8. Eli
CHAPTER 8
ELI
“ R ed or white?”
“Oh, whatever you’re having is fine,” Maddie said quickly. “I don’t want you to feel like you need to open two bottles.”
“No, I won’t,” Eli said. “But you’re my guest, and I’d like to give you whatever you’d enjoy most here.”
“Red, then.”
Eli nodded and uncorked the bottle. He pulled down a pair of glasses and poured a measure of wine into each of them, and then he handed one to Maddie.
She took a sip. “This is really good,” she said.
“I’m glad you like it.” It was one of his nicer bottles, and a part of Eli’s mind was aware of the fact that it was strange — unusual — for him to be opening such a nice bottle for somebody else. It was the kind of thing he would usually have saved for a holiday, or a special occasion when he’d have had the chance to show it off to a lot of guests. To open this bottle on a whim because he had decided to have a drink with his nanny — well, there was so much about that that was unprecedented, he didn’t quite know where to begin to address it.
“Do you know a lot about wine?” he asked her. Maybe he had sensed a fellow enthusiast.
She laughed. “I know nothing about wine. My roommate Tess and I have been drinking box wine since college.”
“Well, it’s definitely going to be better than that,” he agreed. Internally, he was forced to shake his head at himself. She wasn’t interested in wine — at least not in the terms he’d been thinking of it. She didn’t have fancy tastes. He could have given her anything at all and she would have appreciated it.
And yet, he found that he didn’t regret his decision to offer up the good stuff. He was glad he had opened one of his nice bottles for Maddie.
At some point, he was going to have to explore why he was feeling that way. But not right now.
“Do you want anything else?” he asked her. “Something to eat? I could cut up a couple of cheese pairings.” As long as he was going all out, he might as well do it right.
“You don’t have to do all that,” she said.
“I do have some cheeses that go well with this,” he said. “And it wouldn’t be any trouble. You’ve been working out, and I don’t want you to be hungry, especially late at night.”
“It’s nice of you to take the trouble,” Maddie said. “It really isn’t necessary, though. I don’t tend to feel that hungry after I’ve been dancing.”
“All right,” he agreed. “Just let me know if you change your mind.”
“Will do.”
He sipped his wine, trying not to stare at her. Even the way she held the glass was alluring — delicately, between her fingertips, as if she was holding the stem of a flower. He wanted to watch every move she made. He knew that he couldn’t, though. He had to do what he could to keep the distance between the two of them. She wasn’t on the clock now, but she was still his employee, and there was no getting around that fact. He had to make sure to treat her professionally at all times. And that was more important now than ever, with the two of them sitting here with an open bottle of wine. They were courting disaster, if they weren’t careful.
Not that anything would happen between them. Eli might be feeling things he shouldn’t, but there was no reason to allow himself to believe that Maddie was. She was probably in her right mind, even if he wasn’t.
“Is Charlie still asleep?” she asked.
“Yeah, I looked in on him when I got out of the shower. Out like a light.” Eli was grateful for the change of subject. At least Charlie was something they could talk about without things feeling weird between them. What was more, they should be talking about Charlie. That actually was keeping things professional.
Maddie smiled. “He’s such a cool kid,” she said. “You’ve done an amazing job with him. I hope you know that.”
“He is pretty great,” Eli agreed.
But he wasn’t sure how much credit he could actually take for the way his son had turned out. He was proud of Charlie, of course — but he also knew he hadn’t done as much of the work of raising him as he should have. He hadn’t been around for that much of Charlie’s growing up so far. The hands-on stuff had been left mostly to nannies, and every time Eli felt pride in his son, he had to wrestle with a competing feeling of shame over the fact that he couldn’t take responsibility for how great Charlie was turning out.
That wasn’t something he needed to unpack with Maddie, though, even if it did make him feel slightly guilty to receive her praise. “I’ve been so happy with everything he’s done so far,” he said instead. “He’s incredibly smart.”
“I can tell. He’s a great reader. I feel like that’s always the best way to tell with a kid his age — not even how much skill they have at reading, but how much enthusiasm they have for it. I’ve seen him sit with a book for a solid hour. The first time I saw it, I thought he might be looking at the pictures.”
“Oh, no, he reads them,” Eli said. “He’s really into that series about the dragons.”
“I’ve noticed that! You know, kids who like that series usually like the Magic in the Woods series. Have you heard of it?”
“I haven’t.”
“It’s age appropriate. Would you mind if I picked up the first one for him to see if he’s interested? Or do you like to read books yourself before giving them to him?”
Was that something Eli was supposed to be doing? He’d never done that before, and he felt another pang of guilt. “I trust your judgment,” he said. “I’ll give you some money for it. And if he likes it, we can get the rest of the series.”
“That’s great,” Maddie said. “They’re some of my favorite children’s books. Really great. To be honest, you should check them out yourself in your free time.”
“Maybe I will.” He wouldn’t. What free time was she talking about? If he had free time, he would be spending it at home with Charlie, not reading books. “So you and Charlie have been bonding well?” he asked.
“Oh, yeah. We had a great time today.”
“Yeah?”
“Why do you sound surprised? You know what a great kid he is!”
“Yeah, I do, I just don’t always get to hear it from other people,” Eli said. “I don’t know if I can express how nice it is to hear that someone likes your kid.” Damn, she wasn’t making it easy not to fall for her. Beautiful, smart, and she loved Charlie? Eli wasn’t looking for love, but if he had been, that would check all the boxes.
Not that he was falling for her. This thing he had been feeling lately was a passing thing, nothing more. She was attractive and had a great personality, that was all it was. It didn’t mean he was going to forget himself. It didn’t mean he was going to forget the nature of their relationship — strictly business.
She ran her finger around the rim of her wine glass.
Just that little gesture made Eli feel like his heart had missed a beat.
I’m in big trouble.
He cleared his throat. “Tell me what you and Charlie did today,” he suggested. “You mentioned that you were going to cook lunch together.”
“Yeah, we did. We saved some for you, like you asked. I can reheat it — although I’m guessing you probably don’t want a big spaghetti dinner this late at night.”
“Maybe I’ll take it to work with me tomorrow,” he suggested. “I appreciate you setting some aside.”
She bit her lip and hesitated. “If you do take it… I think you should let Charlie know what you think of it once you’ve eaten it,” she said. “I know he was so excited for that. He’d be thrilled to hear that you enjoyed it. He would get a real kick out of that.”
“I’ll be sure to let him know,” Eli agreed.
The truth was that he appreciated her saying so, because it was something he might not have thought to do on his own. It was slightly embarrassing to realize that. Of course he should compliment his son on the meal — was this Charlie’s very first time cooking something? God, he didn’t even know the answer to that.
“You know, he thinks the world of you,” Maddie said. “He talks about you all the time — only good things. He thinks you hung the moon.”
“I’m sure all little boys feel that way about their fathers.”
“To a degree, maybe, but you should know that he really does admire you. I hope you appreciate that, because I don’t think it’s something to be taken for granted. Not that I know much about what it’s like to be a father. I just see the way he looks up to you, and I think if I had a child, that would mean everything to me. I don’t want you to miss out on noticing that.”
Eli nodded. Maybe Maddie was right to question his parenting — as bad as that made him feel. She was right that the admiration she was describing wasn’t something he paid a lot of attention to. He wouldn’t have said he didn’t notice it, but he didn’t think about it — and he should.
“Did he have fun cooking?” he asked her.
She nodded. “He had a great time. He’s been saying he wants to become a cook when he grows up.” She glanced at him quickly.
“What?” Eli frowned. “You look like you have something else to say.”
“No, it’s just… I didn’t know how you were going to react to that,” she said. “The idea of him becoming a cook.”
“Well, he’s six. It’s not like he’s going off to culinary school tomorrow.”
“Yeah, I know. I just wasn’t sure if you wanted him to… I don’t know. Follow in your footsteps. Take over the family business.”
“Oh.”
“I didn’t mean to encourage him onto a different path, if that’s not something you wanted. I should have thought about that, or maybe asked you first.”
“It’s all right,” Eli assured her. “I’m not expecting him to go into tech. I don’t even know if I would want him to. It hasn’t made me that happy.”
“You don’t like your job?” Maddie frowned.
“It’s a job.”
“I just assumed it meant a lot to you. You put so much of your time into it.”
“I know. It’s what I’m good at, and I do care about doing well in my career. I’m proud of what I’ve achieved, and what my company does for people. But it’s not as if it’s something I’m so passionate about that I feel like my son needs to go into the same line of work. I’d rather he do whatever makes him happy, and if that turns out to be cooking, that’s fine with me.”
“I think that’s great of you,” Maddie said. “It’s good that he has that kind of support.”
“Did you have that kind of support?” Eli asked her. “I mean, did your parents get behind your dream of being a dancer? Or did they want you to do something else?”
“They were doubtful about it at first,” Maddie said. “They didn’t know if I was going to be able to make a career out of it. But once they heard enough positive feedback from my instructors, they did get on board. They were proud of me, and they supported my dreams.”
“You all must have been devastated when you were injured. What happened?”
“I fell,” Maddie said simply. “I had a bad landing after a leap, and I knew immediately that something was wrong — I felt it.”
“That sounds awful.”
“There are some things you just can’t recover from and go on dancing at that level,” Maddie said. “I’ll always be able to dance for fun, but… I had my sights set on being a professional ballerina, and I’m just not anywhere near that level now. My body won’t do the things it would have to do.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s all right,” Maddie said. “I’ve done my best with it. And if I’m able to open up a dance studio, that will make up for everything.”
“You’re trying to open a dance studio?”
“That’s the new dream,” she said. “Now that I can’t be a dancer myself, I want to teach young dancers. Help mold the next generation.” She grinned. “Maybe that’s a little silly.”
“I don’t think it’s silly,” Eli said earnestly. “I think remarkable. A lot of people who had been through what you have would probably turn their back on dance.”
“I could never do that,” Maddie said. “It’s the greatest passion of my life. Whatever else happens, dance will always be a part of me. I’ll never be able to let that go.”