Chapter 7
SAWYER
“W hat’s that?” Riley answers the door and looks at the bottle of wine I’m holding like she ain’t ever seen one before.
“Darlin’, I wasn’t raised by wolves. I know that when a woman invites a guy round to her house, the polite thing to do is show up with wine.” I step inside and hand it over to her.
“Sawyer, this isn’t a date. I invited you over so we could have a serious conversation.” She’s looking nervous, and hot-as-fuckin’-sin in those tight jeans she had on earlier and an oversized, light pink sweater.
“So, I take it that you found my profile sheet and decided I was your best option.” I stretch my arms out in front of me confidently before spreading myself out on her couch. The place looks much cozier than it did the last time I was here. It seems to me that Riley Hale really is looking to settle down here in Clearwater Creek.
“I got it.” She rolls her eyes like she thinks I'm pathetic, and I decide to humor her as I place my feet up on her coffee table and lean back.
“Please, make yourself at home.” She shakes her head sarcastically as she climbs over my legs to take the seat beside me, placing the two wine glasses she picked out from the cupboard and a corkscrew on the table by my feet.
“I heard you had Maddison and Isabel over earlier.” I sit up after she swats my feet down, then, taking the bottle from the table, I set to work opening it.
Ever since that night Riley told me she wanted to have a baby, all I’ve been able to think about is giving her one. I want to see her getting all big and round like Maddison, and I already know there’s no way I could stand to see Riley carrying a child that belongs to any other man than me.
“I was never gonna eat all that cake by myself,” she tells me as I pour her and myself a glass and pass it over to her.
“It’s good to hear of you making the effort, I’m sure Jean will put it in her next newsletter.” I clink my glass against hers before taking a sip.
“Sawyer, you know I didn’t call you over to talk about my social interactions.” She takes a long drink of her wine before placing it down with a shaky hand.
“Riley Hale, are you nervous?” I look at her suspiciously.
“Of course, I’m nervous. I’m making a huge decision about my future,” she snaps back at me, and when I go to take her hand, she snatches it away.
“Do you know how serious all this is? It’s not a joke or a game.”
“I know, and I’ve thought about it real hard, Riley. I want to do this.”
“But why?” She stares at me with eyes full of doubt and confusion.
“Because...” I shift a little closer to her. “...I get the sense that not many people in this world have been good to you. I wanna change that.” There's no lies in the words I’m telling her now, and maybe I'm being deceptive in the promises I’m about to make to her, but that's only because I’m desperate. Riley is stubborn and determined; she’s gonna make herself a momma one way or another, and I have to ensure that when she does, the baby she has is mine. My hand moves up to stroke her cheek, and just for a fraction of a second, she leans into it.
“All this has to stop.” She quickly stands up and moves to the other side of the table. “If we’re gonna do this, we have to be clear about what this is.” She stops to take a breath. “I’m doing this by myself, it’s my baby. Once I’m pregnant, your role in all this is over, and I know that sounds cold and harsh, but it’s how things have to be.” She studies me for a reaction. “Do you understand that because it’s vital that you do? We can’t go into this with you thinking it could be any other way.”
“I get it, but I’ll be honest, I don’t understand it. You're beautiful, you’re smart, and so fuckin’ strong. Why do I get the feeling that you’re scared to let someone love you?” I narrow my eyes at her.
“Sawyer, you're so off the mark. I don’t have to give you my reasons; what's important is that I make everything clear. You are no different from any of the men who were on those profiles. You are a donor, and that is all. I’m grateful for your offer. In fact, I’m a little overwhelmed by it, but if you can’t agree to my terms, this ends right here.”
I wanna stand up and shake the truth out of her, but I also want to fuck my baby into her so I have to put all my questions to one side and convince her that I’m okay with what she wants.
“I agree to your terms,” I tell her.
“You haven’t even heard them yet.” She throws her arms in the air as if she needs the Lord’s help, before taking another huge gulp of wine.
“I’m sorry, I’ve just never been one for technicalities.” I shrug.
“This is important, there can’t be any grey areas or blurred lines, can you please just take this seriously?” she begs, having no idea just how fuckin’ serious I am. Time has only made me more certain of what I want, and I want to be the man who makes this woman happy. I wanna own all her smiles and that cold, black heart of hers. I’ve never heard Riley laugh for anyone the way she does for me, and surely that has to stand for something.
This woman doesn’t think she’s lovable, and I’m gonna show her that she’s wrong.
“Come on, let's hear ‘em.” I lean forward, resting my elbows on my knees.
“Don’t you wanna write them down so you don’t forget?” She stares at me curiously.
“I’ve got a good memory.”
“I will, of course, have a lawyer write up something for us both to sign. The clinic had a contract we could use as a guideline.” She places down her glass and pours herself more wine.
“Sure.” I look up at her and nod.
“How are you so calm about this?” She shakes her head at me.
“Because I’ve been waiting three months for you to say yes to me,” I answer her honestly, and just when I start to fear that I’ve given too much of myself away, she smiles and sinks down onto the couch beside me.
“First rule, and the most important of them all, is that you don’t fall in love with me. It won’t be reciprocated?—”
“Don’t flatter yourself, sweetheart.” She looks embarrassed when I laugh at her. “I’ve spent twenty-eight years on this plant and not fallen once.” I offer her some reassurance, though it feels like the first false promise I’m gonna have to commit to tonight.
“Good.” She breathes a sigh of relief.
“I guess the next thing we should discuss is how we do this.” Seeing her cheeks go rosy as she stumbles on her words makes my dick fuckin’ hard.
“Well, if you don’t know, then we should…”
“Of course, I know. What I meant was, do you want to go the traditional route or the more professional one?” She clears her voice and squirms in her seat while she waits for me to answer.
“I think that since we’re already familiar with each other, and for convenience, it would be better to do things traditionally. Probably more fun too.” I wink.
“Yeah.” She goes into a little trance. I notice the way her eyes are focusing on my lips and how her tongue slips out from her mouth so she can wet her own. “I mean if that's how you’d prefer.” She quickly snaps back to the moment and the very important terms she wants laid out.
“And there was you thinking I was getting nothing out of this.” I try to ease the tension, and it gets a laugh out of her, albeit a nervous one.
“When we decide we’re gonna start, I’ll come off my pill and start tracking my ovulation, there's a time frame when we should…You know, be active.”
“Sounds good.” I take in what she’s saying and nod my head.
“Naturally, I’m gonna have to ask that if you sleep with anyone else during the process, you use protection.” She fiddles with her fingers nervously, and I place my hand over hers.
“Goes without saying.” I could admit to her that I’ve been unable to think of sleeping with anyone but her since she’s been in town, and that despite all Beth Delaney’s efforts, I’m suffering with a serious case of blue balls, but I don’t. Some things are better left unsaid.
“We should have rules about how we are together, too. Like today, you shouldn’t have kissed me. It crosses a line.”
“So I’m allowed to put my cock in you but I’m not allowed to kiss you?” I raise my eyebrow to point out how stupid that sounds.
“Putting your… Insertion is essential to the cause, kissing is not. It’s too intimate.”
“No kissing,” I agree, wondering how the hell I’m gonna stick to that when all I’ve thought about for months is kissing her. Today, I lost all restraint, and I haven’t got a single regret for it.
“And one last time, I need to hear you say that you are fully aware that the baby will be mine. You have no rights or obligations.”
“No rights, no obligations, Riley. The kid’s all yours.” I spit on my hand and hold it out for her to shake, and she shocks me when she spits on her palm and takes a firm grip of mine.
“Cool, let's make a baby.” I stand up and look for the bedroom.
“Wait. We can’t start this now, I need to speak to a solicitor about getting that paperwork drawn up, and I’m still taking contraception.” She looks shocked.
“And where do you keep this contraception?” I ask.
“In the bathroom, why is that important?” She follows me when I head down her hallway to locate the bathroom.
“Sawyer, what are you doing?” She watches from the doorway as I start looking through her cabinet.
“I’m fixing the birth control situation,” I tell her, rummaging around to try and find her pills, they aren’t on the bathroom unit by her toothbrush.
“We’re not starting this now; we need to get the paperwork done, and there are things I need to take care of.”
“What kind of things?” I pause from my search and turn to face her.
“I…um…” She gets all flappy and hesitant, the way she always does when she’s about to lie. “Things that aren’t your concern.” She crosses her arms as if she’s mad, but I ignore her and get back to my mission.
“Sawyer, don’t you think we should have a cooling-off period?” She pulls on my arm, and when I see the shiny foil packet catch the corner of my eye, I quickly pull it out of her makeup bag before turning back around.
“Riley Hale, do you want to get pregnant?” I ask, holding her pills up between us.
“Yes, of course, I do, but–”
“Then stop coming up with excuses and let’s get to it.” She watches in shock as I head over to the toilet, lift the lid, and one by one pop each pill out of the foil so they fall to the bottom of it.
“I…told you, I have things I need to do first.” She shakes her head, then swallows thickly when I press the flush.
“What do you need taken care of?” I step up close to her and ask, because right now there ain’t nothing in the world that I’m gonna let stop me from making sure she belongs to me.
“I told you, that’s my business. I’ll deal with it.” She scowls at me, looking all on edge and fucking beautiful. I wanna tell her that anything involving her just became my business too, but it would make her doubt everything I just promised her, and I can’t have that, not until I know I’ve got a part of me growing inside her.
“Then deal with it.” I lean my head down so our lips almost touch, then remembering her rule, I divert them to her ear. “Because we’re starting right here. I’m gonna fuck a baby into you, Sheriff Hale, and you’re gonna enjoy every fuckin’ second of how it feels.”