Chapter 23
By the time the cock crowed to announce the rising sun, Elizabeth’s letter from Darcy had been stained with tears and had begun to tear along the creases of the folds. Having remained awake all night to read and reread the missive time and again, Elizabeth was almost drunk from lack of sleep.
How differently did everything now appear in which Darcy was concerned! His questions about Polly appearing in public, his comments to Bingley about Jane being an appropriate match… it was all done with his sister in mind.
She grew absolutely ashamed of herself. “How despicably have I acted!” she cried aloud to the empty room. “I, who have prided myself on my discernment! I, who have valued myself for my abilities! How humiliating is this discovery—yet, how just a humiliation! Til this moment, I never knew myself.”
Elizabeth’s self-recriminations lasted for several days. The biggest contributing factor to the lengthy duration of her self-castigation was the fact that she had very little to occupy her time.
Louisa was actively employed in helping her husband recuperate from his injuries. While he was physically healing tolerably well, his mental state left much to be desired. He was determined to cease imbibing, and the resulting withdrawals were affecting his emotional well-being more than was originally anticipated. As his injuries prevented him from distracting himself with riding, hunting, fishing, or other similar pursuits, it was up to Louisa to ensure that Mr. Hurst’s mind was kept agreeably engaged.
Jane and Bingley—or Charles, as Elizabeth was continually reminded to call him—were completely absorbed in their own world. Elizabeth felt quite redundant at Netherfield now that Jane had a husband to care for her. She never realized how much time was spent tending to Jane’s needs until it was no longer required of her.
After a week of reading the same books and walking the same paths, Elizabeth could no longer bear the solitude. It left too much time for rumination and self-reflection. While she was certain she deserved every moment of her self-castigation, she knew that if she wallowed in her remorse for too long, others would notice and question it.
It was with this in mind that Elizabeth set forth to Meryton, intent on distracting herself with news from friends and family. She was not formed for ill-humor, and the brisk walk in the unusually warm weather did much to soothe her wounded spirits.
As she reached the edge of the village, her steps felt lighter with anticipation of the day’s encounters. The town, always a hive of activity, seemed particularly lively, echoing with the mingled sounds of commerce and conversation.
The town square was abuzz with the chatter of townsfolk and the occasional clatter of carriage wheels over cobblestones. A group of children played a spirited game near the fountain, their laughter ringing clear and joyful, while their mothers exchanged news and gossip nearby, their voices a comfortable murmur in the background.
Elizabeth’s attention was then drawn to a small crowd gathered around a stall, where a traveling merchant was animatedly showcasing his wares. Curious, she edged closer, intrigued by the exotic spices and fabrics that promised tales of distant lands.
Just as Elizabeth was about to engage the merchant further, a familiar voice called out her name. She turned and spotted Kitty and Lydia standing with a group of soldiers, eagerly waving at her, beckoning her to join them.
“What a good joke!” Lydia laughed. “We were just telling Denny and Wickham here that we haven’t seen you in an age, and here you are!”
“Almost as if by magic,” Elizabeth replied, a twinkle in her eye, which faded quickly when she realized how close her sisters were standing to the soldiers.
Elizabeth’s brief frown caused Kitty to blush and untangle her arm from her escort, but Lydia pretended not to notice her sister’s disapproval. She tossed her head and pressed her form closer to Wickham’s arm, who in turn cleared his throat awkwardly.
The uncomfortable moment was interrupted when Mrs. Phillips threw open her parlor window from across the street. “Girls! Do come inside, and bring the officers with you!”
Elizabeth’s face flushed at her aunt’s poor manners, but fortunately the officers were too eager for a decent meal and good company to say anything disparaging. As a group, they all crossed the street and, after entering the house, went to the parlor.
Once inside, Elizabeth was somewhat surprised to see that Major Wickham had abandoned Lydia’s company in favor of her own. He took a seat near her and, after inquiring after her health, offered his congratulations on Jane’s marriage.
“Thank you. They are doing quite well, and it is clear they are extremely happy together.”
“I understand my old friend Darcy stood up with Mr. Bingley at the wedding.”
Elizabeth tensed. While she now knew of the truth between old Mr. Darcy and Mr. Wickham, she did not feel comfortable sharing those details with the major. After all, it would be difficult to explain how she had come to such intimate knowledge of their affairs.
“Yes, he did. I believe they are good friends,” she said cautiously.
“Mr. Bingley is quite fortunate, then. Darcy is a good man.”
Shocked, Elizabeth’s eyebrows flew up on her forehead. Wickham smiled ruefully. “I do not blame your surprise, Miss Bennet, at my making such a statement, especially given the tale I related to you when last we spoke.”
“Why, yes, I must admit to a certain amount of astonishment.”
“Three days ago, I received a visit from Darcy’s man of business. He came with a letter for me from Darcy, which explained everything that happened all those years ago. It’s rather private, else I would share it with you, but suffice it to say that I was completely wrong about everything. I had thought that Darcy… Well, you know what I thought. It turns out that Darcy actually fought for me until his father threatened… well…”
His voice trailed off, and Elizabeth hastened to reassure him that he need not say any more. “I completely understand the need for privacy, sir. You are under no obligation to reveal additional information that belongs between two gentlemen.”
He gave her a grateful smile. “I appreciate your discretion, Miss Bennet.”
“It must feel wonderful to know that your friend never betrayed you, and that he was as faithful to you as you were to him.”
“Oh, yes,” Wickham cried. “Even more so! For Darcy’s man also came with a bank note!”
“Really?” asked Elizabeth, stunned.
“Yes! For Darcy had remembered how his father had promised to pay for schooling and provide a living. When he saw me in uniform, his letter said he realized his father must not have kept that promise. So he sent a bank note worth the value of four years of Cambridge, plus what a preferment would have cost.”
“My word!”
“But please do not tell a soul,” Wickham begged. “I only tell you because I had made Darcy quite the villain to you, and I am determined that you shan’t think ill of him.”
“You may depend upon my silence,” she assured him.
“I knew I might. You didn’t tell anyone about Darcy before, either. With this fortune—and indeed, it is a fortune—I shall finally be able to marry how I choose.”
His eyes darted over to where Lydia and Kitty were sitting on the sofa with their aunt, speaking with some of the other officers. Elizabeth’s eyebrows raised once again, and Wickham gave her a small wink. “Not a word yet, though, eh? I haven’t wished to raise any hopes when I hadn’t the means to take a wife. Now I must do some courting!”
Wickham rose from his chair and went to join the other officers, leaving an astonished Elizabeth near the fireplace to ponder on all the new information she had just received.
∞∞∞
It was with a heavy heart that Elizabeth trudged back to Netherfield. The warm weather she had enjoyed on her way into Meryton seemed to have been blown away with her sunny spirits.
This report from Major Wickham is of no trifling nature. What praise is more valuable than that of a former enemy? And to be able to dispose of a fortune so readily in order to right a wrong that was committed by someone else nearly a decade and a half ago. To have access to that kind of money—what kind of estate must Pemberley be? As a landlord, a master, a brother… so many people’s happiness are in his guardianship! It is in his power to bestow so much pleasure or pain, depending on his temperament. The more I come to learn about Mr. Darcy, the more I see that he truly is the best of men—and I the cruelest of ladies.
She immediately returned to her chambers upon her arrival at Netherfield and once again pulled out Darcy’s letter, which she was in a fair way of knowing by heart. She studied every sentence, and her feelings towards its writer were at times widely different.
When she remembered the style of his address, she was still full of indignation. While her family was not the most well-behaved, they were still her family and she loved them. It was not a stranger’s place to come into her town and immediately begin to judge others without coming to know them.
“Besides, Papa has provided for us,” she muttered to herself. “We wouldn’t need Charles’s money if something were to happen to Papa.”
In all fairness, though, she did have to admit that not even Mama knew the truth about their financial situation, and Kitty and Lydia’s wild behavior was quite repelling.
Still, he didn’t have to be so condescending about her relations. Not when his own father had behaved so abominably towards his own wife and daughter.
The thought of poor Miss Darcy was enough to cause Elizabeth to forgive Darcy of almost everything. He was proud, it was true, but he clearly had a strong sense of duty and in doing that which was right.
Stop this, Elizabeth, before you drive yourself mad!
Unfortunately for her, Elizabeth’s chastisements to herself were not enough to keep her from ruminating over every interaction she’d ever had with Darcy for the next several days. It was only when news of another kind came that she was able to put all thoughts of the tall gentleman from Derbyshire to the side.
∞∞∞
“Engaged? To Mr. Collins?”
Two days after Major Wickham had shared his news about his astonishing windfall from Darcy, Elizabeth sat in the parlor at Netherfield Park and stared in shock at her mother and sister Mary.
“Yes, Mary and Mr. Collins are engaged!” squealed Mrs. Bennet. “I was so afraid that after the whole… situation with you that Mr. Collins would not want anything more to do with our family and we would be tossed into the hedgerows for sure, but he took such a liking to Mary. All her studies of Fordyce’s Sermons and the Bible have been of good use, I dare say. Goodness knows I’ve always encouraged her to…”
Mrs. Bennet rambled on nonsensically about how her advice to Mary had been the determining factor in the engagement, but Elizabeth scarcely listened. Instead, she focused her attention on her next younger sister’s face, trying to gauge how Mary felt about her new relationship status.
“Mama,” Elizabeth said abruptly, interrupting her mother mid-sentence, “perhaps while you are here, you might advise Mrs. Nichols on the best methods for linen rotation. I fear with Jane being newly married and feeling a bit unwell, it is something that will be allowed to go unnoticed.”
Mrs. Bennet blinked owlishly at her daughter; then her face lit up with excitement. “Oh my, of course! It never occurred to me that Jane might need my assistance on such a thing!”
“Well, I am certain that Mrs. Hurst will be able to manage admirably in a few days, but she is still caring for her husband.”
“Of course, of course.”
Elizabeth sent a silent apology to Mrs. Nichols and made a mental note to express her gratitude later. For now, however, she made use of her contrived privacy with her sister.
“Mary, are you sure this is what you want?”
Mary pursed her lips and looked down her nose. “Why should you be surprised, Elizabeth? Do you think it incredible that Mr. Collins should be able to procure any woman’s good opinion because he was not so happy as to succeed with you?”
“No, I—”
“Or perhaps, like Mama, you despaired of me ever attaining the married state?”
“Not at all! I simply—”
“I’ll have you know—”
“Mary!”
Elizabeth’s shout was enough to cause her sister to fall silent, and Elizabeth took advantage of the moment. “Did neither Mama nor Papa tell you what happened when Mr. Collins asked me to marry him? Look!”
She pushed up the sleeve of her dress to reveal the hand-shaped bruises that had not quite faded from her arm. Mary leaned forward and peered through her spectacles to examine the marks before sitting back and saying, “Yes, I am aware of what occurred.”
“And you’re… you’re still willing to marry him?” Elizabeth’s bewilderment was evident.
Mary shrugged. “I see what you are feeling, but when you have had time to think it all over, I think you will understand. Mr. Collins is not much different from Jane; the more time I spend with him, the more I see that he is very easily led. As his wife, I would be in the best position to have the most influence on him. Already he has taken to listening to what I have to say over what Lady Catherine has told him in the past.”
“Lady Catherine?”
“His patroness. He quite venerates her, you know, but that is because she is the first woman to give him any attention. Once I began spending time with him, he was quick to turn his esteem.”
“And you are content with marrying a man such as that?”
“I’m not romantic, Elizabeth,” Mary said plainly. “I never was. I ask only a comfortable home, and considering Mr. Collins’s situation as the future master of Longbourn, as well as the parson in charge of a flock, I believe I can do quite a lot of good as his wife. I am convinced that my chance of happiness with him is much higher than most people can boast on entering the marriage state.”
Elizabeth quietly answered “undoubtedly,” and, after an awkward pause, asked when the wedding date was to be.
“The banns will be called this Sunday, and we will be married the Tuesday following their third calling. Mr. Collins will remain at Longbourn until the wedding, and we will then go immediately to Kent the day after. I felt it best for he and I to spend as much time as possible in one another’s company before he returns to his duties.”
“It sounds as if you have everything arranged to your satisfaction, then.”
Mary smiled. “Indeed I do. I am quite content with how everything has come about.”
“Then I wish you every happiness.”
∞∞∞
The three weeks leading up to Mary’s wedding passed rather slowly for Elizabeth. She spent her mornings on walks, her afternoons with Jane and Louisa, and her evenings with a book while the other occupants of Netherfield played cards. She had often wished for a quieter household when she lived at Longbourn, but now that she was living in one, she found she missed the noise and bustle that came from having five unmarried women all living under one roof.
As the harvest was over and the tenants were accustomed to caring for themselves under the direction of the steward and Mrs. Nichols, there was little for her to do. The cold weather made the long treks to their cottages impossible, in any case, and she was not skilled enough on a horse to make the visit that way.
The day of Mary’s wedding coincided with the Gardiner’s yearly Christmas visit, and the family of six arrived just two days before the ceremony. Bingley and Louisa generously offered Netherfield for the Gardiner’s use during their stay, which was gratefully accepted. Jane was eager to spend the holiday with her family, and Bingley refused to allow her to travel back and forth to Longbourn in the cold weather.
While marriage had certainly done much for Jane’s emotional health, Elizabeth was forced to admit that it was also doing much for her physical well-being as well. The winter was proving to be quite frigid, and there were certainly benefits to being the wife of a wealthy man as opposed to the daughter of a country squire.
The Bennets were by no means impoverished, but Longbourn was an ancestral home and therefore prone to drafty rooms that never seemed warm enough in the winter, no matter how high the flames were stoked. Netherfield, however, was a more modern estate, and Bingley could afford to keep the fires in his wife’s chambers and the parlor burning at such temperatures so as to ease Mrs. Bingley’s coughs.
It was with Jane’s health in mind that Elizabeth volunteered to remain at Netherfield instead of attending Mary’s wedding to Mr. Collins. The ceremony was brief and plain, in accordance with the wishes of the engaged couple. Mrs. Bennet was dismayed at the lack of lace on her daughter’s dress, but Mary held firm in her belief that a clergyman’s wife ought to set an example of modesty and economy.
Thus Mr. Collins left Hertfordshire, his wife at his side, with Elizabeth hardly having seen him since his disastrous attempt at proposing to her. He did offer a very awkward attempt at an apology when he spied her once at church, but Mary quickly ushered him away.
With the couple, not entirely happy but content, having been united in holy matrimony, everyone was able to turn their attention to Christmas the following week. The children, who had taken over the nursery at Netherfield, could be frequently found attempting to pilfer treats from the kitchen or pull pranks on unsuspecting housemaids.
The Bennets came to Netherfield early each morning, only to leave late each night. In spite of this, Mrs. Gardiner was still able to find the time to speak with Elizabeth privately. She was an amiable, intelligent, elegant woman, and a great favorite with her Longbourn nieces, and with Elizabeth especially, there subsisted a very particular regard.
“My dear Lizzy, is everything all right? I must admit to having been concerned about you as of late. Your recent letters seem a bit forlorn.”
Elizabeth sighed. “I’m afraid, Aunt, that I have been quite deceived by myself. There is nothing so uncomfortable as discovering one’s own weaknesses and failings.”
Mrs. Gardiner gave her niece a sympathetic smile. “I fear we all feel that way from time to time. Becoming a mother was quite the eye-opening experience for me, and I rapidly began to notice all of my failures.”
A sigh was the only response. After a few moments, Mrs. Gardiner added, “Perhaps a change of scene is in order. It has been a while since you have been to London. Your uncle and I will be here with the children for another fortnight. Would you like to return with us and stay for the remainder of the season?”
“But what about Jane?”
“London is only a half day’s journey away. I am certain that if anything were to occur, Mr. Bingley could send an express, and you could return immediately.”
Elizabeth bit her lip and looked around the room. Jane was sitting near the fireplace, Bingley at her side. Louisa was on the settee with her husband. The Bennets were scattered throughout the room, mingled with the Gardiner children. She thought back over the endlessly long days at Netherfield, feeling on the outside as the only unmarried person in residence.
At last, she said, “Very well, Aunt. I shall go to London.”