The Prospect (Crawfield Football Club #3)

27. H A Z E L

TWENTY-SEVEN

H A Z E L

I’d lived my life watching the films, reading the books, and dedicating myself to the world of romance because I’d been searching for a love story that would mask the imminent reality of my own.

I’d thought being transported away and living vicariously through another would aid me in my battle against the emotions I’ve been fighting since I was seven years old. But with the grace of his lips displaced against mine, it feels like only now I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d known all along that watching the films and reading the books would never appease me. Why? Because the only love story I ever wanted was with him .

Is this a dream? I can’t tell if I just said that out loud, but for some reason, I don’t care. Regardless of whether or not this is or isn’t, everything about this moment feels otherworldly.

When Green and I last kissed in this exact spot a few weeks back, I knew that the only way to ensure my survival—to ensure that I could go forward, would be to suppress the kiss to a depth of no return.

But with his one hand tousled within my hair and the other cinched onto my waist, the once repressed emotion starts to resurface, and I struggle to fight it, nor the desire to want to.

His truth, quite like his lips, sways me without even trying, parting my mouth in desperation as I quiver beneath his grasp, allowing the kiss to escalate as I feel the air inflate into my lungs.

At this moment, I’m persuaded that without Green, life is breathless. He’s like oxygen, reminding me that he’s a necessity—the one thing I’ll never be able to live without, but with that reminder comes another, one that’s just as hard to forget as it is one to remember right now.

Hart.

He’s there, at the house, waiting for me and yet, in my attempt to say goodnight to Green, somehow, I’ve ended up kissing him on this bridge.

The formidable action leads me to the same thought that I can’t seem to shake: this can’t happen.

I’m displaced as I toy with the options in my mind. What should I do? Do I stay within this blissful dream I’ve ached for all my life or do what’s morally right and pull back?

I opt for the latter as I’m reminded that sometimes in life, the right decision isn’t always the most pleasurable one.

“I—I can’t, Green.” I shake my head, stumbling back until I find my way toward the side of the bridge. “Hart… He’s waiting for me. What’s he going to think? What’s he going to do? What is he going to say?—”

“Stop thinking about everyone else right now, Hazel.” Green cuts my senseless rambling short as he clutches hold of my hand once more and pulls me in tight. “The two of us have fallen victim to that for far too long. Now tell me,” his voice turns serious, “what is it that you want?” he asks. “Is it me? Do you want me?”

The answer to his question is simple. So simple that it rests at the tip of my tongue comfortably like it’s always been there. It has always been there.

“I just don’t understand.” I can’t seem to wrap my mind around all of this. “I can’t understand.”

“You don’t need to, Haze,” Green tells me. “I couldn’t make sense of it myself either, but then when Amira told me about how you felt too?—”

“Amira?” I cut him off. “Woah, woah, woah,” I’m stuttering like a nervous wreck. “What did Amira tell you exactly?”

“ Everything ,” Green confesses, and my world just about comes to a stop. “She told me about how you feel about me, Hazel.” There’s a smile aching to break free from behind his lips. “How you've always felt about me.”

“You know I’ve been in love before,” I slur out as Amira slings her arm over my shoulder, steadying me in place.

“Is that so?” She smirks down at me, looking for more details. “With who, huh?”

“My best friend,” I admit without an ounce of resistance, hardly hearing that little voice in my brain that tells me to stop what I’m saying right now.

“Your best friend?” Amira repeats back to me as she continues to guide the way, opening up the doors to our building as she leads me inside.

“Yup.” I smile with a confident nod of my head. “I have been since I was seven years old. He’s the only man I’ve ever loved, and probably will be the only man I ever will.”

It feels good to finally get that off my chest, say it out loud. The confession has been on repeat in my mind for years—this is the first time I’ve ever felt it on my lips and now that I have, it feels good; it feels right.

“Wow, note to self, you’re a confessional drunk.” Amira hits the button to summon the lift. “Care to share his name?” She leans up against the wall—folding her arms inquisitively across her chest.

Suddenly, a stint of sobriety kicks in, but still, the six tequila shots still have me in a chokehold as I murmur. “Daniel Green…my Greenie,” I tell her. “It’s him. It’ll only ever be him.”

They say that when time comes to a standstill, you’ll know it, and for the first time, you’ll feel the Earth beneath your feet. The air around you will grow thick, and all at once, your heart will begin to race—at least, that’s what I’d always seen in the films, but now here I am, living in my own genre that I don’t even know how to categorize.

Is this a thriller?

An action?

My own romance?

I have no idea. It’s like I’m the leading lady in a film, but don’t have a single indicator of what my lines are, what my plot is, or how I even got cast to begin with.

“That face of yours looks awfully familiar, Hazel,” Green admits, brushing his cool hand along the warmth of my cheek. I’m bright red; I can feel it. “You wanna know why?” he asks rhetorically. “Because I looked the exact same way when Amira told me about everything,” he admits, swallowing hard. “But then I came out here, to this spot, the place that’s always been ours and for the first time, I started to ask myself, fuck , how did I not see it sooner?”

“Green…” I’m trembling—too emotionally and physically unprepared to allow him the luxury of finishing that sentence.

“But now, when I really think about it, Hazel.” My interruption doesn't seem to phase him in the slightest. Rather, it only fuels him that much more as his tender gaze longs over my face. “I did see the signs. They were always there. Perhaps I was just too na?ve to realize, but the truth is, Hazel, you’ve been steadfast in the chaos of my life. You’ve always been there when I’ve needed you and through all the turmoil....” He peers down at his feet before diverting his attention back up. “You’ve been my peace.”

The rustling sway of the trees fills the lingering silence that follows his four words.

“You’ve been my peace.”

What do I say to that? What do I do with that? Never in my wildest dreams had I imagined I’d hear those words fall from his mouth. Never had I imagined that this day would finally come.

“You’re like a magnet, Hazel. You drew me in from the moment I first laid eyes on you. I mean…” He scoffs playfully in laughter. “If that’s true, then I guess that explains why I was pulled into your classroom.”

I join in on the faintest laughter with a roll of my eyes. “Something tells me that a football might’ve been the culprit for that one.”

“‘Maybe.” He breaks into an aching smile and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my right ear. “But I’d like to think that it was something greater, something like…” He loses traction with his words and locks into my eyes for support.

“ Fate? ” I throw it out there, not expecting that to be the answer he was searching for.

It was.

“Yeah,” he nods with certainty. “ Fate . So, here it goes. Maybe I didn’t know which direction your signs were leading me in, Hazel, but I do know this, and this, I don’t need to think twice about. I’m in love with you .” He gently clasps a hold of my cheeks and whispers, “I’ve been so in love with you that I’ve been blinded by it. Numb to it…”

I can feel his breath as he murmurs his ongoing confession, but most of all, I can feel the way that he’s finally looking at me like I’ve been looking at him.

All. These. Years.

“How could I have been so stupid?” Green shakes his head in defeat, releasing me from his hands as he takes a cautious step back. “I…I don’t deserve you, Hazel. I never have. Life gave me a blessing when I met you, and all I’ve managed to do is figure it out too late.”

I’ve propelled myself forward with a few eager steps before I can even rationalize the action. “‘Too late?’” I repeat. “What do you mean ‘too late’?”

“You said it yourself,” Green retorts. “Hart. He’s waiting for you, and by now, you’ve probably moved on,” he protests with a raised voice. “I missed my chance. Besides, who am I to stand in the way of you finally being happy with?—”

“ You ,” I finish his sentence, silencing him immediately.

It’s my turn to talk now.

“It’s you, Green. What don’t you understand?” I clutch a hold of his wrist. “It’ll always be you because regardless of what you might think, it never wasn’t…”

My shaky breath is the last thing that stands in the way of saying these final words to him. “It’s not too late,” I confess. “It will never be too late.”

And after years of him leaning in first to kiss me, this time, I kiss him, reclaiming what's mine.

What’s always been mine.

Instantaneous.

Within an instant, Green achingly pulls me in, wasting no time planting his lips right back into the one place I know they’ve always belonged.

I lose myself as I melt into his embrace. All the while, his strong arms lift me into the air as I willingly wrap my legs around his waist.

We stay put for a moment, basking in this symphony as our lips learn their ways around one another, until eventually, he walks us toward the brick along the edge of the bridge and places me down gently.

“Fuck,” he groans into my neck, planting sloppy kisses up and down before he murmurs into my ear. “I feel like I’ve been starving until now…”

The cold beneath my thighs is nothing in contrast to the heat I feel in between them. The way his lips trail down my neck and into my collarbone, it’s a euphoric feeling. A foreign feeling, yet somehow familiar.

It’s complicated, but I love it. Things don’t need to make sense right now, just like the following few words don’t as they escape my lips, “make love to me.”

Green’s eyes widen, and his head juts back. Or is it the opposite way around? I can’t tell.

All I know is that temptation has spoken and now that it has, it doesn’t matter what I say or what I do. There’s no turning back from this.

“Wha…what?” Green’s just as confused as I am, if not more. “Here… now ?”

“You’ve been my first for everything, Green,” I confess as the anxiety pulsates through my veins. “ Please ,” I beg, never more certain of anything in my life. “I don’t care where we are. I want this,” I admit. “I—I want you to be my first .”