Chapter Thirteen
“What do you mean she’s not here?” Lance sounded dumbfounded.
Marcy couldn’t believe she had to tell Lance this news. Trying desperately to explain, she elaborated. “She asked to go into your bedroom and watch her programs on the big TV. I didn’t see any reason to say no. Nico and I were playing games in the living room, and she refused to join us.”
“Did you check everywhere?”
“Of course we did… both Nico and I did. He knew different hiding places and showed them to me, but she wasn’t in any of them.”
“Check the closet again. This time look behind the clothes. There’s an alcove there she used to like going into when she was little. Please.”
Clutching her phone while calling Rosie’s name, Marcy ran back to the room where she’d seen Rosie disappear to a while ago and searched the closet once again… even checked under the bed. “Lance, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say. She’s gone.”
Rachel, who’d been listening in on the call, tried to soothe the woman she sensed meant a lot to Lance.
“It’s okay. She’s been doing this lately at home too.
Just taking off for short times but she always comes home.
We’ll just go to my house, and she’ll probably be there.
” She handed the phone back to Lance and listened as he calmed Marcy.
***
When Lance finished with Marcy, he put his phone in his pocket and took Rachel’s arm, wanting to instill confidence in her that he wasn’t sure he felt himself. “You’re right, Rachel. No doubt Rosie decided to go home. I’ll take you there to pick her up.”
Following his lead, Rachel felt anger begin to swell and couldn’t stop herself from sharing.
“My little Rosie has become so bratty lately. I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t say this about my own daughter but the difference in just a few months has been unbelievable.
She used to be such a sweet little girl, always willing to help with the chores and take care of her brother.
Back then, there were times that I don’t know what I’d have done without her giggling and cheeriness in the house. ”
Speaking softly, he joined in. “I’ve noticed the change too.”
Rachel swiveled his way. “You have? Yet she always behaves herself when you’re around. She adores you.”
Flattered, Lance wanted to let it go at that, but he couldn’t.
“Truthfully, she’s come closer to me because there’s been such a rift between her and Damon.
And in her little world, I’m the next man in line.
Remember when she thought the sun rose and set on her daddy?
He loved the attention and would be kind to her. Not so much in the last few years.”
“You’ve noticed it too? How heartbreaking it is to watch her little face drop with disappointment when he shoves her hugs aside with only a pat on the head – if that.”
Voice tight, Lance replied, “Maybe it’s wrong to talk this way considering what’s happened, but we both know he can be a grade-A asshole.”
Snorting her agreement, she added, “The only bright side on being born first, she got more attention than Nico ever did. For such a masculine person, I thought giving him a son would be the ultimate. When the nurse said we’d be having a boy, I had such high hopes he’d come around.”
“But he didn’t.” Lance made his reply into a statement because he already knew the answer.
“Nope. Things got worse. He… he became moody and dark. His nature was never ultra cheery, yet after Nico arrived, he purposely picked fights and used them as excuses to walk away and leave the house… leave me feeling so-so shitty.” Rachel heard her snarky voice and felt terrible.
Astonished for telling her truth and guilty for sharing it, she couldn’t seem to stop herself from stating exactly what was in her mind.
“He-he asked for Rosie. Not me. Her. Now… at a time when I thought… no… hoped he’d remember our love…
hell, even feel remorse for cheating… he shocked me.
I expected… frankly, I don’t know what I expected.
But it wasn’t this. His one request… to see his Rosie, well that’s really thrown me. ”
Obviously hearing the pain hidden in those words, Lance took quite some time before speaking. Then he just stared deep into her eyes and whispered, “He’s out of his mind.”
Rachel didn’t know what to say. Did he mean Damon was injured and not knowing what he was saying, or did he mean something else. Too shy to ask, and not sure she wanted to know the answer, she nodded.
Soon, they pulled into the driveway, and Rachel ran from the truck, calling her daughter’s name. “Rosie. Where are you?”
Five minutes later, she met Lance in the hallway. Both shaken and stunned, they looked at each other before Rachel said what they both knew. “She’s not here either.”
Lance scratched his head then slid his hands into his front pockets, his habit when he had nothing to add or held back words he didn’t want to share.
“What? Tell me. She’s gone. What aren’t you saying?”
Her forceful manner cut through his defenses, and he admitted his idea. “I’m wondering if she went to find me, okay? She could be thinking that I’m at work. As you said earlier, we’ve gotten pretty close lately. Maybe she went looking for me.”
“Oh, my God, you’re right. Let’s go.”
While driving, Rachel had to ask the question that popped into her head. “Why did you react like you didn’t want to tell me your idea? What you were thinking?”
Hedging, he said, “What do you mean?”
“Whenever you’re holding back an opinion, you have the tendency to put your hands in your pockets. You just did that earlier. Why?”
Lance twisted to look at her for a few seconds before returning his eyes to the road. “I do that?”
“Yes. A lot. Or at least when you’re around me and the kids.”
“Guess it’s because there’s so many things I want to tell you, but I can’t. Makes me nervous.”
“Things like what?”
“Christ, Rachel. It’s hard to put into words. Drop it.”
“No. Tell me.”
“Jesus girl, it’s tough for me to share my feelings. You know that ability has always been Damon’s. Guess I grew up to be more reserved.”
“Because Damon always stole your spotlight.”
Lance grinned. “Well he is older and a whole lot bigger than me.”
“Okay – but only in size. You’ve always been stronger. It’s why Rosie would go to you. I hope you’re right, and she’s there.”
Lance reached across for her hand. When their fingers were linked, he added, “You’re the one who make me nervous. You happy now?”
“No.” She squeezed his fingers, letting him see she was being genuine. “I wonder if I’ll ever be truly happy again.”
Silence reigned for the next few miles as each of them reflected on what had been said.