Chapter Thirty-Nine

I’ve been sitting at the foot of the bed in our room for the last hour. Ryan is sitting against the headboard staring past me into space. I know she’s having a hard time finding her words. When Connor texted me back saying that she was talking to the girls, I was both relieved and disappointed. I want her to feel comfortable talking to me about what’s happening in that beautiful brain of hers.

“You don’t need to do this now, Ry. You can tell me when you’re ready.” I break the silence. “I don’t want you to feel pressured into telling me anything if you’re not ready.”

Her eyes snap to mine and she takes a deep breath before speaking. The words pour from her mouth as she tells me what happened, from the time she was kidnapped until the first time she came to. She’s sobbing and shaking as she explains the initial assault. It breaks my heart, but I worry if I interrupt and remind her she doesn’t need to tell me anything she’s not ready to, she’ll shut down entirely.

Rage courses through my body as she relives what that motherfucking psycho did to her. A fucking knife handle? She’s a monster.

I keep my eyes on Ryan as she continues speaking, as if the floodgates have opened and there is no going back. When she finally stops talking she looks up at me through the tears still streaming down her face.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for it to happen. I didn’t want it to,” she sobs.

I stand, taking a step toward where she is seated on the bed and kneel before her, making sure she is seeing my face without touching her.

“Baby, you are not at fault here, for any of it. You survived. You came home to me.” I urge her to hear my words, “That is all that matters.”

An hour later, Ryan lost her fight against the exhaustion from the day’s events, finally falling asleep snuggled with Ellie on our bed. I leave our room and go down the stairs to find Bennett and Jack cuddling on the couch watching a movie. I step around into their line of sight before speaking.

“Every time I’ve brought it up, you’ve changed the subject.” I attempt to remain calm. “Are they alive?”

Bennett doesn’t speak for a long moment. I can see the wheels turning in his head as he tries to choose his words.

“Technically, yes.” His response is clipped.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I snarl, the mask falling.

“She lost a lot of blood and is in a coma. He’s being held without bail.”

The news I was terrified to hear is almost comical.

“How long is he looking at?” I raise a brow at him.

“Theoretically, up to twenty years.” His voice is low, and I know he’s hiding something.

Before I can respond again, I hear Ryan scream. Dashing across the room, I take the stairs two at a time, racing to reach her. I open the door to find her sitting up in bed, her eyes closed while Ellie cowers on the edge of the bed.

“Kitten, it’s ok, I’m here.” I kneel down in front of her like I did earlier. “I’m right here, Kitten,” I repeat my words in an attempt to pull her from the nightmare.

It takes several attempts before she comes to, looking around the room like she doesn’t know what’s happening or where she is. Her eyes are full of confusion and then a flash of shame takes hold.

“I’m so sorry I woke you.” She sobs softly, her eyes locked on mine.

“You didn’t wake me. I was downstairs.” I attempt to reassure her.

“Oh,” is all she says before lying down again and scooting to the other side of the bed. “Will you sit with me? At least until I fall back asleep?”

I smile at her and nod, standing up next to the bed just to take a seat on the mattress next to her.

I keep my eyes on her, humming the song The Hell I Overcame by Bad Omens while she relaxes back into the mattress. It takes another twenty-five minutes for her to fall back into unconsciousness, but this time I stay in the room, transplanting myself down onto my makeshift bed on the floor. I find myself staring at the ceiling for what could be minutes or hours before I fade into the darkness as well.

Flashes of her perfect ass sliding back on my thick cock as my hands are gripping her hips so tightly she’ll have bruises in the morning. I groan as she slows down, tightening her pussy around me, torturing me as I allow her to have control.

“Baby, I need you to keep moving.” I rasp as I dig my fingers into her flesh even more.

My eyes open to a wild mane of blonde hair spread across the pillow in front of my face. My arm wrapped tightly around her torso, snaking up her chest where my hand is cupping her breast. I freeze, my dick already hard as steel at the close proximity.

Am I still dreaming?I have to be dreaming.

I can’t just move, she’ll panic if I wake her. Fuck, I’m gonna get hit in the balls no matter how this goes.

I take a deep breath before I speak, smelling the mix of kiwi and mango making me forget what I was doing for a moment.

“Kitten,” I whisper into her hair. “Ry, wake up.”

She moans in her sleep and wiggles back against my cock.

Fuck me.

“Baby, I need you to wake up.” My voice cracks.

“I don’t want to. I’m comfy.” She pouts into the pillow.

“I am too, but I don’t want to scare you if I move.” I admit quietly as I breathe her in.

She stirs next to me, grinding against me again. I try and fail to stifle the groan. A man is only so strong when the woman he loves is pressing against him like this.

I can tell when she comes to; her body goes rigid. I brace myself for impact but she relaxes back into me.

“I’m going to move away now. Ok?” I ask her, trying so hard to behave.

“It’s ok. Just hold me while we sleep.” She’s so quiet I think I imagine the words.

“I’m gonna need to hear that again, beautiful.” I hold my breath, waiting for my hopes to be shattered.

“Hold me, please?” she pleads next to me.

“Absofuckinglutely, Kitten.” I smile into her hair and pull her closer.

Her steady breaths lulls me under alongside her.

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