Chapter 17
Finn
I woke up with so much excitement, and now I have a sense of dread as I look down at my phone and see who’s on the caller ID. My brother, Jackson. One minute, I’m so excited for my weekend with Riley, whether it’s under the pretense of work or not, and the next, I’m worried that someone died, because why else would my brother be calling me? I consider letting it go to voicemail and dealing with it on Monday so nothing will ruin my weekend, but think better of it, considering what my fear is.
“Hello?” I ask hesitantly.
“Hey, man! How’s it going?!” Okay, way too chipper for someone to be dead.
“Good, is everything okay?” I clip.
“Yeaaah… why wouldn’t it be?”
Now I’m really irritated and having a hard time not letting it show. “I dunno, Jackson, maybe because you don’t just call me to shoot the breeze. I actually can’t even remember the last time you did call me. I didn’t even realize you had my number.”
He lets out a long sigh. “Well, I got your number from Mom, and everything you said is totally fair, which is actually why I’m calling.”
I don’t know what to say, so I don’t say anything at all and just force him to continue.
“Okay, I deserve the silent treatment, but listen, I don’t know if Mom mentioned that I’m back from college and working in the city.”
Did she mention it? Oh, she mentioned it, alright. Totally ruined my day, too, with the way she called to rub it in my face how well he’s doing and how I don’t quite measure up to her and Dad’s standards. I was in my head for days after that conversation.
“Yeah, she might have mentioned something like that.”
“Cool, cool. Well, look, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I really miss my big bro. Do you think maybe you can let me take you out to lunch and we can just talk? Just hear me out and you can tell me to piss off after, for not keeping in contact, but please? I’ll even come to you. You’re in Evergreen Ridge, right?”
Well, it looks like he’s still as close to Mom as ever. I’d be lying, though, if I said I didn’t think about him all the time and what our relationship would be like if our parents hadn’t pitted us against each other all the time. However, I don’t know that I want him coming to Evergreen. It’s my sanctuary right now, and I don’t want it to be tainted. So, against my better judgment, since this weekend is supposed to be all about Riley, I say, “Yeah I’m over in Evergreen, but I’m actually heading into the city now and I’ll be there over the weekend if you want to meet up then.”
“Really?”
“Yup,” I reply with an emphasis on the ‘P.’
“Okay, cool, cool. Sounds good. Well, how does Sunday for brunch sound?”
“Sounds good. I can make that work.” It won’t take much time away from Riley, and I can pick a restaurant close to some antique stores. “I’ll text you tomorrow with details on where and what time to meet me. I’m going to have a coworker with me, so I can’t stray too far from our hotel.”
“Thanks, bro, I really appreciate it. I’m looking forward to seeing you.”
“See you then. Bye.”
I really didn’t want to be distracted like this while kicking off this weekend, but here I am. I picked up Riley from her house about twenty minutes ago and lugged her one-hundred pound overnight bag into the back of my truck, and I didn’t even make a joke about there being a dead body in there. I know she can tell something is up by the way she keeps glancing over at me, and I need to get my head out of my rear.
This is supposed to be an awesome weekend away for her to get some inspiration and some much needed rest. Not for her to feel awkward and uncomfortable as I bring down the mood. I’ll take two more minutes to brood, then I’ll start a nice light conversation with her, and we’ll get this weekend kicked off like it was really meant to be. Except she beats me to it.
“What’s wrong, Finn? I can tell something’s on your mind.”
“No, nothing’s wrong, just tired and need a little caffeine pick-me-up.” There, that should steer things in the right direction.
She’s quiet for a beat, and I can’t see the look on her face because I’m concentrating on the road, but then she says, “Please don’t lie to me. It’s fine to say you don’t want to talk about something, and I’ll never press, but please don’t ever lie.”
I’m stunned by her words, and guilt washes through me, but she’s right. We’re trying to get to know each other, and she just poured her heart out to me about her childhood a couple of weeks ago. I owe her the respect of being up front with her, even if I don’t want to talk about it. But as I’m sitting here, I do want to talk to her about it. She’s actually the only person I really want to talk to about this because I think she’ll understand.
“My brother called me on my way here, so I’m just a bit in my thoughts. Sorry.”
“So, I take it your brother calling wasn’t a good thing? And please don’t apologize, you’re allowed to be in your thoughts, Finn. Lord knows I always am.”
I smile at that because it’s actually something I do know about her. “Thanks, Riles, that means a lot, and no, it’s not like it’s the worst thing, but we’re just not close. At all. We actually haven’t talked in years, now that I think about it, and he called and wants to talk.”
“How do you feel about that?”
Such a simple question with such a nuanced answer.
“Honestly, at first, I was pissed off. He hasn’t spoken to me in years. Now he’s home from college, with a job at a hot shot law firm, and he wants to talk to me. Then it made me sad because we were actually close when we were really little. I remember riding bikes and playing at the park, but then once we got old enough, our parents started comparing us when it came to absolutely everything. Sports, extracurriculars, and especially school.
“When he went off to college, I was dropping out to start my own business. The disappointment was palpable. I was packing up my stuff to move out—my parents wouldn’t let me live at home if I wasn’t going to be in school—and I overheard them saying how much of a disappointment I was for dropping out and why couldn’t I be like Jackson. Essentially, it’s sad that my little brother was the role model when it should have been me as the oldest, and they hoped my poor work ethic didn’t rub off on Jackson.
“So, when he left for college, my mom made sure they stayed thick as thieves and I stayed on the outs. They wouldn’t want me putting any silly ideas in his brain, so they basically did all they could to keep us apart, and Jackson went along with it. If I’m honest, I didn’t fight that hard, but I guess I was hurt that it was so easy for him to ditch me. He sounded somewhat remorseful on the phone, and he says he wants a chance to explain.
“I was going to tell him to piss off, but my curiosity won out. I also didn’t want him to come to Evergreen. I’ve fallen in love with that town, and it’s become sort of my safe space, so I told him that I would meet him for brunch on Sunday. I hope that’s okay. I figured that you could peruse some antique shops. I can’t imagine what he has to say to me, so I don’t foresee it going that long.” I blow out a breath, waiting for her to say something. She’s been quiet for a few seconds. I hope she’s not upset about me ditching her for this brunch. I should just call him and really tell him to piss off; Riley’s more important.
Instead, she reaches over to where I am resting my arm on the center console and places her hand on my exposed forearm. I immediately feel the electricity that I normally do every time we touch. We’re on a straightaway, so I glance over at her, and she’s staring at me with an emotion in her eyes that I can’t quite pinpoint.
“Finn, thank you for telling me all of that. I know how hard it can be to share stuff like that. It’s something I’m still trying to learn to do, so thank you.”
“Welcome.” She still hasn’t removed her hand, and I hope she never does.
“First of all, please don’t ever let what your parents said affect you. It’s just about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Not everyone is made for college, and why would you need college if you have a successful business without it?”
“Well, my parents didn’t want me to own a construction business. They wanted me to be a doctor, or a lawyer, like my brother.”
I can tell she’s thinking. “So, essentially, they wanted you to do exactly what they wanted and when you didn’t, they separated you from the family.”
Ouch, this girl doesn’t hold any punches, but that’s essentially what happened. “Basically, yeah.”
“Well, I know I told you about my dad, and the biggest thing that I’ve learned through all of that is that love is never supposed to be conditional. You love someone because of who they are, not who you want them to be. If they can’t do that, then… What was it you said about my dad? Oh yeah, screw them.
“I haven’t known you that long, but ever since I’ve known you, I’ve looked up to you. You run a successful business while having a heart for this small town that isn’t even your own. Not only that, you believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself, and you took the time to help me get this job and build my confidence. It may not be happening quickly, but it’s happening, and that’s in part because of you. You’re successful, and you’re smart and you’re kind, and don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise. Or I’ll take the body out of my suitcase and replace it with theirs.”
I bark out a laugh, already feeling lighter. “Oh, thank God you said it. I was too broody earlier to make the comparison, but what the heck do you have in that thing?”
She laughs, and it’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. “Just my stuff, but I’m not done. Second of all, I’d never be upset about you going to meet your brother. Do you want me to go with you?”
“You’d do that?”
“Sure, I don’t have to stay the whole time. I know you guys are supposed to talk about private stuff, but if you need me there in the beginning to break the ice, I’ll be there. You can give me some kind of signal, and I can kick rocks and find a store to browse around until you’re done.”
“That would be really great, Riles. Thanks.”
She gives my forearm a squeeze and lets go. I immediately miss her touch. Great, now I’m going to be thinking about that touch and what it does to me for the rest of the two and a half hour drive to the city.