Chapter 15
C aroline lay awake, staring at the ceiling. Her hands were clasped over her chest. Her heart was still thrumming from the previous night. It wasn’t like anything she had expected at all. For such a strong man, Ryan was loving and tender. His frantic breaths echoed in her ears, and the heat from his body still lingered.
It was as though she had been baptized by fire, yet there were no marks left upon her skin. It had all gone deeper than that, sinking into the deepest parts of her as they revealed themselves to each other as they had never done before. The world had been shaken by what they had done, and Caroline was irrevocably changed.
She also believed that she would have felt guilty afterwards, but that wasn’t true either. Her conscience was clear, and she did not feel as though she had given anything to him or that he had stolen something from her. In fact, she had gained a lot.
She tilted her head across at his sleeping form. He lay with his back to her, the great bulk of his body rising and falling as he breathed. She gently touched him with her fingers, feeling the heat that radiated off him and the lust that was contained within his powerful muscles. With her other hand, she twirled her hand, her fingers brushing the rise of her breast, thinking about how he had kissed her in so many special ways, and how she had learned so much about nature in the span of one night.
Ryan could be a frustrating individual indeed, but as she reflected on his gentle nature, she realized that there were things to love about him. When she looked at him, she did not merely see the man who stood before her, but also the boy that was left behind, ravaged with grief over the death of two people who meant the world to him.
While she was certain her father was justified in his actions, it did not make it any less sorrowful that these things had to happen. She couldn’t imagine how difficult it must have been to rise up and salvage the clan from that tragedy, but Ryan had somehow managed it. He had grown immensely and forged himself into the laird that his people needed, taking them from strength to strength with his cunning and his wisdom. They had all been eager to celebrate his wedding, and now she understood why.
It was because they loved him, just as the Gilmour people had loved her father. She never would have thought it from the first time they met, but there were a lot of similarities between the two men.
Ryan stirred at her touch and rolled over, gazing at her with his brooding eyes. He brushed a curl from her face. Caroline offered him a sweet smile. Things had accelerated quickly the previous night. They had gone from a terse argument to bed together, and she wasn’t entirely sure how things stood between them.
“Caroline, last night was…” he trailed away, unable to find the right word. It was the first time he had spoken her name with any sense of tenderness rather than a sneer, and she quite liked the way it rolled between his lips.
“Wonderful,” she finished for him, and squeezed his hand. She wondered if he was going to try and initiate another intimate embrace. It would not have been unwelcome. “I hope ye know now that I am yer wife in every way that matters, and that means ye can trust me. I dinnae know what more I can dae or say tae convince ye otherwise, Ryan. If ye still view me with suspicion, then I’m nae sure that anything is ever gaeing tae change.”
“Perhaps ye are right,” he admitted, circling the back of her hand with his thumb. He brought it to his lips and kissed it. “I will tell ye what ye want tae know later, but first I hae meetings tae attend. Gae and see yer sisters. Tell them… that things will nae be difficult for them. I will nae seek tae punish them any longer.”
While Caroline would have loved for him to share the truth there and then, she supposed that it was good enough to receive it later. She breasted with relief at his promise, and was certain that the news would be received well by Nessa and Tara. For the first time since she had arrived in this infernal Keep, she felt hope for the future.
Ryan let go of her hand and slipped out of bed. She allowed herself the indulgence of gazing at his naked body as he pulled on his clothes, etching the image of him on her mind. It stirred so many wonderful feelings.
He bent down and picked up her dress, a bashful look on his face as he handed it to her. She thanked him and held it against her body. He towered above her as he studied her, almost as though he were still trying to make sense of her. Caroline reached out and took his hand.
“Find me later. I think we will both benefit from spending more time taegether. This marriage can be important,” she suggested.
Ryan nodded firmly. He bent down and wrapped his hand around the nape of her neck, drawing her into a brief, but deep, kiss. The pressure of his lips lingered as she sank back into the bed, reeling from the feelings he inspired within her, wondering what kind of woman she was to have all of her insides churning like molten lava.
In time, she pulled the dress over her head and smoothed down her hair. She composed herself and left the room to deliver the good news to Nessa and Tara. She arrived at their chamber and knocked lightly on the door, entering immediately. Nessa and Tara were sitting on the bed, deep in conversation. They turned towards Caroline, who smiled warmly.
“What’s happened?” Nessa asked immediately.
Both of the girls wore suspicious looks on their faces.
“There’s something different about ye,” Tara observed.
Caroline’s cheeks flushed a deep red. She drew her hands towards her and averted her gaze.
“I dinnae know what ye mean. Naething is different. Naething at all. I would tell ye if it was. Honestly. I think ye tae hae been in this room for tae long. Ye are starting tae imagine things,” she babbled, moving to the window and turning her back to them.
Tara unfolded her legs and came rushing up to her. She grabbed Caroline’s arms, turning her so that they were facing each other. Tara studied her eyes and then yelped.
“It happened! Ye were right, Nessa, she did lay with him!” Tara cried out.
Nessa rolled her eyes and shook her head. Caroline tore her arm away.
“Ye dinnae know what ye are talking about,” Caroline snapped.
“I dae. I hae read enough books tae recognize the glow when I see it,” Tara said defensively. She may have been young, but she was an insightful woman, much to Caroline’s detriment in this instance.
“How could ye debase yerself like this? I told ye that I dinnae want ye tae make any sacrifices. I just hope that this is nae what ye meant when ye said that whatever fate awaits us, we shall meet taegether,” Nessa shuddered.
Caroline glared at her. Tara’s question was more flighty.
“What was it like?” she asked in a hushed whisper.
Caroline couldn’t help a smile curl upon her lips. She dispelled it almost immediately, but Tara had seen enough. She giggled and clapped her hands together.
“Ye lay with the enemy,” Nessa said darkly.
“Give it over, Nessa. She’s his wife, what is she supposed tae dae?” Tara defended her.
“It’s nae just about that either. He knows things about our clan, or at least he claims tae. I need tae win his trust and I thought this was the most direct way.”
“Oh, sae it was all a ploy.” Nessa’s eyebrows arched. “I’m impressed, I dinnae think ye hae it in ye, sister.”
“Wait, ye lay with him without meaning it?” Tara asked, who seemed as disappointed as Nessa was impressed. Caroline sighed and tugged at her hair.
“It was nae all a ploy. The truth is that the more I get tae know Ryan, the more I see his positive qualities. He is nae the monster we thought he was at first. I am nae even sure he is truly our enemy.”
“Caroline, he kept us here against our will. He forced ye tae marry him. He is just as bad as our uncle. Ye ran away from him, but ye run tae Ryan. It dinnae makes sense,” Nessa claimed.
“It’s nae like that. He’s nae like that. Hae ye seen the way people look at him? They respect him and trust him. Hae ye ever seen anyone look at uncle like that? Anyone apart from Ken, anyway?” Caroline pointed out.
Both Nessa and Tara shuddered at the mention of their cousin.
“I dinnae think ye would defend him. It seems that as ye take his name and his bed, ye take his side as well. Are ye even our sister anymore?” Nessa’s tone was bitter.
Caroline had never expected this sharp reaction. She rushed towards Nessa and took her hand.
“Of course I am. I always hae been, and I always will be. Naething is ever gaeing tae change that. I came here tae tell ye that Ryan is nae gaeing tae punish ye tae get at me. Things are gaeing tae get better, Nessa. Once we deal with the clan, then I can convince him that ye deserve tae be free and ye can dae whatever ye want. I will make good on my promise,” Caroline declared.
Nessa grimaced, clearly not willing to accept Caroline’s word just yet. Tara’s eyes were bright, however.
“This is wonderful. And it means that uncle Gorram cannae get his hands on ye. Ye are truly married now, and it cannae be disputed.”
Caroline hadn’t thought of this, and it came with some measure of relief. However, they were interrupted by a heavy knock at the door, and a bullish guard telling them that the Laird wanted to address them. Caroline nodded towards them, silently warning them, mainly Nessa, to be on their best behavior. This was the moment when they were going to learn the truth about their father’s death.
Caroline’s head was swimming because she didn’t know what she wanted to happen. For as much as she hated her uncle, killing his brother was an evil that went beyond anything she thought he was capable of doing. But if so, then a dark cloud had swallowed up her clan and the Gilmour people were suffering. She might have been a Knox by name, but she felt a need to free them from this evil, and this accursed Laird who had taken the clan by nefarious means.
Caroline, Nessa, and Tara walked through the Keep to the Great Hall, where Ryan was waiting for them.
When Caroline entered the hall, she could feel that something was wrong. There was a coldness to the air that made a chill run down her spine. Ryan was slumped in his high seat, a frustrated and pensive look upon his face. His elbow rested on the arm of the seat, while his fist was clenched and pressed against his chin. His eyes were dark, and the look he exchanged with Caroline had no air of mystery about it.
He was worried.
The three women approached him, and he adjusted his position, sitting forward and clasping his hands between his legs. It was a far cry from the way he had acted in their previous meetings, where he prowled like a wolf, ready to attack them at a moment’s notice. There was less of a savage nature in his eyes now, and more concern.
When Caroline looked at him, her first thought was not that this was her captor, nor was her first feeling a flinching fear. Instead, she knew this man to be her husband, and he was becoming associated with warmer feelings, feelings that invited her closer to him. However, the nature of their conversation prevented her from truly embracing these feelings for the time being.
“I hae grave news. I received a missive this morning. It’s from yer uncle. He knows where ye are, and he hae asked for yer return,” Ryan announced bitterly.
The girls gasped. Nessa and Tara turned to each other with frantic looks in their eyes, while Caroline felt the strength slipping away from her, but she never turned away from Ryan.
“Are ye gaeing tae give us up?” Nessa asked.
“Nae,” Ryan replied immediately. “Ye are under my protection, and I am certainly nae gaeing tae surrender my wife.”
Caroline’s heart skipped a beat when she heard him speak about her with such determination and strength. The ring she wore to symbolize their marriage felt less like a shackle now and more like a gentle reminder of the power that came with love.
“He will nae take nae for an answer. He will stop at naething tae get what he wants. This is only gaeing tae end one way, Ryan,” Caroline added.
Ryan sighed. “I know, but the truth is this hae been inevitable. I suppose it’s my fault for wanting a war,” he confessed with a rueful smile. “But ye should remain in the Keep. My guards will protect ye. These walls have stood for hundreds of years without being breached, and I hae nae plans for that tae change.”
“Where are ye gaeing? Ye are nae gaeing tae meet him directly, are ye? Uncle is a cunning man, and he would surely anticipate anything ye might dae. Ye would be walking intae a trap,” Caroline warned, her voice rising and falling with worry.
Ryan smirked at her. “Dinnae fret, lass, I am nae sae foolish as that. I need tae ride tae the MacLeod Clan and speak tae the laird directly. I will also send yer uncle a notice of our marriage, and this may buy us some time.”
Caroline believed it would only anger him further. More concerning was Ryan’s desire to visit Laird MacLeod.
“Laird MacLeod is nae inclined tae help ye. I read the letter. I know he dinnae want tae get involved in a conflict. What makes ye think he will listen tae ye?”
“I dinnae know, but I hae tae try. Yer uncle cannae be allowed tae get away with this. I will implore Laird MacLeod tae help. My words may come across as more convincing in person,” Ryan explained.
But Caroline knew Laird MacLeod. He was not the kind of man to change his mind unless he was given good reason to do so, and he wanted to protect his people above all else. She wasn’t certain he would risk them in this conflict.
“Let me accompany ye.”
“That is out of the question,” Ryan replied.
Caroline stepped forward, her eyes flashing with an intense stare. “Dae ye think yer guards can protect me better than ye can? Hae ye suddenly lost faith in yerself?” she challenged, hoping that by insulting his pride, she might goad him into doing as she asked.
Ryan bristled at her words. “I am nae gaeing tae be swayed by yer tricks. The matter is nae about me or my guards, it’s about the environment. These walls are safer for ye than the open air.” He gestured about with his hands.
“But ye stand a much better chance of convincing Laird MacLeod with me at yer side. I know him. He will listen tae me. Our voices in unison might be able tae sway him. We certainly stand a much better chance taegether than ye gaeing alone. He can hear from my own lips that I became yer wife willingly, lest he think that ye stole me and my uncle hae a righteous cause in storming yer Keep tae rescue me,” Caroline stated.
Ryan frowned. If he was trying to gain Laird MacLeod as an ally, then perhaps Gorram was as well. He could well be telling the Laird that Ryan had kidnapped Caroline, Nessa, and Tara, and was holding them prisoner. It might have been more believable to Laird MacLeod than the conspiracy of a poisonous scheme to kill Caroline’s father.
Caroline watched as thoughts turned in Ryan’s mind, as he weighed the pros and cons of taking her with him. Eventually, he curled his hand into a fist and thumped it against the arm of the seat.
“Very well, but stay close tae me. I dinnae trust the shadows, and I dinnae trust yer uncle,” Ryan said.
Caroline smiled. It was going to be an easy request to follow, as she wanted nothing more than to stay close to him. Beside her, Tara whimpered and Nessa was shaking her head with warning. Caroline gave them an emphatic look that suggested she was going to be safe, and that this was the best course of action for them all.
Her heart swelled with pride that she would be able to have a direct hand in the outcome of these matters. And she was pleased that Ryan was doing her the courtesy of treating her like an equal rather than a captive. Her eyes shone with adoration as she watched Ryan rising from his throne, ready to embark on this perilous journey.