quint said, pointing at me before tugging his cloak tighter around him. ”You”ve been acting cold this entire trip. Is it because of the promotion? If you care to know, I thought you would get it. I still think you deserved?—”

I shook my head and cut him off before he could push the knife further into the wound. ”I am not upset because of the promotion, Quint.”

”But you are upset, aren”t you?”

I clicked my tongue, huggingmy legs. ”I am not upset at all.”

Sylvia snorted. ”Don”t let her fool you, Major. She is upset, but not at you.”

”Then who?” Quint asked.

”Ferrios and Prince Charming had a fight at the commander”s dinner.”

”You should have been there, Major. It was—” Moris snapped his mouth shut when I chucked a throwing knife inches from his boot.

Sylvia snickered.

Quint continued, ”Yes, well, I didn’t want to miss my niece”s birth. Family does come first,” Quint said to Moris before turning to me. ”You and the prince fought?”

I scoffed. ”Of course not. Sylvia is exaggerating.”

Sylvia, however, brushed me off, continuing as if I hadn”t said a single word and wasn”t currently reaching for another throwing knife. ”The prince was upset that someone didn”t inform him she was coming.”

I tried to interject, my brows twisting, ”It”s not that. It”s?—”

”Was this your first fight?” Quint asked, turning a curious gaze toward me.

”Our first fight?” My eyes widened, and I wrapped my arms tighter around my legs. ”I told you, we’re not fighting.”

We weren”t anything anymore based on how we left things, I thought to myself.

”Come on, Dani. You were just complaining to me about?—”

I elbowed Sylvia in the ribcage, and they hissed. ”Hey! What was that for?”

”Shut up, Sylvia,” I hissed.

When Fynn slammed the door shut on his way out after dinner, those in attendance figured something was wrong. According to Sylvia, no one had dared voice it, though. On the voyage over, Sylvia had asked me what had happened. And in confidence—or at least what I thought was in confidence—I had relayed some of the details about the argument.

”Fine. I won”t say anything else. But”—there was always a but when it came to Sylvia—”if I were you, I would talk to him when we return and try to make up. Rumor has it there are women already lining up to be next.”

My stomach twisted. ”Next?”

Moris nodded and said, ”You know, the next to court Fynn?”

My lungs dropped to the pit of my stomach. Our courtship—if one could even call it that—might have been short-lived, but I had thought Fynn would have at least waited to find his next conquest.

My conversation with him after the dinner resurfaced. I had told him I was not a queen. I had told him my career was important. But what did he say?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Instead, Fynn only focused on the mission.

And what was that supposed to mean? Did he, too, think we were ignorant for believing we could have been something?

We had yet to talk concretely about what would happen after the deal was over. If we hadn”t fought, would there have been an after?

Or was I just the latest woman in Fynn”s line-up, as Moris had suggested?

”I”m going to get some sleep while I can,” Moris said, stretching his arms up.

Sylvia looked at me.

”I”ll take the first watch,” I said.

”No, I got it,” Quint said. ”You get some sleep, Ferrios. You”ve already done most of the heavy lifting to get us here. It”s the least I can do.”

My gaze fell to the flask.

Quint shook his head. ”I didn”t drink any.”

My lips parted. The question of why Moris only gave me a hard time was on the tip of my tongue, but I swallowed it.

I nodded to Quint and headed toward the edge of the cave, peering out.

The sky had turned to a muted purple now. A few stars dotted the sky, but most of the gods still hid among the clouds. I could only make out the constellation of Barinthian, the god of truth, peeking out.

I turned away from the god.

Right now, the truth was not something I wished to see.

I found my spot beside Sylvia and curled next to them on my side.

Soon, darkness filtered into the cave like a heavy shadow. When I closed my eyes to sleep, two deep brown eyes stared down at me, and a sharp pain twisted in my stomach.