Chapter Eleven
Cooper
My naked reflection stared back at me in the mirror, and I tried to regard myself with some objectivity, but I wasn’t sure that was even possible.
I’d never worked very hard for my body. I liked going to the gym, but I didn’t train hard.
My diet of highly processed foods would no doubt catch up with me one day, but it hadn’t yet.
Overall, I liked my body, and Patrick seemed to as well.
But the thought of a whole room of people looking at me in nothing but my underwear as Patrick literally tied me up and put me on display, had me questioning how other people might perceive me.
After running my fingers over the light dusting of hair that covered my chest and stomach, I called Patrick.
“Hey, everything okay?” he asked upon answering.
“Um. Kind of. Should I be shaving for this demo or something?”
“Did I tell you to shave?”
I panicked for a second, trying to recall if he’d instructed me to do it and I’d not remembered, but it really didn’t ring any bells.
“Errrr. I don’t think so, Sir.”
“Exactly. If I wanted you shaved, I’d have probably done it myself. I like your body hair, it suits you. When we did the trial run, you looked fucking exquisite, baby boy.”
I felt the heat of my blushing all the way to the tips of my ears.
Earlier in the week, Patrick had invited me over to try out the rope harnesses he was going to demo on me tonight.
He’d explained that it had been a long time since he’d done it.
But it must have been like riding a bike because I’d fallen into a trance as Patrick had methodically and gently wrapped the soft rope around my body, making strategic knots until I’d felt like nothing more than a very cherished mannequin.
“Sorry, Daddy. I’m just a bit nervous, I think.”
“It’s okay to be nervous. You know that if you change your mind and you don’t want to do this, you can call red and nothing will change between us?”
I paused to think about that. Maybe a part of me worried that it would change something because I’d be letting Patrick down. But I also did want to do it.
“I do still want to do it, Daddy. When we practised, I was so floaty, and it was fine because it was just me and you and I knew you’d keep me safe, but I’m scared of being like that in public.
” I rushed the last part out, worried if I thought too much about it, I’d chicken out of telling him the truth, but Patrick was very big on me being honest about how I felt within scenes.
“I’m really proud of you, you know that?” Patrick replied.
“You are?” I wasn’t convinced I’d done anything to make Patrick proud.
“You told me exactly what was making you worried, and now hopefully we can figure something out to alleviate some of that.”
“We can?”
“We can. You already know you have your colours, you can use them at any point during the demo if it feels too much. You do go into subspace beautifully, Cooper, and I suspect you will regardless of our audience, but my job is still to take care of you, not them. If everything goes to plan, once the demo is over, I’ve got some comfy clothes for you to wear, and you’ll sit on my knee for as long as you need.
Some people might come up and ask me questions, but if I think you aren’t up to that, we’ll go somewhere more private, and I’ll take their questions another time.
Afterwards, I’ll bring you back to mine and we’ll treat it like the end of any other scene. How does that sound?”
I almost couldn’t respond because it sounded perfect. It sounded like Patrick had really given thought to what I might need and had come up with a plan to see me through it. I wasn’t sure anyone had ever given me the level of consideration that Patrick did, and I wasn’t sure what to do with it.
“Sounds, um… great. Thank you, Sir.”
“Good. I’ll pick you up at eight. See you soon, baby boy.”
I was grateful that Patrick didn’t once let go of my hand as we entered Foxholes and he signed us both in.
As he and Jessica discussed some minor details about the demo, I took a moment to ogle Patrick because I’d never seen him dressed up before.
He’d left the top few buttons on his crisp black shirt undone, revealing some of the hairs on his chest that I loved to rub my face against. It was fitted close enough to his body that under the light I could spot the outline of the barbells in his nipples.
Patrick loved it when I flicked them with my tongue.
I blushed when I recalled that the black leather belt he was wearing through the loops of his black jeans was the same he’d used to bind my wrists together and tie me to the headboard one time.
The dark outfit made him appear more intimidating than usual, and it sent a thrill down my spine. He wasn’t mine mine, but for tonight he was.
The first and only time I’d come to Foxholes, Markus had left me feeling like there was something wrong with me.
And this time, I was here hand in hand with an alpha who didn’t think I was broken.
Who admired my bigger frame and didn’t judge me for wanting to kneel and be good for my Dom rather than expect me to want rough hands and degrading words.
I stood a little taller with Patrick by my side.
“I’ll take you through to the demo room,” Jessica said, smiling at me and giving cautious glances to Patrick, which I didn’t understand and made my stomach feel a little funny.
“We ended up putting you in the bigger room, there’s been a lot of interest, and it’s been a while since we had a rigger who would demo,” Jessica explained, again giving Patrick a strange look.
He merely grunted in response.
The room was larger than I’d expected, and there were a lot more chairs for people to watch than I’d anticipated. I gulped.
Patrick squeezed my hand. “Focus on me. Nobody else, okay?”
“Yes, Sir.” I took a few deep breaths and kept my attention on Patrick.
There was a low stage on one side of the room with a table on which several hanks of rope had already been laid out along with some bottles of water.
“How long would you like to prepare before I start letting people in?” Jessica asked.
“Fifteen minutes,” Patrick replied, his tone terse.
Jessica nodded before leaving us alone.
“Colour?” Patrick asked.
“Green, Daddy.”
Patrick nodded and guided me up onto the stage. The lights pointing down from above actually made it easy to block out all the chairs facing us, although I understood Patrick would be addressing the audience throughout.
“I think you’ll be less nervous if I get you out of your head a bit before people come in, what do you think?” Patrick cupped my face with one hand and gently rubbed his thumb over my cheekbone.
“Yes, please, Daddy.”
He kissed me on the nose and smiled. I couldn’t spot any discomfort in his eyes, but how tense he’d been around Jessica was nagging at my gut.
“Sir? Can I ask you a question? You don’t have to answer, of course…”
Patrick arched a quizzical eyebrow at me. “Of course you can. What’s up?”
“Is something wrong? Between you and… Jessica?”
Patrick’s eyes shuttered in a way that had my stomach dropping out. He seemed to shake it off, and although he still looked a little sad, he didn’t seem so closed off.
He sighed. “I’ll explain more another time because it’s a long story.
It’s nothing you need to worry about, though.
Jessica kept something from me that was important, and I’ve discovered I’m not very forgiving.
I’m still angry with her, but I should probably hide it better in public. ” He looked a bit sheepish.
“You don’t have to hide it in front of me, though?” I really hoped that Patrick didn’t consider me a random member of the public, anyway.
“You shouldn’t have to see me being grouchy about ancient grievances that are not your problem. I’ll play nicer with Jess. Now, let’s get you out of these clothes, okay?”
I nodded, and let Patrick strip me down to a small pair of black briefs.
When we’d practised at his cottage, I’d been completely naked, but I’d changed my mind about being fully exposed in public.
Patrick hadn’t seemed to mind telling me “I won’t ever complain at being the only one who gets to see the goods” and giving me a wink.
Patrick grabbed a cushion that’d been leaning against one of the table legs and dropped it on the floor. “Kneel here facing away from the audience, and hold your hands behind your back,” he said.
Having instructions to follow eased a lot of my nerves, and when I was in position, Patrick took one of the shorter black ropes from the table and used it to bind my wrists together before connecting them to my ankles.
It forced my shoulders back and my chest out.
Patrick returned to stand in front of me and reached down to pinch my nipples, making a sharp gasp escape my lips.
“It all feel okay?” he asked. Patrick had explained when we’d practised that it was important to let him know if the rope was pinching my skin or restricting my circulation too much.
“Feels good, Daddy.”
Being tied up so I couldn’t move quieted my brain.
I didn’t have to think about where to put my hands because they were locked in place.
I didn’t have to decide how to sit or position myself because Daddy had decided for me.
It was peaceful, and all I had to do was stay still and stare at my Dom until he gave me another instruction.
“Here, have some water,” he said, removing the lid from a bottle and holding it to my lips. He was careful not to spill while I took a few sips. The water was refreshing. My mouth had gone dry from the nerves, and I hadn’t realised how thirsty I’d been.
“Jessica has opened the door now. People are going to start coming in and taking their seats, but you don’t need to focus on them. Who do you focus on?”
“You, Daddy,” I replied easily.