Chapter 27 #3
“My dear, you can be at no loss as to what I am referring. We face a situation that makes all of us miserable. I admit it chiefly affects you and my nephew, but it also pains Georgiana just when she has found some peace. Not to mention that it annoys me exceedingly.”
“I am aware of that, and I cannot say how much I regret it; it is entirely my fault, and I am ready to do anything to remedy it.”
“Oh, enough with this fault and to whom it belongs! Both you and Darcy accept the blame but neither of you takes proper action, and the situation only worsens. Of course, my nephew is more proficient at this than you are: you take no action while he takes the wrong ones.”
Elizabeth blushed with embarrassment. “I do not know how to respond to this...”
“I spoke to Darcy before he left. I am the nearest relation he and Georgiana have in the world and am entitled to know all his dearest concerns. Of course, you might say I am not entitled to know yours; still, I hope you will be as honest with me as you would be with your own mother or aunt so this can be resolved in the happiest possible way.”
“Of that, you should not doubt. Is there something your ladyship wishes me to do?”
“Well, that you must decide for yourself. My nephew’s departure is certainly related to you —there is no debate there.
And it is obvious that his absence troubles you more than his presence did, just as I am certain he is more distressed being away than he was being here.
I cannot question his intentions, so I must question yours. Is there something you intend to do?”
Her amazement grew, and she could hardly find words.
“I do not know what I should do…what I could do…”
“Elizabeth, you must know that my sincerity and frankness are greater than my diplomacy. Be warned that I may ask questions you might choose not to answer, but I will insist nevertheless.”
“I will answer any of your questions. After everything that has happened in the last few days, there are no secrets left.”
“Very well. I know you refused Darcy last April, and I find it admirable that a woman has the strength to reject a man she does not consider worthy; although, I dare say in this particular case, it was rather a silly decision,” Lady Hardwick said, half in jest. She sipped some tea and continued.
“I can well imagine the two of you —both quick tempered, hasty in judgement, proud, and prejudiced —having an argument and heating it until it burned you both. But the past is gone. Please tell me: What are your feelings towards my nephew at present?”
Elizabeth’s astonishment at such a direct question matched her turmoil in groping for a precise answer. How could she put into words something she did not understand?
“I was indeed hasty and prejudiced in judging Mr. Darcy in the past. But my opinion of him has changed completely; I —”
“My dear, I am not asking about your opinion of him but about your feelings —about how you breathe when you are in his presence, how your heart beats when he is near you, what you sense when he touches your hand. Compare all these things with your feelings in similar situations —with other gentlemen like my nephew Lord Mowbray or Colonel Fitzwilliam —and tell me. Is the answer so difficult?”
Elizabeth stared at the countess, blinking rapidly to stem her tears, recollections spinning in her mind and shaking her.
“No…the answer is not difficult,” she murmured, her voice barely audible in her distress.
“Oh, my dear, it gives me great hope to see you so troubled,” the countess said with a smile. “But I confess I hardly needed your admission. I have long noticed the sparks between you, although I was not certain of their cause.”
“Have you?” Elizabeth replied incredulously.
“Of course, I have —even before we started our journey to Pemberley. But I confess I was rather worried, as I believed it to be the mutual attraction of a gentleman and a young lady. I have seen such situations before, and I feared it might become improper and harmful for your reputation, which could also affect Georgiana. I said nothing because, once we arrived at Pemberley, I did not see either of you attempt to place yourself in private situations. You were always with Georgiana, and Darcy rather avoided your company. Of course, I could not imagine the story behind these observations.”
“Oh…I did not know…I was hardly aware myself…I was so confused and…”
“Yes, I can easily guess your confusion, my dear. But now you should decide what you wish then gather your thoughts and strength and find the best way to achieve your desire.”
“Lady Hardwick, I must ask: Why are you so kind and generous to me? Why are you preoccupied with my happiness? Most people in your position would condemn any possible connection between me and Mr. Darcy.”
A grin twisted the countess’s lips.
“Elizabeth, I assure you that I am by no means as generous as you believe me to be. Quite the contrary —I am preoccupied with your happiness because I strongly believe it is closely related to the happiness of my nephew and niece. I confess I first admired you for all the traits that make you distinct from other young women your age. Then I appreciated your extraordinary influence on Georgiana and your genuine affection for her. I also considered for some time that you would be very well suited for the position of Darcy’s wife, but I had little hope that it might happen.
But since I have discovered the truth, the solution for everyone’s felicity seems clear to me. ”
She drank some more tea, watching Elizabeth closely.
“I shall not deny that wealth and connections are important; being born into a family of peers, I would be a hypocrite to claim otherwise. But reaching my age, I have realised that there are few things that truly matter in life. One is the way you use your fortune and your power: the help you provide to those in need and the legacy you leave. The other is the love you share with your family and friends, but most importantly with that one person who makes you complete and enriches your life —if you have the good fortune ever to find that person —the person who is your spouse, your confidant, your lover. The person who, when you hold him in your arms, you feel as if you are holding the entire world and nothing else matters.”
As she spoke, the countess’s eyes brightened while her face coloured. Her voice became animated, and her smile widened, enhancing her delicate, beautiful features.
“This is what I want for my nephew, Elizabeth. And I am confident that, once he experiences all these things, he will help Georgiana to obtain them too.”
Elizabeth listened and watched completely mesmerised, each word stirring her mind and melting her heart.
“And I believe you, Miss Elizabeth Bennet, can be that person to Darcy. But that may happen only if his holding your hand makes you feel as you never have before with any other man…”
“I am…he is…I never…if I could only…” she whispered, overwhelmed by the strength of what she suddenly understood. Tearful, she rubbed her hands as she struggled to speak.
“Mr. Darcy is truly the best man I have known. It is true that his behaviour was wrong and his manners unacceptable, but I did reject his marriage proposal, and I offended him in the worst possible manner. I am not certain what his feelings are now. But I know that no man would ever forget or forgive my offenses. No man would propose again after such a disappointment. And no man would connect himself to a family where, to every other objection, would now be added an alliance and relationship of the nearest kind with Mr. Wickham, the man whom he so justly despises.”
To Elizabeth’s turmoil, Lady Hardwick answered with another grin.
“Indeed, I am amazed at how well you know without a doubt what a man —any man! —would do and not do. And you pretend that my nephew is arrogant?” she mocked a distressed Elizabeth.
“Even you must admit that, had my nephew been indifferent to you, he would not still be so troubled by your presence, nor would he have kissed you under the bridge, or left his sister and his home before Christmas, simply because your nearness was too painful for him to bear.”
“I would have left in his place. I did not want him to separate from his family. If only we could find a way…if I could explain to him…but what to tell him? How could I dare speak my mind? How could I even approach such a subject with him?”
“Dear Elizabeth —when Mist ran and climbed that tree, you found an instant and efficient solution to bring him back when we all panicked and suffered for him.”
Elizabeth was disconcerted and puzzled by such a comparison, wondering whether the lady was mocking her.
“Surely, the situations are not the same. I could not —”
“I beg to differ. Just like Georgiana in the park, you are in danger of losing something rare and precious. You may either cry and pine for it, or climb the tree and bring him back.”
Elizabeth’s astonishment left her speechless while the countess discreetly poured herself a little port to calm her nerves.
“You should go to Georgiana now,” Lady Hardwick said. “I have something to finish, and I will join you soon.”
Elizabeth walked away, abashed and silent; from the doorway, she turned and said, attempting a weak excuse.
“Lady Hardwick, Georgiana misinterpreted what she saw. Mr. Darcy did not kiss me under the bridge…”
“Well, my dear, then you had better do something to remedy that!”
Once Elizabeth left, Lady Hardwick filled her glass again and started to laugh. Then she sat at the small desk, took paper and pen, and wrote:
Darcy,
You are expected home without delay. Miss Bennet and Georgiana agree with me that your absence is most disturbing. As for Lord Mowbray, I shall write to him myself. Neither Miss Bennet nor I feel that he should make the long journey to Pemberley in this bad weather.
Do not bother to send an answer to this letter. You are expected to deliver it personally before Christmas.
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