Chapter 32
Beth
Racing back to her own home, Beth’s adrenaline flushed through angrily from Spencer’s unexpected announcement. She wasn’t supposed to have stress in her life. Peace was needed in order to help heal, but stress ruled, making itself known. Her heart pounded and she couldn’t think straight. Rage was the only thing working, using all the energy she had left to make it to the other side of her front door. Sweat built and air was limited as her stomach churned over and over.
Port Berry no longer existed. Nothing did. Just the palpitations, the hot flushes, and the never-ending agitation.
How Beth made it home so fast was beyond her. She parked the pram in the living room and dashed to get a glass of water from the kitchen tap. No sooner had the water touched her lips than a shiver removed the heat, and she started to calm her breaths, not wanting to feel so tightly wound, as it was no good for her to have high anxiety levels.
There were techniques she had learned, and now was the time to bring them out of her tool bag. The natural art of sedation.
‘Come on,’ she mumbled again and again, hoping her muscle memory would work.
Archie wasn’t making any noises, which was helpful, as it was best he slept through her agitated state, as even though she was sure he wouldn’t understand, she didn’t want him to see her with beetroot cheeks, huffing and puffing.
Beth went to the bathroom to splash her face, the cool water waking her fully from the nightmare that had just taken place. What on earth was Spencer thinking? Should she have dashed away so fast? Perhaps things could have been sorted had they spoken.
With her head dipped, she shook her head at the mess they were now in.
‘Calm,’ she whispered. ‘Calm is key.’
Jan had taught her so much, so she knew if she relaxed first, she could then figure out what to do about the situation.
Beth felt disappointed she had left the park now, but she had to get away, as she was fuming that he wouldn’t speak to her.
She made her way to the sofa, telling herself it would get sorted soon. She just needed to process, and no doubt Spencer would want to talk to her at some point.
‘Argh!’ she growled through gritted teeth.
Why had he taken a DNA test without telling her? She wouldn’t have minded. If the shoe were on the other foot, perhaps she would have taken a test too, but for him to do it behind her back, then not speak to her afterwards, was all a bit much.
She started to settle a touch, but her mind was still filled with questions. She flopped back, covering her face with her hands while taking a long calming breath.
Tiredness hit hard, acting as though it were doing her a favour. It wasn’t rest she needed, it was control of her crumbling life.
There were two options. She could call her cousin and ask to stay with her for a while so she could avoid everyone in Port Berry, which she was sure would be okay with Pearl, or she could call Jan to tell her about the stress hijack she had stopped from taking her down.
Jan won and was quick to answer her phone, and once Beth explained what had happened, Jan reassured her everything would be okay. She offered to come over, but Beth was shattered, not to mention perplexed. All she really wanted was to talk to Spencer, but she had more chance of having a dinosaur come over for tea.
After a long chat with her therapist, she stood, adopting one of Leo’s superhero poses. Enough was enough. Even though she knew about her condition now, it was still exhausting having to battle the monster, but one thing she knew thanks to Jan was not to cower away. Stress would always be part of life. At least she coped well enough when challenged, and she felt quite proud of her achievement.
Anxiety had tried to rise, but her techniques dampened the flames, and it was good to know she had the ability to calm herself.
She wasn’t going to sit around twiddling her thumbs or going over what she should have said to Spencer.
‘Do you know what, flat, it’s time you became a home.’
She would tackle Archie’s bedroom, because one way or another, she wasn’t reverting to her old ways. A new woman had emerged from the darkness, and she was stronger, wiser, and more confident.
She went to the kitchen, thinking it was probably best to have a wipe round before starting anything. It had been a while since she’d been home, so some dust had accumulated, which wouldn’t do. She’d have to get some food in later as well.
‘Right!’ Slapping her hands on her hips, she scanned the area, thankful there was still so much she hadn’t taken to Spencer’s.
His hurt face flashed through her mind once more. All the pain was right there in his eyes.
Would he answer if she called? Should she try or leave him alone? It didn’t feel right leaving the wound open, but what choice did she have if he didn’t want to listen?
Beth sighed. ‘What a mess.’ And she didn’t mean the kitchen. She couldn’t blame Spencer for his actions, but after the bond they’d built together, she did expect a little more from him. At the very least a chat.
Archie murmured, so she went to check on him. He wriggled, then went back to sleep. It was settled. She’d clean the kitchen, sort his bedroom so it was ready to be decorated, feed and change him when he woke, then they’d pop down to the local shop and get some food.
As for Spencer, it was his move to make, as she couldn’t force him to speak to her. She glanced at the front door as though willing him to knock. Her phone vibrated, bringing a rush of excitement, but it was just a message from Lottie, asking if she was okay and could they talk.
‘Nope.’ Beth placed the screen downwards and got to work. It wasn’t Lottie she wanted to speak to. The talk that was needed was going to be saved for Spencer only. Just like Jan had taught her, energy was precious and should be saved for important moments.
Knowing all too well what lack of energy felt like, Beth knew how to manage hers now. There was no way she was wasting any in the wrong areas. And with energy in mind, she went over to the sink to pull on a pair of pink rubber gloves.
* * *
Archie’s room was an empty shell, and an online search found the perfect wallpaper. With that ordered, it was time to get some groceries, but first she needed to look up something else.
It didn’t take long to do some research into paternity testing offered online. Even without knowing which company Spencer had used, she got the gist of the process and could see how things might go wrong. And with that in mind, she ordered some testing kits herself.
She just hoped Spencer got in touch with her so she could sort the issue.
Not wanting any more anger to surface, Beth got ready to tackle the shops.
Just as she got her son snuggled in his pram, someone knocked on her door, causing her stomach to flip. Glancing at the clock, she could see it had been a good few hours since she bolted from the festival. Surely it wasn’t over already. No, it was too early. Perhaps it was a neighbour at the door. Maybe a parcel had been left with them while she was away.
To Beth’s surprise, Lottie and Samuel were there, both looking awkward but friendly enough. ‘You’d better come in.’
‘It was my idea to come, not my brother’s.’
Samuel rested a hand on Lottie’s shoulder. ‘We wanted to make sure you’re okay.’
Beth saw the strong team before her, taking on life together. She had hoped that for her own short-lived relationship, but the first sign of trouble, and she was left alone. She mentally shook her head at her thoughts. As annoyed as she was, Spencer was not to blame. Anyone would have reacted the same way. She was the traitor who had stabbed him in the back. At least, that was how he would see it, she was sure.
‘I’m just heading out to get some food.’
‘This won’t take long,’ said Lottie.
‘Look, I know what you’re going to say. That—’
‘Archie’s my nephew.’
That wasn’t what Beth thought she would say, and it left her speechless for a moment.
Lottie gave a slight nod. ‘I believe he’s family. I believe you.’
‘Why?’ was all Beth could think to say.
Samuel smiled. ‘Part from the fact he’s Lottie’s double, we’ve got to know you, and we’re struggling to believe you’re a liar.’
Beth warmed at their trust. ‘Thank you, and I want you to know I didn’t lie. I looked up online testing places, and during my search, I discovered results can sometimes be wrong. Labs can make mistakes, but so can the person who performed the test. Anyway, I want you to know I’ve ordered five testing kits from different places, all fast delivery. Should arrive first thing. I want to carry out the tests myself.’
‘In case Spencer messed it up,’ said Samuel.
‘Oh, I know someone messed something up, because there is no way anyone else can be Archie’s father. It’s just not possible.’
Lottie moved forward. ‘I do believe you, Beth, but my brother is all over the place right now. When he calms down, he’ll see what’s staring him in the face, and these new tests will help settle him, I’m certain.’
‘Do you think you can get him to do more tests?’
Lottie nodded. ‘I think it’s for the best. Like you said, things can go wrong. If you like, we can do the tests at my house. Neutral ground, and all that. I can do them with you both watching, if that helps.’
‘Thanks, we can do that. And I just want you to know I’m not mad at Spencer for not believing me. I was just thrown by it all. I’m annoyed he didn’t speak to me about this though. I’m not sure why he thought he couldn’t.’
‘He thought it might upset you,’ said Lottie.
‘Did you know?’
‘I knew he considered the idea after a friend of his told him a paternity horror story, but I didn’t know he had gone through with it. I guess it must have niggled at him.’ Lottie clenched her fists. ‘Ooh, I’ve a good mind to sue that DNA place.’
‘Spencer could have easily contaminated part of the procedure. As soon as I read about it, I knew more testing was in order to help him see that. Also, it helps if the mum takes a test too, which, obviously, I didn’t,’ said Beth.
‘We’ll get this sorted, Beth.’ Lottie offered a warm smile.
Beth sighed. ‘I think if the next five tests come back negative, I need to see a doctor to find out if there’s another way, because Archie is your nephew.’
Lottie bobbed her head. ‘I know, Beth. Truly, I believe you, and I’m so sorry this has happened. I can only imagine how awful you must feel. But please know, we’re on your side, and not because I want you and Archie to be our family, but because I believe in my heart of hearts you are.’
‘I really appreciate that. Thank you.’ Beth took a slow and steady breath. Lottie and Samuel both had kind eyes, and she was so grateful for their friendship and their trust.
Lottie nodded. ‘Come straight over as soon as the tests arrive.’
‘I wish we had them now.’
‘Me too, for my brother’s sake mostly. He’s in so much pain right now.’
‘He won’t speak to me, but please tell him I’m not lying.’
Lottie raised her chin defiantly. ‘Oh, I will. There’s one thing you have to learn about Spencer. He can be his own worst enemy at times. I’ll not take any of his stubbornness, not when I know it’s for his own good.’
‘He should have a clearer head by morning,’ said Samuel, looking hopeful.
Beth smiled at them. ‘I’d do anything to prove I’m not lying. Even if Spencer didn’t want to be with me, I want him to know Archie is his son. I know the tests won’t hurt my son. It’s the results I’m worried about, after the last one.’
‘There was obviously some sort of glitch,’ said Lottie. ‘And by this time next week, that will be proven.’
‘I do hope so, because I honestly have no idea what to do if every test in the world doesn’t match father and son.’
‘It’ll be all right, Beth.’ Lottie raised her hands. ‘I’ll do the tests in front of you both, and we can all see that each and every step of the process is done correctly. I’ll sterilize the table, wash my hands four times over, make sure everything is super clean. Nothing will go wrong.’
Beth breathed out a small laugh, not really finding anything funny. ‘Let’s hope not.’
‘I’ll try to get him to call you tonight.’ Lottie glanced at Samuel, who smiled her way.
‘It’s all right,’ said Beth. ‘As long as he turns up at yours tomorrow.’
Lottie’s hesitation wasn’t exactly encouraging. ‘I’m sure things will be different by morning. He had a shock.’
‘He wasn’t the only one.’
Lottie looked to Samuel again.
‘We’ll let you get on,’ he said, thumbing towards the door. ‘Unless you need us to stick around. Help you with anything.’
‘Thanks, but I’m okay.’ Beth was looking forward to some peace and quiet.
There wasn’t anything left to do till morning. Putting it to the back of her mind for a while was the rest she needed. Whatever happened after five DNA tests were sent off was out of her hands. All she could do was pray Spencer got the confirmation he deserved.
When Lottie and Samuel left, Beth glared at the ceiling.
Why me? One reckless drunken night, and now look. Dodgy DNA results and a broken heart .
She walked over to the pram to meet Archie’s bright eyes. ‘I should have named you Silver Lining.’
He offered a little smile, warming her immediately.
‘Whatever happens, son, you and me are going to be just fine,’ she whispered, gaining herself another smile.