These Wicked Desires (Fates #3)

23. Ellis

Ellis

My words are like a gunshot in the room. Kai and Cade both jerk toward me, but they are unable to do anything. Sam looks at me, his smile victorious.

"I knew I could win you over, doll."

"Let them go," I say, clutching my chest where my connection to them is pulling taut as they slowly suffocate.

The bands of magic disappear, but the creatures holding them remain. "I can't let them go yet," Sam croons. "But I promise I'll let them go once we're far enough away they won't cause any trouble."

I don't believe him, but at least they are no longer being choked to death. This gives them a chance to escape. And I know they will. They won’t stop fighting.

"Ellis, no!" Cade's words are raspy but forceful.

Kai growls, doubling his efforts to get free. "Don't fucking think about it, Ellis!" He blinks, and from one second to the next, his gray eyes turn crimson. The monster has arrived. But it's still not enough to break away from his captor.

I look at both of them and my magic sizzles against my skin. Sam tsks and moves before I can blink. The syringe is pressed against my neck, the needle not quite penetrating. I freeze.

“I’d rather not have to lock down your magic, but I will if you don’t behave,” Sam snarls in my ear. “Can you behave, doll?”

I nod, but I glare at him, letting him see all my hatred. I need to keep him distracted. Sterling and the others need more time. But I can’t let him hurt Cade and Kai. If I can keep Sam’s focus on me, Cade and Kai can free themselves. Then, after Sterling has had time to save Gracie, I can find the right moment to take Sam by surprise. And I will take him down.

So instead of fighting, I push my love for Kai to him, hoping he picks it up with his empath abilities. For Cade, I smile. It's small and shaky, but it says everything I need to say. Thank you. I love you.

Their fear and panic hurt more than anything. It cuts straight through me; burns with the heat of the sun, makes me want to tear my insides out just so I can't feel it anymore.

I turn away from their wide eyes, unable to look any longer. Sam grabs my arm and tugs me out the door. When I pass Cole, I nod at him, thanking him for everything.

He shakes his head. "Don't do this," he whispers.

I ignore his words, and the sensation of Cade and Kai's gazes on my back, and let Sam drag me down the hall. Their shouts and curses follow me like ghosts that will haunt me for the rest of my life. However long that is. Sam says nothing, but his fingers bite into my skin hard enough to leave bruises.

He leads me past the set of the stairs we used to get to the basement last time we were here. I force down a flash of panic as I wonder where he’s taking me. What if he takes me somewhere out of this building? At least if we're here, the guys will know where I am.

At another set of stairs, Sam drags me down, nearly pulling my arm out of the socket. The doors at the bottom open to a separate room, and my heart stops.

It looks like a medical chamber of some sort. A metal operating table sits in the middle of the space over a drain stained a suspicious shade of copper. Counters and shelves line the walls, various instruments I don’t look at too closely sitting on the white surface.

"On the table," Sam says, nudging me in that direction. I don't move, frozen to the spot, and Sam grabs the back of my neck and pushes me. "On. The. Table."

Gone is the handsome businessman. The monster has taken his place.

My arms and legs shake as I climb onto the metal surface and lie down. Immediately, Sam's magic binds me. I hiss through the pain, fighting back the memory of the last time his magic wrapped around my skin.

I debate the best time to let my magic free, but it doesn't feel right yet. There is nothing in my chest tugging me toward the golden flame I harbor inside of me. As hard as it is, I need to trust my instincts. And right now is not the right time.

Sam takes a scalpel from a rolling tray and his gaze roves over my body. The white fog. I need the fog I used to sink into to survive my encounters with him. I search and search for it, but I can't find it.

My guys have made the fog unnecessary.

Sam places the thin blade above my breast bone and carefully slices through my shirt and bra. The fabric falls away, exposing my rapidly rising and falling chest. Sam's eyes heat and he licks his lower lip.

Where is the fog? I need that fucking fog. I need something to mask the shame and hurt and terror. Something to disappear into so I can't feel my own body or hear my own thoughts.

As Sam slices through my leggings and panties, I squeeze my eyes shut. He doesn't touch me, but his gaze on my exposed flesh is more than enough.

"Where is that magic, doll?"

I take a shaky breath and open my eyes. Instead of answering him, I stare. I let him see that I'm not the same person I was a few months ago. He can threaten me, he can torture me, but I won't cry or beg. I won't flinch or shy away from him.

As his gaze travels over my body again, lingering on the apex of my thighs, I realize I don't need the fog anymore.

My guys are the fog I can sink into. My Shields from the pain. Cade's gentle touch and the way he always makes sure I'm okay, every step of the way. Sterling's passion and the way he consumes every part of me. And Kai. I smile despite the situation. My Kai. Despite his possessive tendencies and the monster that lives under his skin, there is no one I feel safer with.

I feel it then. My magic simmering inside me, just under the surface. I know my eyes have turned golden by the shock on Sam’s face. This man can’t hurt me anymore. He can try all he likes, but he’ll never see me cry again. I smile, letting him see all of that in my golden gaze.

The lack of reaction from me and the smile, lights the fuse. Sam darts forward and grabs my throat, squeezing painfully. "Where is the fucking magic?" Spittle flies from his lips in his anger. As quickly as he grabbed me, he lets go. Taking deep breaths, he tries to calm himself, straightening his black suit jacket with rough tugs. He pulls a radio from the counter and speaks into it. "Bring me Grace."

No. Not Gracie. Please, Sterling. Please have gotten her out of here already. I'm not sure if I can hold out if Sam brings Gracie in.

While we wait, Sam talks. I tune him out. Focusing instead on my guys and the strength they give me. There is still no tug in my chest, so I continue to wait to bring out my magic, but I’m getting antsy. Maybe I’m overestimating my abilities. Maybe that instinct I thought I would feel won’t come. Should I just act now? I want to act now. I want to wipe this miserable excuse for a mage from the face of the earth.

Sam looks at the clock and mutters under his breath. "What the hell is taking so long," he barks into the radio. "Bring me Grace. Now!"

A few minutes later, the radio crackles. "Sorry sir," a breathless voice comes through the speaker. "We're having a bit of a problem." Muffled noises come from the radio before it cuts off.

"What kind of problem?" Sam asks, his voice dark and promising pain.

There’s no response, and I watch as Sam gets angrier and angrier. This is when he becomes dangerous. When his anger takes control, he is liable to do anything.

The next time he looks at me, his brown eyes shimmer with green, the muddy color a sight that haunts me still. I know what happens next will not be good. But there is still no tug in my chest.

Am I waiting for something that isn't going to happen? Are my instincts wrong?

But as soon as Sam takes one step toward me, the door bursts open. Cade rushes in, and the way his face contorts in anger at seeing me bound and naked, makes a thrill rush through me.

"Well, this wasn't planned, but I can certainly use it to my advantage." Sam claps his hands once and smiles.

I've come to realize when he smiles like that, we are always unprepared for what happens next. The thrill inside me turns to fear.

Cade pulls a gun from the waistband of his pants and levels it at Sam.

"I promised Ellis she'd get the chance to kill you." He cocks the gun, the sound loud in the sterile room. "But I'll beg for her forgiveness later."

I jerk as the gun goes off. My ears ring and the breath in my lungs halts. Time seems to slow, and I swear I can see the bullet whizzing through the air toward Sam.

Sam raises his hand and flicks his fingers, like he's shaking water off his skin. The bullet stops mid air, and my stomach drops. Before I can scream, it changes directions and shoots straight for Cade.

He doesn't have time to react. The bullet tears through his chest, a direct hit to his heart.

Stunned, Cade stares at the blood seeping through the wound, a gory red flower blooming on his chest. His violet eyes meet mine and his knees hit the floor.

A scream tears through my throat as he collapses. A scream that comes from the depth of my very soul. It sears my throat and steals my breath. It drags with it a burst of magic. The bands shackling me to the table sizzle and disappear.

I'm on the ground kneeling next to Cade in seconds. His lifeless violet eyes stare at nothing. The blood from the wound has already stopped flowing.

"Cade," I whisper, shaking his body. "Cade, wake up." He's just sleeping. He'll take a breath and his eyes will sparkle again as he smiles at me. Sleeping. He's just ...

A rift opens inside of me. A gaping wound that bleeds ichor into my bloodstream. My Cade. My sweet mage. He's ... gone.

My heart shatters. Millions of pieces of glass slicing through me, drawing blood and shredding me to ribbons. What do I do now? How do I breathe without him?

A fire sparks inside of me. A golden flicker of a candle. I turn my palms up and draw the magic forth. Golden flames hiss to life in my palms, growing bigger until it climbs my arms.

"There it is," Sam breathes in awe.

I raise my gaze from my soul-bonded and slowly stand. Sam's eyes widen when I take a step over Cade's still form and the white and golden wings flare from my back.

"It's too late," I say, my voice foreign to me. It's dull and numb, unfeeling and uncaring. "You'll never escape me now."

He huffs a laugh. "So dramatic. If you think you can best me with your untrained magic, you are sorely mistaken. I will have your blood. I will have your body to use as I please. You will be my slave, whether willingly or not."

"Go ahead and try." Cold. So cold. My voice and my body. As if Cade took all the warmth with him when he left. Left. As if he’s just stepped out of the room for a moment and will be back. I crack even more. Splitting wide open and bleeding freely. My flames spread further, covering all of me now, turning me into a walking golden inferno.

Green magic shoots for me. It's not an attack to harm me, but to restrain me. It wraps around my ankles and wrists, snakes around my throat. As soon as it touches my skin, it turns to smoke.

Sam steps backward, eyes widening. “How did you do that?” Another blast of his magic shoots for me. This one less refined, more something that would knock me out if it landed. He’s getting desperate. It doesn't land. Fire sweeps before me, golden flames hissing and licking. It burns Sam's attack to ash.

“If you thought you’d get away with killing one of my Shields, torturing my sister, raping me, you’re dumber than I thought you were.” My voice remains cold and detached. Even as they get stuck in my throat thinking about Cade. But my fury is burning hotter than anything else. And I need to see Sam dead at my feet.

The first flicker of fear passes through his eyes as he must recognize the seriousness of my words. He takes another step backward and I follow with slow, matching steps. I take too much enjoyment in the way he glances around, looking for something to help him. I never had help those two years he abused me. He won’t find any now.

Another blast of green magic spears for me, and I can taste the terror in it as another puff of smoke erupts in the air when it meets my golden fire.

“Please,” he begs, the whites of his eyes visible in his fear. “We can figure something out.”

My smile is sharp and pointed, all teeth and the promise of death. "It's over, Sam." There is no point in even refuting him. I’m not going to let him live. Not after everything he’s done.

His back hits the wall, a cornered rabbit. His magic is wild around him as he tries anything and everything to get through my golden flames.

The hair that escaped my braid lifts in a phantom breeze. The feathers at my back flutter. My palm tingles and I make a fist. When I open it, the golden sword is clutched in my hand. I spare one glance for the purple gem on the pommel. The same color as Cade's eyes.

Unholy fury spears through me. This man stole too much from me. He took my innocence. He ruined so many years of my life. He gave me trauma I'll never get over.

But Cade's death tops it all. He took my soul-bonded from me. He stole my future, my happiness. He took one of the few good things in my life and destroyed it.

I take a breath and lift the sword. My arm doesn’t shake even though the sword is heavy in my hand. It’s as if it knows what its purpose is for today. It knows it’s taking revenge on someone who has hurt me. Golden fire licks down the blade. Its reflection shines in Sam's wide eyes and I smile.

"Goodbye, Sam."

His magic buffets my fire, but it's not enough. The blade slides effortless through his chest. Through skin and muscle. Past bone. Right into the organ that turned black long ago.

I twist the sword as I pull it free and I watch with impassive eyes as Sam falls to the floor. He blinks at me, green magic fading from his brown eyes.

"Doll," he chokes as blood spews from his mouth and coats his lips and chin.

I sneer. "I was never your doll, you sick bastard." Grasping the hilt like a baseball bat, I swing it down again and again, blood spraying with each hit, splattering my face and arms, until Sam's head rolls from his body.

I stand over him, breathing heavily, making sure he doesn't rise again. I wouldn't put it past him. But he doesn't. I open my hand to drop the sword, and it disappears.

I rush back to Cade and fall to my knees. "Cade," I whisper. My hands are still wreathed in fire when I take his face in my palms. "Cade." My voice breaks, and it cracks me open even more. "I love you." With trembling lips I kiss him one last time.

The dam bursts open. I bury my face in his still chest. My body shakes with the force of my sobbing. Each tear that falls sizzles on my skin.

Empty. I'm so empty inside. Cade is missing. His presence is gone. I don't know how to breathe anymore without him. He was the one who brought me back from the edge. Who will do it now?

I clutch his body, holding it against mine. The despair, the pain; it grows. It turns to heat inside me, and before I know it, great billowing flames roar from my body.

I feed everything into the fire. I want it to consume me. To destroy me. To make the pain go away. Greater and greater it grows.

I close my eyes and hold Cade close. And I burn.