The Kraken’s Queen (Grym Hollow #3)

23. Erin

Chapter 23

Erin

T oday I’m getting married to my kraken.

I never thought I would say those words. Most little girls dream of marrying their prince or princess. I doubt many girls dream of marrying a sea monster. To be fair, Allarick is the furthest thing away from a monster. He’s my gentle giant. My king.

And about to be my husband.

My lips still tingle from the earth-shattering kiss we shared last night. It was just a kiss—well, a lot of kisses—and yet I can’t stop thinking about it. The way he made me feel. Both safe and desired. How I wanted more but didn’t know how to ask.

We left early this morning for Tetria. I’m not sure how Allarick did it, but when we arrive back home, Iris and Delmare await us. We decided—after much back and forth—we want to marry immediately, which explains why the castle is already buzzing with activity; merpeople, krakens, and sirens all rushing around. Some hold decorations in their hands, and others bark orders. The one thing they have in common is they all stare at me, smiling widely like they have a secret I’m not privy to.

“We received your message, my king. The wedding preparations are going on full force,” Iris says. “We should be ready by this evening.”

“Good. See to it that Erin is comfortable,” Allarick says, and my stomach drops.

“You aren’t staying with me?” Of course, I should have known he wouldn’t be getting ready with me during our wedding day, but I had the childish hope he would. I kiss him once, and suddenly I’m attached.

Allarick’s features soften as he turns to me. He rests his hands on my hips and leans down to press a kiss to my lips. My cheeks burn bright red because both Iris and Delmare are there to witness this. Not that they haven’t done the same thing a million times, some in front of me, because they are married.

“Iris will help you get ready for the wedding, sweet girl. I have a few things I need to do to get ready as well. Make sure things are in order for the ceremony. Delmare will assure your safety while I’m away.”

“No harm will befall you, my queen,” Delmare vows. And I don’t doubt his ability to keep me safe. He’s just not Allarick, who brings me peace and helps to keep me calm.

I don’t want the nerves and the small voice that tells me I don’t deserve someone like Allarick to ruin our day. I smile and nod, not able to trust my voice right now. Allarick squeezes my hips before Iris takes my hand and leads me away. I swim besides Iris, allowing her to lead while Delmare follows from behind.

I expect Iris to take me up to my room, but we stay on the main floor, and she takes me into an interior room. “I can take it from here, my love. The queen will need to dress,” Iris says to her husband. Delmare nods in understanding.

“Let me secure the room first.” He swims inside, inspecting every inch of the room. When he’s sure there isn’t a killer shark in the corner or an angry siren fixed on ending me, he swims back out.

“Safe.” He stations himself right outside the room.

“Thank you.” Iris shuts the door behind him. There are no windows in this room, which I’m thankful for. I’m still not fully comfortable with undressing in front of Iris; the last thing I need is for the entire ocean to be able to see me. Even if Allarick stresses they can’t see in. I’m not willing to take that gamble.

The room is set up with three large mirrors adorned with colorful seaweed. A slightly raised dais stands in the middle. There’s a large walk-in closet and many trunks around the room. “This is our royal dressing room. It’s where I’ve been getting most of your clothes,” Iris explains, leading me to the dais. “Start stripping, my queen.”

Iris disappears into a closet. I hear her rummaging through trunks and grunting as she heaves something heavy. When she reappears, she’s winded. “Found it. Pesky thing was trying to hide from me.” She smiles as she carries what appears to be a box. “We haven’t had a royal wedding in some time, and I’ve always wanted to see the dress in person.”

Iris undoes the locks on the box and lifts up the lid. She pulls out a shimmering opal bodice and inspects it before holding it up. The bodice is made up of hundreds of scales with small pearls sewed in throughout. It looks heavy and breakable. “That’s gorgeous, but are you sure I should be wearing that?”

Iris stares at me like I’ve sprouted a second head. “This dress is made for a queen. You will be queen. Therefore, this was made for you, dear.”

I finish taking off my clothes, balling them up and tossing them into an empty, open trunk as Iris wraps the bodice around me. She begins to tie it in the back, sucking me into the damn thing. Breathing and moving are clearly not needed today.

The panties she gives me to put on are hardly panties at all. More like three strips of…whatever fabric they’re made up of. Hides absolutely nothing. Still, I pull them up over my legs and shimmy into them. “And the skirts, my queen.”

In Iris’s hand is a full white skirt made up of organza material. The light hits it just right, making it sparkle like a million rainbows. It’s beautiful and the nicest thing I’ll ever wear on my body. I help Iris get the skirts on me. They dance in the ocean, fanning out around me. There’s no hiding in this outfit.

Next comes my hair, which Iris twists into several medium-sized braids before doing an elaborate pin-up. She uses pins with tiny seashells at the end to keep my hair in place. Makeup really isn’t a thing here—at least from my brief encounter with Tetria—so she rubs various oils on my body until I smell like a fresh bakery.

“Just a few final touches.” Iris starts on the jewelry. A pearl necklace with matching earrings. Bracelets of various shades of blue to add a pop of color. And then, finally, a tiara made from coral and shells. She places it on my head and swims back.

The woman in the mirrors staring back at me is not the same woman who showed up to Mescos broken and scared. She’s not full of bruises with sadness in her eyes. No, this woman has faced hardships but survived. A newfound determination shines in her eyes. The need to live that did not previously exist burns in her. For the first time in my life, I feel powerful.

I feel like a queen.

“You look beautiful, my queen,” Iris says from behind me. I see her smile in the mirror, looking over my dress. “It’s time. Let’s go marry your king.”

I hear the crowd before I can see them. A cacophony of voices vibrates down the hall. My pounding heart thrums in my chest, louder than all the voices. The too-tight bodice squeezes me uncomfortably, making it hard to breathe. Iris holds my hand, leading me down the hallway lined with guards. Delmare swims behind us a respectable distance. Iris whispers sweet encouragements to me, but I can barely hear her.

All I hear is my pounding heart. Fear threatens to overwhelm me, and the walls feel as if they are caving in on me. My body stops.

I tend to avoid crowded places because loud noise and unfamiliar people watching or touching me trigger something inside me. Years and years of insecurities and verbal lashings come back to me at once, assaulting my senses.

I’m not good enough. No one wants me. I’ll be a shitty queen. I don’t deserve love.

Over and over, the mantra plays in my head, creating my own personal hell. My body shakes, unable to hold in the panic coursing through my body.

Not now.

Not here.

“My queen!” I hear someone shout—probably Iris. Everyone is too close. Too loud. Voices ring in my ear, and I try to block them out, slapping my hands over my ears.

“Stop. I need…I need…” My voice trails off as my body begins to betray me. My chest heaves as I desperately try to catch my breath. I need quiet. I need everyone to stop touching me. I need to find my damn voice. I need…I need…I need…

“Get Allarick. Tell him it’s urgent, and the queen needs him,” a gruff, masculine voice barks. The small hands on my back pull away, and bubbles follow her as she departs.

Delmare reaches out to me, but I scream, jerking away. I don’t mean to do it, but I can’t have him touch me. My hands fly to my head, blocking my face. I’ll feel bad about it later, but I don’t want his hands on me. They’re too big. Too rough. Just like James. James who used me as his personal punching bag as he told me everything he hated about me. All my shortcomings. All my failures.

A flurry of commotion sounds from ahead, and someone barks, “Leave us!”

I hear people scramble, swishing their tails to get away. Then I feel something slither around my arms. Something else wraps around my waist, and I’m being pulled into a hard, naked chest.

“Sweet girl,” Allarick purrs gently. He’s here. My Allarick. My safety. He’s here.

More tentacles wrap around me until they cover my body completely, cocooning me in their embrace. Protecting me from others, but also myself. “Listen to my heart. Count the beats. Match your breathing with my own. In. Out. In. Out. Try it, sweet girl.”

His voice is a security blanket, keeping the monsters at bay. I count his heartbeats. One…two…three… And try to match my breathing to his. In and out. In and out. My breathing starts to even out, and the crippling panic that immobilized me starts to fade. My body unclenches as it relaxes in Allarick’s embrace.

“There you go. Come back to me, Erin. I need you.”

I need you.

“Allarick,” I croak. “I…I don’t know what came over me.” It’s a lie. I know my triggers, and usually I can prepare for them, but my mind was so focused on the wedding that I didn’t even think about the audience and stares our wedding would bring .

“Perhaps you missed me.” He grins, almost boyishly.

I laugh but gently smack his chest, which is colored with blue markings. He quickly covers my hand with his before I can pull away. Then the teasing expression is gone, replaced by something more serious. More determined. “If you aren’t ready, we do not have to do this today.”

I think of all the people waiting outside. All the rushed planning and setting up it took to get the wedding prepared on such short notice. Not to mention our marriage can make him more powerful for when he needs to seal off the Leviathan’s prison. It isn’t as easy as saying no, I’m not ready. Because that would diminish all the hard work everyone put into this. People would leave disappointed, and rumors would fly as to why the human queen did not marry the king.

No. Postponing the wedding isn’t an option. Besides, I don’t want to postpone it. Maybe that’s crazy since my relationship with Allarick is so fresh and new, but I’ve never been a conventional girl.

“I want to marry you, Allarick.” My voice, thankfully, stays strong. “I just didn’t anticipate what all the commotion would do to me. I think I just needed to feel you wrapped around me.” I tilt my head back to smile.

Allarick’s stare bores into me with its intensity. It’s so raw and full of something akin to admiration. Maybe more. “I will always be there when you need me, Erin. You have carved your name into my heart, and I’m afraid it can’t be undone.”

Definitely more.

Despite being surrounded by water, my throat goes dry. By his words alone, this man has unwound me. He saw something that not even I could see and believed in me.

“Allarick?” I whisper.

“Yes, Erin?”

“Marry me.”