Through the Flames (The Lost Letters #1)

29. Noah

Chapter 29

Noah

“ N o!” Nellie screams. “I want to stay here!”

My heart is breaking for her. She’s trying to get inside the house through the locked back door and isn’t getting anywhere. Lilly has tried everything to get her to understand why they can’t stay, but it hasn’t gotten through to her.

I’m standing off to the side, a useless spectator in the battle being waged in front of me. Lilly is starting to get frustrated. She’s kneeling on the ground, her butt resting on her heels with her fists clenched against her knees. Angry tears are welling in her eyes, and I reach my breaking point. I step into the fray as Nellie rages at the injustice of her world.

She lunges for Lilly, and I get between them, taking the brunt of Nellie’s anger. I drop to my knees and wrap my arm around Nellie’s little body. She fights against me, not to get away, but to get her frustrations out. My ribs scream in protest as I keep the pressure steady. The heavy dose of painkillers the hospital gave me is likely the only reason I’m able to keep this up.

Slowly, Nellie begins to relax. I keep holding her, wishing I had the use of both arms. I won’t let her go until she’s ready to stand on her own feet. When her head drops onto my shoulder, I know she’s given up the fight. Her tears rip me in two, her sobs making her back heave. I’d do just about anything to get rid of her sadness.

“My darling Baby Bee,” I whisper into her hair. She smells like strawberries in the summer. Lilly’s forehead drops onto my back, and I’d give up my entire world to hug them both to my chest. Instead, Lilly’s arms wrap around my stomach. I soak up every minute with the two people I love most in the world.

Lilly moves around to my side. “What are you feeling, baby girl?”

Nellie turns her head, where it’s tucked into my neck, to look at her mom. “Uncomfortable. Sad. My body is going to explode.”

“Do you want Dad to keep squeezing you?”

She nods. “I need my blanket.”

Lilly gives her a small smile. “Okay, I’ll ask Cooper to get it for you.”

“Why can’t I go get it?” Nellie whines.

“Because a bad man made a huge mess in our house. If we go in there right now, they won’t be able to find out who did it,” Lilly explains. “That’s why we have to stay with Gram and Pop tonight. The bad man broke our beds, and we can’t sleep on them.”

“I don’t want a new bed,” Nellie cries.

Tears burn behind my eyes. I wish I could snap my fingers and fix it for her.

“I promise, we will get the exact same bed as before. You’ll still be able to sleep by my side.”

Nellie looks at her mom with all the trust in the world. “You swear?”

“I swear. But first, we have to have a sleepover with Gram and Pop. Your uncle Carson is going to be there, too.”

Nellie’s eyes grow wide. “He is?”

We haven’t had a chance to introduce Nellie to Carson yet, and she’s been demanding to meet him since she met Mom and Dad at the library.

“Yep. So, how about I go get your blanket while you and Dad pack the car? Cooper got all your stuffies for you. They’re in that suitcase.” Lilly points to a purple tie-dye roller bag on the patio.

“Okay.” Nellie stays wrapped around me, not seeming to be in too big of a hurry. I’m not complaining in the slightest.

Lilly kisses the top of Nellie’s head. “I love you, baby girl.”

“I love you, too, Mommy.”

With a breath of relief, Lilly goes around to the front door. She could’ve knocked on the back door, but I’m guessing she needs a minute to recalibrate.

“Are you ready to load the car?” I ask Nellie.

“One more squeeze,” she says into my neck. I tighten my muscles, ignoring the stab of pain. I let out a fake groan that makes Nellie giggle. The sound soothes the raw edges of my nerves. When she releases her hold on me, I let her go. She gets the purple suitcase while I roll the larger black one across the yard.

I’m getting Nellie into the car when Lilly comes out of the house with a brown blanket in her arms. She tucks it around Nellie once she’s buckled into the seat and then closes the door. Before Lilly can turn away, I grab her chin and kiss her. I keep it chaste, but I still give her every ounce of love I can muster.

“Are we good?” I ask.

Lilly’s eyebrows furrow. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

“I got in the middle of that without asking. I just want to make sure it was okay.”

“It was perfect. You stepped in when I needed you the most. You have no idea how long I’ve wished someone would do that for me.”

I wrap my arm around Lilly’s shoulders and pull her into my chest. “You’ll need to drive. I’m still on some heavy meds.”

Lilly rears back, her eyes wide. “Oh, Noah. You must be in so much pain.”

I lift one shoulder. I’m not comfortable, but I’d put myself through worse if it would help my girls. “I’m fine. Let’s just get out of here.”

The smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies greets us as we walk into Mom and Dad’s house. The house hasn’t changed a bit since I was a kid. The front door leads right into the living room, and off to the left, against the wall, are the stairs up to our bedrooms.

I lead my family past the stairs and down the hall toward the kitchen at the back of the house, where Mom is pulling a sheet of cookies out of the oven. The smell is even stronger now that they’re sitting on the counter.

“Hi, my darlings.” Mom chucks her oven mitt onto the counter and wraps Lilly in a hug first. “The two of you have had a busy day.”

I snort. “To say the least.”

She hugs me, too, before turning to Nellie. “Would you be interested in a chocolate chip cookie?”

Nellie frowns. “I haven’t had dinner yet.”

Mom, Lilly, and I glance at each other. We’re all trying to keep from laughing. “How about you have one while I whip up something for you to eat?”

Nellie shrugs. “Okay.”

Mom sets her up at the table with a cookie, headphones, and a book. Lilly and I sit at the peninsula between the kitchen and dining room with our own treats.

“Are you sure I can’t help you?” Lilly asks again.

“Positive. You sit there and let me pamper you for a bit. Today has been an awful day.”

“Do you have any idea who could’ve done this?” I ask Lilly.

She shakes her head. “My only guess is it has something to do with my parents. There’s no way this is a coincidence.”

“Agreed. I’m just glad you weren’t home. Talk about scary.”

“I think…” Lilly looks over her shoulder at Nellie. She looks adorable with her headphones on and a smudge of chocolate in the corner of her mouth. “I think they were looking for something. Everything in the house had been dumped out or gone through. It was a mess, but they didn’t destroy things just to destroy them. It seemed purposeful.”

Mom leans over the counter, her faint burn scars stretching across her skin. Around the time I was adopted, an arsonist set Mom’s house on fire. It took her a long time to wear short sleeves afterward.

“And Cooper hasn’t found any leads?” Mom asks.

“He hasn’t said anything if he has.” Lilly shrugs.

Mom turns her fierce gaze to me. “What happened at the fire today?”

I grimace. She’s giving Lilly a break from talking about the shitty things she can’t control, but I don’t want her attention on me any more than I want it on Lilly.

“Yeah, how the hell did this happen?” Lilly raises her eyebrows at me.

I give in to their stares and tell them all about my clumsiness. “We figured out that a straightener was left on and caught the hand towel on fire. The teenager was having a seizure and couldn’t do anything about it. Scary stuff.”

“Aww. That poor girl. I’m glad they had a security system in place,” Mom says as she continues making dinner.

The topic turns to Nellie and Lilly’s plans for the rest of the summer and continues from there. We keep things light-hearted, especially when Nellie joins in on the conversation. It’s relieving to see her back to her normal self. There isn’t even a whiff of the angry girl she was an hour ago.

I’ve always thought Lilly was Wonder Woman, but knowing how emotionally and physically draining it was to go through that, I’m blown away by Lilly’s strength.

Dad and Carson make it home right when dinner’s ready. Nellie and Carson connect immediately over a book series Nellie is reading. It’s heart-warming watching the two of them bond. We chat throughout dinner as if we’ve been eating together forever.

For as eventful and draining as the day was, this moment might make up for all of it.

We show Nellie around the house, and she asks a million questions about growing up here. In my old bedroom, Mom has set up an air mattress for Nellie and pushed it right next to my queen bed. It’s as close to a trundle bed as she could’ve gotten, and all I can do is hug her for being the best Mom.

After goodnight hugs and getting Nellie settled, Lilly and I snuggle in my bed despite it still being early.

“While my fantasy never included our daughter in a bed next to us, I’ve got to say this is a dream come true,” I whisper in Lilly’s ear.

She snorts before slapping a hand over her mouth to keep quiet. “I’m going to dig through your drawers now to find something juicy.”

I scrunch my face as I think. “I’m pretty sure I emptied all the embarrassing stuff when I went to the academy, but you’re welcome to look.”

She humphs and then turns over to look in my nightstand. She pulls out a manila envelope, and for half a second, I’m not sure what’s in it. Then it hits me.

“Nope. Not that.” I snatch it out of her hand.

“Hey,” she whisper-yells. “Lemme see it.”

“Nuh-uh.” I’m tempted to rip up the letters I wrote to her over the years, but I can’t get myself to do it.

“If you won’t let me look at it, then tell me what it is.”

“I’m not sure I can do that either.”

She narrows her eyes. “What will it take?”

A devilish smile spreads across my face. “You wanna make a bargain?”

“I don’t like that look in your eye. What are the terms?”

“On the day you marry me, I’ll let you read these.”

Lilly’s mouth drops open. “Is that supposed to be a proposal?”

I roll my eyes. “Of course not, but I will only let you read these on the day we get married.”

She bites her bottom lip. “Fine. I get to read whatever is in there if we get married.”

I shake my head at her. “Not if. When.”