Chapter 4
CHAPTER 4
Autumn could have taken a handful of trails on the property, but her feet had automatically sent her in this direction.
Clearly, she was a glutton for punishment.
Noah wandered over to the small sign sticking out of the ground. “Lover’s Bliss Waterfall.” Glancing back at her, his eyebrows shot up. “Who named this place?”
“What do you expect? We do live in Sweetheart, South Carolina.” Everything here had a kitschy name. “Not like it was a secret. We weren’t the only ones who enjoyed skinny dipping…and other activities here.”
The corners of his lips tipped up into a crooked smile. Mischief and heat glittered through those gorgeous blue eyes, the same color as the deep pool of water gurgling behind him.
“Don’t see anyone here now.”
“Trust me, security has their hands full here.”
Grabbing the tail of his belt, Noah began toeing off his shoes.
“What are you doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing?”
“Noah, it’s fifty-two degrees outside. That water is below freezing.”
The glitter in his eyes only went brighter. “I sit in tubs of water colder than this on a regular basis.”
Of course he did.
Autumn tried not to watch, but it was utterly impossible as a small pile of clothing built up along the bank of the pool. Socks, jeans, Henley.
His body was…illegal. Or it should have been. The bulky pads he wore to protect his body clearly hid way more than she’d ever realized. The man had an eight pack, for crying out loud. Every muscle along his arms, legs and torso was defined. Sunlight poured across his skin, highlighting the peaks and valleys.
At least he kept his boxer briefs on, not that they hid much. The man had been blessed in more ways than just his ability to throw a football.
Pausing at the edge, he threw a glance her way. “You’re not going to join me?”
“Not on your life.”
“Chicken.”
“Intelligent.”
With a shrug, Noah took a deep breath and plunged straight in. She watched his whole body react, air rushing from his lungs, chest constricting. Every muscle pulled tight.
But he didn’t bolt immediately out like she would have. Instead, he went further in, further down, until his entire body submerged beneath the eddying water.
It was something, to watch the man control his body and involuntary physical reaction to the cold. After several seconds his breathing regulated. His eyes closed and despite everything, he looked blissful and calm.
How was that possible? Autumn would have hollered in pain the minute her pinky toe hit the water.
She had no idea how long he stayed in there. Minutes that felt like an eternity. He stood, water streaming down his hard body, following the mountains and plains of his ripped physique. Was it bad that she wanted to lean forward and lick her tongue along the same path?
Completely unaware of her wayward thoughts, Noah shook shining droplets of moisture from his dark hair. “God, I needed that.”
Autumn’s mouth was dry as the desert, or else she would have said…something.
Using his shirt to dry the moisture from his body, Noah slipped back into his clothes. She tried very hard not to be disappointed, or pay attention to the way everything clung to his wet skin now.
Swallowing, she said, “I can find you some dry things at the resort.”
“Nah, I’m fine, but thanks.”
Sure. Yeah. Whatever. God, what was wrong with her? This man had broken her heart and all it had taken for her brain to melt and turn into mush was him stripping almost naked.
She was too damn old to let her libido rule her brain.
Or maybe she hadn’t let her libido overrule her brain enough lately and Noah just happened to be the first healthy male body she’d seen in a while.
Yep, that was it.
“Why don’t we walk back before you die of pneumonia. Harry would kill me.”
His lips twisted. “She’d kill us both.” Sweeping his hand out, Noah indicated she should lead the way back down the path.
Autumn blamed her still scrambled brain for what happened next. If she’d been on top of her game, it never would have. She’d walked this path a million times, knew it like the back of her hand, so that was the only explanation as to why she found herself tripping over a tree root jutting into the path.
One minute she was walking and the next…somehow she was tight in Noah’s arms.
Her entire world tipped sideways. Literally.
His arms were tight bands of steel, the only thing keeping her from smacking hard into the ground. Dampness from his wet shirt seeped into her skin, followed right behind by a heat she hadn’t felt in years. Fifteen to be exact.
Noah’s jaw tightened. Something dark and needy roiled through the depths of his blue eyes, turning them into a storming ocean.
Air labored through Autumn’s tight lungs, not from her near fall, but from the feel of him touching her.
His hold on her gentled. Morphed from savior to caress. His mouth was just centimeters away from her own. The soft brush of his breath teased across her open lips.
God, she wanted him to touch her. More. She wanted to taste him. To remember. To feel and just be alive with him in a way no other man had ever given her.
“Tell me to stop,” he murmured, giving her several heartbeats to make up her mind. She should say no, but the word simply wouldn’t form.
His mouth brushed hers, soft and seeking at first. It didn’t take long for the hunger they both remembered to rear up and take over.
Autumn opened for him, giving him permission, asking him to take. And he didn’t disappoint. His mouth and tongue were an assault on her senses. He teased and devoured, nibbled and demanded.
Somehow, she went from prone in his arms to her back pressed tight against a nearby tree. And still, she wanted more.
His hands roamed her body, testing and touching. The warmth of his fingers somehow found the soft curve of her hip and belly.
It wasn’t until she felt the sweep of his caress moving up the line of her inner thigh that reality hit with the same cold spray of the waterfall she could still hear gurgling in the background.
Palms flat to his chest, Autumn pushed him away.
Noah didn’t fight or cajole, he simply let her go, his hands staying on her hips only long enough to ensure she was steady before dropping away.
Neither of them said anything, they both simply watched. Autumn’s skin tingled and her mouth throbbed with the need for more. But she wasn’t about to give in – to him or herself.
After several seconds, Noah said, “I’d apologize for that, but I don’t regret it, so….”
All Autumn could do was shake her head.
Because neither did she. But that physical need couldn’t erase the past.
Her voice was husky, filled with need and memories. “You broke my heart once, Noah. There’s a snowball’s chance in hell I’m going to let you do it again.”
Hours later, Autumn’s words still spun through his brain. Her expression of utter devastation gutted him.
Sure, he’d known that leaving back then hurt her. It had hurt him, too. But he’d expected time to have healed the wound.
Clearly, it hadn’t.
Which bothered him and somehow made him restless…and hopeful.
The day he’d walked away from Sweetheart, he’d known he was leaving her behind. He’d needed out, a clean break, and he couldn’t ask her to come with him. Not when her entire life, her goals, dreams and family were wrapped up in Sweetheart. Her mom had just been diagnosed with cancer for God’s sake.
Noah wasn’t sure what he’d feared most, that she’d say no if he asked her to come, or that she’d say yes and resent him for the rest of their lives. It had been hard, but walking away had been the right thing. For both of them.
Or that’s what he’d told himself.
Right now, he wasn’t so sure. On either count.
There was a reason he’d never married. Hell, he’d never had another truly serious relationship. Sure, he’d dated, but with his life and schedule it was easy to spend months with someone and never really connect. To never share the important pieces of himself or ask for that in return.
He’d been having fun, clear up front with his partners on what he had to give. He’d told himself he didn’t miss having a confidant – a partner – to share everything with. Not like the bond he and Autumn had shared.
He had friends, an agent. Hell, he even had a part time assistant. It wasn’t the same and deep down he’d always known the truth. Nothing had come close to measuring up to what he’d shared with Autumn. The security, acceptance, not to mention the heat.
At the time he’d told himself there was no reason to dwell on the past. She’d made it absolutely clear once he walked away there was no going back.
And as much as the expression on her face today had killed him…that pulsing need he could feel inside her had also given him a glimmer of hope.
Maybe that door wasn’t as tightly sealed as she’d like it to be.
The question was, what was he going to do about it?
It took Autumn several minutes to realize the pounding wasn’t just the wine she’d drank last night fighting back.
Bleary-eyed, she kicked off the covers, snatched a bottle of water out of the fridge on her way by and downed half of it as she plodded for the front door.
What time was it? And who the heck was trying to break through her front door at this ungodly hour?
Flipping the locks, she didn’t pause as she jerked the door open and growled, “What?”
The last person she expected to find standing on her front porch was Noah.
He didn’t say a single word. Instead, his bright gaze traveled from the top of her head to the tip of her toes. God, she must look like death warmed over. An entire bottle of wine followed by tossing and turning all night were not a good beauty regimen.
Autumn had to force herself not to reach for her hair and smooth down any knots. Noah showed up at her door unannounced, he got whatever he deserved.
The corners of his lips twitched, but at least the man was smart enough not to let the smile actually form. “Good night?”
“The best,” Autumn quipped. She didn’t bother closing the front door, but spun away and headed back to the kitchen. He’d either follow and tell her what he wanted or leave.
Right now, Autumn didn’t care which.
Opening a cabinet, she pulled down a bottle of aspirin, shook two into her palm and downed them with the rest of the water.
He was smart enough not to comment.
Leaning back against the counter, Autumn finally asked, “What are you doing here? And how did you find me?”
Mirroring her stance, Noah leaned against the island across from her. The two feet between them wasn’t nearly enough because despite her best efforts, her body started responding. Remembering the feel of his hands and mouth on her yesterday.
“It wasn’t hard. Harry told me you’d moved into a house several doors down from your parents’ old place.”
She’d done that a few years after her mom passed. By then, she’d needed her own space and it just made things easier for her and her dad to be close. Not to mention the neighborhood was comfortable and safe. She’d grown up on the street and knew just about everyone.
“That’s still pretty broad.” There were at least thirty houses.
He shrugged, not really answering her silent question. Surely, he hadn’t knocked on every door until he’d found the right one. God, the neighborhood text chain was probably going bananas if he had.
Sweetheart was amazing for a lot of things, but the speed of gossip wasn’t one of them. Everyone in town knew Noah Woodson. If he’d gone door-to-door asking for her…
Autumn closed her eyes and sighed. “What can I do for you, Noah?” she asked, without opening them again.
“What are you doing today?”
Slowly, she opened her eyes, one at a time. Surely, she’d heard wrong? Because it sounded like Noah was low-key asking her out.
“Excuse me?”
That teasing smile played around his lips again, sending a wave of heat spinning through her belly. “You heard me. What are you doing today?”
It was Sunday, one of the few days she normally had off. She’d honestly been so off-kilter last night that she hadn’t even thought about what she was going to do today. Which was unusual. Normally, she spent Sunday catching up on all the things she ignored during the week. Errands, grocery shopping, cooking a few meals so she’d have things waiting and ready at the end of a long day.
But somehow, admitting to Noah Woodson that she had nothing more exciting than laundry planned didn’t feel right. Shrugging, she said, “I have a few things planned today. Why?”
His eyes sparkled, somehow conveying that he knew exactly what she wasn’t saying. “There’s a holiday festival in the square. I was hoping you might want to join me.”
Autumn blinked, once, twice, a third time for good measure.
“Before you say no…”
Because clearly that’s exactly what she was going to say. Saying yes would be…self-destructive.
“I just want to spend some time with you. Catch up.”
Shaking her head, Autumn asked, “Why does it matter, Noah?”
Shifting his body away from the counter and into the space between them, he said, “Because I’m realizing I made a terrible mistake.”
“You’re just saying that because I’m here and your life is falling apart. I’m easy and comfortable and in front of you at the perfect time.”
“No.” The single word was emphatic. “That’s not true. Yes, seeing you was the catalyst to forcing me to face the truth about fifteen years ago, but that has nothing to do with what’s happening in my career.”
Autumn rolled her eyes. “Please. If you weren’t reeling from the blow of being released, you wouldn’t be standing in my kitchen right now. You’d be worried about recovering from your injury as fast as possible so you could get back to your team and that field. You thrive on the camaraderie and competition of the game, Noah. There’s nothing wrong or shameful in admitting it.”
The affability on his face disappeared, replaced by glittering anger and tight lips. “You’re not wrong. I love those aspects of the game. I’m lucky, I’ve found fulfillment and success doing something I love. But I’ve also had a hole in my life that no matter what, I couldn’t seem to fill.”
The implication that her and their relationship was that hole?
“Noah, you chose your career over us.” Those words were the bald truth. “And I don’t begrudge you that decision. You did what you needed to for you and I’m very happy that it worked out well. But…you didn’t feel like you needed me in your life then, and I don’t believe for a minute that you’ve suddenly decided that was the wrong decision. You’ve had fifteen years to come to that conclusion.”
Pure frustration tightened every muscle in Noah’s body. A single hand jerked through his hair as a growl erupted through his parted lips. “For argument’s sake, let’s assume what you’re saying is true. Fine, circumstances have put us here in this spot at this moment. The life I had is over. Period. It hurts a little, but I’m honestly okay with it. I’ve had months to come to terms with the reality, Autumn. This wasn’t something that blindsided me yesterday. I knew it was coming.”
She wasn’t sure that made it any better. In fact, she thought that was probably worse. To continue fighting, day after day, to recover from an injury that in your heart you knew was going to take away the career you’d worked so hard to build.
“Doesn’t mean the final blow didn’t hurt.”
“Of course, it hurt. But that doesn’t negate the fact that seeing you, touching you, kissing you…” Noah took a step closer. His hand bridged the space between them, settling lightly against the curve of her hip.
She should move. But she didn’t.
Silence hung in the air between them, heavy with the words he wasn’t saying. Until he murmured “Letting you go yesterday hurt more, Autumn. That phone call should have been the worst moment of my day, but it wasn’t.”
Noah stared deep into her eyes. Emotions swirled inside, hope, pain, heat. But most of all, earnest truth.
Her own chest tightened. Her mouth opened, but closed without any words flowing out. She wasn’t sure what to say. Her brain was screaming at her to push him away. To protect herself from the inevitable pain that was going to come.
But her heart…it wanted to rejoice and revel in that hope with him. To embrace the possibility of what she’d always wanted – a second chance.
Dropping his forehead to hers, Noah whispered, “Please, just give me a chance. That’s all I’m asking for, Autumn. Spend the day with me.”
She closed her eyes. Her stomach slowly spun, but somehow she found herself saying, “Okay.”