Chapter Five #2
Once we got to Brax’s, he went into the kitchen and got to cooking in a festive Christmas apron that caused plenty of razzing. He just shrugged good-naturedly and pulled Henry in to help him. Henry stood on a little stool beaming while Brax gave him instructions.
River Pearl’s brows rose. “Wow, Henry, you’re pretty special.” She hugged him hard, and Brax shooed her and the rest of us out. While the girls talked about the gallery, Booker sat down at Brax’s piano and played some more Christmas music while I accompanied him on the guitar.
Right before dinner was ready, Aubree drifted over. The girls must have been finished discussing stuff. Aubree said, softly, “Boone, can I talk to you outside for a minute?”
“Sure, Breebree,” I said, following her out to the deck.
“I want you to know how sorry I am to hear about Verity. This must be so hard on both of you.”
She hugged me, and I hugged her back just as hard.
She sat down on a bench and patted the seat next to her. “I’ve talked this over with Booker, and he is one hundred percent on board. I wanted to offer to be a surrogate mother for you two.”
At first it was like a bullet to the brain, totally life-altering, totally unexpected, and completely mind-blowing.
I couldn’t move a muscle. I stared at her, and when she smiled, I closed my eyes and hugged her fiercely.
My chest expanded, and she tightened her arms even more.
Her eyes, full of compassion and love, met mine.
“Are you sure?” My voice broke, my eyes stinging.
“Yes, I told my mom that Booker and I weren’t ready to have a family, and that hasn’t changed, but I’m committed to you and Verity. I will work things out with my schedule.”
“Won’t this be hard on you?”
“It’s not going to be easy, but Boone, nothing worthwhile ever is. I love you and Verity so much. You deserve to have a house full of children if that’s what you want. You both have so much to give. Let me be the vessel of your joy and commitment to each other.”
“I can’t speak for Verity, but for myself? Yes. I accept, with all my heart.”
“Exactly. I think she’s floundering right now, so Booker and I discussed it and agree that it might be best to tell you and have you bring it up to her. They’ll have to harvest her eggs and your sperm first. Then by artificial insemination fertilize her egg with your sperm.”
I flushed at that, but Breebree was completely doctor-like and never cracked a smile.
“Then I’ll be the surrogate. It will totally be your genetic material, and the child would be as if you’d conceived it naturally. Then, nine months later— voilà . You’ve got yourself a son or daughter.”
“Thank you, Breebree. I don’t have the words to thank you adequately.
” I turned my head, and saw my brother standing at the sliding glass door.
Our eyes met, and I felt such gratitude and love for him, and for Braxton.
They had always had my back and always would.
He smiled and nodded, and I nodded back. It was all we needed.
For the rest of the evening I walked around feeling like a beacon light was aglow within. We had options. We could move forward with a second, and maybe even a third child, if that worked out.
I was both happy and apprehensive about talking to Verity about it, so when the next day rolled around and we went to mass with her family and then to dinner, I was still kicking around the best way to tell her about the offer.
I also was wrestling with my own secret. I knew I had to talk to her about it, and mustn’t put it off anymore.
After dinner, Verity’s father pulled me aside and asked me about building a shed behind the rectory to store the numerous church decorations. I agreed and walked out to scout out the place and take notes.
When I came up to the front of the church, my intention was to scoot between it and the rectory for a quick shortcut.
As I approached, I saw a small figure sitting on the church stairs with a prone beagle next to him, and my heart lurched up into my throat.
I dropped the pad and pen and started running.
“Geezus! Henry? My, God. Henry!” His face was swollen on one side, his lip split and still bleeding.
Bonkers wagged his tail and tried to move, but cried out loudly and then whimpered.
Henry was crying hard, snot and tears mingling, and he was holding his arm at a strange angle.
His shoulder was almost certainly dislocated.
“Verity!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. “Verity!”
She came racing out of the house, her parents and Ethan right behind her. When she saw Henry, she made a soft sound and rushed to us. “Oh, God, Boone. What happened?”
“I don’t know. I found him like this. We have to get him to Doc’s right away,” my voice fierce.
“I think his shoulder is dislocated.” I felt frantic, but knew I had to keep it together for Henry’s sake.
He had already been through something violent, and me losing my shit over it wasn’t going to help calm him.
“Easy,” I told him. “Everything’s going to be okay. It’s okay.”
I shot a look at Verity, handing her my keys and she made a beeline for the car. “I know you’re pretty scared, and you’re hurt, but I’m going to help you. We’re going to keep you safe.”
Henry nodded, a fearful anxiety pinching his face, his eyes glimmering with fresh tears.
A fierce tightness clamped around my lungs.
I scooped my arms under Henry. His bones were so small, so fragile, and I had to swallow to keep my throat from closing up when he moaned when I adjusted my grip on him.
When Verity drove up, I said, “Ethan, the dog is hurt. Could you take him to the vet?”
“Absolutely. What’s his name?”
“Bonkers.”
He gently slipped his hands under the dog, and Bonkers let out a howling cry. Ethan swore viciously under his breath and Henry buried his face in my neck and started crying again. As fast as Ethan could go with the injured dog, he got to his car, put Bonkers into the back seat and drove off.
“We’ll meet you at the hospital,” Verity’s father said when he pulled open the passenger side door and I got in.
An hour later, Verity used her phone while Henry had been cleaned up and X-rayed.
She was now cuddling him while she whispered to him.
No broken bones, but his shoulder was dislocated, and I helped Doc Rust get it back in the socket.
Now the initial shock had passed, my anger was hissing and bubbling like lava.
I deep breathed through everything while Doc Rust gave me worried looks as he took care of Henry.
As soon as Henry was set and his arm in a sling, I headed for the door.
“Boone! No! Don’t go after him!” Verity said
I couldn’t answer. I had only one focus. To find Baker and fucking kill the bastard. My thoughts were chaotic, and blind rage took over, expanding like a tempest while I stormed down the hall.
I stepped out into the waiting room, and my brothers were standing at the door. That’s why Verity had been on her phone previously. She had wanted to make sure I didn’t go after Baker. Both my brothers had a familiar, determined look on their faces, and I growled. “Get out of my way!”
Neither one of them moved, and I advanced on them, intending to bulldoze my way through, but one grabbed me around the waist and the other around the upper chest. I struggled, but they bore me back and held me against the wall.
“Let me go!”
The door opened, and Ethan came in, his face scored and pinched. He looked at me, his eyes saying it all. “He’s in bad shape. The vet’s not sure if he’s going to make it, but they’ll do the best he can.”
I renewed my struggle to get loose. He’d really hurt Henry’s dog and that little boy grievously. I needed to pound his drunken, sorry-assed face into the ground.
The door opened again, and Sheriff Dalton came into the waiting room. He took one look at me and said, “There’s no need to go after him, Boone. The son of a bitch wrapped his truck around a tree. He’s dead.”
I clenched my fists, and my jaw, and a sound of rage escaped me, so anguished Verity ran over to me and pulled me against her.
We took Henry home with us, and I held him until he fell asleep. When I came out of the bedroom, Verity was working on one of the elf costumes.
She dropped her hands and said, “How is he?”
“Asleep. I want to keep him here until…” I covered my eyes and took several breaths. Verity’s arms came around me.
“We can keep him. That’s okay.”
I nodded, knuckling my eyes. “Verity, I need to talk to you, and I can’t put it off any longer.”
She tensed, but cooperated when I drew her to the couch and sat her down. “Yesterday, Breebree volunteered to serve as our surrogate.”
Verity’s face closed down, and she pulled away from me, but I held onto her arm.
“Listen to me,” I said. “I have to tell you that it ripped me up when you told me you had complications with Duel. I felt guilty and responsible. I also felt like you didn’t trust me.
Holding back that information was unfair and wrong.
I had a right to know. Just like I had a right to know about Duel being my son. ”
“I explained all that, Boone.”
“I understood about Duel. I didn’t like it, but I understood. But not telling me about the possibility of not being able to have more kids. That I don’t understand.”
“I didn’t do it on purpose.”
“I think you did.”
“What!?”
“You don’t like dealing with awful stuff.
You have a track record. But you need to learn life is full of awful stuff.
It’s just a matter of choosing how to handle it.
If we are to be united one hundred percent, we can’t hold anything back.
I need you, even when the decisions are hard, even when the decision breaks my heart.
I know that now. So I had to tell you. I love you so much.
I want that connection we had back. You need to deal with the awful stuff right now. ”
She looked at me, her expression bleak. “Boone, this has been a horrible few days.”
“Agreed, but were going to talk about this now, Verity.”
She hunched her shoulders and turned away, her body tight, as if she was trying to ward off the pain.
She tipped her head back, and I watched her, my face feeling like cement.
I knew I was backing her into a corner, and I knew I wasn’t being particularly nice about it, but I also knew we had to finish this, one way or another. Our marriage was on the line.
After a long, tense moment, she looked at me, her face deathly white. She stared, her eyes stark. “I don’t want to,” she whispered unsteadily. “I need time.” Her eyes pleading with me, she spread out her hand on my thigh.
My face stiff with renewed anger, I held her eyes.
“Time for what? We have Duel, and we have the opportunity to be there for Henry. He needs us now. He’s lost everything, and that made me realize that we have everything to give him.
We have our love, our care, and our family to give him.
I want to trust you again. But I need you to show me that you understand what I’m saying. ”
Tears came to her lashes, and she abruptly wiped them away, then folded her arms. She stared across the room, her profile strained. “What if I can’t?”
My temper flaring, I glared at her. I took a breath and looked away, making a conscious effort to check my anger, forcing my muscles to relax. “Then we don’t really have anything to talk about.”
There was a long, strained silence; I rose but stopped when she said, “I hurt you very badly, didn’t I?” she whispered unevenly.
“Yes,” I said, and then walked away. It was up to her now. She had to find the courage to meet me halfway—hell, even a quarter of the way, and I’d be there. But, bottom line, there couldn’t be any more secrets between us, ever.
If only I could get that feeling back, that unconditional faith and trust in her. I was wrestling with my feelings all over again, and guilt about adding to Verity’s heartache. While that kernel of pain I had stifled was getting bigger after the news that we couldn’t have any more children.
I was beginning to believe our relationship wouldn’t ever be the same, that between her secret and this terrible reality, our bond had been shattered.
So far Verity had refused to even consider options, much less explore them.
I hadn’t pushed it, but it was something we would need to discuss.
Afterward, I left her sleeping and called my brothers, asked them to spread the word so everyone knew and Verity wouldn’t have to go through it person by person.
That was as final as my resolve to do what I had to do, even though it would kill me.