What About Now (Everlasting Ink #4)

Chapter 10

CHAPTER

TEN

Maddox

For the first time in my life, I want to celebrate Valentine’s Day. I’ve dotted all my i’s and crossed all my t’s. I’ve planned the perfect date for me and my wife. We’re having dinner at one of her favorite restaurants. I was lucky I was able to get last-minute reservations because I didn’t find out until dinner at my parents’ house last week when she was talking to my mom that Mario’s Italian restaurant in Nashville was one of her favorites. Her dad used to take Briar and Brogan there when they were celebrating, and tonight, we have something to celebrate.

Us.

She has no idea where we are going, only that we’re going out and how to dress. “Brogan!” I call out to her. “I’m going to run uptown and fill the truck up. I’ll be back in less than twenty,” I tell her.

She sticks her head out of the bedroom door. “We can just stop on the way to save you a trip.”

“Nah, it’s fine. I don’t mind.” I walk toward her because when my wife is near, I have to be close to her. It’s an addiction that she’s thankfully supporting. I bend and kiss her lips. “I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, silly man.” She shakes her head and disappears back into the bedroom to finish getting ready.

After rushing out of the house, I head to town. Not to get gas, I did that last night on my way home from the shop. I make it to the florist just as they close to pick up the bouquet of red roses I ordered.

When I get back to the house, I ring the doorbell instead of going inside. When Brogan answers, she looks confused but so fucking beautiful. She’s wearing a black dress that hugs her curves, and her hair hangs in loose curls down her back.

“You’re beautiful,” I tell her.

She blushes. “Thank you. What are you doing ringing the doorbell? Did you forget your key?”

“I’m picking my girl up for a date.” I watch as my words sink in, and her eyes soften.

“Maddox.” She places her hand over her heart and her eyes shimmer with tears.

“These are for you.” I hand her the flowers and peck her cheek with a kiss. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“They’re beautiful.” She smiles up at me. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” she says shyly.

“They don’t compare to you.”

“I’ve already agreed to dinner,” she teases.

“Another first,” I tell her, and her smile lights up the entire fucking sky.

“Come on in and I’ll put this inside.” She stares down at the vase, because I remembered from last time.

She carries the flowers to the kitchen and places them on the island. I stand back and watch as she pulls out her phone and takes a couple of pictures before turning to face me.

“You ready?”

“I am. Still no hints as to where we’re going?” she asks.

“My lips are sealed. I can tell you we’re headed to Nashville.”

“Nashville. The possibilities are endless.”

“Exactly.” I help her into her coat before offering her my arm. She takes it without hesitation and leans into me as I walk her out to my truck. “My lady,” I say, opening the door for her.

“Thank you, Mad,” she whispers.

I nod and rush around to my side of the truck. “That scarf is pretty. It brings out your eyes,” I tell her.

“Thank you. I, um, I actually made it.”

“What? You made that?” I ask, taking another quick glance at her, before turning my eyes back onto the road.

“Yeah, I used to crochet a lot. I know it’s nerdy, but it’s relaxing for me. I got back into it pretty heavily when Briar and the girls moved out. It helped pass the loneliness.”

“I’ve not seen you do it.”

“It’s been a while, well, since you moved in, actually.”

“Why? If it’s something that you enjoy?”

“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t want to show you the nerdy me.”

“Brogan, I want every piece of you.” I reach over and rest my hand on her thigh. “There isn’t a single hobby you could have that would make me not want to be right next to you while you do it.”

“Right.” She laughs. “Like you want to sit beside me while I crochet each night?” She says it like the thought is preposterous, when in reality, we could be staring at the blank wall, and I’d be thrilled to be next to her. That’s how far I’ve fallen for my wife.

“Why not? You enjoy it. Of course I’d want to watch you do something you love. Maybe I can even convince you to make me something.”

“You don’t have to say that.”

“I mean it. It’s cold as hell this time of year.” She’s quiet for several minutes.

“What kind of wife would I be if I didn’t make something for my husband?”

My heart hammers in my chest and I swallow hard. Fuck me, does she understand what it does to me when she refers to me as her husband? “Mine,” I tell her. “You’d be mine, and no pressure,” I answer.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you.”

“You haven’t even seen it yet,” she says, and I can hear the humor in her tone.

“I’ve seen yours. I know you’re incredible. It’s going to be great.”

“What about you? Any secret hobbies I don’t know about?”

“Nah, I like to draw. Hence the job, but other than that, just hanging out with the guys. We used to go fishing a lot when we were younger, but once we were old enough to drink, we’d just chill at someone’s house, usually Forrest’s because he would have Emerson.”

“I’ve never had a lot of friends. I had Briar, and that was enough for me. However, I can admit it’s nice to have Emerson, Monroe, and Maggie added to that list.”

“And me. Did I make the list?”

“Are you my friend?” she asks, teasing.

“If by friend you mean I get to kiss the air from your lungs and touch every inch of your sexy body, then, yeah, beautiful, we’re the best of friends.”

Her laughter fills the cab of my truck, and I wish I could record the sound to play for times when she’s not with me.

“Mario’s. We’re going to Mario’s,” she says, as I pull my truck into the lot.

“Your favorite, right?”

She nods, tears welling in her eyes. “The last time I was here was our high school graduation. Right before our dad was diagnosed with cancer.”

“We can go somewhere else.” Fuck, I didn’t think about this place bringing up painful memories for her.

“No. Please, no. I want to be here.” She takes off her seat belt and turns to face me. “I don’t know how you always know what I need, Maddox Lanigan, but this, it’s perfect. This was our special place, and now I get to share it with you.”

Pride swells in my chest that I get to share a good memory of her past with her. Maybe we’ll make this a tradition with our kids, a special place to go when we celebrate. We can tell them it’s where their grandpa used to take their mom, and where we went on our first date. I know I’m getting ahead of myself, but I can see it. “He would be proud of you and the woman you’ve become.”

She blinks her tears away, and fans at her face with her hands. “Don’t make me cry before we go in there.” She smiles. “This is perfect, Maddox. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now, stay put. I’ll get your door.”

“I’d expect nothing less from the man I married.” She gives me a watery smile, and I feel that smile in my chest. It fists my heart, gripping tightly, refusing to let go. Not that I want it to.

I rush around the truck, open her door for her, then lead her into the restaurant with my hand on the small of her back. When we reach the hostess, Brogan speaks for us, which surprises me.

“Reservation for Lanigan.”

I squeeze her hip because fuck, each day she accepts this, us, a little more, and my hope builds. We’re building a life together. We’re working on forever.

“Tonight was amazing,” Brogan says, as we’re making our way to the bedroom. “I’d forgotten how much I love their food.”

“It was the first time for me, but we will definitely be going back. Maybe we can take Briar, Forrest, and the girls with us next time?” I suggest.

She turns to look at me, hope in her big green eyes. “I’d love that, Maddox.”

“You ready for bed?”

“Yes. My belly is full, and I could crash.”

“Need a lift?” I ask her.

She grins. “I think I can manage.” She steps closer, stands on her tiptoes, and kisses me. “Thank you for the best Valentine’s Day and first date a girl could ask for.”

“First date?”

“As an adult. Prom doesn’t count.”

“Only our time together counts.” I nod.

“Come on. Let’s go to bed.” She holds her hand out for me, and I take it, allowing her to lead us to the bedroom. Once we step inside, she turns on the bedside lamp and looks at me over her shoulder. “Can you unzip me?”

My steps feel sluggish as I walk toward her. Lifting her hair, I gather it all to one side and place it over her left shoulder. “How did you get this on without me?” I reach for the zipper.

“Talent, I guess.” Her tone is light and carefree, something I’m getting to see more and more of from her.

“And now?” I ask, bending to place a kiss on her bare skin as I continue to lower the zipper.

“Now you’ve seen me in the dress, and there’s no point in twisting myself into a pretzel to surprise you.”

I keep my eyes on her exposed skin as the zipper continues to lower. I can’t resist running my index finger up her spine once finished. “Do you need more help?”

“You know, I might.”

“Tell me what you need, Brogan?” My voice is husky and full of desire for her.

“My bra, can you unhook that for me?” she asks. Her voice is soft and hesitant, but she still speaks up to tell me what she wants.

My hands move to her bra, and I unhook it easily. “What about this?” I say, tugging her dress at her shoulders. “Do you need help with this?”

She glances at me over her shoulder, and her big green eyes are full of need. “Do you mind?”

“Anything for my wife.” Slowly, I peel her dress off each shoulder, and it pools at her waist. Her bra is strapless, and it falls to the floor when she lifts her arms. “How’s that?” I ask, my hands skimming her sides.

“I might need more help,” she says. Her voice shakes with her nerves.

I kiss her bare shoulder. “We can stop if this is too much.”

“No.” She shakes her head as if her no doesn’t get her point across. She turns to face me, and it takes every ounce of willpower inside me to keep my eyes on her face and not her bare tits.

I don’t know what I’m expecting, but it’s not for her to shimmy her hips and let her dress fall to the floor. This time, I can’t hold back. My eyes scan her from head to toe. She’s in nothing but a pair of black silk panties, and my mouth waters, while my cock presses painfully against the zipper of these black jeans I’m wearing.

“Tell me,” I husk.

“I think I still need some help.”

“My help?” I need her to spell it out for me. The last thing I want to do is scare her off after all the progress we’ve made.

“Only yours, Maddox.”

“Only mine.” I drop to my knees, place my hands on her hips, and press a kiss to her quivering belly. I peer up at her to find her watching me. “You’re beautiful, Brogan.” Her lips quirk up in a shy smile, and that’s my cue to keep going. I grip her silk panties and pull. They slide over her hips and thighs with ease. As she steps out of them, I toss them to the side.

“Brogan,” I rasp. I can smell her arousal.

“Show me.”

“Show you what, baby?”

“Show me what you want to do to me.”

“So many things,” I tell her. My lips find their way to her soft skin, just above her pussy. She sucks in a breath, causing me to pull back and peer up at her. “We don’t have to.”

“I want to. I just… I don’t know how far….” Her voice trails off.

“You hold all the power here, Brogan. You tell me what you want, and that’s what you’ll get. Nothing more, nothing less. This is all you.”

“No one has ever touched me… there. Just you.”

I swallow hard. I know how big this is for her. She’s putting her trust in me, something she doesn’t give easily. “How about we get into bed?” I suggest. I need to slow this down. I know she wants this, but does that mean she’s ready? I need to give her some time to change her mind.

“Oh.” Her hands cover her breasts, and she looks like I slapped her.

“Hey.” I scramble to climb to my feet. “Not because I don’t want to. I want you to be comfortable. I thought the bed might be better. You might not feel so exposed under the covers.”

“Right. Of course.”

“Brogan, I could devour you for hours, baby, and I am not tired of tasting, looking at, or feeling you, but we have time to take this slower. I don’t expect anything.”

“Are you going to get into bed like that?” She nods to where I’m still fully clothed.

“You want to help me?” I ask.

She nods, and I drop my hands to my sides. I watch as she raises her shaky hands and fumbles to unbutton my shirt. Needing to be connected to her, I grip her hips and pull her closer. She laughs, and that seems to help ease some of her nerves as she manages to finish the last button and push my shirt from my shoulders. It falls to the floor, and I reach behind my neck, grabbing my T-shirt and chucking it.

“You still have work to do.” I wink at her, and she smiles, her shoulders relaxing even further.

She moves to the button of my jeans and makes quick work of the button and zipper. She grips my waistband and tugs, taking my boxer briefs and jeans at the same time.

“Oh,” she says, surprised, when my hard cock slaps against my bare abs.

“All for you,” I tell her.

I kick at my jeans until they’re off and flying across the bedroom. Brogan stands before me. Her gaze is zeroed in on my cock.

“Does it hurt?”

“Not in a bad way.”

“Can I?”

I slide my hand behind her neck, and she looks at me. “Anything you want, Brogan.”

She reaches out and grips me.

“Tighter,” I instruct. She tightens her hold, and I groan at the feel of her soft hands around me.

“Are you sure I’m not hurting you?” she asks.

I bite the inside of my cheek, and shake my head. I need to give her this time to explore, but fuck me, I’m ready to lose control. Needing a distraction, I lift my hand to her breast, running the pad of my thumb over her hard nipple. She closes her eyes and tilts her head back, never letting go of my cock that she’s softly stroking.

“Bed, baby.”

She releases me and dives for the bed, climbing under the covers, and I follow her, pulling her naked body against my own. “You were made for me,” I tell her, running my hands over her.

“Why do you say that?”

“Because I’ve never craved the feel of someone’s skin pressed to mine. I’ve never almost come from a woman touching my cock.”

“You mean—” She stops talking as if she’s embarrassed to say the words.

“That’s exactly what I mean.”

“You can, you know. Do that.”

“Not until you do.” No way in hell do I come first.

“I don’t know if I can. I mean, I don’t know how.” Her cheeks turn that adorable shade of pink that I love so much.

“You can. I promise you that you can. My hands, my mouth, and my cock… they can all make you come.”

“I don’t know.”

I’m unsure if she’s saying she doesn’t know if I’m right or believes me. Either way, I have to reel myself in and think about unsexy things to keep myself in check. “Do you want me to show you?” She’s quiet for a long time, and I’m ready to tell her it doesn’t have to be tonight when she answers me.

“Only if you show me you too.”

“You want me to come?”

“Yes.”

“After you.”

“Maddox—” she starts, and I know she’s second-guessing this.

I reach over and turn off the bedside lamp before pulling her back into my arms. “Tonight, we sleep like this.” I pull her closer, my hard cock pressing against her belly. “Baby steps.”

“I’m sorry.” She presses her forehead to my chest.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. You’ve given me a piece of you that no one else has, and I’ll cherish it.”

“But you’re… ready.”

“I’ll be fine. Right now, I want to hold my wife and enjoy her skin pressed to mine while we drift off to sleep.”

“This feels… nice,” she whispers.

“Yeah,” I agree. We’re quiet and her breathing starts to even out. “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” Her body relaxes into mine and her breathing is deep and even.

“Maddox?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad it was you. If I had to wake up married to someone, I’m glad it was you.”

I smile into the darkness of the room. “Only me, Brogan.”

“Only you,” she says softly, before drifting off to sleep.

I stay awake, holding her, running my fingers through her hair, talking my cock down, but I wouldn’t change it. We’re making strides toward our future. She’s taking pieces of me she doesn’t know are hers, but that’s okay. One day soon, I’ll be able to tell her how she has all of me, in all the ways that matter.