Chapter 61
CHAPTER 61
KAREN
I leaned against the railing on the porch. The view was something I was getting more familiar with. Every day I fell in love with it just a little more. I was content just leaning against the railing and doing nothing. Usually, I was the kind of person that always needed to be doing something, whether it was scrolling on my phone, reading a book, or working in some way.
But lately, I found myself just being in the moment. The ranch’s slower way of life was rubbing off on me. The faint sounds of spring out there were so peaceful. You didn’t need one of those sound machines or a Spotify playlist to help soothe your soul when you lived in a place like this. Birds singing, cows lowing, and horses neighing were all soothing sounds. Even the chickens making their little happy clucks as they scratched at the ground had become a part of my life’s soundtrack. Every sound and smell added to the feeling that everything was just as it should be.
And then I saw him. Cassidy, on Rouge, his old girl, who I thought had long since retired from her riding days. He was the one that told me he hadn’t been able to ride her in years, so I was surprised to see them flying across the field with her mane streaming behind her and him riding bareback.
He was sitting tall, his eyes straight ahead. They looked like they were one unit. Cassidy was grinning like a kid. I couldn’t help but smile as I watched them, my heart skipping at the sight. I didn’t know what had gotten into either of them, but whatever it was, I wasn’t about to miss it.
I made my way down to watch the scene from a better vantage point. Cassidy slowed Rouge to a stop when he saw me leaning against the fence. He slid off her back, landing on the ground. His grin made me smile.
“You should’ve seen us,” he said, running a hand over Rouge’s neck. “I swear, it’s like she was ten years younger. All she needed was a bit of sunshine and a little freedom.”
“I did see you,” I said with a laugh. “I wasn’t sure my eyes were right. I had to walk down here and make sure I was really seeing what I thought I saw.”
Rouge nudged me playfully, snorting as she did.
“Is that right, girl? Did Cassidy finally give you what you wanted?” I leaned in to kiss her soft nose. “You’re a good girl,” I murmured. “Just try to keep him in one piece, okay?”
Cassidy laughed, pulling his hat off and running his hand through his hair before he put it back on. “She’s tougher than she looks. Just like you, Karen.”
“Oh, don’t you start flattering me now, Cassidy Scott,” I said.
“Just calling it like I see it,” he replied.
I walked with him to the barn. I fed Rouge a carrot while Cassidy filled up her feed bin. “She’s probably going to rest,” he said. “She doesn’t think she needs to, but I know she will eventually.”
“She looked like she was having the time of her life out there.”
“She was,” he said. “She’s still got that fire in her.”
“Looked like you were having the time of your life as well.”
He grinned. “I most definitely was. I also feel ten years younger.”
After we got Rouge settled, Cassidy pulled me into his arms. I could smell his uniquely masculine scent. It was a combination of his deodorant, a little sweat, fresh air, and horse. I loved it. It didn’t stink. It was all him.
“How are you feeling?” he asked.
“Good. Better than I was this morning.”
“Were you in the office?”
“Yes,” I sighed.
“That doesn’t sound good.”
“It’s not great,” I replied.
He wrapped his arm around my waist as we walked out of the barn. Kenny joined us.
“How is she?” Kenny asked.
“She’s fine,” Cassidy replied. “I told you she was loving it. She wanted to ride.”
“Bareback no less,” Kenny said with a shake of his head. “You’re damn lucky she didn’t throw you.”
Cassidy chuckled. “She wouldn’t do that. We understand each other.”
Kenny still looked skeptical but he smiled. “It’s good to see some life in her again.”
The crew that had been repairing the massive hole in the side of the lodge was packing up as we approached. The scaffolding was still up but there was good progress. The window was in and there was just some outside touch-ups that needed to be taken care of. The ranch was slowly getting back to normal.
Kenny opened the door for us. Cassidy and I went upstairs so he could clean up before dinner. I sat on the bed and watched him change his shirt. Getting to watch him dress and undress were the highlights of my day. Well, technically the highlights were when we crawled into bed together and made love, but the bonus was getting to see him change.
“Woman, your bedroom eyes are hard to resist,” he said when he caught me looking.
“I would say it’s you that’s hard to resist.”
“You keep looking at me like that and we’re going to be eating cold leftovers. Again.”
I grinned. “The last leftovers weren’t so bad.”
“Tonight is lasagna night,” he said. “I don’t want leftover lasagna. I want it fresh and gooey, and I know you do too.”
I sighed. “I’ve been inside smelling it all day. Yes, I am pretty hungry.”
“Then let’s get our butts downstairs before Kenny eats it all.”
We made our way to the dining hall where Ginny was already seated at a table with Kenny. It was a good feeling—being here, being part of this new family. Ginny, Kenny, and Bodie were all like my sister and brothers. All of them had started to feel like my family in a way I hadn’t known I needed. I had my friends back in Dallas, but they were back in Dallas. This was a different dynamic. We were all different, but we all had the same goal—make the ranch successful.
We all had a part to play.
Cassidy and I made our way to the buffet line and loaded up with lasagna, fresh bread, and a green salad. My eyes might be bigger than my stomach, but not for long. Bodie’s cooking was dangerous. We took our seat at the table with the rest of the staff.
Laughter and conversation filled the air as everyone shared stories from their day.
“You should have seen Cassidy and Rouge out there today,” I said, nudging Cassidy with my elbow. “They were quite the pair.”
“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen Rouge that spirited,” Kenny said.
“I can’t believe you rode her,” Ginny said.
Cassidy smiled, a hint of pride lighting up his face. “She’s still got it, doesn’t she? Just needs a bit of reminding now and then. I told all of you she just needed spring. She always bounces back in the spring.”
“How’s the peanut?” Ginny asked me, referring to the baby.
“The appointment went fine. I’ve got my first ultrasound appointment coming up. The doctor wants to get an early peek.”
Ginny’s face lit up. “Oh, Karen! How exciting! Are you ready to see the little one?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” I said. “I keep saying it doesn’t feel real, but maybe seeing it—seeing this tiny life we’re creating—will make it feel more solid.”
Cassidy wrapped an arm around me, giving my shoulder a gentle squeeze. “It’s going to be as real as it gets. I can’t wait to see the little guy. Or gal.”
When he looked at me like that, all the nerves seemed to melt away. His confidence had a way of steadying me that I hadn’t expected when we first met. He went from trying to run as fast and far as he could to being the one calming me down. Now, I couldn’t imagine doing any of this without him.
Eventually, as usual, talk turned to the ranch and the future. A darkness fell over the table.
“You were doing the books today?” Ginny asked me.
I nodded, hoping they didn’t ask me to tell them the truth. “Yes.”
“And?” Kenny prompted.
“We’re still pretty far in the hole.”
They all sighed.
“I just worry about what that debt really means,” Cassidy said. “It’s a big weight to carry, and we’re not even sure what we’re up against.”
“Has he talked to you at all about it?” I asked. “I know he’s been keeping to himself, but has he said anything to you? I’ve told him what the numbers say, but he doesn’t want to talk to me about it.”
Cassidy shook his head. “Not a word. And every time I try to bring it up, he just clams up. Says he’ll handle it when the time is right, but I don’t know when that’ll be. I think he’s worried it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
I swallowed, glancing down at my plate. A wave of worry settled in my stomach. Uncle Don had been so distant lately. He barely even looked at me, which was not like him. He was always so friendly and bubbly. When I tried to ask him how we were going to cover the rest of the repair costs, he just muttered something about needing time to wrap his head around it. If he didn’t get his head around it soon, his head was going to be under it.
“What if there’s no way to cover it? I mean, what if the ranch has to go up for sale?” I hated to even voice the concern, but every day I crunched numbers, the more it was looking like that might be the case.
Cassidy’s jaw clenched. The ranch was more than a piece of land to him. It was home. It was the only place he’d ever felt like he truly belonged, and the thought of it slipping out of reach felt unbearable. We had spent many nights talking about it.
“No,” he said. I could tell he was saying it more for himself than anyone else. “We’re not losing it. We can’t. I don’t know what it’ll take, but we’ll figure it out. Somehow.”
The room grew quiet as we all processed that. I hated that I was the one that cast a pall over the delicious meal. It was a sobering reminder that as much as we loved this place, we were all at the mercy of the numbers, and those numbers weren’t in our favor. It was easy to blame it on Earl. His drunken mistake had wiped out any money we made while wiping out revenue for the last month because the lodge wasn’t safe for guests. It was infuriating, but there was little we could do about it. We just had to accept it and keep moving forward.
I slid my hand under the table and put my hand on his thigh. He looked at me and offered a half smile, but the stress was visible in his eyes. He was the one that would take this the hardest.
As I ate, I listened to Ginny and Kenny playfully teasing each other. Sitting at the table with them, I couldn’t imagine myself being anywhere else. I couldn’t help but wonder what my life would be like if I had never left Dallas. What would have happened if I never took the chance and come to Kentucky?
I wouldn’t be pregnant, and I wouldn’t have fallen for my country boy.
“Karen. Cassidy. Could you come with me for a minute?” Uncle Don asked.
The table went silent. All eyes turned to us. I felt a sinking feeling settle over me. The tone of his voice wasn’t casual. I could see the tension in his face. The worry lines had deepened, and the usual warmth was gone.
“Sure,” I said.
Cassidy and I exchanged a look. Ginny and Kenny gave us sympathetic glances, like they were worried about what was coming. I felt like we just got called into the principal’s office. It felt like a long, slow march toward something inevitable. Like we were about to hear something that could change everything.
I didn’t think I wanted to hear it. It was obviously bad news. No one got good news in private.