Chapter 65 #2
“It was a huge televised trial at the time. It must be almost twenty years ago now, but back then, everyone was watching. The alpha in the case was part of a bonded pack with two other alphas and an omega. One night, he grew so possessive of their omega that he attacked his pack members. He killed one of them, and when the omega tried to interfere, he turned on her and she ended up having to be hospitalized.”
“That’s horrible,” Lucy said. “But I don’t understand…”
“The alpha, Turner, had HA,” Dr. Finch said.
“Doctors testified at trial that he couldn’t be held accountable for his actions because, according to them, HA-induced rut is a form of insanity.
People were furious when he was acquitted, and there were petitions to make it illegal for alphas with HA to bond with omegas. ”
“Because we’re not safe for them,” I said, my voice hoarse. “I’ve known since then I could never be a part of a pack.”
I jolted when Lucy’s fingers brushed against my cheek. “But you are a part of a pack. Our pack.” Her voice was soft and tender.
“I shouldn’t be,” I said harshly. “I tried to stay away, but I obviously failed. I thought maybe it would be okay if I took extra suppressants and avoided touching you too much. Even with all of that, I almost lost it that night after speed dating.” My cheeks flushed.
I didn’t want to have this conversation with an audience, but it was safer for Dr. Finch to be here.
She could at least call security if I lost control.
“I can’t ever get that close to you again. I can never knot you or bond you.” Fuck, my cock ached at just the mention of it. “I don’t add anything of value to this pack. You’re better off without me.”
Lucy scowled and turned to the doctor. “What do you think?”
Here it was. Dr. Finch would tell Lucy the truth, and we would part forever.
“I think the two doctors who testified at the trial were full of shit.”
Wait, what?
“They based their testimony on a study that was later withdrawn from the Journal of Designation Sciences because the data was falsified. There’s no evidence that alphas with HA are more dangerous than the average alpha.
It’s become a whole political thing—alphas want to use an HA defense in court so they don’t face consequences of their bad behavior while also maintaining their rights to bond and be part of packs. It’s ridiculous.”
Lucy fixed me with a triumphant expression as I tried to make sense of the doctor’s words.
“Many alphas struggle to deal with the new surge of hormones when they first come into their designations,” she continued.
“We often see an increase in physical aggression in alpha teenagers and young adults, whether or not they have HA. Suppressants can be one form of treatment, but other things can help, too. Physical activity is one of them, so I’m not surprised firefighting is a good fit for you.
But there are actually a lot of other things that can help young alphas regulate themselves, like dance, art, and meditation.
For some shocking reason, those aren’t promoted as often.
” The doctor’s voice was drenched with sarcasm.
“No matter what, there is no excuse for abusive behavior, no matter your designation.”
Lucy wiggled happily on my lap, a satisfied smile on her face. “I’m the perfect omega for you, then. I love crafts. We can do them together.”
My mouth was open, but no words came out as my entire perspective of myself shifted.
“In addition to the lack of evidence around HA being a cause of abuse or violence, there’s another reason I’m not concerned about you and Lucy being together,” Dr. Finch said. “Do I have permission to share about your medical history, Lucy?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“Lucy has a condition called HO, or hyper omestrogen. It means she has higher levels of the hormone omestrogen than the average omega, making her instincts more prominent.”
I tightened my hold on Lucy. “Does it hurt you?”
“No, not at all,” she said, leaning into my chest. “I’m on suppressants—a safe dose, since I can’t get mine over the counter like you can.” She rolled her eyes. “They help keep things even. But…” She chewed her lip, her cheeks heating. “I’m still kind of a lot, even for an omega.”
Dr. Finch made a disgruntled noise, and I was in complete agreement.
“Who fucking said you’re a lot?”
Lucy’s scent instantly lost its bitter edge, transforming into a deep, floral sweetness that did not help my hard-on.
“I’m really needy,” she whispered. “And instead of getting better as the relationship goes on, it gets worse.”
My lips twitched. “I think I can handle that.”
Dr. Finch seemed completely unfazed by the drama unfolding before her, but maybe she was used to it, working in designation medicine.
Before I made any promises to Lucy, I had to be sure. “How can you guarantee I won’t hurt Lucy?”
“I can’t.”
My heart stopped, my chest seized, and even though it made no sense, I tightened my hold on Lucy when I should be letting go.
“But,” she continued, “I am very confident that if you hurt her, it won’t be because of your condition.”
A sigh escaped me and I buried my face in the crook of my omega’s neck.
“I’m going to step out for a few minutes, but I’ll be back to address any lingering concerns.” The door shut softly behind her.
Lucy rubbed her cheek against mine, scent-marking me. And then something happened I never expected to experience in my life—she started purring. The sweet vibration filled me from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. I was undone and remade in an instant, belonging completely to her.
“I’m so fucking sorry for the pain I’ve caused you this week. I promise I’ll do whatever I can to earn your forgiveness. I’ll host a million speed dating nights if it means I get to go home with you.”
“You won’t leave?” Her voice was vulnerable and unsure, the confidence and bravado she’d brought into the appointment melting away.
A responding purr rumbled through my chest. “Never. I don’t deserve you, but I won’t ever let you go. I love you.”
She cupped my face with both hands, and her big blue eyes scanned my face like she was peering into my soul. “I love you, too.”
Our lips met in a tender kiss, and it was almost enough to make me cry. “I never thought I’d get this again,” I murmured between kisses. “To hold you, taste your sweetness.”
She held me tighter, fingers twisting in my hair, and our kiss soon turned hungry. She nipped my lip, I dipped my tongue into her mouth. My fingers dug into her hip and she arched against me.
I groaned when she pulled away.
“We should maybe not do this here,” she said with a giggle.
I snorted. “Yeah, maybe not.” I ran my thumb across her cheek. “You’re mine, sweetheart. And I am completely yours. I could never belong to anyone else.”
She leaned into my touch, her eyes soft.
A knock at the door signaled Dr. Finch’s return. “Everything sorted?”
“Yep,” Lucy said, wiggling happily on my lap.
“Glad to hear it. Wilder, Annie’s going to come in and draw some blood so we can check your labs, but things were trending in a good direction by the time you were discharged from the hospital, so I don’t expect any surprises. You’ll get a call if we need to follow up on anything.”
“Wait, before we go, I have a question,” Lucy said.
Dr. Finch sat back down on the rolling chair.
“I’m thinking about going off my suppressants.”
A growl ripped through my chest and my scent surged at my omega’s words. All sound ceased, and I was consumed by the image of her in heat, her slick dripping onto the soft blankets and pillows I’d gifted her for her nest.
Knotting her and refusing to pull out for fucking hours.
Making her come over and over until she was sobbing from pleasure.
The doctor cleared her throat and pressed a button on her desk. The whirring sound in the room grew louder as the de-scenter machine kicked into high gear. Lucy laughed and patted my chest in what was supposed to be a soothing gesture but did nothing to bank my intense need to claim her.
“You haven’t had a heat before, is that right?” The doctor kept her attention on Lucy, both omegas ignoring my reaction.
“Correct. I wanted to check if there was anything I needed to do to prepare for going off my suppressants.”
“I’ll prescribe you some supplements and I recommend focusing on eating nutrient-dense and high-calorie meals. Many omegas find it hard to eat during heats, and putting on some extra weight ahead of time can be helpful.”
“Will it be a problem that I’m practically ancient for a first-time heat?”
It was Dr. Finch’s turn to laugh. “I’m not sure twenty-nine counts as ancient quite yet.
It’s hard to tell how each omega will react.
As you’re going off the suppressants, you are at risk for breakthrough heats and surges, which usually last for a few hours at a time.
It’s a good idea to make sure you stick close to your pack during that time, just to prevent being caught by surprise.
There’s no reason your full heat wouldn’t be normal, although omegas with HO usually have heats that are one day longer than average. ”
“That sounds good.”
Lucy moved off my lap as the nurse came back in the room to draw my blood, but my eyes never left her. I vibrated with energy, my alpha and I finally unified in a desperate need for my omega.
And for the first time, that didn’t scare me.