Chapter 35 All the Things that Changed
thirty-five
All the Things that Changed
*MARCELLUS*
Itake my time in the restroom to have a couple of minutes to myself. Obviously, Eugene and I can’t keep the whole afternoon talking with each other, and frankly, I don’t think I’d want that.
“Here you are!”
I startle, spinning around to see Silas. I was so distracted, I didn’t even take up his scent. But now here, alone, I can finally hug him.
“Okay,” Silas says, his hands brushing over my back. “Do you think it would help if I blew you?”
I can’t fucking believe it! His suggestion almost makes me double over in laughter. “What? An actual blowjob? Here?”
“I thought it might help,” Silas says seriously.
“Somehow, this is the cutest thing you have ever said.”
“What?” he exclaims. “This is certainly not the cutest thing I have ever said! If that were true, I’d be really pathetic. And it’s not even cute! It’s sex!”
“I find it cute,” I point out. “Because you don’t usually offer sex that way, especially not in public. So, it means something. It’s sweet.”
“I hate that you somehow make sense,” Silas grumbles before reaching out his hand and brushing his long fingers through my hair. “And?” he asks quietly.
“I wouldn’t be opposed to a blowjob,” I say. “But maybe this is not the right place.”
“That’s not what I was talking about!”
“I know,” I sigh. “I guess I am doing okay?”
“Doesn’t sound too convincing when you phrase it as a question,” Silas points out.
“Eugene apologized, sincerely. You know, not a half-assed ‘I am sorry you felt that way’ apology but an actual one. He took responsibility and understood where he went wrong. It also looks like he spent the last years truly making amends and doing everything for the pack. I guess it was good to hear him apologize.”
“But?”
“It makes me sad, too.”
“Yes, I understand,” Silas says quietly. “Because it had gone so far that one of you had to apologize for something so terrible. And, because you now know that despite the apology, it still doesn’t mend things.”
“Yes,” I say, stunned. “It meant something to me that he apologized, but it’s still… he and I are still where we were yesterday, maybe a step closer to each other. But it didn’t magically make all the pain and disappointment go away. How did you know that this is exactly how I feel?”
“Experience,” Silas admits. “That’s how I feel with Durant.”
“And how do you handle it?”
“I give it time,” he says. “No relationship can heal overnight, that is, if it even heals and if you want it to heal. It’s up to you now.
You have the control over your decisions.
If you want to keep Eugene at arm’s length, it’s fine.
If you want to rekindle with him, it’s fine too, and I will pretend to enjoy his presence. ”
I laugh. “You would never be able to pretend that. You would totally freeze him out.”
Silas smirks. “Oh, would I?”
“Give it time, huh?”
“Yes, you don’t need to decide anything today or tomorrow. You can decide when you feel like it, and if you want to reach out a hand to him, you can do that on your terms, at your pace.”
I nod thoughtfully. “This makes me feel a little lighter.” My thoughts go back to what Eugene told me. “He said that Olive wanted to break up with him.”
“Your friend Florence told me the same,” Silas admits. “All this is just an explanation, though, not a real excuse. It doesn’t make me like Olive or your brother any.”
“I get that. I don’t think I like them much either, at the moment.” Maybe it sounds silly, but it just feels good to have someone in my corner, fighting for me and being angry for my sake when I can’t.
“And your parents?” Silas asks.
“I don’t know. It’s awkward even with Mom. I feel like they will want to continue where we stopped five years ago, but that’s impossible. Too much has changed.”
Silas nods, understanding in his eyes. “Give it time. Just like with Eugene.”
“Okay.” I sigh. “We have been hiding here for long enough, and there is a ton of paperwork waiting for us.”
Silas reaches out his hand, taking mine. “Let’s go.”
Silas and Eugene go through the necessary paperwork for our new pack members. Eugene is professional, I have to give him that, and he really put effort into saving the poor wolves. I will try to remember that at least. Nothing is all black and white. There are nuances, and maybe these are his.
However, I don’t need to be scared to soften up too much because whenever Silas and Eugene’s eyes meet, Silas looks like he wants to stab him with his pen.
Funny.
I can empathize with his reaction so much. Whenever Durant is around Silas, smiling and being friendly like he didn’t almost get him killed only five years ago, I want to stab him, too.
Meanwhile, I tackle the nth awkward moment today; they are uncountable by now.
I am talking to Dad. He knows quite some things about the pack these wolves are from, and I need to know the details.
Liam and I always make sure to get the whole story, so that we can investigate properly and ensure that the other pack members there are safe.
“It’s good to see that you are still you, while also having grown,” Floyd’s voice reaches me after Dad has left the room briefly. Floyd has returned from his own task to join our talk.
“You know, I guess I understand you much better now.”
Floyd blinks. “How come?”
“My beta, a high-ranking vampire, keeps knocking everyone about during training as well. Guess it’s in your nature.”
Floyd snorts. “Couldn’t resist the subtle dig, huh?”
“Not at all.”
He smiles. “It’s good to see you. I… I was hoping you would eventually return again, at least for a visit.”
“You never reached out to your friend?” I lower my voice to a murmur only he can hear.
He shakes his head.
I nod, not asking anymore. We both agreed on taking Floyd’s involvement with me disappearing to our graves.
He took a major risk for me back then, and I won’t forget that ever.
I will also never forget the kindness he showed me when Eugene turned against me.
It felt like, during that time, he was the only one who truly understood me.
“You weren’t all that bad,” I muse.
“Where does that come from?”
“I was just reminiscing,” I admit. “Thank you for everything.”
Floyd smiles and nods before his gaze shifts towards Silas and Eugene. Meanwhile, Dad returns with Mom, and with a folder in his hands. “Your mate really doesn’t like Eugene,” Floyd analyzes.
Mom makes sure to stand next to me, and I squeeze her shoulder gently. I am glad neither Dad nor her are making a big show right now. There is only so much I can deal with in one day. Acting normal is so much better for me right now.
“Yeah, he is his number one hater,” I say dryly.
Floyd grins. “He is not even trying to hide it. I appreciate the open pettiness.”
“Floyd,” Dad warns. “Eugene did so much for the pack. He worked relentlessly.”
“He did,” Floyd agrees. “But I need to tease him a little, so he won’t fall back into old ways.” He turns to me. “He really worked hard once the shock passed.”
“I can see that he changed a lot about the pack,” I admit. “Credit where credit is due.”
“Still,” Floyd’s gaze returns to Silas. “A vampire prince. Now that’s what I call quite an interesting catch.”
“He really is,” Mom says, for the first time since she’s seen me without looking like she is seeing a ghost. She smiles. “It puts my heart and mind at ease that you have someone at your side, Marcellus. When did you meet?”
“Only a couple of months after I left,” I explain. “It was fate, truly fate. Made the whole previous ordeal worth it.”
“You really think so?” Floyd asks.
“Yes. Without it, I would have never met Silas, and we wouldn’t have built the pack and coven together.”
“You meant to say poven,” Silas says, a passing comment. I always forget how sharp his ears are, easily rivaling a wolf’s hearing. He must have listened to our conversation and to Eugene at the same time. This man is truly multitasking.
“Poven?” Dad blinks.
I grin at Silas. “Now that you said it, I won’t ever let you live it down.”
A smirk curls his lips. “I know.” His smile turns icier again, his expression distanced when he turns back to his talk with Eugene.
“Let’s go to my office,” Dad offers. “To not disrupt them further.”
“That’s probably a good idea,” I agree.
“Do you mind if I join you?” Mom asks.
“Not at all.”
Floyd decides to stay back, probably to give us some privacy.
The whole interaction with him and Silas has put my mind at ease – it still feels awkward as fuck to be alone with my parents, but I now know I can handle everything on a professional level.
I don’t need to jump right into a tight relationship.
Once in his office, Dad offers me something to drink. “Just water, please,” I say. “I had a drink earlier with Eugene, and I need my senses to be able to handle my new pack members and be fully there for them.”
“It’s amazing what you built up,” Dad says. “I have heard a lot about your pack, and about what you’ve achieved.”
“To imagine you were so close all the time,” Mom says quietly. “At one point, we believed you’d left the country, because it was impossible to find you.”
“For a moment, I considered it,” I admit. “But then I found two young wolves who needed my help and decided to stick around for them. Then I met Silas, and the rest is history.”
“What did you do in the couple of months until you began building your pack?” Mom asks.
“I was still trying to find what I truly wanted to do,” I say evasively. I don’t want to tell her I lived as a rogue. She will blame herself if she knows, and I don’t really want her to. I cast a glance at my father, hoping he understands.
For a moment, he looks confused, then he pales a little. Fortunately, he doesn’t say anything to blow my ruse, just clears his throat. “You needed time,” he says, equally evasive.
“Exactly.”