Chapter 11
11
XANDER
I would not touch myself to the memory of what happened last night. But I was already gripping my cock. I let my head fall back as I gave into the fantasy of the feel of her pussy around my fingers, her moans and cries for more.
In seconds, I was spurting all over the tiles. I braced a hand on the wall and let my head hang between my shoulders. I was spent, both mentally and physically.
Tori's request for a physical relationship had twisted me up inside. Of course I wanted that. My still-hard dick was proof. But I wanted so much more. The thing was, this might be all I'd ever get from her. I had to take what I could get.
How was I going to make it through this friends-with-benefits arrangement? She'd said she wanted me physically. She didn't say anything about emotionally. She'd also said it would help our fake relationship.
That's because I wasn't feeling anything fake about her. Last night was as real as it could get for me. I didn't have the benefit of alcohol to deaden my senses. I remembered everything in vivid detail. I could have refused to take our relationship to another level and kept the memory of last night alive forever. But it wasn't enough. I couldn't resist her sweet request for more.
She wanted to return the favor, and even though I said she didn't have to, I wanted that more than anything. Just the thought of her on her knees, my cock stretching her lips, had me throbbing again.
I wanted Tori, and there was nothing I could do to ignore it. Maybe fooling around would kill this urge I had for her. I'd get her out of my system and could think clearly again. I was looking forward to that. Right now, I felt all mixed up inside, like I could burst open at any second.
I was supposed to be doing things that made me look more responsible. Somehow, sleeping with my best friend didn't seem like a step in the right direction. This fake relationship thing was already going off the rails. But it was too late to stop this runaway skier.
Tori had offered me herself on a silver platter, and I'd be a fool to turn her away. I'd seen the vulnerability in her eyes when she'd asked for more. If I'd said no, she would have been hurt. I couldn't forget that she'd just come out of a rough relationship.
I wouldn't do anything to tear her down. I wanted to build her up. If a hot fling with her friend was the cure for her relationship troubles, then I'd be the one to deliver that for her. I was justifying this situation in my head a thousand different ways. But the truth was that I wanted her, and she was giving herself to me.
I quickly finished my shower and got ready for work. I couldn't afford to be late or distracted with thoughts of my new roommate. Not when I had a job to save and a future to create. My brothers didn't believe in me, and I had to do everything in my power to change that.
When I came out of the shower, Tori was in her bedroom with the door shut. I didn't bother knocking or saying where I was going. We were only roommates. Our fake relationship didn't need constant tending. Even if I was thinking about kissing her. It was occupying my every thought.
I hadn't tasted her last night. I wanted another chance to make her feel even better, to make her body soar.
In the truck, I threw on a podcast on the way to the lodge. If Eli and Oliver wanted me to understand business, then I'd teach myself. So far, I hadn't had any groundbreaking ideas on what we could do to improve the resort beyond what Eli had already done with adding the cabins.
I needed to contact a realtor because that apartment was getting smaller by the day. Moving in together had only made my attraction grow stronger. I wished I could be the guy for Tori. But she was destined for bigger and greater things.
Would she be attracted to one of the doctors touring her father's practice this week? I didn't even want to think about that. I'd always come up short when I compared myself to a doctor.
As I parked in the lot of the resort, the familiar pride crept in. My family's legacy was important to me. I cared if we stayed open or not. I wanted my parents to be proud of me too. I had to find a way to contribute meaningfully .
I walked around back, then to the locker-room area where I always kept my snow gear. I was here every day, so I had a permanent locker. I got on my gear.
At this point, skis felt like an extension of my body; I spent so much time on them. I had lessons starting at ten, but I wanted to take one run down the mountain first. I liked to ensure the lift was running smoothly and that the powder was just right. It had the added benefit of clearing my mind. I just wasn't sure that was possible today.
I took the lift to a black diamond. Instead of tacking, I tucked my knees and flew down the mountain. Satisfied that everything was ready for the day, I made my way to the lesson area. It was near the bunny hill where kids were already converging.
I skied over to say hello.
There was a family of three kids holding the rope to ascend the small hill. When they got to the top, they lined up, but the smaller one seemed reluctant to go down. I grabbed the rope to join them. When I approached, the older sister had a hand on her hip. "Come on, Ezra. It's not a big deal. It's a baby hill."
"I'm not a baby!" he cried.
I stopped in front of them. "Morning, guys. What's going on?"
The girl threw a hand in the direction of her little brother. "Ezra doesn't want to go down the hill. But Mom and Dad won't let us go on the mountain unless we go down this one first. He always ruins everything."
Ezra looked like he was on the verge of crying. That was a lot of pressure for a kid, and he was clearly scared.
"What's your name?" I asked the little girl.
"Sophia."
"Well, Sophia, why don't you show us how it's done." With a grin, she pushed off, easily traversing the small hill. Her parents grinned when she came to a stop in front of them.
I crouched to Ezra's level. "What's going on, little man?"
"I don't want to fall."
I nodded. "That's a valid concern. I fell a lot when I was first learning to ski."
"You did?" Ezra asked, his voice filled with awe. His middle brother moved closer, his hands tight on his poles.
I nodded. "Of course. But I didn't want to let my older brothers have all the fun."
Ezra seemed to consider that for a moment.
I pointed to the logo on my jacket. "I'm the ski instructor here, and I can help you if you want."
Ezra blinked as he read my name. "Your name is Wilde as in Wilde Ski Resort?"
"The one and only Xander Wilde. I'm one of the youngest brothers though, so I know how you feel."
"Your family owns this place?" Ezra asked, looking around as if taking it in for the first time.
I nodded. "That's right."
"Wow."
"Now are you ready for a quick lesson?" I asked him as I rose.
His gaze followed mine. "Okay."
"So what you're going to do is make sure you're balanced on your skis." I bent my knees and showed him how I maintained my balance even though it was second nature to me now. "Then we're going to play a little game."
Both boys watched me intently.
"It's called Simon Says. You do what I say." Kids loved games, and this was an easy one for them to follow. They didn't even have to think about it. They usually moved on auto pilot, and before they knew it, they were on the bottom of the hill.
When Ezra and his brother nodded, I took off. "Simon says follow me."
The boys pushed off one by one, easily mimicking my slow wide arcs down the slope. We made three wide turns before we were on the bottom.
"You did it!" Sophia cried as she joined us.
Pride surged through me. This is what I loved about my job. I held my gloved hand out to the parents. "I'm Xander Wilde, head of outdoor adventures here at the resort. I'm starting a beginner's lesson over there in a few minutes if you'd like your kids to join."
"Can we sign up all three kids?" the dad asked me.
"Of course." I took their information and added them to the course on my phone. The father paid for the lesson, signing the kids up for a week's worth while they were staying at the resort. Then I escorted the three kids over to the crowd that was forming for lessons. I easily wrangled everyone into a line and gave them the instructions for safety.
Some parents stayed, and others drifted off when they realized I had things under control. I didn't have any issues with kids. They were usually eager to learn. Some were scared, but I usually easily won them over.
By the end of the lesson, Ezra was skiing with more confidence, and I felt good about telling his parents he was ready for a green slope.
When he looked up at me, he asked, "Can you come with me?"
I glanced at the lesson schedule. "I have fifteen minutes before my next lesson starts. We'd better hurry."
The break between lessons was intended to give me time to run to the bathroom or grab water, but I routinely used it to follow my students up the mountain and back down again. I loved seeing the joy on their faces when they made it to the bottom.
I stayed with Ezra all the way down the mountain. When we got to the bottom, I crouched next to him. "How did that feel?"
He threw his arms around my neck. "Amazing!"
I patted his back before letting him go. "I'm so proud of you. I'll see you tomorrow in class, okay?"
The boy nodded, then skied toward his siblings, probably to ask if they'd seen it too.
The father approached me. "We weren't sure he'd make it down a hill at all. If that had happened, we'd have to split up so one of us could be with Ezra in the lodge. Thank you for saving our vacation."
"I don't know about that, but I'm happy to help. I hope you enjoy the rest of your stay, and I'll see your kiddos in lessons tomorrow." There was nothing better than helping people enjoy the outdoors.
The rest of the day flew by, and when I got a notification to come to Eli's office, I took off my gear and grabbed a sandwich and a water before heading toward his office. His was the biggest with a view of the mountains. I didn't use mine because I liked to say my office was the mountain. But I wasn't sure my brothers would appreciate that joke anymore.
I knocked lightly on Eli's door before heading inside. "I hope you don't mind if I eat. I missed lunch."
Eli's forehead creased. "You haven't eaten lunch?"
I glanced at the clock. It was six, and Tori would be here at seven. "Didn't have time between lessons."
"I thought we scheduled them so you can take a break between."
"Usually someone asks me to escort them on a green," I said, unwrapping my ham-and-cheese sandwich.
"And you do?" Eli asked.
"Of course. I want them to feel confident." I took a bite.
"You know they're only paying for a beginner's lesson, right?"
I raised a brow. "DIdn't Dad teach us to go the extra mile for our guests?"
"You're right. He did." Eli smiled slowly, then turned his attention to something on his computer screen. "Oliver said you get a lot of add-ons to the lessons. Do you know why that is?"
"I go to the bunny hill and talk to whoever's there. I can usually rustle up another family or two who didn't want to navigate the online scheduling system or wasn't sure what lessons entailed."
"This is happening almost every day, for every lesson. And they're signing up for a full week, if not more."
I swallowed, then drank my water. "That's good, right?"
"We're just looking closely at the lessons for the first time. We've always trusted you to handle that area."
I set my sandwich down, my appetite fading. "You don't trust me to handle lessons anymore?"
Eli frowned. "That's not what I'm saying. We wanted to take a look at how things are going, and we were surprised at a few things we're seeing."
"You don't want me to talk to the guests or continue lessons on the mountain?"
"No. It's not that. In fact, it seems to be effective. You have more sign-ups then our other instructors."
"I'm really good with people. I may not know my way around a spreadsheet like Oliver or manage conferences like you, but I know people. I know what they want, and I give it to them. If they sign up for extra lessons, that's nice. But I just want them to have a great stay. The parents who come want to have a good vacation, and that means that every kid needs to be confident on that mountain. Otherwise they're split between kids who can ski and who can't. Or they can't go skiing at all."
Eli's eyes widened. "No. That's great. I didn't mean to sound like I was criticizing your methods. They're obviously working."
I leaned forward. "What do you expect me to think when you're scrutinizing things all of a sudden. It certainly feels like you don't trust me."
"I manage the entire resort. I need to look at things closely at least once a year so I know what's going on and what we can improve on. From what you're telling me, not everyone uses the online service. I think Oliver would be surprised about that. We spent a lot of time on the resort app to make it easy as one click to sign up for lessons."
"It is easy. A lot of people have mentioned that to me. But some people need the extra nudge. I've never agreed with the limits on class size either. If the class is full, the app precludes anyone else from signing up. I can do far more people than what the system limits me too."
Eli nodded, his gaze still on the screen. "Your reviews are great too."
How many times could I say that I was good with the resort's guests before Eli believed me? "It's not always about apps and online systems. People want the personal touch."
"I see that with Marcus too. The diners adore him."
"Not everything can be defined by looking at numbers on a spreadsheet. You should come out and see me work."
Eli nodded. "I think I will."
"Good." I finished off my sandwich, my appetite returning.
"What are your plans for tonight?" Eli turned away from his screen.
"I'm taking Tori on a night run."
"That's happening, huh?" Eli asked.
"I hope so." I didn't want to mess anything up, but I couldn't help but be truthful. I did hope for more with Tori. I just wasn't sure I was brave enough to ask for it.
"You deserve the best, Xan."
I grinned, my usual charm returning. "Of course I do."
Eli's expression didn't waver. "I was serious. You're a nice guy. You deserve to get the girl."
I sobered. "I don't know that I deserve her. I wish I did."
"You don't think you deserve Tori?" Eli asked, his brow furrowed.
I chewed, swallowed, then said, "She dated a surgeon before me."
"She seems to like you. She always has. I don't think it matters what your profession is."
"I'm a soon-to-be out of work ski instructor. I can hardly compare with a surgeon. He saves lives." Literally. I just saved people's vacations, and even that was a bit of a stretch. I made things better. But that was it. I stood up and threw my wrapper into the trash. "Is that all you needed to talk about?"
"I think you're putting too much pressure on yourself. Tori likes you for you."
Sure, Tori liked me as a friend. But that was it. I'd never be a man she could see herself with. I was good for a quick release. "I haven't come up with any groundbreaking business ideas, but I'm listening to some business podcasts."
Eli leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest. "You are?"
"Yeah, I need to start thinking like you and Oliver if I want to have a place in the business."
Eli nodded. "I'm glad to hear it."
"See you later." I threw my empty water bottle in the recycling bin on the way out, almost running into Oliver.
Joey stood behind Oliver, and I loved my nephew more than anything. I grinned and lifted him into a bear hug. "How's my favorite guy?"
"I'm good. Daddy's letting me work tonight." Meaning Carolina probably had something going on because he was usually home with her when Oliver had to work.
"You want to come outside with me for a few minutes while your dad meets with Uncle Eli?"
"Can I, Daddy?" Joey asked Oliver, and he said, "Sure. I'll be down in a few minutes. Then we'll head home for dinner. Caro's making lasagna."
"Mmm. Yum," Joey said.
I wished I had someone waiting for me at home like that. For now, I had Tori, but I knew it wouldn't last. I was a pit stop for her.