12. The Simplest Reason
THE SIMPLEST REASON
“ Y ou’re not putting enough pressure on the ball,” Daphne said an hour later.
“Huh?” he asked.
It was the look on his face when she turned to see why he asked that.
She grabbed some of the beef that they’d mixed spices in and rolled it into a ball. “You need to apply pressure to get it to form. Then you slap it down. If it breaks too much then you didn’t do it right. I saw one of the chefs do it at my last job.”
“Oh,” he said. “The meatball. That’s what you’re talking about.”
He’d actually crossed his legs when she was explaining.
She felt the heat fill her face. They’d stayed inside to talk where the air conditioning was running, but he’d lit the grill and they were going to sit on the deck while he cooked.
She was stunned she’d said as much as she had about her background, but it didn’t feel as if there was a reason to hold that back now.
It was as she’d said, he had seen her naked. Might as well bare her soul. Or parts of it.
“If I handled you that way that night, you wouldn’t have wanted to talk to me again,” she said, then put her hand in front of her mouth. It was covered with meat and she started to cough and gag.
He laughed. “You don’t know that,” he said.
She was spitting in his sink and felt like an idiot. Talk about having no manners.
She turned the water on to wash her hands and then ran the soapy water around her mouth again.
When she turned, Abe was laughing so hard that his eyes were watering.
“It’s not funny,” she said. “You can get food poisoning with raw meat.”
“True,” he said. “But you didn’t swallow it.”
“No,” she said. “I’ve made such a fool of myself in front of you. This is just one more thing. I don’t date often and now I know why.”
“I’m of the firm belief that if you can’t be yourself in front of someone, then don’t waste your time. I’m not running. Though if you slap my balls down like you did that meatball, sorry, I’m not sure how I’ll react.”
“You said you might like it,” she said innocently.
He stopped laughing. The air got thick and she wondered if he was going to lean in and kiss her.
Though she told herself that wasn’t going to happen, she realized she wouldn’t fight him off if it did happen.
Worse yet, she wanted him to do it!
What a scary thought that was to have.
He cleared his throat and took a step back. “Not sure I want to find out,” he said. “I think the grill is ready if you want to finish getting them ready, but I’ll go check.”
“Sure,” she said, her eyes landing on his back while he walked out.
Maybe they traveled down to his ass while she was at it.
It was hard not to when she remembered her hands on his bare ass cheeks holding him tight to her as they were rocking on the hotel bed.
Yeah, there went the flames over her body again.
This was a mistake.
She put her hands on the counter, her head down, taking a few deep breaths.
He chose that moment to come back in.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, rushing toward her. “Are you feeling ill from that raw meat?”
He squatted down and got under her so that he was beneath her face. She let out a snort. “If I was going to get sick, you’re in the line of it.”
He jumped back fast. “Come sit down.”
“I’m not going to get sick unless embarrassment can make someone puke. Is that possible?”
She looked at him and he stopped to stare at her. “What do we need to do to get past this? I’m not embarrassed. We both participated in it. It was a first for me like you. Why can’t we just agree it happened, we enjoyed it, but we are going to move on again and get to know each other now?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’ve spent so much of my life worrying what people thought of me. I come to a new area and start fresh where no one knows my background. Then I do something so slutty that if I was back home everyone would be talking about me worse than they already did.”
“Come here,” he said. He pulled her into his arms and held her. She didn’t feel desire right then. She felt comfort. He was rubbing her back and trying to soothe her. “Nothing that night was slutty. I don’t think that way of you at all. Never. I’m not sure how to get you to understand that.”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I appreciate you being patient like this. I don’t know many men who would be.”
“Just shows you what a great guy I am. Remember, Poppy said it. If you can’t believe her, who can you?”
She let out a snort and pushed back with a smile on her face. “I know,” she said. “Just from being here, I like you, Abe. I do. I liked talking to you that night and there was something you made me feel.”
“What?” he asked. “Let’s just go to that. What made you do it?”
“I was lonely,” she said. “That’s the simplest reason. I didn’t go there thinking that was going to happen. Never. It just did.”
“That’s right,” he said. “It happened. You felt something with me and I want you to feel that again. Whether I made you feel safe or comfortable.”
“Both,” she said. “Added to the attraction.”
“Well, duh,” he said. “That’s a given. I’m a pretty good catch.”
She laughed. “You’ve got a great personality too.”
“Glad you think that,” he said. “Why don’t we start to cook this meat so we don’t get sick?”
She turned back to the meat and finished forming the patties with him. The two of them slapping the balls down at the same time and then laughing.
“You’re pretty good at that,” she said ten minutes later when he was flipping the burgers over.
Her eyes might be on his biceps.
She couldn’t remember if she ever thought of a guy’s arms as much as she had since she’d seen Abe’s.
It wasn’t like his biceps were big, but they were so defined.
There were ridges and bumps in places in the front and back that she didn’t know even existed.
She always thought Aster was in excellent condition, but he was nothing like Abe.
“I’d rather grill than anything else,” he said. “But I can do it all.”
“All, huh?” she asked.
He closed one eye at her. “You’ve got a great personality too.”
“Thanks,” she said. “I don’t even try. If I’m relaxed enough.”
“I’m glad to know you are. I’m serious, Daphne, put it behind you. Tell me what I need to do for you to do that.”
“It’s just going to take time.”
“I’ve got all the time in the world,” he said. “No one else seems to be knocking on my door. Least of all with pasta salad.”
“I’ll remember that,” she said. “Guess you’re pretty easy on a few levels.”
“No comment,” he said, closing one eye at her. “Want to hand me that plate?”
She stood up and handed it over, he put the burgers on them. They’d already brought out her salad and the rolls.
“No ketchup or are you one of those people who uses mayo?”
“On a burger?” he asked. “People do that?”
“The appalled look on your face says it all,” she said. “Thank God. That might be a deal breaker for me.”
“Do you want another drink while I get it?”
“Sure,” she said.
She put her burger on the roll while he was in the house and then scooped some pasta salad on her plate.
“Here you go,” he said, pulling his seat out and making his plate too.
The two of them ate in silence for a minute or two. She was trying to figure out what else she could say without putting her foot in her mouth.
“What’s going through your mind right now?”
“At this minute?” he asked. She nodded her head as she took another bite. “I’m trying to figure out how to have another meal with you like this. It might be the most relaxed I’ve been around a woman in years. How about you?”
“That was the best thing you could have said to me right now.”
“Damn, I’m batting a thousand tonight,” he said, picking his beer up and tilting it toward her.
“Might be we both are.”