Whirlwind

25. Ryker

Chapter twenty-five

Ryker

It’s been a miserable two weeks since I dropped Finley off at her apartment. We’ve emailed to discuss the data and structure of the research paper since school is out for the summer, but she hasn’t agreed to meet with me privately to talk about us . She’s still saying she needs time.

Part of me—the professor—understands and respects her choice. But the rest of me, the part obsessed with Finley Buckley, doesn’t get it. I hate that all our interactions have been strictly professional. The only glimpses I get of the real, non-student Finley are in the group chat Joey created for our team (plus himself and Finley) named “TT Upgrade.”

Officially, we haven’t asked Joey and Finley to join the team permanently, but I know Ezra and Hawk would be on board—so would I. They both made valuable contributions and fit in perfectly with us. But the uncertainty of what Finley and I will decide about our future hangs over that decision—especially when it comes to her place on the team. It’s not that I wouldn’t want her to join—I do want her to join—but I can’t be sure she’d even want to.

No matter how I look at it, the limbo we’re stuck in weighs on me, keeping me in a constant state of frustration—a fact Hawk is quick to point out after I snap at him and Ezra over a simple question.

“Either quit your job, show up at her apartment doorstep with some grand romantic gesture, or stop pouting. I can’t take it anymore, Ryker. You’re being a grump—and frankly, it’s annoying.”

“I second that,” Ezra says from beside me.

I scowl at them, leaning back in my chair. We’re sitting at my kitchen table with our computers and paperwork in front of us, planning out our next chase while going over data.

“I told you both, she wants to take it slow. Take time to figure things out.”

Ezra pats my shoulder. “Hate to say it, boss, but this isn’t slow. You’re stuck at ‘Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.’”

“I thought you two were against us being together,” I argue.

“I never said anything about it,” Ezra replies. “I knew you were crushing on her, but you know I stay out of everyone’s personal lives if I can. And now that I’m in it, my opinion is that you do what makes you happy.”

“And I didn’t want you to be an idiot,” Hawk says. “But that twister has already touched down and done damage. Now, you get to pick up the pieces and rebuild. We also like Finley.”

I groan at my smirking friends. “You had to use that metaphor?”

“Sounds like something Joey would say,” Ezra adds giddily.

Hawk shrugs, his face even more of a sly grin now. “Guess he’s rubbing off on me.”

I attempt to not scrunch my nose. I’m glad that Hawk and Joey are seeing each other—or whatever it is they’re doing—but I’d rather not have the image of my best friend having sex in my brain. Ezra must agree because he gags playfully, though like me, he can’t really talk. While Ezra is a hard worker and turns in early to edit and do social media a lot of nights on the road, he has brought his fair share of women to his motel rooms. It’s one of the reasons I didn’t feel bad about him hearing Finley and I that night.

Hawk claps his hands. “Okay, let’s refocus. We’re not talking about me and Joey. ”

“Yeah, let’s talk about Ryker being a hormonal asshole instead.” Ezra snickers.

I flex my jaw. “I’m not trying to be an ass, I’m just frustrated.”

“Like I said,” Hawk says, “get off your ass, and go do something about it.”

“And do what, quit my job?”

“Yes,” Hawk and Ezra say at the same time.

“I told you both that Finley doesn’t want that.”

“Are you sure?” Hawk asks.

I stare at my two friends, my hands digging into my thighs under the table. “That’s what she said.”

“I think she’s only looking out for you by saying that. It’s the same thing that you’re doing for her. You don’t want her to have to scramble her life, either,” Hawk reasons.

“And she shouldn’t have to. I’m her professor. I’m the one who crossed the line. I should be the one to have the consequences, not her.”

Ezra jumps in. “Dude, you’re way too uptight about this. You both crossed the line, and she’s twenty-five. You’re not a groomer.”

“That doesn’t mean people won’t think that. We have a natural power imbalance because of our professional relationship,” I say, thinking of the HR policy I’ve recited for so long now.

Hawk groans. “Not this again.”

I cross my arms over my chest. This isn’t the first time we’ve talked about what happened between me and Finley. My team deserved to know the truth and what I wanted to do about it. While Hawk and Ezra don’t work for the school, they’ll be affected by my choice to quit because the school funded our chase. They insist they’ll back me up if I quit, that there will be other ways to fund our research and more opportunities to publish a paper, and I know they mean it. Even so, the main reason I haven’t pulled the trigger on quitting is because I don’t want to upset Finley .

Fuck, maybe I am overthinking.

I rub my eyes tiredly, feeling a headache coming on. “Let’s get back to work.”

“No—no way. You need to make a choice,” Hawk demands.

“I’m waiting for Finley to tell me what she wants.”

“I think you should do it. Show her you’re committed.”

“Then she’ll be upset. I told you—”

He cuts me off. “Make a choice you’re happy with, and then tell her what you decided. No matter her reaction, at least then you know how you can move forward, and you’ll be settled with what you decide because you did what’s right for you.”

“Hawk’s right,” Ezra says. “Look at it this way: If you quit, and your relationship with Finley doesn’t work out, will you still be happy to move on?”

“Yes,” I say without hesitation. I can honestly say I would be.

Finley wanted space to slow things down and think things through, so I’ve respected that. For the past two weeks, my thoughts have been consumed by her and my job. If I want to be with her, the best option is to resign. She won’t be my student anymore, and we can be together. I can still mentor her alongside my team. Teaching has always been important to me, but it’s only one piece of my life.

Weather is my life. Storm chasing is my life. And after the success of our rocket launch, our research is on the cusp of something transformative. Storm chasing isn’t just my passion—it’s the work I’m most excited about. It’s work that will take me on more chases with my team—and hopefully with Finley. The thought brings a genuine smile to my face for the first time in days.

“I think you have your answer then,” Hawk says.

“And if Finley becomes a permanent fixture in my life, are you really both okay with it? Not to mention the loss of funding and potentially our research.”

“We’ve gone over this,” Hawk says. “The funding is replaceable. And I don’t think the school is going to throw away the research from this weekend regardless of what you choose. Everything can be worked out, Ryker.”

“No matter what happens, that’s all secondary to your life,” Ezra says, leaning forward to squeeze my shoulder. “We like Finley, and we want you to be happy. And we’ve already told you we would like her on the team. Joey, too.”

That makes Hawk smile. “Don’t forget that we have your back. We always have. Even when you’re being an insufferable asshole.”

My cheek twitches, and I exhale a breath, my shoulders easing after so many days of tension. “I don’t deserve friends like you.”

“Whatever, man. Would you do the same for us?” Ezra asks.

“You know I would.”

“Then that’s that.”

I sigh. “I really am sorry for all the bullshit I’ve caused—and for being a dick.”

Hawk and Ezra look at each other and nod before looking back at me. “We accept your apology,” Hawk says.

Ezra rubs his hands together. “Now, less talk, more action. The sooner you quit and talk to Finley, the sooner we can make the TT Upgrade Chat official and plan our next chase together.”

My smile mirrors his as I open up my email. “I’ll email HR now.”

“That’s my boy!” Ezra cheers. “Or should I say Tornado Daddy ?”

I groan and throw a pen from the table at his chest.

Fuck, I love my friends.