Chapter Eleven #2
“Exactly, little fox. You’re just my beautiful fox to tie up and display tonight, you don’t need to think because I’m thinking for you.
You’re just my perfect doll to play with, aren’t you?
” Patrick’s voice was gentle. Abstractly, I thought being told I was merely a doll should be demeaning, but it didn’t feel that way from his lips.
Patrick’s gaze was hot and heavy on me, his sole focus despite all the people taking their seats behind me.
“Yes, Daddy,” I whispered, and Patrick grinned, flashing me that life-altering dimple.
There was evidently something wrong with me because my cock stirred at the sight, and then I began to panic.
“Hey. Hey, what’s wrong?” Patrick knelt down and held my face in both hands, his eyes boring into mine.
“What if… what if I get hard on stage?” I whispered frantically.
“Honestly, I think it’s unlikely, but if I notice you’re hard, I’ll turn your back to the audience and adjust you so the waistband on your briefs hides it, okay?”
I nodded. That seemed reasonable enough.
“Good boy. Try to relax and we’ll start in a few minutes.”
I took some deep, steadying breaths and let my mind focus on the bindings around my wrists and ankles as I watched Patrick checking through all the lengths of rope on the table, inspecting them for any damage.
Patrick had the sexiest hands. Strong, thick fingers with a dusting of hair on the knuckles.
He kept his fingernails cut short, and I suspected he filed them, too, because they were always very smooth.
I was pretty grateful, given how frequently they were inside my mouth and my hole.
My cheeks warmed at the recollection of Patrick spreading me over his lap as he’d fingered me for what’d felt like hours.
“Thinking about something naughty, baby boy?” Patrick smirked at me.
“Maybe, Daddy.”
He laughed before glancing over my head and nodding his agreement to someone. I heard the door shut and the low chatter in the room died down.
“Evening, everyone. I’m Patrick… I’ve been practising shibari for more or less the last decade, and this beautiful boy here is my sub, Cooper. Like many of you, he’s also a beginner, although has taken to it like a duck to water.”
Pride swelled in my chest at that.
“If you have any questions during the demo, please put your hand up or come and find me afterwards. Direct all questions to me, not Cooper. We’re going to begin with a really basic chest harness.
Pain and discomfort aren’t my boy’s thing, so I’m using a really soft bamboo rope.
It’s also hypoallergenic, so it’s a reliable rope to use with anyone.
It’s quite an expensive option compared with cotton, so I’d be sure that shibari is for you before you invest. I also would only recommend this for floor work.
This rope has quite a lot of stretch and give, so I wouldn’t use it for any kind of suspension.
Again, if you’re just starting out, then you shouldn’t be suspending people anyway. ”
I’d been so focussed on the soft timbre of Patrick’s voice that I was surprised to hear a few soft chuckles from the audience.
Patrick moved behind me and began undoing the bindings on my wrists and ankles as he explained a bit more to the audience.
He helped me to stand, and I shook out my arms and legs since I’d been kneeling in that position for longer than I was used to.
“Okay?” he checked in.
“Yes, Sir.”
“Good boy. Lower your gaze and then turn to face forwards for me.”
I found a spot on the floor just slightly beyond my own feet to stare at, not even glancing at the people sitting beyond, and I relaxed my body as Patrick retrieved another rope and continued his explanation.
The first harness required nothing from me except to stand still and turn around when Patrick prompted me.
A vibrant red rope adorned my skin and accentuated my pecs in a way I knew Patrick loved.
In the privacy of his cottage, he’d spent an agonising length of time teasing my nipples as the rope binding me had seemed to make them even more sensitive than usual.
Although he didn’t demonstrate that part, Patrick did verbally explain some of the accompanying play which can be fun with a harness like this one, and my entire chest was flushed by the end.
Once he was finished, Patrick answered a couple of questions before untying me and began to explain the second demonstration of a dragonfly harness.
This was my favourite of the three. I’d discovered through this that I liked having my arms bound. The restriction was comforting, and it stripped me of autonomy and decisions in a way that sank my brain into that floaty place I loved.
Patrick’s voice, aimed at the audience and not me, faded into the background like a soft lullaby that relaxed me but I didn’t need to focus on.
This harness required a lot of knots, but Patrick worked his way through them deftly, occasionally checking in that it wasn’t pinching my skin or squeezing my arms too tight.
Daddy maneuvered me so my back was to the audience and showed them how he’d bound my arms. I loved how he always kept his hands on me somewhere, anchoring me.
Callouses ran along the top of his palm, and they brushed against my skin like a solid reminder that these hands couldn’t be mistaken for anyone else’s.
It seemed like no time had passed before he was already untying me and massaging the muscles which had been briefly constricted.
“Still with me, baby boy?” Daddy was talking to me, but it must have taken too long for them to register because Daddy frowned.
“Hey, colour?” he pressed.
“Green.” Even to my ears the word sounded a bit slurred. My brain felt slow and syrupy, but I was happy.
“Damn, baby. You sink too well sometimes.” He kissed me briefly on the lips and then gently turned me to face the front again.
“The final demo we’re doing is the large diamond karada.
It’s one of my favourites, actually. It’s considerably harder than the other two, mostly because it doesn’t use any knots; it relies on friction to maintain the rope’s position.
However, once you’re confident with it, the absence of knots allows for a lot more flow to the process.
The final result, as you’ll appreciate at the end, is beautiful. ”
Daddy was right. I’d looked at myself in his mirror for a long time when he’d finished this one earlier in the week.
Done completely naked, the end result was incredibly exposing, framing my pecs tightly and pushing my cock and balls slightly forward so that nothing was hidden.
Daddy had showered me with praise before making me brace my hands against the mirror and fucking me from behind.
I’d never seen myself getting fucked before, and all tied up, I’d felt owned by him.
Even now as he wound the ropes around me, each time he fixed part of it in place, it was a physical reminder that, even if it was only temporary, in this moment, I belonged to him.
Daddy was careful when he ran the ropes between my thighs so he didn’t brush against my cock and balls more than necessary, respecting my wishes to avoid getting aroused on stage in front of strangers.
Once he was finished and I stood there exposed and vulnerable while Daddy answered questions, I began to get antsy.
I must have made a noise without realising it, because Daddy stopped talking mid-sentence to check on me.
He didn’t ask me what I needed, and I wasn’t sure I knew, either.
I was uncomfortable and not in a kinky floaty way. In an agitated way.
Daddy got the pillow from earlier and placed it on the floor. “Kneel, baby boy.”
I knelt for him, which helped a little.
“Look at me.”
I did, without hesitation.
“Open,” Daddy instructed.
The moment I parted my lips, Daddy stuck two of his big fingers into my mouth for me to suck on, and my whole body relaxed. I kept my eyes closed and let the feeling of his warm skin resting on my tongue quiet everything around me.
I was in the meltiest, floatiest space when a voice broke through and Daddy tensed all over.
“A beautiful boy you have there, Sir,” the voice said.
I glanced up at Patrick, who’d gone as still as a statue.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Max?”
Max? No.
“Can we talk somewhere private?” Max asked.
Patrick removed his fingers from my mouth and helped me to my feet.
“I have nothing to say to you,” he replied gruffly as he untied all the rope from my body in a very perfunctory manner. My brain was stuck, I’d fallen too deep into subspace, and now I was being pulled out of it too fast. Everything was too bright and too loud and I was too exposed.
“Clothes. I need clothes. Daddy, I need clothes,” I mumbled over and over.
Patrick grabbed some teddy bear fleece pyjamas from a bag at the edge of the stage, and my whole body started trembling.
“You need to leave, Max. I don’t know what you were thinking, approaching me here of all places.”
“Respectfully, Sir, you didn’t leave me many options. You moved house and didn’t tell me where. Your mum certainly wouldn’t tell me—”
“You went to my mum? Have you ever met a fucking boundary in your life that you didn’t trample over?” Patrick interrupted.
Max’s gaze lowered at that, clearly embarrassed.
I’d tugged on the fluffy pyjamas but still couldn’t stop shivering.
“Come on, Cooper. Let’s go.”
Hearing my name was like a bucket of ice water thrown over my head. I wasn’t his baby boy or his little fox. I was Cooper again, and it was too soon. The marks from the rope hadn’t even faded from my skin, and I was already expected to know what to think and say and do.
I tried to tuck my hands into my sleeves to hide how much I was shaking. Daddy was stressed, and I needed to keep it together, but trying to get my brain to form a coherent thought was like wading through mud.
We left Max behind, but his sudden appearance was still an albatross around my neck as I followed Patrick out to the car and we got in. I angled myself to face the window so I could wipe my tears as surreptitiously as possible. Patrick was silent the whole drive home.
He pulled up outside my flat, and I glanced at him, confused.
“Sorry. I wasn’t expecting to see… him tonight, and I need to be alone.”
There was no room in what he said for negotiation.
The fact I absolutely needed to not be alone didn’t matter.
Panic rose from my stomach, up and up until it sat like a golf ball in my throat.
Less than an hour ago, I’d been tied up, almost naked on a stage in front of strangers, and now I was going to be left all alone while I came down from it.
My mind kept flickering with the thought “this isn’t right.
This isn’t what we agreed.” But Daddy wouldn’t leave me alone right now if he thought I couldn’t handle it, would he?
Somewhere in the pit of my stomach, I knew that tonight had been both the beginning and the end of us. We’d reached the summit only for the force of Patrick’s past to push us off the cliff and into the violent ocean below.
I wanted to ask him when I’d next see or speak to him, but I was too afraid of the answer, so I didn’t say anything at all.