Chapter Eighteen
Dagmar
D agmar switched off her phone and put it down. She’d told her mum that James had set plans in motion for saving the café and now they just had to wait for the money. Apparently buying the property from the landlord was not out of the realm of possibility. Probably as it was small and not in the best condition, though it had a great location on the main street in Glenbriar.
She took a deep breath and stepped out of the office into the yard. After her talk with Kristi the other day, she felt like she was on the cusp of something with James. Especially as he didn’t seem that interested in Victoria anymore. But did Dagmar really stand a chance? And what exactly did she want? Kristi had suggested a fling, and that seemed by far the most sensible thing. She could play this casually. Why not? Her time had come. She just wasn’t sure how to approach it with James without looking stupid. Flirting was definitely not her strong point.
And what if he said no?
A groan escaped her, and she hurried inside the stable block. The idea of doing anything with James other than the lessons was possibly so crazy she should just drop it. Yes. That was what she had to do.
‘Hey.’
Dagmar jumped, recognising James’s voice. ‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, spinning around. ‘It’s not time for your lesson yet.’ The words tumbled out because she felt she had to cover herself, as though, somehow, he might have broken into her brain and heard what she’d just been thinking about him.
His lips curled into a smile. ‘I know, but I finished early, and I fancied spending some time here. With the horses… And you.’
She swallowed and took a step back. ‘Me?’
‘Yeah, you. I don’t mean I want to get in your way or anything, but I like being with you.’
‘You do?’ Her heart raced, her thoughts a tangled mess. Had he actually read her mind? Could he know that moments ago she’d been desperately trying to figure out a way to take what they had to another level? She’d talked herself out of it, thinking he might not want to… But here he was, pretty much telling her outright it was exactly what he wanted.
‘Of course I do,’ he said. ‘And I still have to repay you for dinner. When are you free?’
‘Free? Oh… I, um, will have to check.’
‘Just let me know when suits. Am I allowed to ride Conker on my own on the bridle path, or is it still too risky?’
She pulled a side pout. ‘It would probably be fine, but as Conker’s Ophelia’s horse, I don’t think you should. If you want to tack him and Zephyra up, I could come with you. I have a couple of things to get ready for tomorrow’s lessons, but after that, I’m flexible.’
‘Ok. I’ll do that.’
She left him to it, muttering to herself as she went into the field to set up the fences. Really, it was now or never. He’d practically asked her on a date.
Be brave. You can do this … Whatever it was.
When she returned to the stables, James had the horses tacked up and was chatting to them in his soft voice. His tone was so low and mesmerising that Dagmar wouldn’t mind listening to it all day.
‘Ready?’ she said.
‘Yeah, all good here.’ He turned and smiled.
‘Let’s go then.’ They headed outside, and Dagmar led Zephyra alongside the mounting block before getting on. She kept Zephyra ahead of James as they headed across the yard, giving herself time to breathe, to think. It wasn’t like he was ever going to choose her as a forever partner, but what about that fling? Maybe if she agreed to the dinner, things would progress from there. That was what happened in films and on TV.
‘Have you had a good day?’ James asked, catching up to her.
‘Yeah, it’s been ok. I did some lessons with three of the High School kids who use riding as a kind of therapy.’
‘Does it work?’
‘It does while they’re here, but the teacher told me as soon as they get back to school, everything goes back to normal. She also said there was a lot of resentment from other pupils who didn’t get why the “naughty” ones should get perks like horse riding. And to be honest, I get where they’re coming from.’
‘Not ideal, but hopefully it’s doing something for them, even if the results haven’t shown up yet.’
She kept her gaze ahead. ‘I hope so too.’
‘I know some nice places we could go for dinner, by the way. But if you don’t want to, just tell me and I’ll shut up about it.’
She glanced at him and held her breath. Even in his riding hat, his dark eyes and sharp features were strong and alluring. ‘I… Well, I suppose so. I mean… Yes, ok. If you’re definitely not seeing Victoria.’
He shook his head. ‘Definitely not. I think my parents are still holding a candle for her, but I can’t. She does nothing for me.’
‘Oh.’ She looked forward. ‘And I do?’
‘Yes, you do. I know we didn’t start out on a good footing, but I’m always happy when I’m with you. It just feels… Relaxed. Not like the way I was around Ophelia and Victoria when everything is tense and stressed.’
Dagmar took a deep breath. ‘Thing is… I’ve never… Well, you know…’ Her voice trailed off, her cheeks burning. ‘I don’t have a lot of time for relationships. It’s never bothered me too much before, but now…’ She looked away, a lump rising in her throat, constricting her and stopping further words from coming out.
‘Now?’
She didn’t look at him or reply.
‘When you say you’ve never had time for relationships…’ He paused. ‘Do you mean…? Look, I think I get what you’re trying to say. And in that case, I didn’t mean I was trying anything on or forcing you into anything. I literally meant dinner.’
‘I see.’ She shook her head, turning her eyes back to him. ‘Nothing more.’
‘Well… Not unless you want more. I don’t want to push you into anything.’
Her pulse was now drumming so loudly in her ear she was convinced he would hear it. ‘Yes, I want more.’
‘Do you?’ His voice was a little shaky. ‘What do you want?’
‘I want to have a fling. You can teach me whatever I need to know. Just like I taught you with the horses. We’ll keep it casual, let it run its course until we’re ready to move on.’
He opened his mouth for a moment, then closed it again. ‘Are you…’ Conker’s head twitched as he shook off a fly and James made much the same movement, like he was trying to shake himself. ‘Is that really what you want?’
‘Yes. Just a casual relationship. You can do that, can’t you?’
He raised his eyebrow. ‘I… I think so.’
‘Good.’ Though she wasn’t sure she could. She’d fancied him forever, but if stories were to be believed, first times were always hideous, so maybe this experience would turn her off to him. Assuming he agreed. His dark eyes watched her, and her insides turned over. If he could do this much damage just with a look, she was in trouble.
‘If that’s what you want.’
Her heart stopped, and she could hardly breathe. Maybe she hadn’t really expected him to say yes, or maybe the reality was sinking in. The euphoria she’d expected to feel didn’t hit. Instead, a wash of worries and practical considerations swept through her so quickly she couldn’t catch any of them and put them into words.
‘Let’s start with dinner,’ James said. ‘We can take things from there.’
‘Ok. Where?’
‘Anywhere you like.’
‘But what if someone sees us?’
He gave a little shrug. ‘Does that matter? I’m not ashamed to be seen with you, if that’s what you’re thinking.’
‘No. I just thought you might be worried about meeting Victoria or her parents.’
‘Why should I be? But if you think it’ll be a problem, how about I get a takeaway, and we eat at my house?’
‘Ok.’ She blinked, then a smile twitched at the corner of her lips. ‘Sounds good.’
This was it. She was going on a real date – with James Charlton. Her teenage self wouldn’t believe it.
James smiled. ‘Let’s stop here a minute.’ He steered Conker into a clearing and dismounted. ‘Come here and let me show you something.’
‘Show me what?’ She rubbed Zephyra’s neck, taking a deep breath.
Still holding Conker’s rein, James moved closer. ‘Come here.’ He held out his hand.
Dagmar hesitated for a moment, then swung her leg over and slid off her horse, landing lightly beside him. James stepped closer still; his eyes locked on hers. Warmth radiated from his body, along with his trademark scent.
‘Can I kiss you?’ he asked, his voice barely more than a whisper.
Dagmar’s heart pounded in her chest. She clung tightly to Zephyra’s rein, not because she was worried she’d bolt, but because she needed something to hold on to. Before she could think, she found herself nodding. ‘Ok… Though we should probably take off the hats. Won’t they get in the way?’ Maybe she only mentioned it because her brain was pushing practical things at her to avoid the moment she knew was coming.
‘Oh, sure.’ James unclipped his hat, pulled it off and laid it down on the ground. Dagmar clung onto hers, not sure what she’d do with her hands if she didn’t. Her eyes were on James, and he was watching her. Gently, he lifted her chin with his free thumb and forefinger. The contact sent tingles soaring to her nerve ends. He leaned in, holding her face softly. The moment his lips touched hers, her breath caught. His lips were smooth, the kiss tentative at first. Something instinctive took over, and she closed her eyes, relaxing into his mouth, pressing closer. She pushed her hat under her arm, still clutching Zephyra’s rein, and her free hand wound around his neck. The kiss deepened, sending a shiver down her spine.
James’s tongue grazed hers, and she gasped at the shock of sensations ricocheting around her. Why had she never done this before? It was so lush.
When they finally pulled apart, she was breathless, a smile tugging at her lips. The euphoria she’d expected earlier had arrived, and her veins were overflowing with happy hormones.
James brushed a strand of hair from her face. ‘There, how was that?’
‘I… Um…’ She wasn’t sure how to put it into words. ‘It was… perfect.’
‘Perfect?’ He nodded, still smiling. ‘Let’s hope we haven’t peaked too soon.’
‘Indeed.’ She let out a little laugh.
‘So, are you good for Friday night? I’ll come for you around six if you are.’
‘Yeah… I’m good for that.’
‘Good.’ He lifted his hat off the ground. ‘We’ll take it easy. No pressure, no rush.’
‘Ok.’ Dagmar’s heart and mind raced each other at breakneck speed as she and James rode back to the stables. The kiss. Oh god, that kiss. Now she’d had a taste, she wanted more, and soon. Her insides burned raw. James rode close beside her, catching her eye every now and again and smiling.
Once they reached the stables, Dagmar dismounted and led Zephyra into her stall, her heart still spiking with every little glance from James. He followed her, a glint sparking in his eye, and a wolfish smile on his lips. As she turned to leave the stall, he grabbed her hand and pulled her into a darkened corner of the stable.
‘James, what are you—’
‘Nothing… Unless you want to.’
‘Want to what? Kiss you again,’ she whispered, glancing around. ‘In here?’
‘No one’s watching. Except Zephyra, and I don’t think she minds.’
Dagmar let out a little giggle. ‘Ok then.’
With a smile, James leaned in and kissed her again, pinning her up against the stable wall. This kiss was urgent, all-consuming, and Dagmar melted into it, her hands finding their way into his hair.
His lips were so warm and soft. Heat flooded through her at the contact, and James groaned, hauling her closer, deepening the kiss, tangling his tongue with hers. His hands slipped round her hips, and he ground against her. She’d not expected this, but it didn’t feel strange. Something about it was all so natural, and even as she was savouring the moment, it occurred to her that it probably felt like this at any time of life… As long as you were kissing the right person.
‘You have no idea what you do to me,’ James murmured.
‘Oh, I think I do,’ she whispered with a little grin. She had power over him. The power to make him lose control, to desire her. An inner goddess woke at the thought, like Epona the horse goddess riding free and wild, and Dagmar tugged his head close, bringing him in for another kiss. He held her firmly against him and she was goo in his arms.
When they broke apart, his eyes were dark with desire. ‘It’s going to take all my willpower not to have you right here and now,’ he murmured against her lips.
Dagmar’s breath hitched, a shiver running through her. ‘Then don’t leave.’ Did it really matter if they had dinner or whatever first? The only thing she was hungry for was him.
He groaned, resting his forehead against hers. ‘I have to. There are people talking outside. It’s too risky. Plus, I can’t stay late. I’m working tomorrow, and I have an important meeting. This is important too and I don’t want to rush it.’
‘But…’
‘I know. I don’t want to go either.’ His thumb brushed her cheek. ‘But let me come back on Friday. We’ll make it a night to remember.’
Dagmar sighed. ‘Ok. Friday.’ She’d waited this long. Another few nights wouldn’t hurt, though she guessed they would be the longest of her life.
James smiled, stealing one more quick kiss before stepping back. ‘See you Friday.’
‘Ok, see you then.’ She watched as he reluctantly left the stables.
She leaned against the wall for a moment. Friday couldn’t come soon enough.