Chapter XXXVIII
Roman
I heard Junie’s squeals of delight the moment I stepped into the cabin after another long, taxing day. Her happiness offered a flicker of solace.
I’d never wanted a season to be over more—or less.
On the surface, everything was going according to plan.
The Bureau had approved several couples.
Ratings were through the roof. Even if the studio was tearing into me daily over the internet’s obsession with Demi and me.
Apparently, I couldn’t hide my feelings for her to save my life.
Still, they were letting me keep my job.
A job that now felt trite. Especially in light of what Demi could do.
Truth was, she was the one who’d worked magic this season. Not me. And despite everything I’d tried, I couldn’t help her.
Ten days until the August full moon, and I was no closer to finding her true love.
So while my show soared, the world was about to lose one of its greatest gifts in a millennium. And it was all my fault.
I walked through the cabin looking for Junie, hoping whatever had her squealing with delight might rub off on me. At the very least, I just needed a hug. But the cabin was empty—no Junie, no Mom.
I headed for the backyard, only to stop short when I caught a glimpse through the window.
Now I understood the giggling. The cheering.
It appeared that what had made Junie happy was the same thing that would make me more than happy if the fates would allow it. Demi. There she was, spinning round and round with Junie until they both fell to the grass and gazed up at the dusky sky.
How I wanted to join them. But as it stood, Demi was currently driving me mad.
Miserable, even. Thanks to her, I didn’t know what was up or down anymore.
And don’t even get me going on Cassie and Jonas.
What the hell had happened there? I had not seen that one coming.
But they were hot and heavy. I couldn’t tell if the ordeal had upset Demi or if she’d just given up.
I felt like I was missing something. More like someone—her.
Demi would hardly even look at me when I interviewed her. And anytime I saw her, she made it a point to ignore me. Not that I blamed her. I’d begged her not to tempt me, and she’d done what I asked. Except she didn’t need to be near me to tempt me. She just needed to exist.
I would be tortured by her touch for the rest of my life. Always longing for it. Even now, I wanted to run to her. To fall beside her in the grass and let the world blur around us.
But I held back.
I just watched.
Watched the way she smiled at Junie and pointed to the sky, as if telling her a story that was so sacred that it could only be whispered.
Lady Goldy circled above them, a sentinel in flight.
My mom sat on the deck, quiet and still, something serene on her face—like she was trying to memorize the moment.
She knew.
We all did.
Soon, the memory might be all we had left of Demi.
And every time I thought about it, the void in me grew.
The longer Junie and Demi whispered between each other, the more Junie curled into her. The more the ache in me grew. To go to them. To know what secrets they shared. To belong in that moment.
Before I knew it, I was opening the door, unable to fight the pull.
Demi flinched the moment it creaked open, her head snapping toward me.
“I better go,” she said quickly, disentangling herself from Junie and springing to her feet. “I didn’t mean to stay so long this time.”
This time?
How many times had she been here? And why hadn’t anyone told me? More and more, I felt like I was missing something.
“You can stay,” I said, the words stumbling out. I didn’t want her to go.
She wouldn’t look at me.
“That’s okay,” she chirped, too bright, too fast.
Did she hate me? Blame me for going back on my promise?
Hell, I’d been trying. Every day I tested new men, put out feelers, chased leads. I’d even started doing the research myself, searching for only the best among our kind. But it had all led nowhere. And I’d lost sleep over it. Over her. Wishing she were lying next to me.
Demi bent to hug Junie.
“Don’t forget to practice those handstands and cartwheels. We’ll work on them more tomorrow.”
Tomorrow?
Had Junie been taking gymnastics lessons from Demi?
I looked at my mom, my face a silent question.
She set her book down and stood, smiling at me with zero apology.
Demi waved her goodbyes and made a beeline for the door, clearly hoping to slip past me.
Not happening. I reached out and caught her hand.
“Please stop,” I begged.
She froze but didn’t turn around. Yet, she didn’t pull away. If anything, her fingers curled tighter around mine. Our connection was as strong as ever. Her touch instantly eased the void inside me.
“I’ve been wanting to talk to you. How are you?”
I’d tried yesterday during her interview to find out how she was feeling, but she’d sidestepped every question.
She’d barely reacted when I brought up Cassie and Jonas.
Even they were flippant about it—like it wasn’t a big deal that one minute Jonas was singing a love song, my love song, to Demi and the next he was groping Cassie every chance he got.
I didn’t know what to make of it.
“Fine. Just fine,” she said breathlessly.
“How can you be fine?”
I wasn’t. It gutted me to know that in ten days she would cease to exist—to our world, to my world. There was nothing fine about that.
“I just need you to know I’m still trying to help you.”
“I know,” she sighed, pulling away. “Goodbye, Roman.”
I didn’t like her tone. It sounded too final.
She walked through the door, and I called after her.
“We still have ten days.”
Even as the words left my mouth, I knew how flat they sounded.
Mom sidled up to me. “You should go after her.”
Every part of me was screaming to, but . . . “I can’t.”
“Why?”
“You know why.” I collapsed in the chair nearest me and watched Junie as she cartwheeled around the small lawn. Her form was almost perfect.
“How often has Demi come over?” I asked, more to myself than to Mom.
She sat beside me, calm as ever. “Almost every day for the last week or so.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I grumbled.
“Because she didn’t think you’d like it. And I think she just wants to be herself for as long as she can. Remember that once she was a gymnast and made people smile.”
I scrubbed a hand over my beard, feeling more like a jerk than ever.
Not only had I failed to make good on my promise to help her, but I’d made her feel like she meant so little to me that she had to sneak around just to see my family.
At a time when she was probably feeling vulnerable.
When her best friend and ex-boyfriend were—who knew what.
Lovers? Were they even trying to help her?
“It’s just hard for me to be around her.”
Mom took my hand.
“I don’t understand why you don’t just tell the girl you love her. It’s clear you do. You’ve loved her since the moment you saw her on TV.”
Mom was probably right. But I’d had no idea what love even was back then. And I’d spent so many years hating Demi, it was hard to believe I’d ever once loved her.
“I can’t do that to her. I can’t ask her to live with a locked heart. I don’t even know if she’ll remember me in ten days. Worse—if she’ll even know herself.”
Mom’s grip tightened.
“As far as I can tell, even with it locked, she has more heart than most people I know.”
She leaned in, voice soft but fierce.
“And if she forgets who you are, then find her. Remind her. Son, love is worth fighting for. You, of all people, should know that.”
She smiled, teasing but telling the truth.
“I don’t care if you aren’t her true love. I don’t see him anywhere helping her the way you are. Even if you’re being stupid by keeping yourself from her.”
She let go of my hand.
“You’re just hurting her. And yourself.”
I let her words sink in. I wanted nothing more than to tell Demi I loved her, but . . . “What if down the road she resents me for preventing her from finding her true love?”
Mom’s eyes didn’t waver.
“Did you ever stop to think that’s what you’re already doing? She so clearly wants to love you.”
“But she can’t.”
Why couldn’t she understand? Demi had locked her heart.
Mom only shrugged.
“I don’t believe it. I see the way she is with Junie. How she talks about her mom. How she stays away from you because she thinks that’s what you want. That girl loves. I don’t even think she realizes it.”
Her words cut deep because they rang true.
I’d watched Demi heal people, listen to them, care for them—even when her own life was on the line. If that wasn’t love, I didn’t know what was.
And more than that, she’d changed since she’d been here. It was as if she’d uncovered some hidden part of her heart all on her own.
Was that possible?
Could I really ask her to risk all of her heart for me? Could I ask her to forgo the chance at true love? Worse—could I ask her to risk the wrath of Zeus if she failed this quest?
Would she think I was worth the risk?