Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
THEO
T he sun rises slowly, spreading a golden glow over the forest, but the sight that used to bring me solace now only reminds me of the burden I carry. There was a time when all I needed was my mother and the close-knit pack members who were more like family than friends. We didn’t live near the castle. Instead, we formed our own pack far from prying eyes. It was a life lived in seclusion and simplicity—a pack carved out of strength and loyalty, where bonds ran deep. I grew up being called an alpha without realizing what it meant, without understanding what I could lose.
Then, they came for us. For me.
The memories haunt me even now. Darkness fell around me then, but it wasn’t just the absence of the sun that night. A storm of death swept through our lands, cloaked in shadow and silence. I awoke not to screams, but to an eerie, suffocating quiet. And when I stepped outside, blood rained down on me—every person I’d loved was slaughtered, each felled by their own hunter. My mother, the last soul still alive, crawled toward me, begging me with her dying breath to stay hidden.
But the intruders were gone. They’d come for me, but not with the intention of taking my life. They sought to destroy me in the worst way possible, leaving me to live with the guilt of surviving and the weight of the lives that had been so cruelly stolen.
That was the end of everything I once knew about our world.
It’s been three years, but the silence of that evening never truly ended. It lingers, darkening my mind, never allowing me peace. And now, I’ve found myself further ensnared in a web of choices I can’t untangle, some of my own making and others thrust on me by one who wields his power like a weapon, unstoppable and uncontrollable.
Hope was fickle, death was welcome, and then…Estee arrived.
I’d spent months searching for my mate, a task given to me by way of threats and demands that I had no power to refuse. I thought of her as a means to an end, someone to fulfill a role. I didn’t expect her to be so enthralling, to have a presence that would unsettle me in ways I still don’t understand.
Though, none of that matters if I can’t fix what I’ve done, if I can’t find a way to my freedom without sacrificing anyone else.
I spent the night locked in my office, the walls closing in as I mulled over my options. Estee gave me twenty-four hours to prove to her that she shouldn’t walk away. Twenty-four hours to find a way to keep her here and safe. And as much as I wish that just being me could be enough for her, I know that isn’t the case. Nor should it be. Not when our bond is being used by another to create his own entertainment through my misery.
My wolf snarls within me, his growl echoing through my chest and making the silence in my office feel heavier. He’s not pleased with my thoughts of inadequacy, but that’s nothing new. He hasn’t agreed with anything I’ve done since the day I traded our future for my mother’s peace. A decision that’s shaped the fractured life we now live.
But that’s the past, and I can’t change it. The only path forward is to face what’s coming head-on, starting with the mess I’ve found myself in with Estee. It’s the only way I know to protect her, even if that means putting myself in more danger.
For hours, I’ve sat there, my hands in my hair, tugging until pain pulls me back into focus. I keep circling to the idea of telling Estee everything—laying bare the truth of my past, the bargain I made, the way my life’s been damned. But even now, there’s a voice in my head warning me away from that path, whispering threats and consequences I don’t fully understand. Though, I don’t know if it’s my own fear or his voice, creeping into my thoughts.
Jerome, my advisor, nudges at the edge of my consciousness, and after ignoring his presence for the last several hours, I let him in.
“Good morning, Your Majesty,” he states respectfully, even though I know I’ve frustrated him on too many days to count over the last year. “Princess Estee is still resting, but I thought it would be wise for you to take a walk through the town before she wakes, maybe address the people about your new mate.”
He’s not wrong; the pack deserves to see their king. But I’ve avoided them for a reason. How am I supposed to face them, knowing the truth of how I got here? That I was chosen not because of any honor I might possess or my strength, but because of a deal that’s bound me in unparalleled ways. When the truth comes out—as it almost always does—they’ll despise me. And that’s a future I’m not prepared for. Not now that Estee’s come into my life.
“The pack is eager to hear about their new queen, Sire.” Jerome’s urgent tone tells me I shouldn’t decline his suggestion as I usually do.
I give myself a once-over. My clothes are wrinkled from having spent half the night sitting on the ground beneath the window with my back against the wall. Hell, I don’t even smell the best. Yet, I yearn to have my mate’s acceptance. With a shake of my head, I realize it’s time I began treating myself better. I said yesterday that I would fight for her and no matter how twisted my thoughts have become over the years thanks to the mind games I’ve been trapped in, I can’t forget there’s more at stake now than ever before.
By overcoming the self-doubts and no longer hiding behind these walls, maybe I can show Estee that I’m worthy of the bond we share and not the coward of an alpha I’ve considered myself these past months.
I open my office door and greet Jerome, who stands on the opposite side of the door, patient as ever. “I’ll shower and change first then we’ll head out.”
His eyes widen. “Yes, Sire. I’ll organize a group of guards to join us.”
My head shakes. “It’s not necessary. The two of us will be plenty.”
“Your Majesty, if I may insist?—”
“You can, but just the same, I can decline.” My voice is stern. “Be ready within the hour.”
As I stride past him, guilt nips at the edges of my thoughts. Jerome’s been nothing but loyal to me, and I’ve repaid that allegiance with stubbornness and silence. Though, that doesn’t change my mind about the guards.
I make my way to my private quarters, pushing open the doors and entering my bedroom with a renewed sense of purpose. Everything I do now has to be in pursuit of Estee, of her acceptance. The motions of showering, shaving, and changing into fresh clothes are routine, but with my new motivation, the small acts feel significant. As if I’m shedding more than just the grime of the night and previous day. I’m also freeing myself from the layers of doubt and fear that have held me captive for years.
It’s no longer about what I’ve lost, but what I have to gain. At least that’s what I need to keep reminding myself of.
Dressed in a crisp charcoal shirt and fitted black slacks, I stand in front of the mirror. The dark circles under my eyes are gone, the stubble on my cheeks has been shaved clean, and my eyes have regained some of their old spark.
My wolf paces within me, his pride and strength bolstering my resolve. I can’t change what’s happened, but I can change how I move forward. Estee deserves a mate who fights for her, not a king who cowers to his demons.
When I enter the formal sitting area of my private quarters, Jerome is standing near the fireplace, his hands clasped behind his back, patiently waiting for me.
Fine lines stand out around his eyes and sparse strands of grey are woven through his short hair. Gods, I’ve really been mentally absent if I didn’t notice my closest advisor is much older than I believed.
Moving to stand in front of him, I meet his gaze respectfully. “I’m sorry, Jerome.”
“Your Majesty.” He bows his head. “As king, you should never have to apologize.”
“Yet, I have plenty of reason to. But maybe what you and the rest of the pack need isn’t an apology. You need me to show you that I haven’t forsaken our home, that I can be the leader Selaris deserves.”
His curiosity is tangible as he looks up at me. “I think the people would appreciate that, Sire.”
“Then, let’s start with showing them I’m still here and available to them.” I move toward the door, but Jerome clears his throat, stopping me.
“I must prepare you, Sire.” His tone is uncertain. “Going out into the public, you might find that there are those who wish to see you gone, that believe you unworthy of the throne.”
My smile is genuine as I try to ease his concern. “That’s nothing I didn’t already assume. I’m prepared for them to question my authority. I know I have a lot to make up for, but I can’t do it from inside this castle.”
“No, Your Majesty, you can’t.” He turns toward the door and opens it for me before bowing.
As I pass him, I stop to clasp his shoulder. “Thank you for never faltering in your duty, Jerome. Your support hasn’t gone unnoticed.”
He nods. “Thank you, Sire.”
I walk past him, and together, we make our way down the castle’s winding staircases. I’ve kept the staff within this palace sparse as there hasn’t been a need with so few guests staying within these walls, but maybe that’s something else I need to change.
Bringing life back into this kingdom is second to fortifying the bond I share with Estee, but that doesn’t mean I can’t strive for both.
I make mental notes as we walk and share my thoughts with Jerome. Things like adding color into the castle by updating some of the portraits and tapestries on the walls.
Once we exit through the main doors, the path leading to the outer gates of the castle goes right into the heart of our market. The morning light touches everything—cobblestone streets, the wooden stalls of the merchants, the quaint, weathered homes—and as I walk deeper into the area, I feel the eyes of my people fall on me like a physical touch. Shocked stares turn to worry, distrust, and even anger as the murmurs begin.
“How dare he show his face now?”
“ Now he comes to walk among us?”
“Someone should take his head off.”
The hostility rolls over me in waves, but I knew this was coming. Nothing close to a warm welcome, yet still more than I deserve. I let my wolf rise within me, his presence steadying me, grounding me in the strength of our bond.
At the center of the market square, I stop, tapping into the mental connection I share with my pack. They may not respect me as their alpha, but today they’re going to hear me.
“I know you have no reason to trust me.” There’s no point pretending otherwise. “But I’m here to ask for your forgiveness anyway. I’ve been an absent leader, and I sincerely apologize for that. I also know that my words won’t be enough to earn your pardon, but I come to you today, vowing to do better as your king, to be better for our pack.”
The emotions swirling through the shared bond are chaotic—fury, disbelief, suspicion—but there’s a sliver of hope as well, hidden beneath the bitterness.
“As you’ve heard, I found my mate,” I continue. “While the details of that are being worked out, I’m also going to be opening my doors to speak with anyone who wishes to voice the issues that have gone unresolved for far too long, and I promise to begin making changes to better all your lives, one day at a time.”
“Lies!” a man yells from a shadowed alleyway. “How about we start making our own changes, beginning with ending your reign?”
The voice doesn’t belong to anyone I can find a connection to. My wolf pushes forward, enhancing my senses, but the presence is gone before I can pinpoint him. Yet, the damage is already done.
“Yeah, maybe we should,” one shifter agrees then another.
“Who’s to say you’re even fit to lead?”
But before the muttering can turn into a full-blown uprising, a clear, steady voice cuts through the noise. “Or perhaps,” a woman says, “our time for struggle is over. Perhaps King Theo, alongside the soon-to-be Queen Estee, will unite Selaris in ways we haven’t seen in centuries.”
Elyn Holton.
One of the oldest members residing in our kingdom and a healer. I’ve never spoken directly to her, but that seems about to change.
She approaches me and places a hand over my chest before speaking into my mind. “The debt you bear is strong, but you must find a way to see the truth.”
“What truth?” More importantly, how the hell does she know about my debt ?
She doesn’t answer me. Instead, she walks away as if her show of support didn’t just shock every pack member crowding in around me.
“Might I suggest we go back to the castle, my King?” Jerome’s concerned voice sounds through my mind next. “I think this was enough for today.”
He may be right, and I’ll go, but our business isn’t done just yet.
Tapping back into the connection with my pack, I leave them with one final statement. “If you’d like to meet with me, I’ll set aside several hours a day, four days a week, beginning within the next few days. Changes will be happening as quickly as I’m capable of implementing them, beginning with a celebratory ball for all that’s to come. Expect an invitation within the coming weeks.”
Jerome’s displeasure is clear, but the castle isn’t only mine. It’s an extension of our pack, and I want them to feel welcome. Not only that, but I also want Estee to know how much her presence is going to mean to our people if she chooses to stay.
She wouldn’t only be my mate; she’d also become the queen of Selaris.
Something that I hope to see happen because there has to be a way that I can still protect my mother and have Estee in my life.
No matter what it takes, I’m going to fight for that future.