Chapter Seven #2
She snorted as she slowly removed her bonnet.
“I always adore gifts from you, and they’ve certainly stopped in recent months.
” The delicate tendons of her throat worked with a hard swallow.
“It might be my imagination, but you have pulled away from me since last October, Gabriel, and I don’t know why.
How do you think that makes me feel?” When he didn’t immediately answer, she continued.
“While you are out solving cases and spending time with your friends at the club or elsewhere, I am inside the house. Day in and day out, I am kept in a gilded prison, presiding over a household and a family that I adore and would do anything for, and no one seems to realize that I am slowly fading away.” Her voice broke.
“Forgetting who I was when we first met.”
Oh, God.
She shook her head. “Why haven’t you asked me to assist on any of your cases since last October?”
There were no words floating about his head. “I didn’t think you wanted to do that since they weren’t exciting.”
“That matters not, for we would have been together, like we were when we met.”
What an idiot I’ve been. “Mary, I…” He shook his head. What a nodcock he was. They were both in danger of destroying a beautiful romance because of fear. “I didn’t know…”
“Because you are so wrapped up in your own damned life that you haven’t noticed me for a long time!”
“And I’ve apologized for that.” The heated anger was back in his chest, and he needed to lash out to relieve it. “Is that why you’ve returned to what’s familiar, gone back to Francis? Are you and he lovers?” Shit, that wasn’t well done of him at all, but he couldn’t recall the stupid words.
Her lips formed an “O” of shock while that same anger darkened her eyes to deep sapphire. “How dare you.” With an utterance of rage, Mary threw her bonnet at him.
It hit him in the chest, for he didn’t try to prevent it; he deserved her ire, and the bonnet fell to the ground. The vulnerability ran deep, and it made him hate himself. “Well?”
She stamped one of her feet and popped her hands on her hips. “Why the devil would you ever say that to me? I married you, spoke vows to you, have a family with you—”
“One that apparently makes you feel as if you’re in prison,” he couldn’t resist interrupting.
“As if you aren’t trying to escape from it in your own way,” she hissed back. Tears made her eyes luminous, magnified the emotions there.
The accusation shredded him to his soul. “I’m losing you, Mary, if not to Francis, then to some mystery man that you’re thrilled is sending you flowers.”
A tear fell to her cheek, and he wanted nothing more than to bundle her into his arms and beg her forgiveness. Again. “That isn’t truth, but if it was, can you blame me?” When she met his gaze, another crystalline drop fell. “It would have meant so much, that little gesture.”
An ache set up around his heart. “Have I not shown you that I still care? Everything I do is because of you and our children.”
She sniffled. “Of course you have, but it’s still nice to be told that, shown that.
” A look of revelation settled across her face.
“That’s it, or at least one of the reasons I’m out of sorts.
I feel unappreciated. I feel as if I’m expected to do things, to take up responsibilities, while you’re out of pocket, away from being fully domesticated. ”
It was his turn to feel the shock that plowed into him.
“I have been feeling the same from you. No longer do you thank me for the work I do, for how I’m working to keep you and the children safe.
” He wanted to rage at the heavens, but what good would that do?
“We are both at fault, I know this, but are we so broken we can’t heal? ”
“I don’t know.” The silence that brewed between them went deep and stretched for miles. “I don’t know how to fix what’s broken or if it can be fixed.”
“Ah.” Did that mean she didn’t care any longer?
Were they trapped in a marriage where the foundations had crumbled?
Why can’t I put this to rights? Even he knew it would take more than charming grins and heated kisses to bring her back.
“Let me take you to the house,” he said as he retrieved her bonnet and held it out to her.
“Fine.” Mary wrenched the head gear from his hand.
“Though I’m glad we spoke our minds just now, that doesn’t mean my annoyance with you has suddenly evaporated.
You embarrassed me today, and I’ll need to think over everything you’ve told me.
” As soon as she took up the basket of flowers, she turned her back and started out of the maze’s heart.
“I understand that, and I feel the same.” Quickly snagging his top hat, Gabriel followed her. “Will you come down for dinner?”
“Not tonight. I’m exhausted and will have a tray sent up.”
“What should I tell Francis and Vivian?”
“Tell them whatever the deuce you want. I’m sure you can find some creative excuse.”
He narrowed his eyes. “I never knew you had a temper.”
“I didn’t until I was mistreated by my first husband.
Perhaps it had just gone dormant until now.
” Silence reigned between them as they cleared the maze.
On the lawn, she spoke again. “It would be best if you would find somewhere else to sleep tonight, Inspector.” She only called him by his title when she was well and truly put out with him.
“Why?” That second shock caused him to miss a step. Once he recovered, he added, “We’ve never slept apart, regardless of disagreements before now.”
“There is a first time for everything.” Her jaw was set hard with her chin at a stubborn position.
Fury shot from her eyes, and twin spots of color blazed on her cheeks.
“If you wish to act like an arse, you can sleep in the stable for all I care.” The trembling of her chin belied that statement.
“You’ve deeply hurt me tonight, and I don’t take that lightly. ”
“As if your words didn’t sting me?” All his fears were coming true, and as he remembered how his first marriage came apart, that cold terror lodged in his chest. Would he lose her as well?
When she didn’t answer, he strove to hide those emotions, for he couldn’t afford the vulnerability.
“I’ll make camp in the private parlor, pretend I’ve fallen asleep reading.
The last thing we need is gossip.” But he was slowly dying inside.
What will happen now?
Mary nodded. “Make certain to bring a blanket with you. The nights are still chilly, especially out in the country.”
It was a small victory to know she still cared, and he tucked that away to nurture when they’d both calmed after the anger and hurt feelings faded. “Thank you for the reminder.”
“And make sure you eat, Bright. You don’t usually feel hungry when you’re bothered by something.”
He grinned. “I will.” Whether she wanted him to or not, he would continue to look after her, and once she’d fallen asleep, he would tuck her in, kiss her forehead, and damn it all, he intended to fight for her.
There was nothing in life as important as her to him.