24. Aurora
24
AURORA
PLAYING DIRTY
J ack gently squeezed my arms as he shrugged. “ I know a guy.”
I smoothed my hand over the lacquered surface. It was tilted up, inclined so I could use it without craning my neck down, but I could flatten it or raise and lower it. The hand-etched mural was breathtaking. The Northern Lights rushed across the top of the desk in a gorgeous display. There was just enough color staining the dark wood to tie it to the walls. Deep greens and moody purples melted together.
That’s when I noticed how it had been done. “ It’s not painted . . . It’s? —”
“Burned,” Jack said. “ Like the Aurora Archer brand on the floor. I thought it’d be a cool thing to match.” He tipped the edge up, revealing the underside of the desk. A large crest was burned into the back. But instead of the Aurora Archer A ’s , there were two interlocking W ’s .
“It’s been fun finding your Aunt’s clues, but I think it’s time you left your own mark on this place.”
I spun away from the desk, threw my arms around him, and squeezed. “ Jack . . . It’s perfect. But . . .” I sighed. “ I can’t take it with me. Maybe I could have it shipped or something?”
But Jack wasn’t perplexed. He dug his fingers into my hair and cradled my head against his chest. “ It’s here as long as you are, Roar .”
“Thank you,” I whispered into his chest. “ This is more than anyone has ever done for me.”
“That’s a damn shame.”
I stole another peek at the bed. “ I can’t wait to sleep on it.”
Jack tightened his arms around me once more, then let go. I missed it immediately. “ Go try it out.”
I took a few respectable steps before throwing caution to the wind and leaping onto the mattress.
Jack’s laugh was rich and loud as I bounced.
“Oh my God . ” I flopped onto my back and spread out like a starfish. “ This is amazing.” I hugged the pillow and closed my eyes. “ My back has been killing me on that air mattress, and—” I froze as dark notes of cinnamon and black pepper mulled together in a rich musk. The pillowcase smelled like him.
Memories of falling asleep in his bed, wrapped in his arms started to float through my memory, riding on clouds of his cologne. The way his muscles would flex and tighten whenever I shifted because he was pulling me closer.
I had never been held the way that Jack held me.
“Is this your pillow?” I murmured as I pressed my nose to the cover.
“The pillow case is,” he said as he sat on the edge of the bed. “ The pillow’s yours. I don’t know your pillow preferences yet. Are you a well-worn, tried and true pillow girl, or do you like the big, fluffy ones?”
I laughed. “ It’s a mama bear, papa bear, baby bear situation. The trick is to have one new, fluffy pillow on the bottom for volume, and an old, thin pillow on top for support.” I cracked open an eye and peered at him. “ Is that high-maintenance of me?”
A gruff rumble echoed from his chest. “ I think that makes you a pillow princess.”
I groaned. “ Yeah . It definitely makes me sound high-maintenance."
Jack grinned. “ Nothing wrong with that, Roar .”
I rolled onto my side, propped my elbow up, and rested my chin in my hand. “ Why’d you do this, Jack ?”
Instead of mimicking my position, Jack stretched out on his back. “ Because I like you. I care about you. I want good things for you. I want to be the one to give you those good things.”
The slow, steady rise and fall of his chest was hypnotic. It was calm, like the ocean waves that crashed in a steady rhythm. My heart ached at the sincerity in his voice.
He said it so simply. So naturally. So truthfully.
I always looked for ulterior motives, but with Jack , there were none.
“You’re making this so hard,” I admitted as I lay down beside him.
“What do you mean?”
I sighed. “ I was hoping that I’d leave to go see Whit , and everything would cool off between us when I got back.”
“This isn’t about sex, Roar . I’m not trying to get in your pants.”
“I know. And I think that’s what makes it worse,” I admitted. “ If you were just trying to seduce me, it’d be easier to stay away.”
“Tell me why you want to stay away. Because I promise you, I know what I want. I know I can handle it. So , tell me, what’s your reason?”
I lifted my eyes and met his as he peered down at me. “ Because it will come to an end and it will hurt.” I swallowed. “ I lived with my ex for years before our relationship ended. But just the thought of leaving you hurts worse than the reality of that breakup. The figment of you is more real than every other fantasy I’ve ever had. Because you’re not an idea. You’re you, and you’re irresistible.”
“If you know it’s going to end, then why not enjoy it in the meantime?”
“I know what you’re getting at,” I said as I traced a thick vein that ran from his hand to his forearm. “ You think if you convince me to let you have a shot in the temporary, you’ll get me to stay long-term." I met his eyes and felt myself being sucked into his orbit. It was working. “ We don’t even know each other,” I said in an attempt to hold on to my final bastion of denial.
"Yeah, we do, Roar . I’ll respect your no, but saying we don’t know each other is a fucking lie. And I won’t stand for that.” He reached out and tenderly tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. “ I know you’re ready to get back into writing, but you’re scared so you’re pretending like you haven’t been working night and day on a passion project. You’re doing that because there’s no expectation for you to produce anything if you keep pretending like it’s not something. I know you’re more alive now than when you arrived. I know that you feel more of a connection to your mom because of what you’ve learned about your aunt. I know you crave adventure and possibilities. I see it in you every time we find something your aunt hid in the house. You say you’re a homebody, but you’re not. You’re closed off to forming relationships with people because you need them to prove that they want to be around you. So I’ll keep proving it to you, Roar . You don’t want sex? That’s fine. I can go without sex. It’s not the end of the world. But I can’t go without you. So I’m going to be here every day, proving just how much I want you.”
“Those are reckless words,” I whispered as my eyes lowered to the mouth that had formed each syllable.
“Just because something scares you doesn’t make it reckless.” His lips grazed mine. “ You scare the hell out of me, but it doesn’t stop me from wanting you.”
It was my turn to be reckless. I kissed Jack with a hand on either side of his face. There was no hesitancy. No skittishness.
“You’ve gotta lead this dance, Roar ,” he rasped. “ You’ve already told me no, so I’m not going to twist that into a yes without knowing you’re in this of your own free will.”
“Why are you such a good guy?” I whispered as I tangled my fingers in the short length of his hair. “ Why couldn’t you have been a dick?”
He chuckled, a warm, rich sound that reminded me of holiday fireplace crackles. “ I can be whatever you need me to be, sweetheart.”
“I don’t think you could be a dick if you tried.”
He shook his head. “ Be reckless near the ocean and I’ll be a dick.” He caressed my cheek and rested his forehead on mine. “ But it’s only because I don’t want anything to ever happen to you.”
There were so many unsaid feelings in those few words. So much to unpack. But I knew exactly what he meant without even peeling back the first layer.
I reached for his shirt and started to work it over his head. I had no idea why he was wearing a shirt. Most of the time, he came over without one on. I had seen him in nothing but shorts more times than I had seen him in a proper outfit.
“Aurora, stop.”
I froze with the hem of his shirt around his ribs. My eyes met his in surprise. I thought . . . I thought he wanted this. Wanted me.
Heat and hurt flashed across the back of my neck. Embarrassment snaked around my throat like a vine. It felt like I was being dragged by the undertow and force-fed a metric ton of sand.
“This can wait,” he said as he took my hand in his and laced our fingers together. “ I work tomorrow. We can let it cool off. Talk about it the day after tomorrow when I get home. Make sure this is really what you want.”
“What if I don’t want it to cool off? What if I want to be right and reckless?”
“I’m not going to stop you, but I’m trying to do right by you.” I could see the pain in his eyes. The resistance. “ I’m trying to be a good guy, Roar .”
I stripped his shirt up and over his head. “ Well , stop it.”
In the blink of an eye, I was stretched out and pinned beneath him. “ Say it, Roar . Tell me exactly what you want.”
“I want you to fuck me,” I said as I clawed at the elastic waistband of his athletic shorts. “ In this bed that you built for me.” A devilish thought floated through my mind. “ Or I’ll find someone else who will.”
It was cruel to tease him like that, but it was effective.
Jack grabbed the sides of my shorts and yanked them off my hips. “ Stay .”
“I can’t,” I said as I worked at his boxer briefs. “ But you have me as long as I’m here.”
“That’s good enough,” he said as he slid flat hands up my stomach and curled his fingers around my bra. “ For now .”
Cool air danced across my bare skin as he pulled my shirt and bra over my head. Goosebumps pebbled across my body, but Jack was quick to smooth them away.
“You’re so fucking perfect,” he said as he cupped a hand under my knee and drew it up to hook around his hip. The heavy length of his cock pressed against my pussy, teasing my clit with each slow rock.
I wanted to cave into him. To dissolve and become one. He was a tidal wave, crashing and carrying me. Destructive to my defenses and overwhelming to my senses. He consumed me with every touch. Every word. Every filthy, wanton whisper. He pursued me like a riptide and decimated me like a landslide. There was an inhuman power that was unassailable.
“Hold on to me, Roar . Arms around me.”
I clung to him through each kiss. Through each teasing touch. Through every caress and whispered breath.
Jack eased me onto the pillows before peppering my breasts with soft sucks and gentle kisses.
“Did you spray the bedding with your cologne?” I asked as he teased my nipple.
“Yes,” he said while he switched to the other breast. “ I told you. I play dirty. I’m not opposed to pulling out all the stops.”
I bit down on my lip and whimpered as he cupped and squeezed my tit and lapped at the pointed bud. I tried to squeeze my legs together to ease the roiling desperation, but Jack’s body between my thighs made it impossible.
“What do you need, Roar ?”
I took his hand in mine and moved it between my legs, making him cup my sex. “ I ache for you.”
A cocky smile played across his mouth as he teased my clit with feather-light fingers. “ Does that make it feel better, baby girl?”
I shook my head as the desperation made me grow delirious. “ More ,” I whimpered.
But he didn’t give it to me. He traced my clit. Teased the entrance of my cunt. He palmed my ass and whispered his fingers between my cheeks.
“Jack!” I cried in frustration. “ Please !”
“Patience,” he murmured against the corner of my mouth. “ I’ve had to wait so long to have you again. I’m going to take my time enjoying every piece of you.” He fisted the back of my hair and yanked my head to the side. His mouth danced across my ear. “ And when I slide my bare cock into your wet little pussy, I’m going to go slower than you could ever imagine so I can memorize every microscopic piece of you. And when I come, I’m going to write my name across the walls of your cunt so that every time you feel that ache, you’ll remember who you ache for and who can satisfy it.”
His words, erotically wholesome as they were, only made the craving for him that much more insatiable.
“I need you,” I begged as I rested my forehead against his shoulder. “ Now .”
He notched the head of his cock into my entrance and pushed in ever so slightly.
“More,” I demanded.
His answering chuckle was dark and devious. “ Baby , I just told you that I’m taking my time. Don’t be surprised when I’m a man of my word.”
“Jack!”
Another half-inch wasn’t anywhere close to enough.
“I can feel your greedy little pussy trying to squeeze around me. Patience . I’m enjoying myself.”
I tried to snap my hips to drive him in deeper, but Jack was faster. He pinned my hips down with an amused chuckle. “ Try that again, and my hand will turn your ass bright red.” He slid in a little farther.
“But I? —”
“I know, I know. You need my cock.” His lips found mine in the sweetest kiss. “ But you’re not the shot caller here, Roar . Trust me to give you what you need.”
“Why do you call me that?” I asked as I rocked my hips against his. “ Why not Aurora or Wander like everyone else?”
“I like calling you Roar ,” he said, then punctuated it with his lips on mine and his tongue slowly sliding through my mouth. “ Because you’re a battle cry in the last siege. Things are bleak, but you’re the unstoppable force of good that will win against all odds. I believe in you. And it’s about fucking time you remembered who you are.”
And with that, he slid inside of me, bottoming out as he buried his shaft deep. The force of the thrust knocked the air out of my lungs. I clung to him, fingers digging into his skin and leaving marks as I rocked with him.
“There you go, beautiful.” The bed creaked and shook as he fucked me. “ Trust me. Hold on to me. Let me give you what you need.”
We were fused as one as he filled me with pleasure and washed away my fears.
At this moment, at least for the time being, we were limitless.
The scrape and pressure of his pelvis against my clit pushed me closer and closer to the point of no return. My desperate cries and wanton whimpers quieted as I edged close and closer. My skin was electric—each nerve and synapses preparing to fire.
“Jack.” His name was the last sound I croaked before my world turned inside out. I gasped as my body went white hot like a lightning strike. I seized around him and he held on to me, both of us riding out the orgasm together.
Jack’s grunt was primal and intrinsic as he came inside of me. We collapsed on the bed, gasping for air. He smoothed the sweat-soaked strands of hair out of my face and pressed a kiss to my temple.
“You did so well for me, baby,” he soothed. “ You all right?”
I nodded, then tucked my head against his shoulder and closed my eyes.
Jack held me close, easing the crash from the high. He peppered my face with kisses and whispered sweet nothings as his cock slowly softened inside of me.
“This is just the beginning, Roar ,” Jack said as he cradled me in his arms and carried me to the bathroom to clean up.
That time, goosebumps of pride tickled my neck at hearing him call me “ Roar .”