Chapter 22
ARABELLA
I missed the final step of the dance, mumbling a hasty apology to Sir William as I narrowly dodged his toes.
My face grew hot as the music faded and the guests on the outskirts of the room applauded.
How many of them had seen my mistake? Sir William didn’t seem to care at all, giving me a reassuring smile, but all I could think of was the fact that Mr. Campbell was here.
I glanced at the doorway again, but he was no longer there. My heart pounded as I scanned the room. He had certainly seen me dancing, and he had likely witnessed my misstep as well. Would he know that he had been the cause of it?
Sir William led me back to where Kate awaited me near the refreshment table, bowing in departure.
I was proud of myself for maintaining my politeness, even as distracted as I was.
The moment Sir William walked away, I resumed my search for Mr. Campbell.
I spotted him on the opposite side of the room, his back turned to me as he conversed with the Viscount Huntington.
I grabbed Kate’s arm, a weakness suddenly capturing my legs. “Mr. Campbell just arrived.”
Kate’s eyes rounded. She didn’t take long to locate him. “I didn’t know he was acquainted with the viscount.”
“Well, it appears that he is.”
He had greeted the man before he had even greeted me.
Was I certain he had seen me? Yes. Mr. Campbell had been scowling at me from the doorway, as if shocked to have found me here.
Surely he would make his way in my direction eventually.
The last time I had seen him, we had been kissing in the stairwell.
How could he choose to ignore me after that?
The notion was preposterous, so I put it from my mind.
“You must not approach him,” Kate said in a firm voice, pulling me from my thoughts. “This is part of our test. He should approach you first.”
I wholeheartedly agreed, but my stomach still fluttered with nervousness. What would I say to him? Was it better not to acknowledge what had happened between us?
What was the most proper course of action?
I had never fretted or planned so much for our interactions, but this was a new scenario entirely. He had made his feelings known. If he was a gentleman, he would honor them.
“But you mustn’t look like you are awaiting him.” Kate led me a few steps forward. “Let us act as naturally as possible.”
Before I could object, she engaged a trio of ladies in conversation.
I had never met any of them, so Kate introduced me as her friend and companion.
The ladies took little interest in me, for which I was grateful, so I remained silent, keeping an eye on Mr. Campbell as he concluded his conversation with the viscount.
One of the ladies in our circle had a large feather in her hair, and I was tempted to hide behind her. Why was I so dashed shy? All of Kate’s warnings and plans to ‘test’ Mr. Campbell were awakening deep insecurities within me.
My heart pounded so hard it hurt as Mr. Campbell turned to face the rest of the crowd. His features were stern and serious as he examined each quadrant of the room.
Was he looking for me?
I didn’t want to be caught staring so unabashedly, so I focused my attention on Kate again.
My skin was hot as I awaited the moment he would see me.
Surely it would only take a few seconds before he was on his way across the room.
My curiosity tugged at me, so I stole one more peek in his direction.
His gaze connected with mine, but he didn’t move. A flash of uncertainty crossed his features, and he looked away quickly.
My heart sank. He hadn’t even smiled or so much as acknowledged that I existed.
A pang of sadness stabbed my chest. There was still a way to justify his actions, of course.
He might have seen that I was engaged in conversation and hadn’t wished to inconvenience me.
I could still have hope that when the moment was right, he would approach.
Perhaps he would even ask me to dance. The idea of dancing with him set my heart racing all over again.
When Kate’s conversation faded, we bid farewell to her friends and started toward the adjacent side of the room. “Follow me.” Kate seemed aware of my distress, and was determined to remedy it. I struggled to calm my nerves as I followed her closer to where Mr. Campbell stood.
His hair looked nearly as dark as his jacket, his white cravat contrasting sharply with both.
As Kate and I drew closer, his eyes flickered in my direction.
Why did he look…startled? I was reminded of the first few times I had approached him at parties.
He had been eager to avoid me then. Was he now?
Kate’s concern over his lack of public attention toward me was beginning to feel painfully real.
Were the rumors true? The doubt I had been trying desperately to avoid began clawing its way through my heart.
I tugged at my gloves, pinching the skin on my forearms absentmindedly as my nerves spiraled out of control.
I released a tense breath. “I must speak with him.”
I thought I heard Kate tell me to be patient, but I was already on my way toward Mr. Campbell.
He noticed my approach, but his reaction was not as I would have hoped. Not even a flicker of a smile crossed his lips as his eyes took me in. He stood with stiff posture, his gaze twitching to the left as if he were considering darting away from me.
I nearly stopped walking. Why did he look so wary? He was watching me the way Aunt Julia watched bees.
I stopped in front of him anyway. I could hardly look at his face, so I stared at the floor as I curtsied. “Mr. Campbell. I-I was surprised to see you here.”
A few seconds passed before he replied. “ You were surprised?”
My gaze flew up to his face. Why did his voice sound so cold? Even his features were stony. He seemed to recognize the abruptness of his tone, because his face softened.
But only slightly.
He cleared his throat. “I didn’t know you were acquainted with the viscountess.”
“Before this evening, I was not. I am attending as Mrs. Ollerton’s companion.” I studied his features, an unsettling feeling stirring through my stomach. Why did he look so unfamiliar? He stared down at me as if I were a stranger, or worse…
As if he wished I were.
“I see.” Mr. Campbell’s brief reply was followed by a long stretch of silence.
I struggled to find my voice amid the constant prattle and music around us. He shifted uncomfortably on his feet, as if he were experiencing the same struggle. Could one kiss truly cause such awkwardness between us?
And why did he look so different?
There was something decidedly unpleasant about his countenance, though I couldn’t decipher exactly what it was.
Was he upset that I hadn’t agreed to meet him the afternoon before?
I had been flustered by his invitation. And then he had kissed me, and Hannah had nearly seen us… it had all happened so quickly.
“Are you upset with me?” I asked in a quiet voice. Even I heard the waver of emotion beneath the question.
“No.” Mr. Campbell shook his head. He still looked stunned. “I may need to step outside for a moment.”
I scowled. Was he feeling ill? “Are you all right?”
“Yes, not to worry. The ballroom is hot, that is all.” He turned to leave, but I followed him.
“I didn’t know you were so sensitive to heat.
” I barely managed to hide the vexation from my voice.
“You bore the heat of the sun quite comfortably just the other day.” I was trying to catch him in his excuses to escape me.
My emotions boiled over as I studied his brow. “You’re not even perspiring.”
He turned to face me. “I do not perspire.”
“That isn’t true.”
He glanced from left to right, releasing a tense breath before regarding me seriously. “I was much more comfortable in the sun with my lemonade than here with so many people and their pungent perfumes.”
I frowned. “You didn’t drink lemonade.”
He sighed, and I saw a flicker of frustration pass over his features.
It stabbed at my heart. He seemed torn between fleeing from my presence and avoiding the scene I might cause if he did so.
I fully intended to follow him out of the ballroom, and he must have sensed it.
Did he not even remember any of the details of that afternoon in his garden?
I remembered all of it vividly. Our terrible paintings, our conversations, the moment I had accidentally splattered paint on his face…
A lump formed in my throat, and my voice was little more than a shaky whisper. “If you are trying to avoid me, please say so. I have no intention of holding you to any…obligation you might feel after what happened yesterday.”
His brow twitched with confusion before smoothing over. “To what happenstance are you referring?”
My heart crumbled slowly, and the pain spread to both sides of my chest. I glared up at him to hide the tears that burned the back of my eyes. “If you are resolved to forget it, then I will too. And you shall not see me again.” I would possibly regret speaking so freely, but my pride demanded it.
I thought Mr. Campbell would be rueful or apologetic, but a faint smile flickered over his lips. He dipped his head as if to hide it, and then it was gone.
I wanted to slap him.
Kate was right. The rumors were true.
He was toying with me.
He had been all along. How else could he be so amused by my pain? My face burned hot, a deep sense of betrayal spreading through my stomach. I thought I might become ill all over his boots. I hoped I would. They were always far too polished and perfect.