Chapter 16
H eart racing, I closed the safe and noticed the mess. I had left the printouts everywhere even on the floor. If Dad came up now, he would catch me. It would take too long to collect the copies and hide them.
So I had no choice but to run. I ran to the gallery.
“I’ll be right there, Dad. I’ll just change quickly. I’m feeling much better.” Had I sounded euphoric enough? Why was I so scared? Even if Dad found out what I’d done, what did I think he would do to me?
I peered down into the spacious foyer. Dad was just coming into view. “I’m glad,” he said, smiling in my direction. “You look better too. You have really rosy cheeks, my child.”
I swallowed and thought of the last letter that I hadn’t finished reading. “I’ll be right there, Dad. Five minutes. What’s for dinner?”
“Oh, quite mundane: Danny’s Burger.”
“With Beluga?”
“Of course.”
I rushed back and tried to relax. I quickly gathered all the papers and shut down the computer.
I was about to slip out when something occurred to me.
If the last letter was what I suspected, I needed a copy.
And immediately. I listened and heard Dad clattering dishes downstairs. He wouldn’t hear the copier.
I quickly ran to the safe, copied the letter, and put the original back so he wouldn’t notice. Then, I turned off the printer and restocked it with paper.
Just before I went out, I glanced around the study. Okay, everything was as it was before. He wouldn’t suspect anything. I locked the door as quietly as possible, put the key on the frame, and scurried across to my wing.
“Willa? Are you coming?”
Oh God! It sounded like Dad was coming up the stairs.
For a moment, I stood frozen in the hall, not knowing what to do with the papers, but then I ran into my room and tucked the papers under my mattress. That way I could at least be sure he wouldn’t find them while I was sleeping.
“I’m almost done!” I then called out extra loudly.
“The burgers are getting cold, darling.”
“I’m hurrying…Dad.”
God, please don’t let him suspect anything!
To make it look like I was truly getting better, I slipped into a dress for the first time in a long time; a pink silk dress with a boat neck and ruffles along the knee-length hem.
Dad had bought it in Milan and loved the way it looked on me.
Without looking in the mirror, I brushed rouge on my face, combed my hair, and put on a pair of ballet flats. Done!
With my heart pounding, I glanced at my bed. I really wanted to look at that copy, but I could always do that later. Besides, if what I found there confused me completely, I couldn’t afford that.
As I descended the stairs, my mind was buzzing like a badly tuned radio station.
STR analysis. DNA sample from the mother. An impressive illusion of reality .
I felt sick. I probably couldn’t eat a bite of Danny’s Burger.
Suddenly, I also felt my bare thighs and the cool air between my legs.
I suddenly felt like I was back in Isaac’s dark green t-shirt.
For a few seconds, I felt dizzy, but I told myself that I couldn’t allow myself to have a panic attack now.
I took a few deep breaths and concentrated on the deception I had to pull off.
Deceive Dad, and then get out of here with the evidence as quickly as possible.
Or wait out the week until the staff returns and then get out of here.
“You look pretty,” Dad said as I entered the dining room, but a barely perceptible shadow covered his features.
Had he noticed something? No, he was staring at my upper arms. The dress didn’t cover all my scars. I hadn’t thought of that in the rush.
A dark feeling descended upon me, but I still forced myself to smile. “Thank you.”
STR analysis. DNA sample from the mother , my mind continued pounding.
Dad studied me as if he could read the thoughts behind my forehead, and he was still looking at me when I sat.
You’ve kept so much from me! Nathan’s heart, Grandma’s letters. The letter from the art gallery .
I wanted to scream, but I suppressed the urge.
It was quiet during the meal. Contrary to my old habits, I ate with my fingers, which earned me sidelong glances from Dad, but I ignored them.
And even though the fishy smell of the beluga disgusted me, I told myself to keep eating and swallow my disgust. I didn’t know what disgusted me so much.
Maybe it was everything I’d learned today.
I heard Dad chewing and knew I had to say something so he wouldn’t get suspicious. I just didn’t know what. Hey, I found Grandma’s letters today!
As the silence crackled in my ears like danger, I brought up the most obvious topic that came to mind. “Have you found someone to blame yet? I mean in regards to the doctored reports.”
Dad was cutting up a piece of his burger neatly with a fork and knife and gave me a quick glance. “That will take a while.”
“Have you shut down the oil company yet?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
He paused, his fork mid-air. “No company that size is shut down just like that. Besides, I also have to speak to the head of the Foreign Trade Association of Mineral, Oil, and Energy. Perhaps a clean solution can be found for our company.”
“A clean solution?” I repeated, stunned.
Dad’s eyes narrowed. His deep breath seemed impatient.
“America needs Canada’s oil, Willa Rae. We may just have to adjust a few production steps.
It works for other companies too. And as for your question about who was responsible, there were several parties involved.
Since they’re all blaming each other, it’s hard to state anything specific at this point. ”
“Ah. Okay.” I watched him eat and wondered why he seemed so disgruntled. Maybe the safe security system had sounded an alarm and informed him.
I set the burger down. “Dad?”
“Yes, love?” He was smiling now, but it looked strained.
Something wasn’t right. “What’s wrong?” My voice sounded thin. I hated feeling so helpless.
Dad cleared his throat awkwardly and set his cutlery aside. “I didn’t want to tell you because it’s going to bother you.”
“What?” I whispered.
“Isaac McCormack.”
I felt dizzy. “What about him?”
Dad made a face as if the sword of Damocles was hanging over my head. “He’s not dead. Bill Luther said he has been seen around here. It appears he wants to finish what he didn’t do before.”
Suddenly, I could hear nothing but my heartbeat, a thunderous gallop in my chest. Blood rushed through my veins. For a few seconds, my rational thinking was paralyzed. Kjertan—or Rayk—must have shot Isaac, but not fatally wounded him. And Isaac obviously knew I was back home.
Dad reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “I’m sorry, Willa. That’s not all. Two of his accomplices are constantly hanging around Greenwich Street, watching the penthouse.”
Billy and Maury?
“I gave Bill Luther orders to arrest them immediately if they do anything conspicuous. If necessary, we’ll force a confession out of them.”
I jumped up. My mind was spinning and my throat tightened. Isaac couldn’t possibly still be alive! But what if he was? What if Nathan and the others had kept it from me to protect me? Or if they believed he was dead, but he was only unconscious?
I bit my knuckles until I tasted blood, but I couldn’t quell his voice inside me.
Stop crying, Willa Nevaeh Rae—you like that, don’t you? I wonder if Nath did that to you, you cheap little whore .
It was incomprehensible. I couldn’t move or speak. Within seconds, I turned into the lifeless shell I had been in the days after my release and well beyond.
Should I come visit you tonight, little lady?
“Willa? Willa Mouse?”
My dad’s voice came from a vast ocean without light. I noticed in passing that, despite my stillness inside, I was getting up and fleeing. I don’t remember where, but the ground suddenly seemed like a soft mass, the same mass that filled my head. My knees buckled.
Suddenly, Dad was standing over me and his face blurred, turning into Isaac’s.
“No!” I screamed and thrashed about, catching him somewhere. I heard him calling my name, but it sounded far away.
Willa! Willa! Willa! Calm down!
Be brave, my child.
Be brave …
Suddenly, everything around me dissolved. Just like in the weeks after my release when Nathan had given me the Remedji, the decoction of poppy, belladonna, and coca. Everything became soft and I sank into blackness. I became completely calm.
I was floating on a sea without waves, without water, and without memory. No time.
Mom is back but she doesn’t see me. I come from the bathroom on the Voyageur II about to go out onto the sun deck when I hear my parents arguing. They rarely argue and their loud voices frighten me. I quickly hide behind Alexandré’s luxury couch, which is right in front of me.
“Don’t lie to me, Ivy-Rose! You stopped taking the pills.” That’s my dad, he sounds irritated.
“I don’t know what you mean.” Mom sounds cool in comparison.
“They were in Willa Rae’s stuffed bunny—are you going to deny it?”
It’s quiet for a while, and in that silence, my heart is pounding in my throat. I hope Dad doesn’t betray me. Mom should never find out that I told him about our plan.
“We should turn around, Nicholas. The horizon is too dark and Willa is afraid of thunderstorms.”
“You want to go back so you can leave! So you can leave me! Where were you going anyway? To your mother or a lover I don’t know about?”
I crawl around the corner of the couch and catch a glimpse of Mom across the seat. Her face is as white as the wall. “You gave me a drug that causes severe depression. It’s not even allowed to be prescribed anymore,” she says now. “That’s assault.”
Dad doesn’t even bat an eyelid. “I’m keeping you safe. That’s all.”
“By giving me something that makes me sick?”
“You’re not safe outside.”
Mom stares at him, stunned. “I’ve read the letter. The one from the police department.”
“You were in my office?”
“Florentine and Nicholas Jr.—they were killed. The Forb Hotel… It was arson.”