Chapter 8 #2
“Mr. Gardiner —Mr. Bennet’s brother —called on me. He asked me for any details that might help them discover the couple. I confess I helped them. We…they barely convinced Wickham to accomplish his duty and only after they paid his debts. He is a horrible man, dearest. You must not suffer for him.”
Darcy caressed the girl’s hair, embracing her. He kissed her temples while she whispered, “I do not suffer for him, William, but for my own foolishness. I was so close to being in that girl’s place. When I remember all the pain I caused you…”
“Georgiana, please remember that nothing pains me if I know you are well. You are the most important person in the world to me. Please do not forget that, my dear. You must promise me.”
“I promise…”
Several moments of silence followed while the siblings embraced and the countess enjoyed her port, elegantly bringing a handkerchief to her eyes.
“So, this is what you were doing in that part of town? Visiting Miss Bennet’s family?” Georgiana asked.
“Yes.”
“I see…William, there is something else I must share with you. When Miss Lizzy told us about the elopement, she was so devastated and frightened for her sister that I tried to calm her, so I confessed to her that I was once close to eloping myself. I did not mention George Wickham’s name either, but I wanted her to know that I understood her sorrow.
I hope you will not be upset with me,” Georgiana spoke hesitantly.
Darcy could not conceal his bewilderment.
“That is quite a surprise. I would not expect you to share a secret with someone you barely knew —a secret you insisted on keeping private even from the closest family. But since that is what you decided, I have no reason or right to be upset. Besides, I am quite confident that we should not fear Miss Bennet’s discretion. ”
He saw that his sister was surprised by his calm reaction.
Considering his offensive statements towards Elizabeth, Georgiana expected him to be furious about her confession.
Of course, she would never know that he was the first to confess that dark, painful secret to Elizabeth in a letter she refused to read.
When Darcy looked at it from Georgiana’s point of view, the entire situation with Elizabeth looked completely different.
The two of them had grown unexpectedly close and had found the strength to trust and confess to each other their most painful secrets.
Georgiana felt that Elizabeth liked her for herself —not for being a Darcy —and he knew only too well what she meant.
He also knew how completely right Georgiana was: Elizabeth liked her precisely because she was unaware of her identity.
His suspicions were not just wrong but quite ridiculous.
His uneasiness increased as he scolded himself for his faulty actions and words.
All his fury, resentment, and reproaches seemed unjustified and simply malicious when he spoke of Elizabeth in her absence.
He only tried to point out her wrongs and to compensate for his still-powerful attraction towards her.
And Georgiana’s question remained unanswered: How could he object to his sister’s befriending Elizabeth Bennet —unless he was afraid of falling under her spell again?
He had saddened his sister for only one reason: his own weakness and lack of control.
He looked at Georgiana’s distressed expression once again then gently caressed her hair.
“My dear, if everything I told you has not changed your mind, you may write a short letter to Miss Bennet. Since I must speak to Mr. Bennet tonight, I will deliver it to her.”
Surprise brightened Georgiana’s face; she stared at her brother in disbelief, then embraced him in haste, and hurried to the desk in search of pen and paper.
Darcy felt his aunt’s insistent gaze upon him, but neither of them spoke.
Two hours later, Darcy’s carriage was traveling back to Gracechurch Street.
In his right pocket, he carried a piece of paper bearing Georgiana’s elegant writing —the second time he would give Elizabeth a letter to clarify a distressing misunderstanding.
And while he counted the minutes until he would see her, he wondered what he could say to explain this latest example of his ungentlemanlike behaviour before they separated forever.
Elizabeth struggled to maintain a calm appearance in the presence of her relatives.
She briefly informed her father, uncle, and aunt of the astonishing coincidence that her new acquaintance was Mr. Darcy’s sister.
She felt uncomfortable speaking of it, but she had to make certain that, if Mr. Darcy returned to hold her responsible for some imagined fault, her relatives would not be taken by surprise.
Mr. Bennet declared that he was expecting Mr. Darcy and began to worry about whether the gentleman would return.
For Elizabeth, every moment increased her turmoil. She was desperate to discover the reason Miss Darcy kept her identity secret and travelled halfway across town to spend time in a small, unfashionable park. What did she tell her brother that made him so astonished and angry on seeing them?
As for the gentleman in question, Elizabeth was intrigued, offended, and equally angry.
He had been impolite, rude, and unjust, and she felt incapable of reproaching him for anything directly since they were so much in his debt.
Her only relief was the knowledge that each of them would leave for separate destinations the next day and put the entire matter behind them.
In the evening, when Mr. Bennet and Mr. Gardiner were at the edge of their patience and trying to decide whether they should go to Mr. Darcy themselves, the gentleman finally arrived.
He apologised for the delay, offered a brief explanation while he handed the papers to his hosts, and cast a glance towards Elizabeth. Both turned slightly pale then coloured, avoiding looking at each other for more than an instant.
Relieved, both elder gentlemen hurried to invite Mr. Darcy for a drink while Mrs. Gardiner extended an invitation for dinner.
Darcy accepted the drink, thanked Mrs. Gardiner, and expressed his hope that another opportunity for dinner might arise in the future; then —to everyone’s puzzlement —he asked permission for a private conversation with Elizabeth.
“I have a message from my sister —for Miss Bennet —and I would rather deliver it personally if there is no inconvenience for you.”
The others glanced at each other, Elizabeth blushed slightly, and then Mr. Bennet answered, “Of course, sir.”
“Would the drawing room be acceptable?” Mrs. Gardiner inquired, and at Darcy’s approving nod, she invited them in and closed the door behind them.
Silence fell heavily upon them both. Since Elizabeth’s anguished visit to Darcy House, this was the first time they were alone —the first time that they were forced to look at each other or to speak to each other.
Elizabeth unconsciously straightened her shoulders and clenched her fists to gain her courage, expecting a confrontation.
“Miss Bennet, I believe you know the subject of this private conversation,” he began.
“I imagine you wish to talk about my acquaintance with Miss Anna… forgive me…Miss Darcy. It is obvious and understandable that you are displeased with the situation. But I cannot accept your implied accusations that—”
“I am displeased as well as shocked,” he interrupted her. “I never imagined you might be the ‘Miss Lizzy’ my sister spoke of. Georgiana is a very private person, and she has few friends outside the family.”
“And Mr. Bingley’s sisters, I imagine.” The moment she spoke, Elizabeth regretted her reply.
“Miss Bennet, this is not a time for trifling and certainly not at my sister’s expense.”
“Sir, I apologise, that was not my intention. I was only trying to…it does not even matter. You seem determined to misunderstand everything I say.”
“I did misunderstand both your words and your behaviour in the past, but I trust I ceased doing that four months ago.”
“Quite the contrary, sir. You are not —”
“This discussion is not about me or you but about Georgiana. My sister’s well-being and happiness are all that matter to me.
I know she grew quite fond of you, and my aunt gave you her address —which is also astonishing.
They planned to even have a correspondence with you!
I must know what your intentions are as it is my duty to protect them both. ”
“What do you suspect my intentions are, sir? You instantly accused me of mischievous schemes, so your opinion must be already fixed.”
“I admit that, under the astonishment of the discovery, I thought you intentionally approached my sister because you feared you might not convince me to assist your family in discovering your sister and attempted to gain some advantage through Georgiana. I was confident that you had discovered her hidden identity while concealing your own or you had convinced her to keep your relationship hidden from me —that you betrayed her genuine friendship for ulterior motives.”
Darcy stopped and stared at her, cold and severe.
Elizabeth replied, hoping her voice expressed ample determination. “Sir, I cannot accept such an unfair accusation. You must allow me to tell you the truth, which is far from what you imagine. I must speak my mind.”
“That will not be necessary, Miss Bennet. I fought against my first impression, and I talked to my sister and my aunt, so I already know the entire truth. She told me about your confession to her regarding the elopement and hers to you. I do not approve of it, but I cannot hold it against you. I understand that you were a comforting companion to my sister when she needed it, so I am here to admit my wrongs to you and to apologise for my manners when we met in the park. I know only too well how it feels to bear unfair accusations without being given a chance to defend oneself.”